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He muffled a yawn as his thumb kept on pressing the button on remote to change the channels.Latest Item number from his newly released film was being played on all the Music channels.Channels reporters were telling first day "collection" of the movie in "Crores" where as "Critics" were busy giving their expert comments about "RK's "performance in the movie. He finally switched off the television as he checked time on his watch. There was still one hour left for Madhu to return.She was busy enjoying his latest movie in some theatre and here he was fighting alone with boredom and anxiety of knowing her "views" about his performance in the movie.It was her opinion which matters to him most..He traced his fingers on her face in their wedding picture kept on the side table as memories of best day in his life started playing in his mind like a reel. They had chosen a small temple in a distant village as their marriage venue to avoid all the media.Privacy of this marriage was Madhu's wish and she still had maintained it.She had never flaunted herself as a Super star's wife.She rarely came to sets of his films.She never attended any award functions with him.In this time when print media does not hesitate to make a news about a filmstar's dog,she had kept herself safe from flashes of paparazzi's cameras.There were very few closed relatives and friends of RK who knew his wife by her face.
"Why don't you like to be seen with me while whole world is ready to die for a hand shake with me???" He had asked her once in disappointment.
"I don't want to lose my normal life,Rishabh..I don't want to lose the bliss of eating "Matka kulfi" and "golgappe" from the street vendors.I don't want to be "RK's" wife..I just want to be "Rishabh's" wife.." She had told him with a smile.
He kept the photo frame back at the side table as his gaze fell on his "Journal".Madhu used to argue with him every night to tell her what did he write every night in this journal.A smile crept across his lips as he wondered,despite being so curious about the journal,she never tried to read the contents in his absence. He picked up the journal as his feet moved towards his study table to fill today's entry...
Dear Biwi...
You always want to know what do i write in this journal whom you fondly call your "sautan"..Well,this journal has each and every thing that I wanted to say to you but could never do so.Yes,RK,the famous hero,who can speak pretty long dialogues without a fumble infront of camera, get short of words everytime He tries to say something to his wife.
Madhu..Today someone asked me,What is more difficult-"To get the success???" Or "To maintain it???" After thinking alot ,I have concluded that,"Getting success is hard,Maintaining it is harder but "Handling the success" is the hardest. My works makes me spend my entire day surrounded by "Wheedling"..It is like an open invitation for "conceit" to capture my conscience and make my feet leave the ground.I had felt haughtiness attacking me so many times but You were always there to save me..
Amidst the unnecessary praises of my good looks and body by girls,When I start feeling myself as a "Greek God",You reminds me that My smile is not perfect and "Make up can do wonders".
Amidst the sugary comments of my mad fanatics,You never let me forget the bitter truth that "Success is Fickle".
Its all because of You that despite shooting for marriage sequences for several times for my Films,I was able to feel the happiness when I actually got married.
Its all because of You that My tears glands are still active and I can feel the difference between real tears and tears caused by "Glycerine".
When flashes of camera blinds me and Poking mikes irritates me,I make myself remember that your "embrace" is the place where I would be saved from all these.
When My head starts to hurt in formulating the suitable "diplomatic" answers,knowing very well how my each word would be dissected, I make myself remember that I can blabber anything to you without the fear of being judged.
When I get angry by useless bashing in the name of criticism...When I feel like a "Public Property"seeing people giving their opinions about my personal life,You tell me that Its the price one has to pay for "Fame"..
When "Fear of loosing this success and fame" does not let me sleep at night,Your presence soothes me and your fingers caressing my hair assure me that no matter what,you would always there with me...
When I need someone to give me unbiased and honest opinion about my work and acting, I know Its only "You"...
In the world outside,where everything from what I wear to what I eat is judged,I can be just "Me" with you,Biwi...!!! Thank you so much for coming in to my life as well as accepting me in your life and Thank you for making me capable of handling this "Success"..!!
He closed the journal as he heard her footsteps approaching towards the room.She entered the room as Air got filled with symphony created by chime of her bangles and anklets.
"Welcome back,Biwi." He spoke as he found her giving him a hug."So how was the movie???" He asked further..
"Good.." She said with a smile as she knew what he was going to ask further.
"and how was my performance???"He asked like an impatient kid.
"You were also good But..."
"You know how much I hate this BUT of yours..." He whined as he prepared himself for listening to his flaws in her words.He had always claimed to hate this "But" but deep down his heart,He knew,It was her "But" which had made him work better than previous every time..It was her "But" which hadn't let his career to reach the saturation yet.The day this "But" wouldn't be there, He would not have much left to do with his acting...!!!!
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My previous works on Rk- madhubala..
Ghum Hai Kisikey Pyaar Meiin
