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You know the drill. Here's the thread for today. If you refresh occasionally like you do for written update, you might be able to read as I update. I will start updating as the episode gets uploaded. You guys can continue your discussion. I will update as I go.
Asha comes outside the Dixit mansion and hesitates to go inside. Dev sees her and asks her to come in.
Today, I will share another incident with you from my life. As a child, I was a very impatient person. I still am a very impatient person. I always had a massive thirst for life - to experience everything, to absorb everything, to do everything.
My mother is exactly the opposite. She is a very calm, gentle person and got immense patience for everything. If she never leaves her home and spends her entire life in the same boring routine, she won't mind. If I make her go in a different adventure every single day, she won't mind either. In short, she is a little too "zen" of a person whom Gandhi would have happily married.
I am the kind of person who would have made Gandhi commit suicide in disappointment.
She used to say that I am like the rabbit with the clock in Alice in Wonderland. Always rushing everywhere.
I always felt that I have just one life to live and time is running out. So if I have to live it the way that if I drop dead tomorrow, I will have no regret.
So at the ripe old age of 25 when my mother thought that she has given me enough time to get the wanderlust and adrenaline rush out of my system and thought to approach me for marriage, I told her that I am moving to Canada. Nope, not to marry. But to experience something different.
So you might say, I am a gambler. But I am no fool. I only place bets on a sure win, the only chip I can rely on, the only chip I own - Myself. The one thing which I control is me. I know my strengths, I know my weaknesses. So I go with my eyes wide open and put my chips on me.
The only time I do not rush into is when I have to make a long-term, irrevocable, no return/no exchange commitment to someone or something. Because that's no longer relying on me. Now we have other factors making their contributions. You might even say, when it comes to those, I am slightly commitment phobic. Okay, I am a lot commitment phobic.
A lifelong commitment is hard (for me at least). This is how I judged whether I wanted to marry someone or not.
I told myself to imagine that I will have to look at his face first thing in the morning and last thing in the night, I will have to tolerate his morning breath, beer belly, all other nasty habits that I don't want to mention. Will I still think he is worth it?
Also, he will see my morning face every morning, he will also have to put up with my flabby thighs (gonna happen someday), muffin top (also gonna happen someday), weird and nasty habits that I think are awesome and unique but really aren't to anyone else. Will he still want to be with me then?
My husband knew that he is going to marry me within 3 months of meeting me. But it took him a whole year to convince me. Well, because I am commitment phobic. After we got engaged, it took him another 6 months to convince me to set the date. So, yes. I took a little work.
But during that time something happened that changed my fear of commitment. I was going through a troubled time with my employer at that time and my husband stood like a rock by me along with the rest of his family who called up other family members to find out how to help me in this situation.
At that time, I closed my eyes and took the blind faith jump and put all my chips on the table and never regretted it once.
But what if he hadn't? What if he had left me alone to struggle? Would I have put my trust on him again? No way in hell. Who takes a losing bet all over again?
There is a technique Human Resource in Canada uses when interviewing potential candidate for a job.
They don't ask what would you do in such and such situation. Because then people can lie and you have no way of knowing whether they will do the same or just saying it to gain your trust and to get the job.
They ask, tell us about a situation such and such and how did you deal with it. The idea behind these kind of question (also called Behaviour based question) is that human being repeat past behaviour which got them success and/or helped them avoid negative consequences. Past can be verified unlike future which is all speculation.
So let's apply that in a life partner selection, shall we?
Instead of asking, will you be by my side in my tough time, why not ask, could you tell me about a time when you had to choose between doing the right thing and your family's wish, what did you do?
Guess what? If he has a track record of backing out when his family put the foot down, you better hope his family never turns against you. Otherwise, you are so in trouble.
And if he went and did the right thing anyway despite his family not wanting him to be involved, rest assured that he will do the right thing, no matter who is right. Then come hell or high family pressure, this man is solidly by your side.
But then, when it comes to life, I am not someone who gambles on a bet I lost more than once, let alone twice. I have a short life to live. I can only risk my happiness so many times without getting bankrupt and sitting in a padded cell.
