Our KTLK - Kashmakash Chap 17 (pg 136) Updated - Page 19

Chapter 5:

While Nidhi is here, thinking about what fate seems to have given her in the form of Ashutosh, Ashutosh is standing in the balcony of the first floor, lost in his own thoughts. BB slowly makes his way up the steps and approaches him.

Ashu – Baba, aap ooper kyon aaye? You should have called me na. you are still weak.

BB – mein teek hoon Ashu. Lekin tum batao..kya soch rahe ho?

Ashu – nothing Baba. Sochne keliye kya hain Baba. Kuch bhi toh nahin na.

BB – Ashu, sach bata beta. Baat kya hain? woh jo subah aayi thi..Nidhi…who is she?

Ashu – she is an intern at KGH Baba. She told you that na.

BB – that's it? An intern? She means nothing to you?

Ashu – what could she mean to me Baba? I just met her last month for the first time.

BB – tum usse kab mile yeh important nahin hain Ashu. For someone to mean something to you, all you need is a chance to meet. That's all it takes sometimes.

Ashu huffs out a cynical laugh – kya Baba, woh ladki yahan aake ek din aapko rasam kya khiladiya, aap toh din mein hi sapne dekhne lage? Baba, Nidhi ek bachchi hain. mujhe shaayad 18-20 saal choti hain. uske baare mein mein aise kaise soch saktha hoon? Aur woh mere baare mein aisa kyon sochegi?

BB – Beta, pyaar umr ko nahin dekhta. Jisse jab hona hain hojaate hain. aur issme koyi galati nahin hain Ashu. Agar tumhe Nidhi se..

Ashu – Baba, buss..mujhe kissi se koi pyaar nahin karni hain. aur pyaar karke mein kya karoonga Baba? Jiss tarah mere baap ne meri ma ki zindagi tabah kardi, mein bhi kissi aur ladki ki zindagi tabah kardoo? Kya yeh aap ko manzoor hoga Baba?

BB forcefully shakes his head as a no and catches hold of Ashu by his shoulders. "Ashu, tum tumhaare pitah ki tarah nahin ho beta. You are different."

Ashu – different? Different how Baba? You were his friend all those years ago na. You know that I look like him, I have his temper aur kya pata mauka aane par mein bhi closet alcoholic banjaau. Aap unke itne achche dost the and even you didn't know what kind of a person he actually was until everything came out in the court.

BB – Ashu. If you were like him, you wouldn't be talking like this in the first place. And I have brought you up since you were 5 years old. Janam dene wale se zyaada paalne wala zyaada influence karta hain beta. Krishna ko Devki ne janam diya. Par woh hain toh Yashoda Nandan hi na.

Ashu – Baba, yeh sab baaten sunne mein achche lagte hain. hard fact is I have his genes. And there is no written guarantee that I won't become like my biological father. I studied this subject Baba. Abused kids have more chances of becoming abusive partners and parents. and I refuse to take that kind of chance on Nid…on someone else.

BB – dekha Ashu. Dil ki baat hooton par aahi gayi na. tu Nidhi se pyaar karne laga hain. aur yeh baat mein tab hi jaan gaya tha jab meine tum ko uske saath gaana gaate dekha. You tell me Ashu, when have you ever sung in front of others? You never did that before. Par aaj teri aawaz mein koi hichkichahat nahin thi. And jiss tarah se tum uski taraf dekhrahe the, your eyes told me the truth then itself.

Ashu – aaj ki baat alag hain Baba and it won't happen again. I WON'T let someone cut open my heart again.

BB – you can deny all you want Ashu. But the fact is if its destined to happen, neither of you have a choice. Nidhi tumhaare dil mein suraag karchuki hain Ashutosh. aur aaj nahi toh kal you will realize that its not a curse but a blessing.

He cups Ashu's cheek affectionately, smiles and leaves.

Dawn breaks with a cloudy weather and Nidhi makes her way home after the nightshift. CS gets her coffee as soon as she enters and Nidhi thanks him with a smile. CV – Nidhi, Good Morning Beta. Everything ok at KGH?

