DESTINY'S COURSE chap 8 parts 1&2 updtd 1/6 page 130 - Page 78

Hi guys sorry about the delay.

Ran into some technical difficulties. Then had a major bout of laziness.

Chapter 7

***8 Weeks Later***

Nidhi stood in their room thinking back to that night, and all that had happened after. She sighed, feeling weary beyond words. So much had happened since then, and yet so little. She and Ashutosh were barely on speaking terms. Both avoiding each other as much as possible. Unless of course, they were in the company of Ashutosh's father and aunt. Then just for their sakes, they both tried to act as normal as possible.

Everything had changed since that night almost 2 months ago. She had been so distraught that she had ended up saying some unforgivable things to Ashutosh that night. And even though he might never be able to forgive her for it, she could not find it within herself to feel any remorse for what she had done. It was due to everything that had transpired, that she had learned Ashutosh wanted her. Although that fact was of little comfort. Because, after that that 4-5 day period, he had not so much as looked at her, or touched a hair on her head. She knew that he still wanted her because of the way he looked at her sometimes, when he thought she would not notice. Or, in the way his hand trembled, whenever he was forced to, or sometimes had accidentally touched her in any way. Then there were times at night, when he was asleep and would inadvertently turn to her and reach out for her, or put his arm around her. Although he would almost always wake up the next moment and turn away from her again.

She remembered how nervous she had been wearing that skimpy night gown. It had clung to her curves, and had left no room for any sort of modesty, and had taken every bit of courage, and then some, for her to go out like that in front of him... And though he had rejected her at first, later on had made love to her passionately, the whole night through in fact, hardly letting her get any sleep. He had not needed any words to show her how wrong she had been in thinking that he was indifferent towards her. After that time, no matter what other problems or issues existed between the two of them, his lovemaking during those 5 nights had left no doubt in her mind regarding that one issue, at least. But since then he had stayed away. And no matter how she longed to ask, she just could not find the courage to question him about why he was staying away from her. She had said too much already, and that, she suspected, had a lot to do with his attitude. His cold demeanor ever since, left little doubt that he was not in any mood for even the slightest indulgence for anything she would have to say. She knew that she had been grossly unfair, and had judged him harshly. But there was no way she could take her words back.

***8 weeks earlier...*.**

"Dr. Ashutosh..."

Ashutosh swallowed several times, and blinked his eyes trying to focus, as he stared at her. His throat was clogged, and he was finding it difficult to articulate, so his

"Nidhi?..." came out harsher than he would have liked.

That she was clearly uncomfortable, and very embarrassed, was also very obvious. Ashutosh did not know how to react. He was torn. Should he get annoyed at her for thinking that she had to wear something like that to try and attract him. To dress in a manner that went against her sensibilities and made her uncomfortable. Or, should he be amused at her innocence and naivety in thinking that it could make him want her if he saw her in something so decadent? She had a lot to learn, he thought, about the ways of the world and men, him in particular. She could be wearing a potato sack, and he would want her just as much. Ashutosh wondered what she would do, how she would react if he went with what his gut was saying. It telling him to grab her, tear the sorry excuse for clothing she had on, and have his way with her right then and there.

So while he was lost in his thought fantasizing about make love to her, Nidhi mistook his silence to mean something else altogether, and her thoughts took her in a completely different direction.

She had hoped that seeing her in a provocative negligee might get his attention, and had been really nervous about wearing something so daringly revealing. She had never worn clothes like that before in her life. She had gotten the idea from Pryianka, one of her friends, and also a colleague at KGH. They had been having lunch together, when she had offhandedly asked her if she had any ideas on how to seduce your husband. husband. She had been very hestant, and skeptical at first, but Priyanka had encouraged her, telling her that there was nothing wrong in a wife trying to seduce her husband. She had pointed out that there was nothing to feel shy about, after all her husband knew what she look like without clothes, didn't he? And doing things like that from time to time, and surprising each other only added spice to relationship, and kept it fresh. Well, she had been wrong, and Nidhi made a mental note to herself, vowing never to go any of her married friends for advice on the art of seduction, or advice on marriage. After all what did they know. Their marriages were normal ones. Not ones based on a contract of convenience.

Nidhi sighed, as she looked at Ashutosh, who stood there looking at her with his face devoid of all expression, and bit her lower lip, not at all sure what to do next. How could she get pregnant if he could not even bring himself to touch her, she thought desperately, and also quite a bit of self righteous indignation caused by embarassement. At the same time her heart was also breaking at his indifference. But then she reasoned, "Hadn't he had made love to her in Mahabaleshwar. In fact, he had been very passionate. So he could not be totally indifferent. He must desire her at least a little, on some scale. Right?" She reasoned to herself. Thinking back to that night, re remembered that he had made love to her 2-3 times that night. Well,( she , admitted, and smiled sheepishly correcting herself), one of those times it had been at her instigation. But each time being better and more magical than the last. ot so she had assumed. It had been, for her at least. And at the time, no matter what he had said in front of Arman, she had thought that Ashutosh had felt the same. Nidhi blushed just thinking about their lovemaking, and all the things he had done to her, and with her.

Each day her love and yearning for him was growing, making it more and more difficult for her to even think of a life without him. But she knew that she would have too. As soon as she gave him the child he wanted, he would expect her to fulfill her part of their bargain, and leave. But for that to happen she first needed to get pregnant, and quickly. Because the more time it took, the longer she would have to stay with him. The pain that even the thought of separation brought, was almost too bear. She needed to get away from him as quickly as possible, because each delay made it that much harder. At some point she would have to start a new life, and she could not do that until she gave him the child that he wanted. Maybe, she thought wryly, she should start giving a serious thought to the option of IVF, as they had discussed in the beginning... For now, however, she was not willing to even consider that alternative as anything other than a last resort. And also, she was honest enough to admit to herself that she wanted his lovemaking, craved it even.

At the end of the contract, when she left him, he would have his child, their child, but Nidhi new that all she would have would be the memories of their time together. So what was the big deal if she wanted to have a few more nights, like the last ones. That didn't mean that she was greedy or selfish, it just meant that she was a woman in love. So what if she wanted to collect all the memories that she possibly could? They would be all she had of him once she left, she would have to make them last her a lifetime. What else could she do, she was desperate. In that respect she was like her father. Just as her mother had been the only one for him, Ashutosh was the only one for her. And as long as she lived there would never be anyone else for her. Never, not in her life, nor in her heart. Not in this lifetime.

Nidhi had already decided that she would leave the house to their baby. She wanted their child to spend his childhood here, and grow up in the same place up where his mother had. Every nook and cranny of this house was was filled with happy memories, and love, and a whole lot of laughter. Memories of her parent's, their love for one another, their love for her, and memories of her childhood. She hoped that he would be able to feel her presence , and somehow, deep inside, know that she loved him no matter how far away she was.

