New SS: Tanhai Part 9 pg69 Dec 27 - Page 52

Originally posted by: jnawaz

Before I start, this is the first time that I am reading and writing the comments simultaneously..ek saath hi padh ke likh rahi hoon..so please bear with my differnt emotions that I will be expressing in quite a clear way throughout this update..😆

NOTE: this is the longest part of the story...i swear it came out to a full 30pgs on microsoft word! so i wanna see looong comments Big smile
ok...I m on to the job 😃
Part 9

Heer woke up to the soft, yet distinct tapping of a tree branch up against her window. Turning her face towards where the noise was coming from she saw that there was still light out, though it was quickly diminishing. Sitting up she felt a very slight throbbing in her head. She glanced at the clock to see that it was half past five.

I love this starting..I dont know why...Maybe coz it is so... real..The setting is so simple compared the the dhamaka we had in the last update...When I read it, it was like, we left at a point where there was avalanche of emotions...and the next thing is absolute calm..U may think i m crazy jaz but I somehow loved this setting and the start.
Now Heer remembered what had happened. She had gone upstairs to get the earrings that she had bought for her sister. While she was looking in her drawer she heard Veera suddenly call for her. Heer figured that it was just Veera being Veera impatient. A really nice line.."veera being veera"...a very common phrase with our closed ones that we use so frequently..Had me in a "awww" kind of smile.

When she finally did, she was stunned. It was like time had unexpectedly stopped, her heart stopped beating and she stopped breathing. There he was ? after seven long years ? he was back.
Ya my heart too stopped breathing..Couldn't contain the excitement of having heer see him..Oh my...Seriously I cannot fathom what a person in this situation actually feels..maybe infinite joy and absolute faith in God...

However, it was him, it was her Prem. There was no mistaking it. His identity was in his eyes. *melting..I am absolutely melting*
Heer had seen into those eyes a million times, she had seen into his soul through his eyes. She knew these eyes. The eyes were the same as they had been for years. The eyes were filled with joy. The eyes were filled with love ? for her.
I cannot prevent the tears that are falling..I mean..Oh God! I m happy and sad...Dunno why i feel sad...Its just that they loved each other so so sooo much and then got separated for 7 yrs..Phew..7 years..it's a loooooong time..And even after 7 years they both love each other with this much intensity..Oh!God bless this love..I absolutely love this kind of love...That balraaj, sarphira buddha🤢😡

Without realizing it, her hand flew up to her mouth to cover her shock. Was Prem really back? How could that be? Had it all been real or a dream?
I am trying to imagine the terror that thought must have invoked in heer...Just imagine getting back the biggest and the most imp thing in ur life and then realizing it is a dream..Thank God it was not a dream otherwise 😭

Heer leaned against one of the pillars and fell to the floor as tears over took her emotions. She sat with her knees drawn up to her body and her head resting on her arms.She had been wrong. Prem wasn't back. It must have been another one of her hallucinations or something. Why was her mind and heart playing tricks on her like that? Not like it wasn't hard enough to get past every minute without Prem, but to see him and think that he is real. Then only to find out he was still gone ? it was heart breaking.
Thats what I meant previously...ouch..I can feel her pain at this time..maybe its even worse than loosing him before..Then she did not know what pain she will endure for the rest of her life..now she knows..and to think that the pain is gone for ever and then to realise it's just a dream...Aaaa..pain and more pain..😭Thank u for bringing him back jaz...

"Heer," someone called.
My heart is beating so fast...thud thud thud..

Looking up Heer saw the door to the family room open and a tall figure step out.When the man finally stood in front of her, Heer was left speechless. She climbed to her feet and came face to face with the man who had lived in her dreams and nightmares for seven years.
Such a wonderful line...'awwwww' all the way...its beautiful..👏
Heer's mouth was left gaping open with one hand over it, as the tears once again collected in her eyes.
Tears of joy..same in heer's eyes as in mine...Wonderfull😊

"Heer," he said again, "Main aagaya hoon. Tumhara Prem laut aaya hai.""Prem?" Heer chocked between tears and sobs. "Tum saach ho, ya phirse main koi saapna dekh rahi hoon?"Prem smiled, is eyes too wet from tears. "Chuke dekhlo," he said as he held his hand out to her.Reluctantly and very carefully Heer reached out to him. What if he disappeared? What if he wasn't real? Slowly she brushed her finger tips to his palm and was amazed when she felt his warmth and strength.
Yay!!!!!!! I mean wohooo!!!!!!!!!Cannot describe the happiness I feel at the rush of joy and relief that heer must have felt...wao...

