rainydays. thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#1

Hello Hello

Here's a poem by Shifali! If you're wondering why I'm posting it, it's because she thinks the poem sucks but I think its awesome and I'm sure you all agree with me😃
The poem is based on Prem Heer and is called Lost.
Enjoy!

Lost
Slowly, Quietly
I wait for you,
in my balcony
Hushingly, Sadly
I look up at
the clear dark sky
Waiting and waiting
for you to arrive
Looking at the road
to see it blank,
just like my life
and you somewhere lost
that I can't see
Where are you?
Where are you?
Won't you come and
sweep me off my feet
and wisper in my ears, those 3 magical words
that will make tears slide down my eyes
just like ice-cream on a hot summer day
Come, my eyes await,
the homecoming of you
Don't leave me,
alone in this cruel world
like you did before...
Slowly, Quietly
I wait for you in my balcony...
Keeping my eyes placed right,
at the clear desserted road
for a ray of hope,
that will make me cope
from my lost life
Lost, a word that I know inside out.
Lost so many things in life,
that I don't want to loose you
Hushling, Sadly
I look up at
the clear dark sky
Slowly, Quietly
I wait for you
in my balcony
The end
Edited by *Shifali* - 16 years ago

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indiandoll89 thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#2
Even though Shifali didn't believe me the first time....this was just so beautiful! 😃

And the title was perfectly apt! 😳😛

Thanks for posting Ravs! 😃
rainydays. thumbnail
17th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 16 years ago
#3
Yes yes Shifali main posted kar dehta. Tu ki socheya? Ke main odahi kehndi si?
I feel so proud of myself
And I'm reserving this =)
Aanandaa thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#4
Awesome work Shiffs bacha...why did you think it wasn't good enough *belen*

I don't like your way of selling yourself for less...😒

Ravz...thank you sooo much for not listening to her and posting it here....🤗

Bini311 thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#5
really good poem...so simple but so touching:)

Edited by Bini311 - 16 years ago
Pyari_Zahra thumbnail
18th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail + 5
Posted: 16 years ago
#6
So simple yet so beautiful Shifali!! I loved it!! You need to have more faith in yourself- how many times have I told you?! You want me to come after you with a belan like Raksha Di did? 😆 It was a lovely poem!! xx
Posted: 16 years ago
#7
Awww di that was so sweet! I really liked it - very simple but that was the beauty of it!! Write more peoms!! =] And thanks Ravz for posting!

--shabz
Captain_Pari thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#8
That was soooooooo cute!! totally loved it!!!
Shifu it was totally awesome!!! Ravz really glad u posted it!!! :P:D
sourpuss thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#9
Aww Shifs! You write poetry too! And Ravz had to put it up for you? *shakes head* Anyway, this was seriously so melancholic! I'd go into an entire Lit-y analysis, but I never was very good at analyzing poetry! 😆 But really though. This is the kind of thing that I wanted to write, only in one-shot form, where Heer's waiting for Prem and he's not showing up. So perfect.
🤗 Thanks for posting this, Ducky! (Gosh I love calling you that! It makes me smile...)
Love,
Bhav (:
Anhdara13 thumbnail
17th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail + 3
Posted: 16 years ago
#10
Shifu! First FFs, then VMs, now poetry?? You Jane of many trades! Thanks Ravzie, for posting this. It needed to be posted. It's so sweet, and sad. And expressed their situation so perfectly.

Write more poems.

Love,
Radz

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