Nidhi looked up at Ashutosh once again, bracing herself, and gathering up all her courage. Then, taking the proverbial bull by the horns, she walked up to him and put her arms around his neck, and stood on her toes, reaching up, she pulled his head down to hers so that their lips touched. But the next second, she was startled when he roughly freed himself from her arms, and stepped away and said harshly, not even bothering to look in her direction,

"It's late Nidhi, and, I have a major surgery scheduled for the morning. I need to wake up early to get to the hospital on time. And I still need to read the case file. Mujhe der ho jayegi. Tum So jao... Hum...(he cleared his throat). Hum kal baat karenge"

She watched, stunned, as he walked away from her, and left the room, closing the door quietly after himself. She did not know what had just happened, but what little hope she had had left regarding their relationship, had just been smashed into a million pieces. Nidhi walked slowly to a near by chair and sat down. She stared blindly out into the night, trying to comes to terms with the message that Ashutosh had conveyed silently, but nonetheless very clearly. He did not want her!!!!! Nidhi shivered at the slight breeze that was coming from the open doors, and rubbed her arms in an effort to bring some warmth. And when her hands went automatically, to pull the edges of her robe together in an effort to ward off the chill, she realized that she did not have it on. It was then that she remembered she had not put it on. She got up slowly and went to change...

Downstairs, in his father in-laws study, and at Nidhi's request now his, Ashutosh sat at the desk with his head resting on his arms, as he cursed himself to hell and back, knowing that he had hurt her, and had, in all likelihood, driven an even bigger wedge between them. But, he had been helpless! He had seen her face as she had reached up to kiss him. She had looked like a child with her eyes all closed tight, and her mouth scrunched, as if she were being forced to take some medicine that she knew was going to taste bad, and preparing herself for it. So, he had done the only thing possible...at least the only thing that he could think of at that moment. He had made an excuse and left.

Ashutosh slowly lifted his head and stared at the photo of Col. Verma's photo that hung on the wall opposite the desk.

"Mai Kya karoon Baba? Kaise aapki beti ko yakeen dilaun ke mai uss se pyar karta hoon? How do I untangle this mess? I know that all this is my doing, and I have to figure a way out of it myself, but I don't know how. Every passing day puts more distance between the two of us. I love her and I myself am pushing her away from me. Baba please help me."

He said and rubbing a hand over his tired eyes.

Ashutosh looked up at the knock on his door. He knew it was Nidhi, and he sighed wearily as he softly bade her to come in. As she came hesitantly into the room, and he saw that she had changed into a churidaar kurta. Her hands were twisting and untwisting her dupatta nervously, and though she tried her best to smile and cover it up, her eyes were full of hurt and pain. It killed him to know that he had put both there. He also noted that she stood as far away as she could, keeping her distance. Ashutosh stood up slowly, but the moment he took a step towards her, she stepped back, conveying more than words ever could the damage his rejection had done. Ashutosh abrupt;y turned away from her and went to stand in front of the window his hands going up to tightly clasp the window bars.

"Did you want something Nidhi?"

"Jee...I wanted to ...that is aap bura na maane toh aapse kuch baat karni thi. Agar aapke paas waqt ho toh..."

"Waqt toh nahin hai, par koi baat nahin. Par tum aa hi gayi ho toh bolo, what is on your mind?"

Ashutosh did not know what perverse streak had made him talk so rudely to her, when all he wanted to do was go and fall down on his knees and beg her forgiveness, and declare his love, but it seemed that his mouth had a mind of its own.

"It's...it's regarding our contract."

"What about it?" He really needed a muzzle, he thought.

"Well...I want...actually app...I mean...I need..."

"Nidhi, just spit it out. Jo kehna hai kaho."

Ashutosh said as calmly as he could, given that at the moment his patience was at an all time low.

For the first time in his life he was in a situation over which he had no control, not to mention the fact that he was in love with a girl half his age, who happened to be his wife. The woman he had married under contract to be a surrogate for the child he had wanted. The whole scenario sounded as if was from some awful B grade bollywood movie. And the fact that he wanted her badly was helping matters any, either. He was hard, and his manhood was throbbing. His body was demanding release ever since he had seen her in that nightgown. All in all, with everything put together, he had not had any time to get his act together. And now, with her standing there looking so beautiful and innocent... His fingers curled tighter until the whites of his knuckles were showing.

His derogatory tone, along with his earlier rejection, made her hackles rise, and her pride kicked into gear. Nidhi straightened up, and angrily wiped the tears from her cheeks,

"I was wanting to know how you would like to proceed with our contract. Aapne toh apna part pura kar diya, ab meri baari hai. I too, would like to fulfill my part as quickly as I can."

Ashutosh squeezed his eyes at the pain her words caused,

"Itni jaldi bhi kya hai Dr. Nidhi. You know that it will be at least year before your end of the contract is fulfilled. That is if you get pregnant right away. And there is no guarantee of that."

"Yes Sir, I know that. I also know that pregnancy doesn't happen by itself. As far as I am aware, there has only been one case of divine conception. And since I do not meet that criteria, as I am neither a saint, nor a virgin, it's not likely to happen in my case. That's what I was referring too."

Ashutosh smiled at that. Apparently his little mouse, was finally showing her claws. Good for you, he cheered her silently. He was glad to here the fight back in her voice. Her feisty, and vivacious nature, and the sparkle in her eyes, were some of the things that had attracted him to her in the first place. All of that had been missing since they had gotten married. Not to mention her beauty, innocence, and compassion. Ashutosh was glad she had answered him back. He was aware that he had treated abominably right from the start. First with the contract, and then with his superior, holier than thou attitude. He had thought that he was doing her a huge favor, by marrying her and taking care of her troubles, and only asking her to have his baby in return. As if having a baby was no big deal. In his arrogance he had thought that all he was asking for was a year out of her life, after which she would be free. Free to live as she wanted, and how she wanted, without any financial burden ( which of course he would have seen too). He had been so blind, and arrogant. The truth of the matter was that it was just the reverse, it was she who had been doing him the favor. He had done nothing. He knew that if the situation had become desperate, Nidhi would have been more than capable of taking care of her father, just as well, maybe even better, than he had. Of course she would have had to face some difficulties, but he knew that it would not have been anything she would not have been able to overcome. All he had had to contribute was a bit of time, and money. But Nidhi was having to contribute one year of her life, and also having to go through a life altering experience. And she had done all this for her father. She had been willing to give him a child. There could be no greater gift than that. Not only that, she was now taking care of his parents as well. In fact, he thought, that she had more for them in the short period they had been married, than he had in all his life. At the same time she had also taught him to live again, and taught him how to love, and to feel. Basically she had turned him into a human being again, one that he had been once, a long time ago. Oh yes! He definitely had gotten the better end of the deal.

