PLEASE READ

ONE OF MY FRIEND FWD THIS TO ME SO I HAD TO SHARE IT WITH ALL OF YOU:

This is one back for the men out there...

No sex tonight?

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so
much.
And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing.
I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with
their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't
feel
like it, I just want you to hold me."

I said "WHAT????!!! What was that?!" So she says the words that every
boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear..."You're just not in touch with
my
emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs
as
a man."
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for
who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with
her.
We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed

department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several
different very expensive outfits.
She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'll just buy them

all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets
get a
pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewellery department where she
picked out a pair of diamond earrings.

Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was one
wave
short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she
asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play
tennis.
I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey."
She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier." I could hardly contain myself when I
blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled
WHAT???!!!" I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this
stuff
for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man
enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."
And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I
added,
"Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy
you?"
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.