A/N: Hey there everyone! I know I'm supposed to be updated NC but instead ended up writing this. Now, I'll give out a fair warning that this is a very dark OS, so please read at your own risk. The CVs have really frustrated me enough to write this fic and I don't want to be the reason of your depressions as well, so there. My job of warning done. :) :)
Not keeping you'll for long,
Happy Reading! :D :D
Ranveer sat in his room, his eyes wandering about blankly, his mind abuzz with confusion. He felt conflicted, broken, lifeless. Ishaani was going to get married to Shikhar the next day and he to Ritika. He had tried his best to stop the marriage in all ways but couldn't. The marriage was inevitable - the final blow that needed to be delivered.
He was tired. Tired of battling with his feelings and emotions. Tired of lying to himself daily about how he hated Ishaani and about how she didn't matter to him anymore. If anything, she now only drove him insane with longing every time she was around him. He could feel his love and hatred for her now imploding within him, something that made him sick. His love will killing him every single day, taking away a little bit of life away from him every time he thought about her.
He was used to bearing betrayal and harsh words on a daily basis now, everybody suddenly interested in establishing the fact that he was a driver's son. He was proud of how he had made his fortune and a name for himself. He had raised himself from the ashes, but the fact remained. The past never leaves you. Not really.
He got up from the bed and stared at his reflection in the mirror. There was a sardonic look on his face, carefully structured to mock everything and everybody that crossed his scrutinizing gaze. He smiled and gently let the mask fall, satisfied at the fact that the house was empty save for his sole presence. He stared at his true form; not RV - King of Dalal Street and youngest billionaire, but instead at Ranveer Vaghela, the son of a driver and a broken man.
Ranveer could see a pair of haunted eyes in the mirror, his pupils dilated and its sides red. His eyes had dark circles underneath it along with purple bags. His lips were taut like it never knew what it was to smile. His cheeks has a sunken look about it and he looked far thinner than he had looked in all those months. He looked like a wreck, and he certainly was it. The camouflage was gone. There was no hiding and the time had come.
He sighed and took out a letter from his coat pocket and kept it on the night stand. He knew that Ritika would understand. She afterall, deserved far more than a broken man to take care of herself and the child. He nodded his head decisively one final time before he walked over to his wardrobe and decided to revisit his roots.
An hour later, he stood in front of the Mehra Mansion, his expression grim. He knew that all of them had gone for a puja and Ishaani was the only one who stayed back because she didn't feel well enough. He rang the doorbell slowly, his fingers growing numb and his vision getting blurred. A minute later, the main door opened and Ranveer was relieved to see Ishaani at the door. Ishaani on the other hand, gasped and clasped her hands over her mouth.
Ranveer stood in front of her not as RV in his dapper suit, but instead as Ranveer in a simple blue-coloured checks-shirt and a pair of jeans. In that moment, Ishaani might have been thrown into the past, with Ranveer getting home late in the night, completely intoxicated under the influence of local alcohol.
Ishaani recoiled behind at the sight of him, as Ranveer advanced towards her slowly. Ishaani knew that Ranveer was heavily drunk from her past experiences, yet she remained surprised that he could still walk straight. Somehow, Ishaani felt more afraid than she had ever felt in her life, as Ranveer's eyes met her own. There was a strange look about the was his eyes looked, a look that she had only seen once before - the time when he was shot.
There was an eerie, dead look about his eyes, as though Ranveer's eyes projected a dead shadow of his former self. Gone was the glint from them and the mischievous twinkle it had and with it only came a dead, decayed look. Ishaani felt a strong pang of pain hit her heart at Ranveer's broken sight, while her voice could barely cross over a frightened whisper.
"Why are you here, Ranveer?" Ranveer smiled at her, a smile more ghostly than real, while Ishaani felt her breath get hitched. Ranveer's eyes met her own in a distant appeal while she stared at him, terrified.