"I know what you are referring to, Dr Nidhi. But what are you trying to say?"

Nidhi took a deep breath,

"What I am trying to say DR. ASHUTOSH SIR, is that maybe we should consider the IVF, alternative."

Ashutosh turned around slowly to face her,

"I thought that you did not want that."

Nidhi lowered her eyes,

"I don't. But I don't think that I have any other choice. I mean how else..."

She trailed off, being unable to continue.

" How else, what?"

She once again raised her head, her eyes spitting fire,

"Dr. Ashutosh are you joking? How can you ask me that? How can you stand there in front of me and pretend that you don't know what I am talking about?"

"That is because I am not pretending Nidhi. I really don't know what you are trying to say. If you are referring to tonight, then..."

"Of I am referring to tonight." She cut him of angrily.

"And also to what I overheard you say to Arman Bhai. What else would I be referring too? Or...is there anything else? I mean with you I never know. You say one thing in front of me, and another behind my back."

Ashutosh did not like her accusation, nor did he like the contempt that was creeping up into her voice.

"What the hell do you mean by that? Are you implying that I am a liar? That I have deceived you in some way?"

"Yes! Well No... That is... I mean in a way you did."

Now his voice was deceptively soft, and it sent shivers of warning down her spine. But the next instant she threw caution to the winds. She was going to have her say tonight. She had been keeping things bottled up inside for a long time, and now that she had started she wanted to see things through, no matter what the consequences. After all what could he do to her? She thought rebelliously.

"Dr. Nidhi Verma, I might be all sorts of things but I am not a liar, nor have I ever been dishonest or misled anybody in my life, about anything. I have never said anything to you which I did not ever mean. Shuru se hi I have been upfront with you..."

Nidhi cut him off,

"If that is the case then all the things you said in front of Arman, you should have told me directly to my face. Of course I would not have liked it, and it would have hurt, but at least I would still have some respect for you. But you could not do that, could you? No, you just..."

"Nidhi (he said even more softly, walking up to her and looking her straight in the eyes) I would strongly advise that you to drop this matter right here and now. I don't think you realize just what a narrow and dangerous path you are walking on right now. Maybe you should take a while to calm down and think before you say anything . Hmmm? Kahin aisa na ho ke mai..."

He stopped abruptly and turned around again, facing away from her, trying to get himself, and his temper under control, before he did or said something they both would regret.

"Kahin aisa no ho ke app kya, Dr. Ashutosh? What? Aap kya karenge. Mujh se baatein karna band kar denge? Woh toh waise bhi aap nahin karte, so no biggie there. Ya mere upar gussa karenge? At least that will be be something. Nahin toh all I get from you is indifference. Ya phir mujhe meri job se nikaal denge? But usske liye aapko Baba ko jawab dena hoga, aur woh aap de nahin sakenge. Kyon ke unhe sach toh bol nahin sakte, right? Huh? Kya karenge aap? And Ghar se bhi toh nahin nikaal sakte, kyon ke ghar toh mera hai. So, aur kya karenge? Meri taraf dekhna band kardenge. Usski toh naubat tab aayegi na, jab aap meri taraf dekhenge, which you never do anyway. And what else...let me see...is there anything else? Yes there is one thing. Aap mere se door rahenge, mujhe chhuna band kardenge. Well there is no danger of that happening either, is there? When you have a problem even looking in my direction, how are you going to bring yourself to touch me. You have made it clear that I am not your type, and are not the slightest bit interested in me that way. Isn't that right? Isn't that what you said to your friend? That the only interest you have in me is that I am a means for you to get the child that you are so desperate for. Isn't that a laugh? Dr. Ashutosh, the only way you are going to have that child is through me. So I am left with no other choice but to conclude that your aversion for me is stronger than your desire for your child. Or maybe you have found someone else. Is that it? Have you found another surrogate. Someone that you like better. Someone whom you don't mind making love with. Are looking for a polite way to get rid of me. Because if..."

Ashutosh whirled around in fury, and grabbed her shoulders,

"Nidhi, you need to stop right now. You have no idea what you are saying. I am warning you..."

SHe gave a little hysterical laugh, and roughly shrugged out of his hold.

"Warning me...you? That's a cute. Dr. Ashutosh you should have warned me before, about what I was getting into. You want to know something really ironic. Before all of this, the marriage and everything, I used to really admire you, look up to you. I used to feel on top of the world at the slightest praise from you. I used to wait for you to smile at me, cause that meant my whole day would go right. The day you asked me to marry you, just so that you could help me...well I can't tell you what your help and support meant to me, and how much that raised your level in my estimation. Then the way you took care of Baba...seeing to his every comfort spending time with him, staying up nights taking care of him...well it made you a paragon in my eyes. I was beginning to worship the ground you walked on. I began weaving a foolish dream around you for the future, my future. I stupidly thought that we might have one together. For a brief period I thought we could get past that damned contract. I was beginning to fall in love with you, you see..."

"Nidhi..."

Ashutosh turned around and took a step towards her, but stopped when she held out her hand,

"No! No! Please don't, don't say anything. Today I need to talk. And for God's sake, don't come near me. I don't want you anywhere close to me. Dr. Ashutosh the day I heard you talk to Arman. The day I heard what you really felt about me, and your reasons for helping me and then your passing off your care of my father as something you would do for any tom dick or harry... Well, the blinders came off and I came crashing down to earth. But, the fool that I am, I thought I could handle that. After all we had a contract, and no matter why you did it, you had helped me tremendously, at a time when I needed someone by my side, the most. You had made my father's last days happy, and let his soul be at peace when he died. But today the way you walked out on me, the way you treated me... you made me feel like I was nothing. The way you looked at me...It took a lot of courage on my part to come in front of you like that. You know how you made me feel...the way you shrugged me off and walked away...You made me feel as if I was cheap. Like someone off the street that you pay to get..."

"THAT'S ENOUGH NIDHI!!!! JUST SHUT THE HELL UP!!!"

"Why? Why should I?"

"Because you have no idea what you are saying. I understand that you are upset, and I am trying to make allowances for that. But..."

"You are making allowances... That's rich! Well Please don't do me any favors Sir! I don't need anything from you. I always thought that the name "HeartStone" was a case of sour grapes, on someone's part. But I see that who ever christened you with that title, must have had a very good reason to do so. Your heart really is made of stone. Your do not care about how anyone feels. Dr. Ashutosh the least you could have done, instead of humiliating me the way you did earlier tonight, was maybe, to have the decency to tell me yourself that you did not want to have any kind of a physical relationship with me. Now that I think about it, I think that even what happened between us last last month must have been an aberration on your part, it was all so totally unnecessary. What were you trying to prove anyway, and to whom? Making love to a woman you did not desire..."

