queen_rumz thumbnail
Groupbie Thumbnail Engager Level 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 17 years ago
#1

FF: O Re Piya

Characters: Same as the show!

This is my first Fan-fic. I was jobless so had some ideas. This part may be boring so please forgive me! I'm gonna start from where Thursday's episode left off...

Part I

It was midnight and Prem was still in his office thinking about Manmeet and his so called "raaz".

Prem (thinks): Manmeet hum sab se kya chup raha hoga? Aisi kaunsi baat hai jo who hume nahin bata sakta? Mujhe pata lagana hoga par kise? Kahin Heer .ko kuch..?

It was getting late so he packed his things and went home.

When he reached home all the lights were off and everyone was sound asleep in their rooms except for one person's….Heer!

He thought it was the right time to go and talk to her.

As he approached the room he was nervous but also happy that he was going to meet her. He knocked on the door.

Heer: Is waqt kaun ho sakta hai?

She goes to open the door and to her surprise she finds Prem there.

Prem: Woh…who…mujhe tumse kuch baat karni hain.

Heer: Ji..kahiye.

Prem: Hum kahin aur baat kar sakte hain?

Heer: Lekin kahan?

Prem: Terrace par.

Heer: Theek hain.

On the terrace:

Prem: Mujhe Manmeet ke bare mein kuch batana hain. Tumko aise nahin lagta ke Manmeet hum sabse kuch chupa raha hain? Uske bartaav kuch theek nahin lagte. Aur phir aaj party mein bhi woh ladki kuch keh rahi thi. Kya usne tumhe kuch bataya?

Heer: Nahin toh. Hum dono ne baat bhi nahin kari aaj.

Prem: Tum shure ho na? Agar kuch aisi baat ho toh mujhe batana. Mujhe tumse kuch aur bhi kehna hai…hamare bare mein.

At that moment Prem took her hands in his and with the other hand pulled her towards him by her waist. They were just looking each other…lost in each others eyes. Heer felt as if she just skipped a heartbeat looking into those brown muddy eyes.

Prem: Main kuch hamare baare mein batana chata hoon. Tumhe nahin lagta hamare beech mein kuch hain. Jab bhi hum saath mein hote hain toh kuch kuch hota hain lekin jab hum saath mein nahin hote toh ek pal bhi aisa nahin hain jab main tumhare bare mein nahin sochta. Aisa kyun lagta hain? Kahin yeh..

--The End--

Well there it is my first part! Hope you liked it…if you ppl think I should continue or change something please do leave comments..!! I need all the support I can get!

Edited by queen_rumz - 17 years ago

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-Jwalamukhi- thumbnail
18th Anniversary Thumbnail Engager Level 4 Thumbnail + 9
Posted: 17 years ago
#2
Awww...Prem and Heer terrace scene...beautiful 👏
TheLastCarnival thumbnail
18th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 5
Posted: 17 years ago
#3
gr8 start...I will write a lamba chauda appreciative piece and edit 😉 !!!
Noor.T thumbnail
20th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 17 years ago
#4
great start hun 👏 👏 do continue soon 😃 😃 😃
Lady_Impala thumbnail
17th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail Commentator Level 2 Thumbnail
Posted: 17 years ago
#5
nice start 👏 .......waah kya scene hai terrace ka 😳 😳 😉 .please do continue
khan-anam thumbnail
18th Anniversary Thumbnail Voyager Thumbnail
Posted: 17 years ago
#6
nice job....plz continue soon.... 😊
ziana thumbnail
18th Anniversary Thumbnail Navigator Thumbnail
Posted: 17 years ago
#7
really nice
keep it up

waiting 4 the next part
Nupur9 thumbnail
18th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail
Posted: 17 years ago
#8
If this is your first FF......then it's hard to believe...coz you have a way to simply & clearly state the thoughts.....
Attempt to write an entire piece at one go so that readers can take the luft of what you are trying to convey.... 😊
I would very much like to read more of what will happen next in your FF.....
~Nupur~
HC_ROX thumbnail
Posted: 17 years ago
#9
no words to describe it
just awesome
plz continue fast waiting for the next part
Faima_PremHeer thumbnail
Explorer Thumbnail
Posted: 17 years ago
#10
very interesting cnt wait for the next prt

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