As soon as his lips touched her skin Heer felt her body, her heart and her soul come back to life. It was almost magical.
😃 again Awwwwwwww....This is love..



"Manmeet, doctor ko phone kaar. Jaldi." Prem ordered as he scooped Heer up into his arms and raced towards her room."Ji Bhaia," Manmeet said as he pulled out his cell phone.

😲

Everyone stood stunned and shocked into disbelief at what Manmeet had just said.
Me too...this was a shocker...in a good way but still shocker nevertheless..

"Kuch bhi pehen ke aao, lekin yeh nahin. Tumhe inn safed kapde mein dekh kar mujhe taqlif hota hai. Tum meri vidva nahin ho, meri biwi ho tum," he said as he placed a kiss on her forehead.
He is a sweet heart..wonderful wonderful guy...😃

Veera walked upstairs with Heer. As they ascended the stairs, not once did Heer take her eyes off of Prem.
Cant blame her...How in the world can she ever take her eyes off him now...Oh My...this is one heck of a FF...I feel so much just through a single line..I cannot become a greater fan of urs than this jaz..waoo

In the midst of arguing with Heer's pompous brothers, Prem head a voice calling to him. The voice wasn't loud and almost drowned out in the commotion that was going on in front of him. However, this was voice that he heard from his heart. No matter where he was, if he heard that voice he was immediately at full attention.
Wonderfully written words...ya..thats the beauty of their love..thats the beauty of any love.."this was the voice that he heard from his heart"...hmm.I cannot help but read it again and again...seriously touching..and thank u.

He knew what it was ? it was Heer's mangalsutra. It was the same simple black and gold necklace that he had bought for her seven years ago.As Prem put the mangalsutra on Heer, it was like the rest of the room disappeared. It was just them two and no one else. Prem could envision Heer in her red shaadi-ka-joda on the day of their wedding. He could hear the pundit chanting the sacred hymns as they walked around the holy fire. He could remember the blush on Heer's face when he filled her mang. He could remember the happiness in her eyes when they were finally married in the eyes of God. It was like they were transported to the small mandir where they had been married years ago.
Ooh wao...really lovely..loved this setting, this feel, these emotions..Like i ve said countless times before, jaz u r fabulous with the words and sentences...and they just evoke the right emotions...the "feel" to all this is really really nice and thats the beauty of this FF..this feeling of emotions at every stage..pain,love,happiness,surprise,anger, hatred...really really a great job that u have done here..


He saw Heer place a hand over her mangalsutra and heard her whisper a thanks to God for returning to Prem to her.
and I whisper my thanks to u jaz..😆


*~* Flash Back *~*

(7 years ago)

(Prem = 20)

The whole setting was excellent...Dr singh and the whole family is so nice..these days these type of people are so rare but they are there nevertheless...
The way you described his pain and his suffering , i was really saddened..poor guy..just imagine not knowing who you are...*shivers*. No punishment can be bigger than this...no wait..heer got the bigger punishment.....anyways, the bond between the 5 people was awesome..how nice of Mrs singh to consider him as her own son and ask to come with them..I also liked manmeet and priya's role..so sweet..just like 2 younger siblings.cute but naughty...😃

*~* Back to Present *~*

"Veera ki zindagi mein, maine hi Manmeet ko beja tha," Prem said.
ok..Another shocker...😲

"Kyun ke jaab mera yadash vapas aagaya tha, tab hi maine faisla kaar liya tha ke joh Heer ke saath hua hai, woh meri Chulbulli ke saath nahin hoga," Prem said as he got up and went over to where Veera was sitting. He placed a hand on her head and said, "Veera ke zindagi barbad hote hue main nahin dekh sakta tha. Issi liyeh, jaan buj kaar maine Priya ke dosti Veera se karvaiya aur phir dhere dhere Manmeet ko bhi Veera se milaya. Mujeh pata the ke dono ek dusre ke liyeh perfect hai."
awwwwwwwww.........awwwwwwwww....can he be more perfect...OMG...this guy is just out if this world yaar..oh my...what a human being...

*~* Flash Back *~*

ok..dying to know how does he remember his past..and what triggers it..

(3 years ago)

(Prem = 24, Manmeet = 19 & Priya = 16; Heer = 22 & Veera = 16)
"Aapni Maa ke liyeh itna nahin kaar sakta tu?" she asked.
This is the fav line of all mothers throughout the world..I m telling u...a mother says these words and there is no way n heck that you can refuse practically anything..poor prem..😆


"Veera, dekh naa ke Heer kahaan hai," one of them said.
My heart is going dhak-dhak at the speed of a rocket!