Her hysterical tirade was effectively cut of by Ashutosh as he pulled her roughly into his arms, and brought his mouth down on hers savagely. She had been startled at first, and then struggled in protest, but he had used his superior strength, to keep her pinned against himself. When he was sure that he had made his point, and she had stopped stuggling, he lifted his face and looked down at her. Nidhi saw the fury on his face, and noted that the same was also reflected in his eyes. She trembled under the force of his anger, scared at what she had unleashed, but at the same time she was excited by it. And his voice, when he spoke, sent shivers up her spine,

"Not want you...isn't that what you were saying? Well you have had your say DR. NIDHI. Your time is up! It's my turn now, so just keep quiet and do not, I repeat, DO NOT utter a single word. Just listen. Aberration totally unnecessary, isn't that what you called our lovemaking!!! How dare you? Are you blind? Can't you see what staring you right in the face? Can't you feel it? Or are you dumb along with being blind? Not Want You!!!!! I want you so much it is killing me. And that nonsense you were spouting about other women. What other women, Dr. Nidhi? I am so twisted around by wanting you all the time, all I see is you. There are no other women. At least no that I can see. So, for the record, I DO NOT WANT ANYONE ELSE!!! I WANT YOU!!! ONLY YOU!!! It that clear enough for you. Do you get it, or would you like me to shout it from the roof top, or maybe put up a bill board saying Dr. Ashutosh, wants Dr. Nidhi. Well? Is that what you want? ( He said shaking her with each word, trying to drive his point home.) The reason I left was, because seeing you in that...like that... Seeing you standing there in front of me wearing something that left practically nothing to the imagination,...it was like you had just stepped out of one of my fantasies... I was shaken to the core. I didn't mean to make you feel cheap or any other thing that your over active mind had managed to come up with. I was protecting you. If I had stayed even a moment longer, I'd have ripped that thing off you and been inside you within seconds. Nidhi I wanted to take you right there on the ground, like some rutting animal. And had I stayed I would have done just that, without preliminaries, without any thought to your feelings or your well being. Dear God Woman, you have no idea how much I wanted you at that moment. I did not want to scare you...to take you so callously that it might scar you for life. You know what the word for that is Nidhi? Its an ugly word. One with which I never want to associate myself, or you. I also, didn't want to add another sin to my already ever growing list, so I left you and came down here, to try and get a grip on myself. Besides I want a woman who wants me. I don't want a child dressed up, pretending to be a woman. A child who comes to me with her face all scrunched up as if she is about to be forced to take medicine that she knows will taste bitter. So rather than do something I knew I would later regret, I left. But you could not leave it alone, could you? You came after me. I tried to warn you to leave me alone, to give me time so I could get myself under control, but you didn't listen. And now it is too late. Now you are responsible for what is about to happen. But you have achieved something little girl . You wanted a reaction out of me, right? Well you succeeded. You are going to get one. I don't care if it's not one you wanted. And, whatever else you might think of me afterwards, I promise you will never doubt my desire for you ever again."

Saying that, Ashutosh once again crushed her against himself, and brought his mouth down on top of hers. There was no gentleness or even a thought for any consideration for her, as he forcefully thrust his tongue inside with punishing force, ruthlessly plundering her mouth, devouring her with an intensity and desperation that shook her to the core. Then before she could react, or respond, he swung her up into his arms and started walking towards the door.

Nidhi came to her senses,

"Yeh app kya kar rahein hain? Baba, Bhua...?"

He spared her a brief glance as he continued carrying her up the stairs without breaking his stride.

"You should have thought of that earlier. You are my wife, I married you in front of the world didn't I? So what if they see us. They both know the facts of life, and I am sure they will not mind."

The steel and anger in his tone stopped any further arguments from her, but she did not breath easy until they were inside their room.

Ashutosh kicked the door closed softly with his feet. Then, keeping his eyes on her face, he lowered her so that she could stand. Nidhi squirmed under the intensity of his gaze, and finally unable to bear it any longer, she turned and made to walk away only to find her self caged in by a pair of strong arms.

Ashutosh pulled her close, and tightened his arms around her painfully, not caring that he was hurting her with his sheer strength. He was past any reasonable thoughts at that moment, his mind devoid of anything except the need to possess. He swooped down and captured her mouth in another searing kiss, which had her toes curling. She hardly had any time to even catch her breath, as he started running his hand all over her, trying to get access to her body. But unlike earlier, this time she was well and truly covered from head to toe, frustrating him even further.

He lifted his face,

"Are you particularly fond of this dress?"

Nidhi looked at him puzzled.

"Nnnooo...I mean it's comfortable, so I wear it at night. That's why I like it."

"That was not my question Nidhi. I asked you if you liked this dress, and wanted to keep it."

"Keep it?"She repeated, even more confused as to where this was leading and why he was asking her something so strange.

"No. I mean if I were to loose it tomorrow, or something happened to it, I would not care. But why..."

"Aah."He said, "that's what I needed to know. " he said cutting her off.

Then his voice thickened, "Sorry about this'"

And without further warning he ripped the shirt of her churidaar, from neckline to hem, making Nidhi realize exactly why Ashutosh had asked her about the dress. She was not given any time for even a thought to modesty as Ashutosh quickly dispensed with the rest of her clothing. And once he had all her clothes off, he impatiently flung off his own. Nidhi barely had time enough to register they were both naked, because, as soon as he was done, Ashutosh reached out hauled her against himself, groaning in pleasure at the feel of her skin against his. He ran his hands feverishly all over her, raining kisses on her face, and down her neck. Taking time to take a little nip here and there, meanwhile going back again and again to her mouth.

Nidhi was reeling from his onslaught, all earlier misconceptions about him not wanting her, flying out the window. Oh yes, he wanted her alright, she realized, she could feel his desire throbbing, and pressing with a desperate urgency against her . It sent joy coursing through her, as she wound her arms around him, holding him tight, encouraging him to keep on going.

Ashutosh was a like a man possessed, his fierceness both frightening her as well as building up an unknown anticipation within. He once again picked her up in his arms,

"kahan le jaa rahein hain?"

"Jahan aaj shyam ko tum mere samne aayi thi, demanding my attention. I was wanting to do to you then, exactly what I am doing and am going to do right now. Outside. On the balcony, underneath the stars."

"But...That's...That's out in the open...What is someone..."

"Koi nahin hai bahar. Raat ho gayi hai, and ghar par bhi sab so gaye hain. Now stop talking. Remember, I told you not to say anything. I am going to show to exactly how much I do not want or desire you."

