In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:
On a bag of chips: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special!)
On a packaged dessert:(printed on bottom of the box) Do not turn upside down. (Too late! You lose!)
On packaging for a iron: Do not iron clothes on body. (But wouldn't that save more time?)
On a Children's cough medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery. (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)
On a string of Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only. (As opposed to use in outer space?)
On a food processor: Not to be used for the other use. (Now I'm curious.)
On a packaged peanuts: Warning: contains nuts. (Really???)
On an Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. (I'm glad they cleared that up...)
On a childs superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly. (That's right, destroy a universal childhood fantasy!)
In a Laundromat : Automatic washing machines. Please remove all your clothes when the light goes out.
In an office: Would the person who took the step ladder yesterday please bring it back or further steps will be taken.
Quicksand Warning : Quicksand. Any person passing this point will be drowned. By order of the District Council.
Seen during a Conference: For anyone who has children and doesn't know it, there is a day care on the first floor.
Notice in a Field: The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the bull charges.
On a Repair Shop Door : We can repair anything (Please knock hard on the door - the bell doesn't work)
On some frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost. (But it's *just* a suggestion!)
On a sleep aid Warning: may cause drowsiness. (One would hope!)
Geet - Hui Sabse Parayee
Advocate Anjali Awasthi