Nidhi – super peaceful night Baba. No emergencies. So could get some sleep too.

CV – Good Good. So aaj ka kya plan hain?

Nidhi – kuch nahin baba. My next shift is again at 3 and since its Saturday, Anji doesn't have college. So baitke bfast ke baad lunch tak khoob gappe maarenge.

CV – sounds like a plan. Go and freshen up and relax. I will tell CS to make your favourite bfast.

Nidhi – nahi baba. Tell him to make poha. Aaj maa ki bahut yaad aarahi hain. (she quickly blinks away her tears)

CV comes over and both hug and comfort each other. Nidhi wipes away her tears with the back of her hand and laughs a bit "maa humdono ko iss tarah dekhegi na toh hochuka!" CV also smiles at that. his wife was one of the strongest people that he had ever met. Shower and bfast later, Nidhi takes her cup of tea and jumps over the low wall separating CV's and Solanki's houses and goes to Anji's room. Anji is getting dressed for a relaxed stay at home.

Nidhi – Good Morning Anji! Kya chal raha hain? kya baat hain? aaj tu badi jaldi utgayi?

Anji – arre waah Nidhi, you looking chirpy today? Kya hua?

Nidhi – aisa kuch nahin hain. buss aiwee..!! (then giggles) achcha bol, tera bfast hogaya?

Anji – no. not yet.

Nidhi – then get your bfast on a plate and lets go onto the terrace. I want to talk to you.

Hurriedly both make their way to the terrace. Anji, with her bfast and Nidhi with her cup of tea.

Anji – ab bol. Kya baat karni hain?

Nidhi – kuch nahin yaar. Its been long since we sat and gossiped na toh..

Anji – Nidhi, you are a horrible liar. Now, come on, out with it.

Nidhi gets up from her place on the parapet wall and gives a thoughtful smile to Anji.

Nidhi – Anji, you remember the other day you asked how will I know when I fall in love?

Anji – oh yeah! Tumne kahaa..when you think of love and close your eyes, all you will see is that person.

Nidhi – Anji, I think I am in love.

Anji jumps up from her sitting position. – what? Kab? Kaise? Kaun hain woh? Do I know him?

Nidhi – kab aur kaise hua even I don't know. Buss hogaya.

Anji – par kisse?

Nidhi – Dr Ashutosh.

Anji looks at Nidhi with a look of utter disbelief at first and then smiles and wriggles her eyebrows. – is he handsome to look at?

Nidhi – mujhe toh bahut handsome dikhte hain.

Anji – tall, dark and handsome?

Nidhi – yes. with a beard and glasses and a few strands of grey at his temples.

Anji – you know, mujhe bhi bilkul aisa hi laga tha mere Math teacher ko dekh ke….jab mein 8^th std mein thi. And my darling, it is called infatuation. Its pretty common with teachers and bosses. Don't worry. You will get over it.

Nidhi – mein itni serious baat bolrahi hoon and you want to joke about it?

Anji – mazaak kahan yaar? Mujhe toh kahi nazar nahi aarahi. You said you are infatuated with your boss and I said it happens. That's all.

Nidhi gets angry now – yeh infatuation nahi hain Anji.

Now Anji is also serious – then what are you saying yaar? That you have fallen in love with a man who is almost 20 years elder than you? is that it?

Nidhi looks straight at Anji and answers – yes Anji. That's what I am saying.

Anji remains speechless for a few moments then recovers. – Nidhi, you have gone mad. Thoda akal laga. Soch! You yourself will realize that you are talking utter nonsense.

Nidhi – I have thought about it. That's what I have been doing for the past couple of days and that's what I did the WHOLE of last night. I do know that the situation is not ideal. Shaayad kisi ko samajh mein bhi nahin aayega. Kisi aur ki baat kyon? I don't understand it myself. I know my family probably won't accept it. Probably kya? They won't accept it for sure. But Anji, I didn't choose for any of this to happen. But now that it has, I am at a loss as to what to do. What do I do Anji?