And then there are people who keep on placing bets on losing game hoping that someday their luck will smile and they will get their dues and then some.
Some people indeed has that kind of luck. They are one in a million.
The odds on the other hand is on losing side.
That's why, gambling addiction never gets you anything but loss in the long run. Because no matter how great a player you are, the house which holds all the chips, ALWAYS WINS!!!
EPISODE: The episode starts with Sona in the kitchen grabs an apple and Radha blocks her way.
She asks Sona what's bothering Dev.
Sona asks her to ask Dev. She also butters her up saying that since she had been taking care of the family for 7 years, Dev must share everything with her.
Radha says that she doesn't have to worry about Dev.
Sona says that Dev is her daughter's father so whatever impacts him also impacts her daughter.
She leaves from there.
Me: I am confused. Did Sona lie to Radha about her concern for Dev is only because he is Soha's father or is she playing some games? If she only cares for Dev because of Soha then what's the reason for being all flirty and giggly with him? That is giving out mixed signals. Would she talk to Jatin that way ever?
Anyhoo, Elena calls Asha and tells her that Dev and Sona celebrated their anniversary together.
Asha is all excited to know that she can get rid of her liability soon.
Elena tells her that it's all for Soha. She made it happen. She says that Sona was very happy and when she saw them happy, she was happy too. She hopes that Sona gets together soon.
Asha is happy that Sona was happy.
Me: Asha ko happy hona hi chahiye. After all when she wasn't happy around Dev, she made sure that the brainwash was done enough on her part so that Sona has no other choice but to follow her wish like a sheep (just like before). Who doesn't like to see their hard work to pay off?
Asha continues that she doesn't want to be happy to soon. In last few years, she was Sona's best friend instead of mother. What is going on in her heart, she knows before Sona. She wishes them to change for Soha and hopes that they become more matured for her.
Elena says that she hopes that Sona and Dev give each other another chance.
Asha says that she hopes the same. She hopes that whatever decision they take, they take it for them.
Me: You know what is the problem with lies? Unlike truth which is always consistent since that's fact, lies needs to maintain their consistency.
Now I know why Elena wants Dev and Sona to get together. One, she will have someone she can trust in Dixit house who is also the Tulsi of Dixit angan as in outsider. She also knows that the only way she will get re-entry in Bijoy's house if somehow she can make his daughter happily agree to get back in Dixit hellhole. Because Bijoy only wants his daughter to be happy. He wants no other thing from anyone.
He will forget and forgive everything if his daughter gets her happiness. So Elena is basically using Dev and Sona's relationship to fulfil her own agenda.
Because if she was really so concerned with Dev and Sona's happiness, she'd have bothered to find out if Sona was alive or not in the past 7 years. She didn't even bother to call secretly. So her concern for Sona's happiness now sounds as fake as her concern for Golu. A selfish person never changes.
Asha on the other hand had been lying to herself to hide her own agenda for so long that she has started to believe in her lies. However, she also massively contradicting because well, everything she had been saying was a lie.
For example, in one breath she says that Dev and Sona should give each other a chance for Soha, in next breath she says that they should give each other chance for themselves.
In one breath she says that she is Sona's best friend, but she is not behaving like a best friend who supports their friend in every decision they make. No. She is influencing her so-called best friend so that she takes the decision she wants her to take.
That is not how a best friend behaves. That's called manipulation using a position of trust. No one thinks that Manthara was Kaikayee's well wisher or Shakuni was Gandhari's well-wisher.
Dev comes to Golu and tries to cheer him up.
Golu shows him attitude. He says that he doesn't want to play with him and tries to make him jealous using Vicky.
Dev asks if he is angry. Golu says that he is not angry with him. Because people gets angry with important people and he is not important for him.
Dev asks if he has a new best friend. Golu says that he didn't but maybe Dev made new best friends.
Dev says that he only had one best friend for 7 years and that's Golu. He tickles Golu and he starts laughing.
Dev asks for forgiveness and Golu forgives him.
Dev says that he will take him and Soha for a class.
