||Under the veil of the Dark sky|| Nibir OS||

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.vishrutha.

@.vishrutha.

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Posted: 9 years ago

#11

That was lovely annie!

NiBir's convo at the start was very well written! 👍🏼

For a moment Kabir's dialogues made me wonder if he's bipolar or what?! 😆

Nisha's pov was really good! That darkness and her being the only one in the compartment gave me a scare!

Her hallucination of her baby speaking to her, Kabir and her conscience pushing her to fight those pervs and not give up was wonderfully written yar! 👏 Especially that 'I won' just before she fainted! Too good! 👏

Kabir's appology at last was again very nice and much needed!

Your stories get better with time and I agree with Mansi, please become our idea teacher! 😆

Do write more 😊

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mansi

@mansi_as18

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 9 years ago

#12

Originally posted by: .vishrutha.
That was lovely annie!
NiBir's convo at the start was very well written!👍🏼
For a moment Kabir's dialogues made me wonder if he's bipolar or what?!😆
Nisha's pov was really good! That darkness and her being the only one in the compartment gave me a scare!
Her hallucination of her baby speaking to her, Kabir and her conscience pushing her to fight those pervs and not give up was wonderfully written yar!👏Especially that 'I won' just before she fainted! Too good!👏
Kabir's appology at last was again very nice and much needed!
Your stories get better with time and I agree with Mansi, please become our idea teacher!😆
Do write more😊

see vishru agrees with me 😃

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arviabhigya

@arviabhigya

Sparkler

Posted: 9 years ago

#13

Brilliant 👏

Excellent piece of writing👏

Kept us at the edge of our seats👏👏

I must say in this past one year, your writing has improved by leaps and bounds👏👏👏

And I m so proud of my baccha for that😳

Loved all the parts in italic😃😃😃

Love how you described their fight and Nisha's thoughts after that

Loved the way u described Nisha taking note of her surroundings😃😃😃

Also that part where Nisha starts overthinking and thinks of going to her parents house was sp relatable as most ppl start overthinking things when they are in an angry or foul mood👏👏

Loved how her conscience or the voice inside her urged her to fight back⭐️⭐️👏

She was angry at him for saying all that! So, not his embrace!- loved this line😳

Loved the title u chose for her article and the irony of the situation

Edited by arviabhigya - 9 years ago

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Nimisha

@itznimi003

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 9 years ago

#14

Originally posted by: mansi_as18
see vishru agrees with me 😃

even me2 mujhe jo jo bolna tha sab vish ne bol diya...

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mishrialways

@mishrialways

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 9 years ago

#15

beautiful annie

really liked it

ur ideas are always awesome

love reading them👍🏼

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.vishrutha.

@.vishrutha.

Navigator

Posted: 9 years ago

#16

Originally posted by: itznimi003
even me2 mujhe jo jo bolna tha sab vish ne bol diya...

Great minds think alike 😆

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1060675

Hibernated

Posted: 9 years ago

#17

Another brilliant work of urs Annie👏👏
Beautifully written👏👏
The whole train seq was hell scary
I really loved how Nisha fought for herself,for her baby & for her Kabir😊
The last NIBIR scene was so beautiful❤️
Luved it totally😃