"I have come to ask you a favour." Ishaani looked at him suspiciously while Ranveer stared at her simply.
"What kind of favour?"
"A final one." Ranveer's words echoed in Ishaani's ears for several minutes, an ominous feeling overcoming her now.
"Why me?" The words slipped from her lips childishly and Ranveer gave her a painful look, his eye letting a tear of blood slip.
"Because you're my first and only friend who knows me for what I truly am. It had to be you." Ishaani stared at him fearfully, regret and guilt pounding through her heart brutally while she could feel death looming around them.
"What is it? What is it you want me to do?" Ranveer slowly removed a dagger from his pocket and Ishaani let out an involuntary shriek. The house way deserted, expect for the two of them. Ishaani backed away from him steadily, while Ranveer stared at the dagger absent-mindedly.
He slowly walked ahead while Ishaani kept recoiling, until her back hit a wall. She stared at Ranveer, unsure of what he would do while her eyes stared beseechingly into his own, trying to read them somehow. Ranveer only gave her a blank look in return.
"I want you to kill me."
Ishaani felt stunned as the words rang about her in rapid succession and she stared at Ranveer, her eyes disbelieving at what she just heard and her heart beating irregularly.
"Have you gone mad?! Ranveer, what is wrong with you?! Stop talking stuff like that?! Please!"
She knew that her pleading was falling over deaf ears. Ranveer in turn, simply pulled her hand forward and placed the dagger on it.
"Ishaani, I'm tired. Tired of dying every single day. Tired of dying whenever I see you every single day. I love you and I believed you loved me too, if not in that way, then atleast as my best friend. But I was wrong. You don't. I don't understand you anymore. Ishaani, you wear that ring everyday, yet you claim to hate me. You kiss me like there is no tomorrow, yet you still tell me that I was only ever your driver's son. You want me to stay away from you, yet you keep pulling me back at you after you've pushed me away. I'm tired. Tired of hurting this bad. I'm tired of being a coward who waited forever. I'm tired of making so many promises to people, knowing that I can never fulfill them. I'm tired of trying to move on. I can't because you have the remains of my shattered heart. So please Ishaani, just stab me and end it for me once and for all. I don't want to live such kind of a life anymore. You once gave me back my life when I didn't want to live, this time just take it away. Just do it Ishaani, please. If not for anything else, then atleast for old time's sake."
Ishaani stared at Ranveer aghast, feeling as though someone had run a dagger through her heart with every single word that he spoke. Ishaani could hear the hopelessness and despair in his voice for his sufferings to be ended, but she felt stricken. She stuttered for a few times before she shook her head, tears flowing from her eyes freely.
"Ranveer, you need to go home."
"I know." Ishaani caught on to the implied meaning of Ranveer's response and slapped him harshly.
"Stop it! Stop this nonsense right now! You're not thinking straight! What has gotten into you!?"
"I'm tired of being a burden over everyone's happiness. I just want to make this world a better place without me."
"What about Ritika and your child?"
"Ritika will understand. Besides, that child needs a better father than me. Maybe Sharman will do just fine."
"What are you saying?"
"That child isn't mine. It's Sharman's. Since he refused to marry Ritika and give that child his name, I stepped up and did the needful."
"But you never married Ritika?"
"No, I didn't."
Ishaani felt her head spin about her as the latest revelation blew her mind apart. She felt overwhelmed at the thought of how she had destroyed Ranveer and what she had truly given him in return for his love and loyalty.
"Ranveer, I didn't-"
"It doesn't matter to me anymore."
"But I love you!"
"I don't believe you."
"I truly do, Ranveer!"
"No, you don't. I'm your driver's son. You can't love me. Nobody can."
"That's not true!"
"Yes, it is." Ishaani slapped him once more.
"Will you just listen to me!?"
"There is nothing to listen to anymore. I'm done. If you can't fulfill my wish, it's alright. I'll find another way." Ranveer turned his back on Ishaani and made to leave, when she caught his hand and turned him around once again. She bore her eyes into his own pleadingly.
