Aaj chautha din hai…Mujhe andekha karte huye…mujhe avoid karte huye jaise ki main hoon hi nahi..mera wajood hi nahi hai..mere saamne se aise guzar jaati hai…Mai rok bhi nahi paata..na kuchh bol paata hoon….Bas idhar Hospital ke bahar khada rehta hoon uske liye..sayad mujhe dekh kar muskura de…kuchh bhi bol de..jaise ki "tum kaise ho??"..par nahi aisa hota nahi wo apne pati ke saath aati hai…chali jaati hai…..
Char din pehle tak sab thik tha….hansti thi..baatein karti thi….mere baalon par apni ungliyaan pherti thi….mujhe phool dena…Din mein baar baar aa kar mera haal puchna..meri chinta karna….na chahte huye bhi wo mere soye armaan jaga rahi thi…..Andar kuchh anjaane ehsaas karwat lete they…mujhe dard hone laga tha halka halka…usse dekh kar chen milta tha…kayi baar usse jaan bhujh kar chuaa bhi tha aur der tak apne haath ko dekhta rehta tha….main kis lehar mein beh rahaa tha…
Main kitna nadaan bewaquf hoon iss baat ko kabhi bhi dhyaan nahi diya ki wo apne Pati ke saamne mujhse aisa pyaar wala byabhar karti hai…mujhe to usne bataya nahi ki wo shaadishuda hai…sayad apne pati ko jalane ke liye main uski haath ka khilona tha….par wo kya samajh paayi ki ab main zindagi ke liye khilona ban gaya hoon….
Mujhe khudse nafrat ho rahi hai….ki maine kisi ko khud ka istemaal karne diya….uss insaan se main pyaar karne lagaa hoon..jiske liye main bas ek mohra hoon….usne mujhe jis din bataya ki wo shaadishuda hai..mujhe laga jaise goli mere hriiday ko chithde chithde kar ke nikal gayi ..mujhe laash bana ke…kyu bachaya isne mujhe???..mujhe phir se zinda rehte maar dene ke liye????
Mere andar sapne kyu jagaye usne….uske liye kitna asaan tha….apne Pati ko mere saamne laana aur kehna "ye mere pati hai..hamare beech an- ban thi..tumhari wajah se hum phir se paas aa gaye"
Jab main khud ke aansoo nahi rok paaya….aur wo chalak pade to wo poochne lagi.."ro kyu rahe ho??"
Maine kuchh nahi kahaa tha..bilkul khamosh tha….uske pati uska haath pakad ke le gaye….mujhe hospital se discharge mil gaya…..
Main ghar gaya par uski yaad jaise ek ajgar ke jaise mujhse lipti huyi hai…iska ilaaj kaun karega….Kaash wo mere jazbat se nahi khelti…wo aur uske pati khush hai..
Main bhi khush hoon unke liye..par mera dil Rota hai..apmaanit ho kar..avoid ho kar….
Mai 4 din se hospital ke bahar aa ke khada rehtaa hoon..wo mujhe dekhti hai aur chali jaati hai….
Aur kitna dard taqleef doon khud ko…Aur kitna apmaanit karwaoon….main toh bas chup reh sakta hoon sirf chupp..pyaar karne ki ek saza……Aur kyaa kar sakta hoon..😭
Kabhi Neem Neem Kabhi Shahad Shahad
Fan Fictions