Me: Bhaiya, do you realise how lucky you are? You are surrounded by people who are willing to forgive you over and over very easily without zero effort on your part. Yet you keep letting them down over and over. Learn how to balance relationship while there is time. Because like everything, patience has a limit.
Saurabh overheard Elena. He asks Asha if he heard right. Saurabh asks if Asha also wants them together.
Asha tells Saurabh to drop her in front of Dixit house. She wants to see them together and see for herself if what Elena said may come true or not.
Saurabh reminds her of the rule. Bijoy is also in Kolkata. So she should not go.
Asha says that she will go for sure because only she knows how much Sona needs Dev which even she doesn't know. In last few years, when she was upset, she had come to Asha. But she knew that Sona needed Dev at that time, not her. Whether Bijoy understands Sona or not, she knows better. She is strong, independent, but she still believes in fairy tales and Dev is her prince charming. Asha can at least see her once. So she requests Saurabh to take her.
Saurabh agrees to drop her off.
Me: Oh really, Asha? Is that so? Then tell me, if Sona still believes in fairy tale and Dev is her prince charming, why did you try to convince her to marry Jatin? Are you then the wicked witch of her story?
What kind of fairy godmother tries to convince Cinderella to run away with the coachman?
You know Asha when I said that your agenda was always clear to me is because you had been giving away clues left, right and centre.
You want your daughter's marital status to be married, not single or divorced. That was your primary agenda in season one and it is your primary agenda in season two.
If you truly thought that Sona only needed Dev, why did you try to make her marry Jatin? What if she had agreed then? Would you now convince her to run away with her real prince charming leaving her husband? Hell no. Then you will convince her to forget Dev and tell her that Jatin is her prince charming.
Now I know where Sonakshi learned how to lie to herself. She learned it from you. Honestly, when it comes to selfishness, you are no less than Ishwari these days.
In fact, even stalking behind your daughter is now in your kitty.
What do you expect by going to Dixit house? Do you expect to see Dev and Sona running in garden sitting on a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G?
Didn't you give Ishwari lecture that when children reaches a certain age, parents should butt out of their business and let them take their own decision at their own pace on their own time?
Then what are you doing?
But then, you are the great wise woman, Asha who knows better than everyone about everything. You know Sona better than she knows herself. What a buck load of arrogance you got. Come to think of it, didn't Ishwari claim the same about Dev? But then since she wanted to separate her son and Sona, different rules for her and since you want to force them together, separate rules for you.
Asha comes outside the Dixit mansion and hesitates to go inside. Dev sees her and asks her to come in.
She tells him about the rules. Dev says that she can come in as either Soha's friend or his because the same rules that apply to Sona's friends (Jatin) of course doesn't apply to his (Elena, Asha).
It's all depending on his wish and whom he likes.
He flirts with Asha, she giggles.
Me: So let me get this straight. Jatin can't come in because if Sona's friend is allowed, then he is considered more important than Ishwari.
But Elena and Asha can break the rules because they are Dev Dixit's choice and everyone knows what Dev Dixit wants is more important than anything else.
Just like always, Dev Dixit's family and people he considers friends > Sonakshi's family and friends.
So basically nothing changed since season one.
The thing is though that a person whose words are not worth the air he spends, betting on him is like betting on a throw of a rolling dice to give 7. You can try until eternity, but what ain't there, isn't coming up ever.
Dev brings Asha inside and tells her that he will make something for her. Asha is all impressed. Radha gave her evil eye.
Dev comes to kitchen and pours juice.
Vicky comes there.
Dev tells him that why is he walking around sad? He said sorry. So not to keep anything inside and let it go.
Me: This statement reeks of Ishwari's entitlement. Vicky doesn't deserve sorry, but Dev (or Ishwari) doesn't deserve forgiveness because they bothered to utter sorry. Forgiveness comes at the other person's discretion, not based on their one sorry. They are so used to getting forgiven for such a little or no effort on their part that they take it for granted that it's only a matter of time until their slate is wiped clean.
Anyhoo, Vicky says that it's his speciality to keep things inside. Not his.
He grabs the drink he made for Asha and drinks it.