He walked out into the night and lay her down on the soft grass and then came down beside her. But strangely enough he did not touch her, instead, propped himself on one arm, and stared at her for several moments. Nidhi looked at him, was unable to tell what he was thinking or feeling. She only saw a strange glint in his eyes. And, before she could ask him why he was looking at her like that, he reach out with his free hand and ran his fingers from the top of her head, all the way to her kness. Nidhi shivered at the trail of fire that his fingers left in their wake. Then with out any warning he rose up and moved on top of her ,covering her body with his own.

You are so beautiful." Ashutosh whispered. His voice going husky with desire and she saw that his eyes had taken on a menacing black hue, as he nudged her legs apart. "Now," he whispered, his fingers fisting in her hair, and he tugged her face out from the crook of his neck staring down into her eyes, "Now! I have to have you right now' "

With that, he lowered his head and kissed her again, as he drove into her, filling her completely, all in one smooth, incredibly erotic move. Innundated by sensation, and aching for him as much he was for her , Nidhi arched against him, drawing him still deeper into her. She wrapped her legs around him, urging himon. Gasping in pleasure she slid her hands along his back, feeling the muscles beneath his skin flex and bunch, and relishing in the freedom to be able to touch him as she wanted. It seemed like forever since the last time they had made love, and she had held him this close to her. She only wished that this moment would go on forever.

The intensity built up and increased between them, with every kiss, every touch growing more frantic. Nidhi gave herself completely over to Ashutosh. And when her mind seemed to blank out and Nidhi let her body take over. Sensations poured through her as his hands caressed every line, every curve. She melted into him, taking everything he offered and giving everything she had, holding him tightly to herself, glorying in his possession as the world exploded around them.

As their heartbeats slowed, and they came back to earth, Nidhi opened her eyes, and stared up at the stars. The sky had never looked more beautiful to her, than it did right now, she thought, as she smiled and ran her hand lovingly down his back in a tender caressing motion.

Ashutosh stirred and raised her face to look at her,

"I didn't hurt you did I?"he asked softly

Nidhi blushed and shook her head, "No... I am fine."

He nodded,"Good." Then moved off of her and stood up, before reaching out to help her up.

As they stood there looking at each other, Nidhi became aware of her state of undress. Blushing, she turned around and hurried into the bedroom, and picked up her torn shirt, which was the first thing she could find to cover herself. Then just as she started to move towards the bathroom she was caught from behind by a pair of strong hands, that turned her around.

"Where do you think you are going?''

She looked at him puzzled,

"I was going to wash up. Kuch chahiye tha aapko?"

Ashutosh brought her closer, and encased her in his arms. He looked into her eyes, and nodded, bringing his face close to hers,

"You..."

Nidhi blushed,

"M..m..me?"

He nodded again,coming closer still,

"Yes you."

"But...but you just...we just..."

"Yes, but that was not enough. Once was not enough. I need you again. Do you have any problems with that Dr. Nidhi."

She lowered her eyes shyly and shook her head silently. Then, she leaned forward, bridging the tiny gap that Ashutosh had left between their mouths.

That was all the indication Ashutosh needed. He swept her up yet again, and carried her over to their bed, dropping the torn shirt she had been trying to cover herself up with, along the way.

**Back to the Present...**

Nidhi closed her eyes, and wrapped her arms around herself, remembering that night. It had been magical. In some ways even more so than their first night together had been. Ashutosh had made love to her tirelessly all night, driving home to her how much he wanted her. He had sought her again and again, making love to her tirelessly, into the wee hours of the morning, before finally fallen into an exhausted sleep in her arms.

Nidhi remembered that she had gotten up the next morning feeling happy, satisfied, and also tired. She had reached out for him sleepily, only to find the bed empty. She had quickly gotten out of bed and had gotten ready in a hurry, and then gone downstairs, only to be disappointed yet again when she had been told by Bhua that out that Ashutosh had already left for the hospital. Nidhi was perplexed. After the night they had spent, she had assumed that things would get better between the two of them. But the opposite had happened. They had gotten worse. She had tried finding him when she got to the hospital, but with one thing or the other Ashutosh had avoided her all day. Even when they had gotten home, he had been quiet, and pled tiredness and a headache as an excuse in front of his parents. Ashutosh had excused himself as soon as dinner was done, and had gone upstairs to their room.

By the time Nidhi got to their room, after finishing all her chores, and seeing to Baba's and Bhua's needs, Ashutosh had been asleep. Or so she had thought. That is until she lay down on the bed. The minute her head had touched the pillow, Ashutosh had turned and pulled her into his arms and then proceeded to make love to her with with a single minded passion that had once again transported her to the heights of pleasure. Although it had lacked the urgency and desperation of the previous evening, his ardor was just as tireless. And once again the day was a repeat of the previous one. Ashutosh had continued reaching for her and making love to her for the next 5 days, which she later realized was the duration of her fertility cycle.

On that last day, she could see his face still, he had been in the room when she woke up. He had come up to her and said,

"Well Dr. Nidhi...I trust you do not have any doubts or complaints about my desires or my performance now. Hopefully we will get lucky and you will get pregnant. But if not, and my services are required again, I trust you will not hesitate to let me know. I realize you want to get on with your life, and probably want to put all this behind you, so I will keep my fingers crossed. For both our sakes."

Then he had turned and walked out of the room, leaving her staring after him.

She had come to realize over the last few days that though he was blunt and ruthless when needs be, he was not a cruel man. The consideration with which he had made love to her, had more than proved that fact. He had always made sure that she got as much pleasure as he did, from their joining. Often times going to the trouble of making sure that she reached her peak right before he did. The way he held her tenderly afterwards... That was why she could not figure out what he was being so deliberately cruel with her.

Basically two months had passed since that time, and he had not so much as said two sentences to her in private, let alone make any attempt to even touch her, unless it was absolutely required of him, and that too only in public. And as for her, well the first month she had spent cursing him to hell for his cold manner, and the next she had spent brooding and coming to the realization that he was not the one who was totally at fault. She had done her bit, and contributed to all the misunderstandings, and tensions between the two of them. Although that did not mean that she was alright with the way he was keeping her at a distance. She knew that he did not love her, but when they had gotten married, he had said that they were friends. There was no evidence of that friendship anymore, anywhere, between the two of them. And the things stood, Nidhi thought to herself, that was probably for the best. This way making a clean break from him would be easier.

She had gotten her period last month, although they had been significantly lighter than norma. Yet that was a clear indication that she was not pregnant. When they were alone that night she had told him, and he had looked up briefly at her from his work, and nodded. Then he told her that she should let him know when her fertile cycle started, and they would try again. But as luck would have it, they she never got the chance. Ashutosh had been called away on an emergency during that time, and had not been able to return home for 10 days. And by the time he had come back, the time for doing anything had passed. He had been offfhand and casual about it, saying that there was always the next month. She had of course been disappointed, as she had been looking forward to spending time in his arms, and making love, but she had also been glad, because that meant that her time with him and his family had been extended by a month, at least.