Anji – listen, first of all, calm down. I don't think its love. No. wait. Don't get angry. Listen to what I have to say. Are you listening? Ok. now, don't do anything now. keep it aside. And if I am right and its just infatuation, it will go off by itself. And don't even THINK of mentioning this to Dr Ashutosh. he will laugh it off and you will end up looking like a fool or he will get furious and fire you. neither of those options is good. Right?

Nidhi – so you think I should just shut up? For how long Anji?

Anji – tell me one thing first. Is this guy married already?

Nidhi – no. I went to his house the other day to get some papers signed. I know he is not married. Ranganath also told me he is not married.

Anji – thank God for small mercies! Ok. as for how long. I don't know. First you have to be really sure and then you have to know what HE thinks of you. Nidhi, what is this yaar? Yeh sab sunne mein bhi ajeeb lag raha hain.

Nidhi's voice is filled with a kind of pain – imagine what I am struggling with Anji. You think I don't realize the situation is hopeless? Par Anji, mera yakeen maan..he DOES mean something to me. Everytime I meet with him, I have this sense of familiarity. Apnepan ka ehsaas hota hain Anji. I know loving him is neither ideal nor easy. But I don't seem to be having a choice here.

Anji comes close and gives her a tight hug. "sab teek hojayega Nidhi. don't worry. Mein hoon na tere saath." Nidhi nods her head and closes her eyes tight before any stray tears seep through them. Anji thinks to herself – "God yeh kya horaha hain mere Nidhi ke saath! You keep putting her through one test after the other. Pehle aunty ab yeh! I was so happy to see her smiling and laughing the last few weeks. The thought never even crossed my mind that the reason behind that would be something like this. Bhagwaan, aap ne yeh situation rakha hain na. toh aap hi solve karo. But whatever You decide, I will stay with my friend and support her. and that's my promise to You."

Ashu comes to KGH at his usual time and despite his resolve that he won't have anything do to with her, after signing in, and on his way to his cabin, his eyes glance towards the paediatric ward. Nidhi always spends a few minutes with the kids in the morning no matter which dept she is assigned to. But there is no ponytail or girly giggles from there today. May be she already left. His OPD keep him busy through the morning and there is a surgery scheduled in the afternoon. So he makes his way to the canteen at the lunch hour, takes a plate of a couple of rotis, daal and some salad. He sits and just stares at the plate. Then he glances at the watch, at the canteen entrance door and then back at the plate. Is he early or is she late? He starts playing with the salad and keeps pushing it around in the bowl with his spoon. "Dr Ashutosh, noone taught you in the childhood that it's a bad habit to play with your food?" he glances up at a smiling Dr Kothari, the Gyn at KGH. she pulls up another chair and sits with her own plate. "may i? or are you waiting for someone?"

Ashu – sure. Sure. No. I am…I am not waiting for anyone.

Dr K – are you sure?

Ashu – yes Doctor. Why do you ask?

Dr K – no…the way you kept looking at your watch and pushing the food around instead of eating..

Ashu – no. its nothing like that. I actually have a surgery scheduled now and my mind is already there. And I wasn't feeling very hungry.

Dr K – oh. Ok. I understand. Silly me, for a second I thought Dr Ashutosh ko najaane kiska intezaar hain!

Ashu gives an awkward smile to her. she was a gentle but firm person who is said to have a lucky touch where childbirth and fertility cases are concerned. She quickly finishes her lunch but observes that Ashu didn't finish even half of it. Before she could ask if everything is ok, he excuses himself and leaves.

