Hope's Hopeless Ramblings (June 2, 2010)

Guys, yesterday I posted my last patra with the firm decision that it would be my last and I was going cold turkey on the show and this forum. Then started the PMs from the bachchas on this forum to all the aunties, and yes I was on the list of aunties. There was cajoling, scolding, threats, outright demands and other nefarious tricks. They wanted us back knitting needles, marriage advice, recipes, hair care tips and all. I realized then that I MISSED MY FORUM FRIENDS ALREADY A HUNDRED TIMES MORE THAN I HATE EKTA and how she has mocked God and marriage.

So, I'm back (like the proverbial bad penny or Archana)........ I don't know for how long (I may not be able to stand the PR drivel even if I try) or in what capacity (as I will not be writing a patra or seeing the show). My compromise is that I will stay in the forum but to retain my sanity will avoid the video epi. Updates, unfortunately, may need to be read (with a blank mind and a very slow pulse) to provide fodder for my ramblings (which if you are lucky will not be a daily affair).

However, before I ramble on I must issue a disclaimer to all those people who still hope for ArMan or are fans of Archana or Manav. Ekta has made a mockery of the show, and ArMan have made a mockery of marriage, love and the divine so I will be following their lead and using mockery as my PR therapy. This post is expected to be filled with my opinions, if it offends your sensibilities please feel free to ignore my ramblings as it is necessary for a successful therapy.

Hope's Hopeless Ramblings (June 2)

Ekta and Sushant ka Telly Chakkar

Guys, it said hell hath no fury than a woman scorned. Wow, Sushant picked the wrong person to scorn. I firmly believe that had it not been for his decision to join ZKND and create an alternate personality to Manav, the divorce would not have happened (because March and April looked promising to me). She "made" him with PR and when he two-timed her with ZKND and affected her shooting schedules, she decided to "break" him by killing Manav. Guys, Ekta seems to have an unholy crush on this commercial toy of hers and her true feelings have manifested themselves in the charachter Shravani (lucky for Pooja Pihal) . Imagine she used every one of our wishes on this forum to lower this character (and therefore the actor) into the depths of the gutters below.

Look at what she did:

1. The bolder we wanted him, the weaker she made him.
2. We said we did not like his feet, so she made him take an axe and chop them off
3. We said no two wife scenario, she made him the "Friendliest Dude" Archana will ever find.
4. We said respect Bappa and she made him get Bappa's blessings before the divorce on Sankashti (no less)👏
   

Chalo at least for today I am thankful for the fact that she did not make him hold Shravani's hand while bidding Archu goodbye. But then again there is always tomorrow so let us not lose heart.

Ekta's Fun Farm

The way I see it, the Deshmukh household has become Ekta's Fun Farm. Manav is the lab rat, Archana is the cheese he will always pursue, Shravani is the mouse trap and Sav aai is the lab tech leading him helter-skelter down the fun farm maze. Dam baba, Kaka and Vandu are just props.

The PR To-do List

Now that the divorce is done, I think Archana, Manav, and Shravani are going to be very busy people, so I have attempted to write a to-do list for each of them (activities are in no particular order).

Archana

• Change the name and address on her railway pass to remove the D residence info (so that when she faints next time she comes straight home and does not go visiting her married "friends")
• Buy a chastity belt (in case her family gets the unmentionable idea of remarrying her in an effort to stablize her life)
• Give her bridal clothes for dry cleaning and preservation (she is going to need it for the reunion when she is 80 years old)
• Resurrect the caftans and salwar kameezes (because sarees make kanyas look old)
• Frame the copy of the divorce transcript with a picture inset of the pregnant Shravani (so that she can place it above her bedplace where she can do aarti of it at night before going to bed)
• Start arrangements for the first Friendship Summit (the countdown has begun)
• Start writing her memoirs - "Founding and Living the Shakkar Philosophy"

Manav

• Pick up a manual and check out online tutorials about ahem. ( A crash course is desperately required)
• Quit his part-time job (the garage issue will be solved tomorrow thanks to his new FIL and seriously garage owners cannot be labourers, as his wife –to-be says it is beneath his new status)
• Severe his relation with his pav bhaji vendor. (they don't have this in the streets of US, so adjustment will be required)
  
• Buy a second cellphone with an unlisted number (to speak to his "friend")
• Sit back and enjoy the ride

Shravani

Give the order for gold plated name badges for her and Manav (his will read Manav Shravani Mahate-Deshmukh and hers will read Shravani Manav Deshmukh)

Buy some much needed home accessories (a leash with a long extension, a GPS chip for cell phones, ankle bracelets (the kind they use for people on house arrest)

Purchase Imported Bridal clothes by mail order (I was watching an old epi for Friends yesterday and apparently there is a wonderful boutique in New York for people in her predicament called "Its Never Too Late" Apparently Girishji placed the order when he was there.)

Hire a detective (who specializes in infidelity investigations) as a permanent employee of Girishji.

Get her dad to convince the condo developers to repost the evacuation notice on the chawl (apparently vimla, laxmi, etc are getting to vocal about the upcoming ManChoo marriage and this is quite bothersome)

Frame the copy of the divorce transcript with a picture inset of her guru Ekta (so that she can place it above her bedplace where she can do aarti of it at night before going to bed)

Guys:

I have a request, I wrote this not some much for humorous reflection but your participation, so press the "like " button if it was therapeutic but more importantly add a thought on one of the above topics in your post and let's build these lists so that we all have some PR therapy.

Hope

Welcome back Hope! Glad you changed your mind about leaving, I loved your post!! Excellent way to describe the horrible turn PR has taken!!