Just read the post as my personal POV on the last Episode, I don't mean to hurt anyone in personal. Thank You
I have just watched the last episode again and left with mixed emotions. I felt equally bad for both Ashu(loved the stubble, wish he'll keep it) and Nidhi. Both of them are right at their end, both are guilty for giving pain to the other one and more over the episode has brought into focus the difference of personalities they are…… Her nature of being more vocal and expressive against his in expressiveness………………. Interestingly, this expressive nature of Nidhi gives her an edge over Ashu, and portrays her love as strong and sacrificing, superficially and showcases him as selfish person
I was actually surprised with Nidhi's behavior in the episode. To me personally she is never mature for her age 24/25, but she is sensitive towards people and I feel this sensitive and kiddish Nidhi attracted Ashutosh. Marriage is not just about giving or taking, it is complementing and comprising for each other and allow the partners to grow in their own space. Marriage is a mutual agreement, so should be the decisions..
Though, Initially I felt bad for Nidhi crying as she is right in her POV, but the way she wanted to discuss is something I'm not happy with. When she is firm with her decision, why she wants to hear his desires again, although it is clearly written on his face. She is unbending on her end at least for now, and then what is the need to probe on "bargain".
He has accepted her decision and yes he is not happy not that for she wants to work, but she has rejected his desire. I think, Ashu is right by being silent. What will he discuss, will he be able to say he is insecure and feared of rejection. If he expresses these insecurities, he will rob dignity in his own eyes, moreover in a way it is insulting Nidhi's love. To me, he will never come up with this discussion. He is shameful and guilty for giving pain to Nidhi and at the same time he is uncertain, insecure and can't go off his desires easily.
To me his sulking is sensible. He has rough childhood and bouts of rejection. Orphan and Vulnerable Childhood haunts a person throughout the life, no matter however successful he/she is, as it is the phase which shapes your psyche. Insecurities will never leave us, we keep them subsided at sub-conscious level, indeed is the beauty of human mind. He wants to support her whole heartedly and even agreed to postpone his desires…..but his insecurities are bruised…………… Here, Ashu won't have iota doubt on Nidhi, he doubts himself, he always doubts whether he is capable of love and acceptance of others.
To me, for Ashu child is something which binds him with Nidhi in the highest possible way, an unbreakable bond can only be separated…… Thought of having a child is a kind of visceral surging or churning sensation lay deep inside him and evoked by DB, now the need is consuming him. There is an expression we call it as "The Peak Expression", which emotionally nothing in our life ever transcends, may be child means the same for Ashu….In a way telling "through this flesh, which is us, we are you and you are us", stems from the oldest traditions of humankind to accept and acknowledge the bonding.
Thanks again for bearing this post, think I read too much in between the lines, but it is how actually he should be given the glimpses of HIM, exposed so far…….
Anupamaa