Dev tried to stop him saying that he made it for Asha.
Vicky says that Dev never made any drink for his brother and now he made drink for that woman?
Dev says to speak with respect about her. She is Sonakshi's mother.
Vicky mocks, why is he doing fake drama? He is talking about the respect of those people whom he himself had destroyed. Does he remember that?
Dev is silenced.
Me: Hummm... I was wondering about that. So Dev still thinks he was the one who brought the Bose family on the street. That brings me to the question that how did he continue to blame Sonakshi for leaving him after all this? Did he expect Sonakshi to kick her family in the footpath and be under his mother's thumb again like Elena did?
Is that their idea of ideal woman?
But you know what is the funny thing? Dev blamed Sonakshi for not trusting him and Sonakshi accepted the blame. Yet, he himself doesn't trust him when it comes to doing something so cheap. He never could claim that he can't ever do anything like this because sober or drunk, he is not that kind of person. But I guess, Bhaiya doesn't trust himself either. Smart. At least smarter than Sonakshi for sure.
Dev says what happened, happened in the past. Vicky has no reason to dig up the past.
Vicky asks what happened? What favour have they done that he is entertaining them so much? He asks Dev to say if that woman has done something, then he...
Dev interrupts: Enough. Sonakshi is mother of my daughter.
Vicky says that he knows. But he asks if Sonakshi is the mother of his daughter or something else?
Dev says that there is no point talking to him.
Vicky asks to let him know what Sonakshi has done that Dev is not willing to listen anything against her?
Dev says that what she has done, none of them had able to do.
Vicky is surprised. Dev leaves with the drink.
Me: I don't know what makes people in both houses clean license to interfere in other people's personal life. Asha, Elena, Ishwari, Radha, Vicky... They all are fulfilling their own agenda using Dev and Sona as puppets.
The only person who should be bothering with any of this is Dev and Sona. To be or not to be together is their business, no one else's.
However, Vicky has a point. Sonakshi was Soha's mother even when Bhaiya was insulting her. However, now that Sona has paid favour to Ishwari in Dixit vending machine, respect in tiny bag has fallen. To make the vending machine run again, she has to continue to make payment there until eternity. That's how Dixit house runs. You pay and then only you get to stay.
In the living room, Radha gets into her business. She says that first Sona, then Elena, then Soha, then again Sona and now her. Why does Bose family woman try to get inside their family?
Asha stammers, Look actually...
Radha interrupts, people like her has hundreds of excuses. She knows that. So let it be.
Asha is upset.
Me: Well, one thing for sure Asha. 7 saal mein Radha to nehin badli. Ishwari ko to jaane hi do. Woh to 70 saalon mein bhi nehin badalne wali. To Bijoy ko lecture dene se pehle, apni Maa hone ki responsibility to nibha lo. Kaun apni beti, jo bahut mehnat se khai se nikalke aayee hain, usse dubara ussi khai mein dhakka deti hain kyunki upar se uska scenary achhi dikh rahee hain? Agar scenary dekhne layak hota, to woh nikalti hi kyun?
Radha continues that when her Jiji went to their house, then they pushed her out of their home. Now how dare she come back there again?
Asha says to let Dev know that she is going home.
Me: Arre Asha? Itni jaldi insult se man bhar gaya? Kyun? Novel nehin likhna? Tolerance pe lecture nehin dena hain?
Kya karen? Sona mein tolerance hi nehin hain. Lekin aap mein to hain. Zara demo nehin dengi humme?
Bijoy ki pampering aur Dida ki respect bahut difficult dikh rahee thi naa? Radha ka do taana hazam nehin hua?
Lekin aap to yehin Sona ko permanently settle karna chahti hain. Shame on you, Asha. Shame on your hypocrisy.
Dev comes there and says that she is not going anywhere. She is staying there.
Radha says that let her go. She has no place in this house.
Dev says that if she has no place here, then make it.
Radha says that the people who threw his mother out, he is allowing them to come there? He can do anything. But she has to answer to Jiji. She left for four days and you forgot her and her insult?
Dev says what needs to be said to his mother, her son will do. She doesn't want to worry about that. She is looking tired so she should go in.