Nidhi knew that it did not matter to Ashutosh either way, that all he wanted from her was his child. And for her part, she had become resigned to the fact that though he may desire her up to a certain point, beyond that he felt nothing else for her. When she had first realized that she had fallen in love with her temporary husband, the thought of her getting pregnant with their child had elated her. . But later when her hopes that in time Ashutosh would come to have feeling for her also, were dashed, she knew that she could not afford to form any sort of attachment to the child. She would have to view her pregnancy and the child growing within her, clinically .

There would be no more love making. No more sleeping in his arms. Nothing for her to look forward to except a long lonely empty life, with nothing but memories and wishes about what could have been. There would be no further need for his SERVICES, as he called it. Because, apparently Ashutosh's wish had come true. She was pregnant. It had been confirmed by the OB/GYN Doc at KGH. This afternoon, in fact. She had been mistaken last month. She had been spotting, not having her menstrual cycle. Although it was not exactly normal, it was not unheard of, or anything to panic about either. All this meant was that she would have to be a bit more careful, and take some extra precautions until the doctor told her that everything was normal. Some women had very light bleeding in the early stages of their pregnancy. Maybe the first couple of months, or so. The only reason she had gone to the see the doctor was because she had started to feel really tired and run down the last couple of weeks, and had even gotten dizzy a few times, and her appetite had all but disappeared. Anji had seen this and forced her, and although Nidhi had protested, saying it was nothing, in the end had complied. She did it to appease her friend, knowing nothing would come out of it, but wanting to put Anji's mind to rest, just the same. She had thought that she was getting sick, but never in a million years could she have guessed that she was pregnant.

Nidhi sighed, she and Ashutosh were simply not meant to be. She had always sensed that deep down, inside herself. But now, the time had come when she needed to somehow, come to terms with this, and also needed to force herself to accept it. It was a reality that she was pregnant with their...NO. His. His child. And seven months from now, she would deliver HIS baby, and hand it over to him. Then she would have to make herself walk away from the both of them. She would force herself to never look back. And, she would start her own life afresh. There was nothing she could do about this. She had agreed to his terms and had signed a contract knowing very well what he was asking of her. She had gone into this with open eyes.. Ashutosh had more than lived up to his end of the deal, now it was her turn.

That was why she was standing out here tonight. She was feeling as if she were all alone in the world. So, she had come out here to try and get her emotions under control. She had been doing this all her life. Nidhi remembered one time when she had been little, and she had been crying for her mother, her father had taken her little hand into his, and brought her out here. Then he had picked her up and pointed to the shiniest star in the sky and had told her that that was her mother. He also told her that whenever she missed her mother all she had to do was come out here and look up and talk to her. He had said that even though her mother would not be able to answer her, she would be able to hear everything Nidhi had to say, and in her own way, she would do everything she could to help her. Nidhi had taken that advice to heart, and all through her growing years she had had numerous one sided conversations with her mother. And for thee past 3 months also with her father.

Now as she stood gazing up at the two bright stars, that were twinkling down at her side by side, she suddenly felt a strange peace and a sense of warmth and well being come flooding through her. It was as though she was being cocooned in a tender embrace, that was full of love and caring. She felt her parents presence, as if they holding her close and assuring her that everything would be fine. As though they was giving her the courage to face whatever lay ahead, and telling her that she would make it, to not worry, that they were with her no matter what. Nidhi closed her eyes and smiled, giving herself another hug.

"Thank you Baba, Thank you Maa. Thank you both for being here for me. I love you Both and I miss you very much. I promise you, no matter what comes my way, I will be fine. I will not give up on life. I will not become bitter or cynical. I promise. And Baba, like like you, I will keep loving him all my life. Baba mujhe aap dono ka Aashirwaad chahiye so I can get through this."

Nidhi was startled out of her thoughts by the jingle of her cell phone. Nidhi went into her room and sat down on the bed, picking up her phone as she did so. It was Anji. She smiled as the answered,

"Hi Anji."

"Woh sab baad mein stupid, pehle mujhe bataa tune Jeeju ko bataya."

Nidhi shook her head, and chuckled. What she have done without Anji, she wondered. After her Baba, Anji was her only family. She was close to Anji's parents also, but with Anji she shared a very special and unbreakable bond. In fact, she had called and told her the news as soon as she had gotten of the phone with her OB. Anji had been elated, and gave her an " I Told You So". And she was also worried. She knew what Nidhi's pregnancy signified, and had made her promise to tell Ashutosh at the first opportunity. Anji felt that as soon as he found out, he would change and things would get better between them. Nidhi had smiled ruefully at her optimism. And although she herself had no hopes of Ashutosh ever changing, she had not said anything to Anji. She did not want to burst her bubble. That would happen on its own, in due time. It was inevitable.

"Anji tu bilkul pagal hai. Woh sab kya? Maine toh Hi ke illava kuch bhi nahin bola tha."

"Haan haan, main jaanti hoon. Par pehle bataa, tune Jeeju ko news diya?"

"Arre Baba, woh toh abhi tak ghar bhi nahin aaye hain. Maine bataya tha na tujhe, the hospital had a trauma case come into the ER, and Ashutosh was asked do an emergency operation. From what I was told case was really complicated. Who knows when he will get done. And even then, I don't know if he will manage to make it back home tonight. Depending on the state of the patient, he just might have to stay there and be on hand in case he is needed. Par I will tell him as soon as I see him. Pakka."

"Theek hai...Par uske baad ek dum se mujhe call karna, OK. I want to know what his reaction is. Nidhi I am sure baby ke baare mein pataa chalte hi he will change with you also. After all, chahe kuch bhi ho, unke bacche ki maa toh tu hi rahegi na? No matter what, he can never change that. Sab theek ho jayega, tu dekhna. Aur phir main aur Armnan, hum dono bhi toh tere saath hain. You don't have anything to worry about."

"I know that. Par ek second ke liye meri baat chhod. Aaj kal tere har doosre sentence mein Armaan bhai ka naam zaroor aata hai (nidhi grinned). Yeh kya mamla hai. I think ke daal mein kuch kalaa hai. Isn't it about time you spill the beans. Mujhse kaisa chupana."

"Idiot main kyon tere se kuch chupane lagi bhalaa. And you are wrong, daal mein kuch kalaa nahin hai... ( the grin dropped off of her Nidhi's face) Yahan toh poori daal hi kaali hai..."

"What?" Nidhi Shrieked, making Anji hold the phone away from her ear."Itna kuch ho gaya, aur tune mujhe bataya tak nahin. I guess I am not important enough hunh? Now that Armaan Bhai is in your life. Meri jagah unhone le li." She said, sounding dejected.