When the woman mentioned the name 'Heer', Prem felt his heat give a funny jump. 😆😃

"Aare aunty, iss mein thanks kis baath ki? Mujhe toh aana hi tha," someone said.


Prem immediately stopped what he was doing. That voice, it sounded so familiar. Prem turned his head in the direction that the voice was coming in but couldn't see the person who had just spoken.
Oh my..turn heer turn..the love of ur life is trying to look at ur face...shucks..she left....Aarrrgh....so close...

However, try as he might, that voice and that name refused to leave him. The rest of the night he kept thinking about that name and kept hearing the sound of her voice ringing in his ears. That entire night he couldn't sleep, every time he closed his eyes the voice played in his ears.
Yay.....common prem..common..listen to ur heart...Oh I am dying with excitement here..




Prem listened as the music began slowly with the sound of violins. Then the singer came on, and he took in the lyrics.
Oh! Finally...clap clap...oh thank god...I mean thank Jaz...what a relief yaar....phew....Yay...he remembers her...
I like the way he rushes from his room and asks her mother first..such a sensible guy..not coming to conclusions without verifying the facts...and then he exclaims that he is "heer's prem"..Awww such a romantic and thud-yy line..and then the way he runs to her house..so darn adorable and emotional yaar..


There she was, his beautiful bride ? dressed in white.
😭 Sigh...What this line does to me...😭😭
He couldn't believe his eyes. To this day, she was mourning his death when he wasn't even dead. At an age when she should be adorned with colors and jewelry, she was dressed in plain, blank clothing. At an age when all she should know is happiness and joy, there were tears and pain in her eyes. Prem nearly jumped through the window to go to her, but was stopped when Veera entered.
😭😭 The pain that these two went through...Oh my heart pains...And that Balraaj😡..

*~* Back to Present *~*


As if on cue, in walked Balraj ? from the look on his face, he was not too happy.
But we are so darnned happy..u rotten egg😡

"What is the meaning of this?" Balraj yelled as he threw a file on the center table. "Aapne aapko kya samajte ho Preet Mehta!?"Balraj went on to explain how he spent the last few hours at his lawyers office attempting to gain all of Mehta Industries. According to the contract Preet had signed over 100% of Mehta Industries to Balraj. However, when his lawyer went to make all the necessary arrangements to get everything officially in Balraj's name, he ran into a problem.
This prem munda is so very smart....clap clap...ab aaya maza u laalchi khadoos insaan..


As Prem reiterated the entire story, Balraj sank into a chair next to him. Prem also informed him that starting tomorrow, any and all companies that Maan Industries had contracts with would be pulling out and terminating the agreements. By the end of the week Maan Industries would be nothing but a memory of what had once been a staggering empire.
Oh...good for balraaj but then what will happen to the brothers..??umm..think something for them jaz...afterall they are not so bad..😆


"Baas itna hi nahin aur bhi hai," Prem teased. "Aap ko Heer aur Veera se nafrat issiliyeh hai naa kyun ke woh dono ladkiyaan hai? Aapko yehi lagta hai naa ke aurtein useless hai? Toh mera ek aur baath bhi sunlijiyeh. Mere naam joh kuch bhi hai?business, properties, bank accounts?saab?Heer ke naam pe hai. Mere paas toh ek photi kaudi bhi nahin hai, lekin aapki iss beti karorpati hai."
"Maine bhi aapna saab kuch Veera ke naam pe kardiya hai," Manmeet announced shocking their audience even more.
Oh..I wish I could put some dancing emoticon here...isse kehte hain "ab aaya unth pahaad ke nichey"...hahaha..oh I am trying to imagine how he must be looking..all red and green...yay...Finally justice


"Tum shayad aapna ateet bhul sakte ho lekin main nahin. Aaj bhi log Vikram Oberoi ka izzat karte hai. Aur main vaada karti hoon, ke aagar maine aur mere bachoone tumhe sadak paar lekar aayenge. Aagar maine aaisa nahin kiya, toh mera naam bhi Teji Oberoi nahin," she threatned.
Oh..cant take any more happines...Woot woot....yay woman..go..show that slimy male chauvinist pig what u and ur bachha log can do...👏

"Now get out!" Teji ordered.
Now toh I am pakka dead...she ordered him put...get out...I mean, I got my treat....Hurray!!