Radha says that he is asking her to go inside for that lady? Who is her to him? Nobody.
Asha says that she should go.
Dev stops her, no. This home is his and she is his guest. She is not going anywhere.
Radha says that's fine. She doesn't stay where she has no respect. She should have left this house 7 years ago. But what could she do? This house would have turned into a ruin.
She storms away.
Me: I have nothing to say here. I am just waiting to see if Asha could tolerate this behaviour for as long as Sona did and if after seeing the atmosphere, she still is only concerned about her daughter's marital status or her mental and emotional well-being.
Dev says that he is sorry.
Asha says that it was her fault. She should not have come there. She doesn't want to create problem between him and his family. As it is both family's situation is...
Dev stops her, situation can be changed.
Elena comes there.
Asha says that she was about it go. So it's good that she got to meet her.
Elena is surprised to hear that she is leaving so soon.
Asha says that she was missing Soha so she came there. But she is not there, so she will come some other day. Then she can meet Sona and Soha both.
Dev says that driver will drop her.
Asha leaves.
Me: Asha now lie much more comfortably. The so-called ideal mother is now emulating the Goddess. Great.
But Asha, don't worry. Radha has gave the news that 6 days are over. So tomorrow whether you want your unwanted liability or not, she is supposed to return back at her father's home. So you could have kept your respect by not telling such a blatant lie.
You didn't bother coming there when Soha was sick and now you can't wait one day to see Soha? Tell that bull to someone else.
Ronita there at Bose house is running her own detective agency for her husband.
She spies on Saurabh's phone where the person is asking if he liked it and she was sure that he will like it a lot.
Me: Definitely honeymoon planning. That's how these kind of things turn out. Lekin, aaj kal bahuon ko Sherlock Holmes se training leke aana padta hain kya? Matlab pehle to gharwale sirf ghar ka kaam sikhake bhejte the. Ab lagta hain detective ka training deke bhejna padega.
Saurabh comes there and catches Ronita with his phone. She says that her phone didn't have network so she was using his. Saurabh tells her to ask before using his phone. His important message might get deleted.
Ronita gets worried.
Me: #Facepalm on unnecessary drama. Moving on...
Saurabh gets ready to leave. Ronita asks where is he going.
He says that he is going to office.
Ronita asks if he is only going to office or somewhere else?
Saurabh says that he was supposed to meet a friend.
Ronita asks him her name.
Saurabh says Kanika.
Ronita says that he never talked about her.
Saurabh asks if she is having problem. Ronita denies.
Saurabh gets happy to think she is jealous.
Ronita also makes up a male friend who was interested in her. But she says that she said no to him.
Saurabh says why? It's necessary to meet old friends.
Ronita doesn't like that. She probes some more. But Saurabh says that they are married. But they should trust each other. What they feel for them matter more.
Ronita doesn't agree and goes away angry.
Me: Actually, Ronita. You just fell in love. But trust me, what Saurabh said is 100% correct. What others feel for you it doesn't matter, what you feel for your life partner, that's more important. If you don't trust your life partner to be faithful to you, then you are only waiting for the other shoe to drop.
And if you trust the person you married, what any other person feels for them doesn't matter. Because the person is in love with you and chose you, not them.
If they don't want to be with you, doubting on them won't keep them with you and if they don't want to live without you, then doubting on them will only harm your relationship.
Dev is on call with a detective and still looking for the family when Sona comes there. She asks if her mother came there.
Dev says yes. He asks if she called her.
Sona says no.
Dev says that it is surprising that she dropped in unannounced.
Sonakshi says that surprising thing is that he allowed her to come in.
Dev says not to start all this. And if she counts score, then they are still equal. He allowed her mother to come there (as his friend) and they allowed Elena to go there (as his friend).
Me: Sure, both are allowed as his friend.
Sonakshi asks if she said anything.
Dev says that she didn't say anything. She just said that she was missing Soha and just came in.
Sona asks if that's all that happened.
Dev says that she knows how Mami and Vicky are. They reacted the way they always do. So everything was normal. Why is she asking question? She is Soha's grandmother. She was missing Soha so she came there.