"Nidhi...", Anji chided her gently, "don't be such a fool. Tujhe acchi tarha se pataa hai, teri jagah koi bhi nahin le sakta. Armaan bhi nahin. And waise bhi har rishte ki, aur har insaan ki jagah alag hoti hai hamari zindagi mein. Koi rishta kissi aur rishte ki jagah nahin le sakta. Tune hi toh mujhe sikhaayi thi ye baat. So why am I having to tell you all this. You already know. Besides, I can't even think about me till I know that you are Ok. Maine Armaan ko bhi yehi kahaa hai, and he agrees with me. And tere ko bina bataye toh main kabhi kuch kar hi nahin sakti. So don't worry. Ek baar teri problem solve ho jaye, uske baad meri baari."

Nidhi was amazed, aghast, and humbled at the magnitude of Anji's love and concern for her. But there was no way she would let her best friend suffer and sacrifice her happiness for her sake.

"Anji pyar jab bhi mile, jin damon mein mila, sasta hota hai. Love is priceless, and rare. Usse dono haathon mein le kar sar aankhon par rakkhna chahiye. Har koi tere jaisa khush kismat nahin hota. You need to grab at this chance that life has given you. And besides, kya shaadi ke baad hamara rishta khatm ho jayega? Agag nahin, toh phir kya problem hai? And you know that Armaan Bhaiya mujhe behen maante hain, aur bahut pyar karte hain. He will never stop you or hinder our relationship in any way."

Anji sounded reluctant,

"Haan Nidhi. Par..."

"Par war kuch nahin. Bas. Accha pehle mujhe bataa ke Uncle Aunty ka kya reaction hai?"

"They had some hesitations at first, but now they are happy with my choice. and they like Arman a lot. In fact (she chuckled) he gets along with them better than I do."

"Phir toh tere se bada duffer duniya mein koi nahin. Aise mein toh sab se bada hurdle parents and family ka hota hai. What with your age gap being almost the same as mine and Ashutosh's. And here you are lucky enough to have your parent's blessings aur phir... Accha sun, kal Arman Bhaiya ko apne ghar bula, subha subha. Main Unse, Aunty, Uncle, and tere se baat karna chahti hoon. Theek hai?"

"Haan Par kyon? I mean..."

Just then Nidhi heard footsteps coming towards the room, and the door knob turning. She cut Anji off,

"Sun Anji lagta hai Ashutosh aa gaye hain. Main chalti hoon. Theek hai? Kal subha milte hain. Make sure everyone is there. Achha bye."

And without giving Anji time to respond, she hung up.

Ashutosh looked up at her briefly, as she turned and walked towards him. She noted that he looked really tired, and his movement was very slow.

"So, Dr. Nidhi...Koi baat hai? Anything I can do for you?"

Nidhi frowned at his casual, aloof tone of voice.

"Yes..I mean no. No I don't need you to do anything, but yes there is something I need to discuss with you. Par uss se pehle mujhe bataiye, ki aapki surgery kaise rahi? Is the patient ok. And aapki car kahan hai. I didn't hear you drive up?"

His voice was weary as he answered,

"That's a lot of questions. Ok, let me see. Car nahin suni kyon ki main apni car mein nahin aaya. Arman dropped me off. I was tired, and in no mood or condition to drive my self. As for the surgery, well it was not a success. I lost the patient."

"I am so sorry. I know how much it bothers you when you loose a patient."

"No good doctor does Nidhi. And besides, this time it's not me or the patient, as much as his wife, who I am feeling bad for. My patient was a young man who just happened to be at the wrong place, at the wrong time. His only crime was going out at night to try and find a vendor who was open and sold "samose kachodi chat" that late. His Wife is pregnant you see. About 8 months, to be precise, give or take a week. Anyway, she was having a craving. He woke up and found her in the kitchen, getting ready to cook. But he happened to wake up in time and stopped her, saying that he would get it for her. Poor devil. The stupid drunk came out of nowhere, and plowed right into him as he was crossing the street. Never knew what hit him. But he was the lucky one. Uski wife ki halat bahut kharab hai. The moment she heard what happened, she rushed to the hospital, then sat outside in the waiting room, all alone, the whole time I was doing the surgery. They have no family other then themselves, you see. So on top of the stress of being pregnant, she had to wait all those hours, trying to keep faith and hope that her husband would make it out alive. Then she was informed, by me of course, that all the praying and hoping had been for nothing, because her husband didn't make it... She went into premature labor. Main abhi abhi wahin, uske paas se aa raha hoon. I had to stay with with her... Main usko akela nahin chod sakaa.( Nidhi put her hand on his shoulder for comfort, but he moved away, letting it drop back to her side) Anyway, she had to have an emergency C-Section. They had a girl. A beautiful healthy baby girl. And even though she is about a month premature, she is perfect. Par in sab baaton ka kya phayda, what good is health going to do her. She will have to go into an orphanage, and wahan health kaisi, aur being perfect kaisi. Koi fark nahin padta. Bahut badkismat hai woh bacchi, uska Baap toh phele hi chalaa gaya, and from the looks of it, her mother is not going to make it throught the night, either. Poor little mite. Duniya mein aane se pehle hi uski duniya ujad gayi."

"I am so sorry Ashutosh. Mujhe pataa hai aap kaisa feel kar rahein hain. Par ismein aapka kya kasoor. Aapne toh apni taraf se jo ban pada kiya hi hoga. I know you would have given it your all in trying to save that man. Par honi ko koi taal toh nahin sakta. Lekin abhi asha ki thodi bahut kiran toh hai. Uss bacchi ki maa toh zinda hai. And who knows, there might be a miracle, and she will survive. Abhi se umeed toh nahin chhodni chahiye na. Anyways...Let's wait and see kya hota hai. Chaliye Aap fresh ho jayiye, main abhi aati hoon."

Nidhi turned and left before Ashutosh could say anything.

He looked at her retreating back, with surprise. She had not talked this much to him since that night when he had lost control and rap...forced himself on her. Ashutosh ran a rough trembling hand through his hair, his eye filling with pain, that he dare not let show.

"Christ, what a mess!" He slammed his fist against the wall, welcoming the physical pain, as he got up and grabbed his clothes and went into the bathroom to freshen up After he was done, he went out onto the terrace, and stood there looking up at the stars, much as Nidhi had been doing earlier.

"Baba, I hope you can forgive me. Maine aapki beti ke saath accha nahin kiya. I have hurt her a lot. But I will do everything in my power to make sure ke ab usse koi takleef na pahuche. I will find a way to release her from the contract, and also that she gets everything she deserves in life. I promise you."