Veera got up and walked to where her husband, Manmeet, stood with her brothers."Tumhara naam?" Veera laughed, "?tumhara naam Mannu hai!"
Oh I cannot help but burst into laughter ...this is excellent storytelling..wao..after such an emotional and serious scene, a funny and light hearted moment...Lovely..👏

As Manmeet cringed everyone else burst into laughter. Heer tried to fight it but couldn't, she too laughed whole heartedly.
😆 me too...

The entire time, Heer held onto his hand, not once letting go. It was like she feared that if she let go, he would disappear.
I know...I can feel all the emotions...And again for the nth time today..Yay!!

That night Heer cried, like she did almost every night, except this night was different. This night she didn't cry tears of pain, she cried tears of happiness and joy. For the first time in a long time Heer looked forward to the dawning of a new day because, with Prem by her side once again, she knew everything would be alright.
I am also crying coz of sheer happiness..and I dont think any FF has ever made me cry this much..either of happiness or of sadness...*sniff*...Oh..these 2 are together...wao..

The End
U still have at least one more update to write, right?? like an epilogue..?? please say yes..I wanna keep reading ur FFs...

JAZ

awesome.............

but Premeer romance is most awaited

Hey jaz! Well me back to comment!! 😃😃First of all Happy New Year to you!! 😊 Now coming back to the update! As usual it was just awesome!👏👏 I loved the way u started with Heer waking up and trying to recall what had happened' the desperate search through the house for her love and than admitting defeat in front of her God was tremendously executed' I really liked the way she looked up and stared in confusion at the red spot and then as if in a daze ran her hand over her parting to discover the red color finally realizing much to her relief that all of it was not a dream and her love Prem was truly and finally back to her!👏⭐️ That bit was really touching' their meeting and the way she wonderingly touched his face again to make sure that he was in flesh and blood and not just a figment of her imagination' and Prem's fury and anger at her brothers was too good! I cld actually feel his rage at them for making his wife suffer a slow and painful death each year.. it was clearly evident tht he was not angry at them for hurting and almost killing him but his anger was for Heer and thats wat I loved the most' the revelations that followed were truly surprising and caught me off guard wen I read tht manmeet was involved! 😲It was very much believable... the injuries u described and the reason for his loss of memory was very good and I always love it wen logic and facts are involved as these things are rarely shown in tv drama's especially BT serials😆 ..I just loved the predicament of Prem's condition and his becoming a part of manmeets family' everything was falling into place then.. The way he heard Heer's name and felt a pang in his heart ' reviving a relation so old yet so profound.. so beautiful! 😳😳It was beautifully described although I would have loved to read a flashback of that dance😊'. And finally the way he became Preet Mehta from Prem Juneja onli to fight for justice and teach a lesson to the wrongdoers! I really liked the way u made a connection to Prem keeping his name Preet onli coz Heer gave that name to her niece and it meant love just like Prem although I love the sound of Prem more'😳

And finally tht Balraj! U dunno how happy I was after reading tht teji threw him! twirls arnd happily he deserves more thn tht u noe!😡😡 I still cant believe tht sad excuse of a husband and a father threatened to kill their mother if they didn't follow his orders! Prem's role in tht part was awesome! 👍🏼How he won over tht man finally achieving wat he had wanted and now I am just waiting for a very romantic epilogue since these two didn't even have a suhaaag raat! Poor guys! Anyway I have done my bit as a faithful reader and this repli has gotten quite long so now I want a long, hot , romantic part of Premeer!!😳😳😉 No excuses this time Jaz! All in all the update was awesome! Took up 21 pgs on my MS office! 😲😃

Hats off to u for writing such a wonderful FF!👍🏼 and sori abt tht cheating part.. cldnt help myself😛😆' update soon! Take care

Love

hiba

hey jaz

how r u?

I know mene thoda late reply kiya, par kiya toh sahi aur tumhare next update se pehle kar diya, yeh bhi toh socho😉, so enough with my excuses here is the long that you expect from me, I hope I met your expectations😆

jaz you described heer's emotions brilliantly, one way she was ecstatic to meet her prem and another moment when she didn't find him she was shattered. It was like one of her illusions that he is with her, and when it tuned out to be reality she was disheartened. For once her hopes were lifted and then later she was dejected as ever. But I am wondering where is everyone, have they planned like a wedding for premeer or something spl is planned by prem for her. I was imagining every moment you described. I smiled when prem said ki chuke dekhlo, wow jaz it was so gud, atlast our prem is back. I am so happy atlast lovers will be united.