Nidhi gets ready for her 3 pm shift at KGH. she contemplates wearing a sari but decides against it. Kuch zyaada hojayega. instead she wears a peacock blue salwar with a peacock blue and green dupatta. She puts her hair in its usual ponytail but with a matching rubber band. A slight lipgloss and tiny matching earrings, wrist watch and matching high heals, she is ready to go. She collects her coat and steth and a couple of books, tells bye to CV and DB and leaves. Its drizzling slightly for the past one hour and she sees a florist on the way and stops the car and makes her purchase. In one of the meetings last week, everyone were gathered in Ashu's cabin to discuss a case and one of the senior assistants had commented that Ashu's cabin is so sterile. No colour, no personal touches, nothing. If not for the board outside, its tough to say that the cabin belonged to the Dean of KGH. she reaches KGH on time, parks her car, puts on her coat and has the flowers in one hand, steth and books in the other. She walks briskly towards the entrance, her thoughts as to how to put the flowers in Ashu's cabin without his knowledge. She almost reaches the reception area when the ground suddenly turns a little slippery and she skids. In her effort to balance herself, her books and steth fall off and she flays her arms trying to stop her fall when suddenly a strong arm shoots out and holds the wrist of her hand which is still clutching the flowers and prevents her crashing down to the ground. He holds her hand tight and her startled eyes meet that of Dr Ashutosh. after making sure she has regained her balance, he leaves her hand and directly his glare at the receptionist. He is still in his surgical scrubs so either he is just out of OT or just about to go there.

Ashu – where is the cleaning staff? I want them here RIGHT NOW.

Receptionist nods, swallows down her nervousness and calls the cleaners. Both of them arrive.

Ashu – may I know what it is that you people are doing?

Cleaner – sir, woh hum..

Ashu – subah se bearish horahi hain and you know that if the floor is wet, it could be slippery. Right?

Cleaner – ji sir.

Ashu – then why wasn't it cleaned? Or put a board that the ground is wet and slippery. Kam se kam aanewale logon ko pata toh chale.

Cleaner – ji woh hum clean karne hi wale the..

Ashu – kab? Do teen logon ke dirne ke baad ya unko fracture hone ke baad? Yahan pe log apne zakhmon ka ilaaj karvaane aate hain. zakhm khaane keliye nahi. Samjhe aap? Ab jaayiye and get this whole area cleaned up. (then he turns towards Nidhi, who is trying to slip away unnoticed) aur aap. Dr Nidhi Verma. Aap dekhke chal nahin sakti kya? Agar aap ko chalna teek se aata nahin hain toh highheels pehente kyon hain? hum apne patients ko dekhe ya interns ko?

Nidhi – I…am…sorry sir. Aage se dhyaan rakhoongi.

A brief flicker of hurt shines through her eyes before she blinks, covers it up and bends to collect her books and steth. But that tiny flicker is enough to douse off his temper in an instant. Nidhi straightens up and says "thank you sir" without looking at him and leaves. She goes to the interns room and deposits her books there and stands for a moment. Baap re what a temper he has got! Then her glance falls on the flowers she is still holding. A bunch of 5 roses of 5 different colours. Pink, orange, white, red and yellow. She slowly smiles. Now she is sure Ashu is not in his cabin so it's the best time to put them there. She quickly makes her way there and slowly opens the door and peeks inside just to make sure he is not there. After assuring herself, she steps in and looks around for something to put the flowers in. not finding anything suitable, she takes out a spare glass from the cupboard, fills it with water, places the roses in it, puts the whole thing on his table and after a quick look at the overall picture of the table, leaves the room. Dr Rao literally keeps her on her toes for the rest of her shift and she hardly gets time to think about anything else. A little after 8, she finally signs off and chats for a few mins with Rihaan, who just signs in for his nightsift and makes her way out. what started out as a drizzle in the afternoon by now has turned into a full fledged downpour with thunder and lightening. Nidhi stands at the entrance and contemplates as to what to do. Should she drive in this weather and go or wait and see if there is a chance that its going to subside. Just then she gets a call from her baba asking her to wait and not to drive in this rain. Ok. decision out of her hands now. she makes her way to the canteen as she is feeling hungry.

Nidhi gets some sandwiches and a cup of tea. She collects it then as if unable to stop herself asks, "aaj Dr Ashutosh lunch par aaye the kya?" Chotu, who helps out in the canteen answers. "haan Dr Nidhi. par teek se khaaye nahin. jaldi chale gaye." She frowns on her way to the table. "he didn't eat? Why? Is he coming down with something? The same viral that his Baba has got? Shall I go and see how he is now? or should I leave it alone? I met his this afternoon. He seemed ok then na." she quickly gulps down the tea and takes a few bites of the sandwich while thinking this whole thing through and then finally gives up trying to stop herself and goes to his cabin and softly knocks on the door. "come in please!" Nidhi goes inside.