He had made a mess out of everything. And had been blinded by his anger, love, need, and pain. He had known she was goading him, that she had been hurt and was confused by his rejection, yet he had not controlled himself. He had taken advantage of her emotional weakness, and had overruled his own sense of right and wrong. Basically he had let his libido override his better judgment. He could still remember her shocked face, when he had ripped her clothes off of her body, and she had not even protested when he had practically thrown her onto the ground and forced his way into her. Nor had she complained when he had taken her again and again, all night. But he had seen the bruises, along with the tell tale bite marks, that he had left on her tender white skin the next morning. Luckily he had woken up before she had, because he knew that he would never have found out otherwise.

Nidhi had been lying on her back, one hand above her head and the other one lying at her side. Her face looking like the picture of innocence. If he had not had first hand knowledge that she was not untouched, he would have sworn that she was still an innocent. Then Nidhi had moved, and the sheet covering her slipped, exposing one exquisite breast to his view. Ashutosh had been mesmerized, and giving in to temptation had gently pulled the sheet down, exposing her torso.. Then, he had been appalled. Her beautiful skin was marred in various places, a testament to his animal side. He had covered her back up gently and had gotten ready and left for work. He had hated himself, yet he had turned to her night after night for the next four nights. Although he had taken taken great care to be as gentle as possible, his desire for her, his need had been insatiable. It was as though he was making up for lost time. Or trying to cram a lifetimes worth of loving into those five nights. Or maybe even both.

Ashutosh, knew that she wanted to talk to him, so had avoided her that whole day. Actually, he HAD BEEN AVOIDING HER, since that day. Hiding behind , silence, stoicism, mockery, and sarcasm, or whatever else he could think of, whenever he did have to deal with her. But, how long could things go on this way, he wondered to himself. Even if he had not heard her conversation with Anji...

It had been in the afternoon, after that first night, sometime during lunch time. Nidhi had come out onto the hospital roof, but she had not known that he was there too. He remember her sobbing her heart out, as she had related to Anji about how he had shrugged off her initial advances. That had been enough for him, he had not stayed to listen to anything else, knowing exactly what she would tell her best friend. She would tell her how her husband had practically raped her. And then had taken her over and over again all night, abusing his rights.

After that he had come to the realization that at some point he would have to let her go. He would have to set her free to live her life, the way she wished, with whom she wished. He had been very unfair towards her. His Nidhi deserved much much better in life, and someone much better than him. Someone who would love her, and place her needs before his own. Some one she could love and respect. And that person was not him. Hadn't she herself said as much.. Well she had been right. The contract and it's terms... He would find a way to release her from that.

Ashutosh had been very relieved that she had not gotten pregnant, and had vowed that he would make sure that did not happen now. He could not stand to have her so close to himself, day after day, and not make a fool out of himself again, or maybe inadvertently hurt her in some way, again. He could not even look her in the eye, after what he had done to her. Yes! Making love to Nidhi was out of the question. And asking her to have his baby, well, he could not be that cruel either.

He had seen, more like deliberately observed her interactionswith the children in the pediatric ward. He had even seen her in the new born nursery a couple of times. The way she was with kids...It would be obvious even to a blind man how much she adored them. There was even a time when she had brought in a small little girl from off the street, into the hospital.(the child had stood just outside the hospital gates begging passers by for money for food) She had had one of the nurses, bathe her, while she herself had gone to get her some clothes. and then had fed the child herself. How could he ask a woman like that to give up her own child, it would kill her. No he could not do that to her. Never.

His parents would be shocked at her leaving, and hurt of course. They had come to adore her. But, he would tell them everything. He would make sure that they knew all the details, so that all the blame would be on him. He would make them understand it was not her fault. That none of it was.

Ashutosh was so lost in his own thoughts that he did not hear her come back into the room. So he was startled when he heard her softly calling out to him.

"Dr. Ashutosh..."

Ashutosh came inside to find that she had brought him up some food, and had laid everything out on the table, ready and waiting for him.

He looked at the food, and then at her.

" You didn't have to go to all this trouble. I am not hungry. But thanks anyway for your concern." He said in a mocking tone. Once again hiding behind mockery. Using it to mask, to not let her see how much her thoughtfulness had moved him, how much he craved her caring and attention.

"I know. Mai samajh sakti hoon ke iss samay aapko khana khaane ki iccha bilkul nahin hogi. Aapko uss bacchi and uski Maa ke liye bahut phikr ho rahi hogi, na? Lekin Sir,( Ashutosh bit back a retort at her addressing him with that word "Sir", yet again. God he was really getting to detest that word) aapke na khaane se kuch change toh nahin ho jayega na. Besides, You have other patients who need you too. Aaapka unke prati bhi toh koi farz banta hai na. Agar aapne apna khayal nahin rakkha, aur aap khud beemar ho gayi, toh un sabka kya hoga. Isliye...thoda sa khaana kha lena chahiye.. Please."

Ashutosh gave her his mocking, sideway smile,

"Kya baat hai Dr. Nidhi", ( This time it was Nidhi who gritted her teeth. She hated it when he addressed her like that, as Dr. Nidhi, instead of Nidhi, and the mocking tone he used, was beginning to on her nerves) "Aap aaj badi meherbaan ho rahin hain mujhpe. Koi kaam hai mujhse."

Nidhi's face took on an angry color,

"No. Koi kaam nahin hai SIR. Bas insaaniyat ke naate, aapke liye thodi der galti se chinta kar baithi. I should have known that that aapko koi fark nahin padega. My mistake.. I am sorry."

She whirled around ready to leave, when the phone rang. She heard Ashutosh pick up, and stopped dead in her tracks, when she heard his voice. It had lost all traces of mockery. In fact it was his Flat No Nonsense Dr. HeartStone voice,

"Thank you for informing me Dr. Singh. I really appreciate it. I will see you in the morning. Please ask Dr. Pancham to wait for me. Yes... No please tell him not to worry about the hospital expenses. I want the baby to stay in the neonatal unit until she is totally in the clear. Yes... No I will take care of the charges. And Purnima...Thank you. I know you did everything you could. I will see you first thing. Good night."

She turned walked back to him placing her hand on his arm. Ashutosh turned to her and stared at her quietly for several seconds, before wordlessly reaching out and drawing he into his arms. Nidhi wound her arms arm him drawing him closer, offering warmth and comfort. Ashutosh took the comfort she was offering, and buried his face in her neck, as his arms tightened around her.

Nidhi ran her hand soothing up and down his back a few times before asking.

"Hospital se call tha? Uss bacchi ki Maa...?"

Ashutosh nodded silently.

"Ashuji..."

Ashutosh drew back in surprise, and looked at her in wonder. She had never called him that.

"I have to tell you something."

He waited patiently for her to continue,

"I am...( she wet her suddenly dry lips and swallowed) Mai...aap..."

Then without any sort of artifice, he said almost tenderly,

"Bolo Nidhi."

"I am Pregnant!"