"Ranveer, please! Just listen to me! I never loved Chirag and I never killed him!" Ranveer stared at her blankly and she sighed. She knew that she could no longer hide the truth from him anymore. Seeing that Ranveer's head had begun to droop, she slowly put his hand over her shoulder and led him towards the staircase.
Bringing him over to inside her room, she gently made him lie down while she sat beside him, his hand clasped in her own. She looked at him beseechingly and spoke once again.
"That day when I signed the divorce papers, only one part of our conversation was true. The part where I confessed my feelings to you. That's it. As to why I pushed you away, I couldn't let you suffer because Chirag was my mistake. And there was sufficient evidence about that pointed towards you. I contaminated the crime scene so that the police would arrest me instead of you."
Ranveer gave her a blank look and she looked at his desperately.
"Why didn't you come back to me when your sentence was pardoned?"
"I did want to come back. But then I found out that you were married to Ritika and the two of you had a child on the way. So I decided to stay away from you, since you had finally found happiness in life. But I was stupid! Stupid! I should have come to you and told you everything, but I didn't! I'm sorry! I'm sorry."
Ranveer buried her head over Ranveer's chest, while he simply stared over the ceiling. Separating herself from him, Ishaani looked at him painfully, while he turned his attention towards her.
"It doesn't matter anymore. It's too late."
"No, it isn't! You want proof that I love you? Here it is. I love you." Ishaani gently pressed her lips against him own, and she felt his arms circle around her back. Their lips made fevered contact with each other for a couple of minutes, before she felt Ranveer's lips slacking away. She separated herself from their embrace and saw Ranveer's eyes half-shut.
He looked at her simply and whispered slowly before his eyes shut finally.
"Meri Aashiqui Sirf Tumse Hi."
Ishaani saw his sleeping form and smiled slowly, as she felt herself fall over Ranveer's chest, her own emotional turmoil taking a toll on her. Before she knew it, she felt the calm hand of sleep claim her while her mind felt peaceful than it had in months.
Ishaani felt someone tapping her shoulders swiftly and she opened her eyes irritably, her mind taking much longer to get accustomed to her surroundings than usual. Turning around she saw Shikhar staring at her with confusion, while she mirrored his expression before she realized that someone had caught hold of her hand.
Turning ahead, she realized that Ranveer had caught hold of her hand and was sleeping in the same position that she'd brought him in last night. His grip on her hand was much harder and she tried to pry her hand away but in vain. It was only when she turned to look at his face did she feel her blood freeze.
Ranveer's face had turned a pale white, while his lips were blue and his nose had trickle of blood streaming. He mouth was slightly agape and his hands were as cold as ice. His face had a very strange expression on it that made Ishaani's heart skip several beats at a time. Ishaani felt a scream escape her mouth and felt Shikhar come to her side and stare at Ranveer. Ishaani felt her mind fly into a wave of hysteria as Shikhar finally managed to pull her hand away from his own, while he made her sit on her chair.
"Ranveer. Ranveer, please come back. RANVEER! PLEASE COME BACK! PLEASE! COME BACK!"
Within the next five minutes, the whole room went into a mess as all the family members had entered the room, while Shikhar was trying to revive Ranveer, but in vain. Ishaani felt something within her break, as she saw Mr. Mehra and Shikhar carry Ranveer's body from the room. She sprung up from the chair and yelled on top on her voice, as Kanchan and Krisha both came and caught hold of her.
"Leave him alone! I SAID LEAVE HIM ALONE!" Ishaani felt herself crash on her knees painfully, her heart overcome with pain such like she had never known. She felt someone pat her head as she cried unabashedly, her tears knowing no restrain and her emotions knowing no boundary. Her world was mixed in a fusion of emotions and she had no head or tail of what was happening to her, except that she wanted to be with Ranveer.
Out of the blue, she saw Shikhar's face pop up in front of him and she caught his collar angrily.