Nidhi – hello sir.

Ashu is looking at some medical reports and doesn't look up at her. "yes Dr Nidhi?"

Nidhi – sir, aap ke Baba ab kaise hain?

Ashu still doesn't look up – his antibiotic has kicked in. so he is recovering. No fever today. So he is fine. And he conveys his thanks for your rasam.

Nidhi – oh that's…that's good sir. And no thanks required. I was glad to do that for him. (then not knowing whatelse to ask or say, she turns to go) mein chalti hoon sir. Just wanted to ask you that that's all.

Ashu – and Dr Nidhi, why the flowers?

Nidhi – ji? Kya…kaun se flowers sir?

Ashu finally looks up at her. – Dr Nidhi, I think you are the only one in KGH who is not only brave enough to decorate my room but also try to lie to me about it. So...back to my question. Why the flowers?

Nidhi looks at him with eyes that hold part shyness and part mischief. "woh sir, I felt your room is too sterile and impersonal. Toh socha thoda rang bhardoo."

He looks at her for a few more seconds, finally nods his head and turns his attention back to the reports. She turns to leave and opens the door when he says, "thank you Nidhi. Cabin ka toh pata nahin but the day has certainly been colourful. Goodnight."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LicWAGzm5SA

Nidhi's face looks like a bulb has been tuned on inside her. "goodnight Dr Ashutosh." her feet feel as if they have wings of their own and she comes out to see that the rain has gone down to just drizzling. She slows down and makes her way to the parking lot and her car, opens the back door and drops her things on the seat and closes it. Then she just closes her eyes and turns her head up towards the sky to feel the drops of rain on her face. There is a beautiful smile lingering on her lips as they become wet in the rain and she cups her hand and tries to hold on to a few rain drops. "I don't want to fight with myself anymore. I am in love! I am in love with Dr Ashutosh! if that makes me the most insane woman on the face of this earth, then so be it."

The next day morning:

DB – Nidhi, ut meri bachchi! Dekh suraj pe chad gaya hain aur tu hain ki abhi tak sorahi hain. NIDHI!

Nidhi pulls her blanket over her head. – DB, aaj Sunday hain. kitni mushkil se hafte mein EK Sunday aata hain aura aap mujhe utne ko bolrahe hain. jaayiye. Mujhe sona hain.

DB pulls away the blanket. "Nidhi, get up now. you are a good girl na. chalo chalo ut beta ut. Mein CS ko bolke tere liye coffee bhijwati hoon. Haan?" saying that she hurries away. Nidhi gets down from the bed with a grumpy face and an even grumpy mood. She freshens up and comes out to the hall with the towel still thrown over her shoulders and around her neck. But mood..still grumpy.

Nidhi – Baba, kya baba, DB ne mujhe utadiya. Aaj toh thodi der sonediya hota na.

CV – Beta, why your DB does what she does and when, yeh toh mere samajh ke baahar hain. better just go with the flow.

CS hands over the coffee and Nidhi grumbles a "thank you CS". DB hurries over again. "Nidhi, you are awake? Good good. Now, quickly have your coffee and get ready. Wear a sari today. Woh jo uss din shaadi mein pehenke gayi thi na. that one. ok?"

Nidhi gives a total disbelieving look. "DB, whats got into you? ek toh you woke me up from sleep and now you are saying I have to gulp down my coffee and deck up? Kyon? Kisliye? And I don't want to know for what. I am not getting decked up. At least not so early in the morning.

DB – arre par beta, meri baat toh sunn..

Nidhi picks up the newspaper and with her coffee cup in one hand and newspaper under her arm, makes her way to the main door. She wants to go and sit in the swing outside and enjoy the coffee and super lazy morning. Just as she opens the door, there is someone on the other side about to ring the bell. Both Nidhi and the other person are startled for a second.

Nidhi – yes?

"hi. My name is Rohan. And I am here to meet a Dr Nidhi."

Comments welcome 😊