Sona says that her mother said the same thing to her. But why would she say this?
Dev says that come on. Not again. Do women like to be detectives? Why do they make simple things complicated? Every word has four meaning, it's not necessary naa. Can't they think simple like men?
Then he proceeds to say every stereotypical thing he knows about man and woman gender differences. Stereotypical, that is. Which means, some are similar, most are not.
Sona says okay okay. Enough enough. She knows that he has done thesis on women in the last 7 years. But no need to give such long lectures.
He agrees that this is between her and her mother.
He gets a call and moves away to take it.
Me: You are on point, behena. But think a little more Sona. I am sure you will get it.
Elena comes to Sona and Sona asks if she knows why her mother come there? She could have gone to dance class to meet Soha.
Elena stammers and says that she had called Asha. She says that she thought her and Dev...
Dev hears Sona's voice and listens by the door.
Sona gets angry: Are you mad? You made up something in your head and told mother.
Elena asks what's wrong in that? She had been noticing that their differences are getting reduced so she thought that she should...
Me: Allow me to finish your sentence. Use this golden opportunity to get my agenda filled. Right, Elena? The fact that you can't even see anything wrong in interfering in someone else's personal business when you absolutely got mad when Sonakshi interfered in your and Vicky's business before you ran away, just tells me how much of a Dixit you have become.
Let me make it more clear for you and feel free to relay it to your darling Mashi... MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS!!!
Sona says that has she got mad? She is worried for Dev. But nothing more than that and you...
Elena stammers: Sona, you three...
Sona: And you made up stories in your head and told mother. You could have talked to me first.
Elena: And like you would have told me everything. Isn't it?
Me: Is this girl for real? If Sona doesn't want to talk about her personal relationship, then she should not have to. Specially to you with your own eff-ed up relationships. So butt out.
Sona: When two strangers live together, they care for each other. We had relationships and the proof is in Soha. But there is nothing else between them.
Elena says that okay fine. She should not have spoken to Asha.
Sona says that of course she should have spoken to Asha. Now she has to speak to her and get everything cleared up about what is going on. She has to say that Dev is in trouble and she is involved somehow.
She says that she has to sort this out. She picks up her bag and leaves.
Dev listens everything with a hang dog expression. But tries to moveaway when Sona storms out of the room. But she sees him.
Me: Sona, I am totally getting your anger on Elena and Asha's interference.
But let me say something here. Girl, you are giving mixed signals. In some places, these kind of people are called tease.
If you truly think of Bhaiya as a buddy, then why are you flirting with him?
Why did you even once let Elena interfere in your life when you should have told her to butt out the moment she opened her mouth for the first time to give you advice?
You let her interfere then and now she thinks that she has singlehandedly cemented her popularity in both family by making two favourite children happy.
The fact that she dared to gossip about you to Asha was thanks to you.
On the other hand, if you don't want Bhaiya to get any ideas, stop flirting with him. If you feel nothing except friendly care, treat him like you treat Jatin.
As I said before, either put up or shut up. Stop confusing people.
Sona calls Dev.
Dev says that he is going to pick up Soha. Sona says that she came early because she was going to pick up Soha. He said that he was missing Soha so he will pick her up.
Sonakshi agrees. She says then she will do her work.
Dev is worried that Sonakshi might tell Asha about his mother.
Me: Bhaiya, if she hadn't tell even you about your mother until she had to, I doubt she will blab it to her mother. So you can rest assured that it isn't going to happen. If that's your only concern, then you are fine.
PRECAP: Sona is telling Asha that Elena and her was wrong. There is nothing between them. He was in a problem and she was helping him like he helped them on Saurabh's sangeet.
Asha says that she won't say anything again. She asks that she didn't tell her what was Dev's problem.
Sona stays silent.
Bhaiya is spying through the window. Yep, the same window through which Bijoy spied on him and Asha, C-O-O-K-I-N-G...
Me: Sasur aur damad same to same che. Lekin Asha, yaad rakhna aur lecture bandh rakhna. Let your adult daughter handle her life.
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