"YOU BRING HIM BACK! BRING HIM BACK THIS INSTANT!" Shikhar signaled someone above her shoulder and she had the impression that company was leaving them, but she didn't care.
"Ishaani, I'm sorry. He's no more." Ishaani's anger knew no bound in that moment and she struck his cheek harshly.
"HOW DARE YOU! YOU'RE LYING!"
"Ishaani... I'm sorry." Ishaani gave Shikhar a heart-breaking look and shrieked.
"How am I even alive? That's not possible." Ishaani scanned around the room and her eyes fell over the dagger that was fallen over the side table. Shikhar's eyes travelled up to what Ishaani was seeing and before she could make a lung for it, Shikhar caught her tightly, pinning her arms to her back.
"Don't even think about it."
"You let go of me this instant. I SAID NOW!"
Shikhar kept her restrained and Ishaani kicked and thrashed against his grip for several minutes, before she gave up at long last. She simply let Shikhar embrace her before she felt herself drowning into an eerie black abyss.
A week later:
Ishaani was sitting on the bed, twiddling with the dove ring on her finger when she heard a door knock. She turned her attention towards the door and saw Shikhar standing over there, a letter in his hand. Shikahr entered the room and stood by Ishaani's side before speaking slowly.
"They found out the cause of death. It was a brain haemorrhage. RV didn't stand a chance. Doctors said in the post-mortem report that the alcohol and his steady depression were factors that led on to it."
When Ishaani remained silent, Shikhar spoke softly.
"I've called off the marriage." Ishaani looked up at him and nodded blankly. Shikhar gave her a serious look. "There is no point in getting married to you. Not when you've only ever loved Ranveer." Ishaani looked at him and her lips parted to speak when Shikhar held his head. "I don't need an explanation. I know. It's a shame I found out this late though."
Ishaani gave him an irritated look and he simply handed over a letter to her.
"The doctors found this with Ranveer. It has your name on it." Saying so, he simply nodded his head and left the room, while Ishaani opened the letter slowly. Her eyes brimmed up at the sight of Ranveer's handwriting and she felt a huge lump rise to her throat.
Dear Ishaani,
I know I must be dead if you're reading this letter. If you are indeed reading this letter, then I just want to say sorry. I never meant for things to end this badly between us, but I couldn't help it. You must be wondering why I'm even bothering to write to you when I always keep saying I hate you? I don't hate you Ishaani. How could I ever hate you?
You must be wondering why I'm talking about death so confidently. It's just something you know that's coming for you. I don't know whether you did indeed stab me then or I just died, but death was certain for me, I can tell you that much atleast.
You know, every night I would think to myself - what really did go wrong between us? But then again, I realised that maybe destiny had another plan for us altogether. Maybe we weren't just meant to be. Maybe we were just cross-starred lovers, meant to yearn but never to yield. Who knows?
But I just want to tell you one thing. If the Lord Almighty ever gave me the chance to live this life all over again and fall in love again, I would choose fall in love with you. Every single time.
I just hope that you always remain happy and that my death has freed you from all the bounds that were restraining you. I hope you get all the happiness that you deserve and if so, even my share of untouched happiness.
Yours always,
Ranveer
Ishaani stared at the letter, tears streaming from her eyes openly. She hugged the letter to her heart and shut her eyes in regret. She knew that she had to live the rest of her life with the guilt that she had driven Ranveer to his death. She knew that she had to live every day as she died each day and she knew there was no escape.
This was her sentence for what she had done to Ranveer. She sighed, as she shut her eyes, preparing herself do die over and over again.
Or maybe then again, death was just a dagger away.
I know, I know, this was pretty depressing and pathetic. But don't blame me, this is all the CVs' fault. They've driven me to the edge with all this crap. But now atleast I can update NC with peace and I feel much better too. :)
Constructive criticism will be more than welcome and sorry for any typos! :D :D
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