Redemption - A Tere bin OS
Meerab was feeling restless ever since they got home. Murtasim was avoiding her completely and wouldn’t even listen to what she had to say. She even made his favourite biriyani as Maa Begumm suggested but he just ate it in complete silence. She didn’t know why him getting hurt because of her was bothering her this much when she never cared before.
She sighed, his tears still haunted her after she had snatched his gun out of his hands. She tried not to let herself think about what would have happened if he had hurt himself instead of the flower pot he had shot, even the thought of losing him was starting to feel unbearable. Somehow Murtasim had become a part of her life and somewhere along the way she had started thinking of him as her own.
She looked at the clock as it chimed 11 pm. He still hasn’t come to their room, she was sure he’ll be smoking somewhere. She decided to go and check on him. She found him in their garden bench with a faraway expression on his face smoking away. She approached him cautiously, he didn’t acknowledge her, she sighed and sat down next to him. “Murtasim”, she called, no response. “Murtasim, come on it’s getting late. Come and sleep in our room”.
He scoffed at her, “Why do you even care where I sleep or what happens to me?”, Meerab looked at him helplessly, “How long are you going to agonize over what happened Murtasim? Please try to understand my side, he forced me to go with him, I agreed to avoid a scene but honestly I didn’t know he was this obsessed with me”.
Murtasim said angrily, “Whenever I have expressed my feelings for you, you always felt comfortable telling me how much you don’t like me and never will, but today since it’s your Rohail confessing his love for you, you listened to him quietly didn't you”, Meerab took his hands in hers and said sincerely, “Murtasim, I’m sorry okay, I shouldn’t have gone with him or at least told someone about it. I was too shocked to react. Please don’t hurt yourself because of me”, she said pleadingly.
Murtasim snatched his hands from her, gave her a cold look and went inside. Meerab grudgingly admitted she missed his teasing and half smiles even though they used to make her heart flutter uncomfortably. She went inside after a while and saw him sleeping on his side. She went quietly to her side of the bed and lay down. She couldn’t sleep as her thoughts were all over the place so she sat up and took the book from her bedside table. She noted it was the one Murtasim had given her. She opened it and found the contract she had made wedged between its pages. One more regret to her growing pile.
After a while she noticed Murtasim tossing and turning in his sleep. His blanket had slipped from him. Meerab knew he liked to cover himself well and snuggle under the covers when sleeping so she reached out and pulled the blanket up. Suddenly Murtasim woke up, grabbed her arms and gave her awhat-are-you-doing look. “I was just fixing your blankets”, Meerab mumbled and somehow managed to extract her arms from his grip. He looked down at the said blanket and nodded. When he looked over at her, he noticed the contract in her hands. He closed his eyes feeling unprepared for another onslaught of pain from the memories that piece of paper conjured up. He turned away from her.
Meerab had seen the pain he had hidden on seeing the sheet of paper in her hands and sighed inwardly. “Do you really hate me that much Meerab?”, Murtasim asked softly without turning around. Meerab said softly, “I don’t Murtasim, I really don’t hate you”.
“Will you ever reciprocate my feelings for you?”, Murtasim asked then scoffed at himself, “Who am I kidding. The closer I get to you, the farther you run away. You know what hurts the most, not you disrespecting me or not caring about me, it’s when he said you are not my wife but his friend and lover, for a second I believed him”, he laughed without humour, “He's right. You have never accepted me as your husband, and what’s stopping you from getting together with him, my anger I guess. Who knows you might even leave me this second if I set you free, and that’s what’s killing me inside”, he said softly.
Meerab who was silent through this whole tirade suddenly felt angry. She grabbed his arms and pulled him to face her. Murtasim was shocked but he sat upright nonetheless, “What do you think you are doing?”, he asked angrily. “What did you say? Do you think I am so cheap to just leave you and go with a another man just because he confessed his love for me?”, she laughed bitterly.
“Yes I admit when I married you all I wanted was to hurt you and your family just the way they hurt me, but, but…”, she trailed off helplessly. Her eyes had started tearing up, “After everything we have been through, after everything you did to protect my respect, I, I,…”, she shuddered choking on her tears. Murtasim’s heart broke seeing her pain but he managed to hold himself back.
“And this contract”, she said angrily crushing the papers in her hands, “Do you know why I drafted this thing before our marriage Murtasim. Imagine suddenly feeling like an orphan and forced to surrender yourself to a man you hated all your life but now having to trust your life with, I panicked obviously. Do you know how scared I was that you would not agree to it and throw me to the streets that day?”, she said with a faraway look in her eyes.
“But you agreed and never once forced me. You could have, I know it’s just a paper and you had the right to do anything you wanted but you kept your word. I started to trust you because of it. After a while it became just that, a paper. It doesn’t mean anything Murtasim”,she tore the contract and threw it away. “And you think I don’t accept you as my husband”, she scoffed at that, “If you really knew me, you know I wouldn’t be begging for your forgiveness if I didn’t think of you as my husband. But looks like we both don’t understand each other well”.
“And before you yell at me for trusting a friend and going with him, maybe you should look at yourself in the mirror before you drag your lovely Haya wherever you go. Her feelings for you is infamous around here, in case you forgot her attempts to throw me out to get to you”, she took a deep breath, “Leave it, do whatever you want”, she said and lay down facing away from him.
Murtasim looked at his wife’s back processing everything she had said. After a while of contemplating the risks, he put his arms loosely around her and scooted close to her. Meerab jerked around startled, “Wha-“, she started saying surprised but Murtasim stopped her, “Since the contract is out and you accepted me as your husband, let me at least hold you”, he said softly. Meerab looked ready to protest, “Please”, he gave her a pleading look. She sighed and let him hold her.
“Promise me you won’t meet him again”, Murtasim whispered after a while. Meerab put her hands on his arms around her and whispered back, “Promise”.
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Hello guys,
I fell in love with Tere Bin recently and after the last episode I was inspired to write this. Hope you like it and let me know your feedbacks. Thanks for reading!
Pati Patni Aur Panga
Kumkum Bhagya
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