I liked the way heer innocently asked him again and again that he was actually present or not. I loved it jaz. When heer felt her body, heart and soul came to life and it was magical, jaz you described so much in such a simple words but the words were magnificently described. You described her feeling so perfectly. So beautifully. I loved prem's possessiveness when he said to her brothers that none of them would touch heer. well he has a right to do that. ya rgt they hv done enough for her, its time for prem now…whoopie😆 you know when prem talked to manmeet, I was confused how he knew him and you answered it in next line. Truly jaz even I was shocked like mann family😆.even though she had been away from him for so long, but she still could read his eyes, this true love, nothing could come between lovers.

Wow jaz so gud, that prem couldn't see her in white clothes, so gud choice of words, wonderful👏👏 it felt so gud jaz when prem rightfully said that she is not his widow rather she is his wife, she had waited so long for this moment. he finally got his heer, and by wearing that saree heer proved that she hadn't forgotten anything about him, that everything related to him hold special place in his heart, she knew wearing this saree would make prem know what he means for her. ok jaz I am not sure if you meant to convey this or not but I felt this so described it😃

Mann brothers ko kuch aur kaam nahi hia, yahan prem heer ko check out karne mein laga hia, aur vo ladai karne pe tule hia😆, guys give them some time alone, let our prem look at heer in peace for sometime, you can give your due explanations in remaining time. When heer blushed I had a feeling that she never got that happiness, those feelings which a new bride feel, now it is her day to feel it, atlast she got her happiness. Oh ho toh time stopped, they felt nobody ard, Well they actually didn't need anyone, baki toh extra hai yaz😉😆😆 kar dina mood karab manmeet ne, don't worry prem abhi they are hell bound to disturb you soon you will be alone with your heer, and jaz make sure then none of these extras disturb them😆

Wow you are so daring, gud better not care about who saw you prem, this was so long awaited jaz. Ahem..ahem bas yahan suhaag raat mat manana, who thoda awkward ho jayega family members ke liye😆 I know jaz you want to kill me rgt now, I am converting your emotional scene into comedy one😆, par kya karu prem itne dinu ke baad aaya hia, toh mujhse raha nahi gaya, such funny and inttg reply was also long overdue😆 well jaz balraj deserved to be missing, otherwise he would ruined this moment too🤢 such a lovely line jaz, that jis duniya mein heer zinda hai, vo duniya prem kaise chod ke jaa sakta hia, I wonder how he stayed away from her. did he lose his memory jaz, that's why he didn't remember? Wait let me read further.

jaz he cared so much for her, even though he is dieing, he is extreme pain all he could think about his heer, about her wellbeing, so touchy jaz😆 jaz if people found him and took him to hospital then what about premeer frds who informed heer that he is dead and they have cremated his body😕 I was even confused how nurse knew his name but then you answered this ques later on. I liked the way prem and singh family got attached to each other and how manmeet and priya got prem to agree to come with them to Mumbai.

Prem is so caring for heer family too, he is one who got manmeet in veera's life bcos he didn't wanted another heer in her. too gud jaz really gud ideas. For all those years he had no idea what pain, torture heer was going on without him, he has so carefree and trouble free life for those four years, he had no idea that heer yearned here for him. I was lol when he hard about prem getting married if heer knew this she would hv killed him again, I wonder what look she gave him when prem told her this😆 I laughed gain when you said that first prem groaned and then it was turn of priya and manmeet to the same when their mother told thm that they should learn something form their elder brother. Jaz he has mixed so well between them.😃 wow jaz I liked the idea that heer had been the reason behind prem getting back his memory. The way you described as an intense lover, one who wouldn't leave those people who hurt his heer, I was reminded of old days of kis, only if those days could come bk.

Wow now even teji stood against balraj, well he deserved it, I was laughing when teji told him to shut up. Balraj is really disgusting, even though once he was in the same situation still he couldn't understand heer's situation. Wow I loved her attitude, balraj truly deserves this. now is the time that he will face heat of his actions. Jaz I smiled when prem said that there will be no 'tanhai' in heer's life now.

Finally jaz I was not crying bcos of ur update, I loved so much I loved every moment of reading it. tumne kitna rolaya hai humein, par khushiyan bhi tum hi dogi😃 so jaz you better hv full epiliogue dedicated to premeer romance and that too not less than 50 pages, shocked huh, well itna toh tum kar hi sakti ho hamare annso ke liye😆, ok relax write as much you want but it should be really long, bcos you hv made us wait quite long for it. thanx jaz for bringing prem bk, love you.🤗

Tk care

Sia