FF-Till death do us apart.Last part pg63 - Page 8

Originally posted by: sareeta

Alrightie, am back to chip in my thoughts abt Part 5. About time darling.😊

Muneeza ji, maafi chaahti hoon... was too tired and lazy to type in all the comments ... the day I read it! But am a good girl .. I read it as soon as you posted it... so guess.. I can be maaf karofied hai na?! 😉 Arey aapki har khata maaf after all aap bhi to eik adad leykhakh hain....I realize time is the essence.😊

First off, I am always in awe of people, who can maintain the thread of thought with respect to different characters in a story. To weave a story around the protagonists is an obvious expectation, but to be able to have supporting characters involved in the story and also run a parallel track or in this case, include subtle details... where the reader connects with each of the supporting characters and their psyche is something I am in awe of and find it extremely commendable. My being awe might also stem in from my own incapability to go beyond two characters when I think or pen down something... guess its jus me! Hmm now that you mention it I always think a few characters here and there gives a whole new look to the text...cuz if that wudn't exist the story wud end up looking like a dialogue or even less monologue....besides am just too much in love with Prem Lata....I absolutely love her character.😳 just makes me wish I have a mother in law like her. yeah well I know I'm dreaming...😆

Secondly, I liked the description of subtle details that triggered his irritation , and also at a later point added to his chagrin... Again my point of interpretation while reading countless books I find the background imagery very comfortable.. Some writers prefer to leave the reader to create his own thoughts about the scenario but the perfectionist that I am I love detailed intricate text one that captures the essence of the scene.😊


One thing that struck me and which I thought conveyed a lot more than it was intended to, was the line..."Jo khareed na hai jaldi khareed le..." I think every woman somewhere would connect with this line at some point... that leaves her... wanting her hubby's attention, and then letting go, jus being happy that even a moment or two that they spared was what mattered! .... The line for encapsulated, the entire essence of a wife's longing and a Husband's lack of time, but also his attempt to not displease her....Now here's the true writer's point of view....it's amazing how one line can speak volumes.. I wanted the line to create an effect of hurried dispatch yet a considerable amount of concern for the latter ....subtle yet prominent in it's own way ...😊

The rest of the story and details were something, that more in sync with the track of the story and easy to connect, but the above things were what struck me and I thought I'd make a mention! 😊

Hope I haven't been a bore ...NOPES NOT AT ALL you've been helpful and literally given me an insight on my writing...Thank you.😊

Originally posted by: sareeta

^^ Aaah, my friend, you do accept I have been a bore dont ya ! Oh woe is me!

Lol nopes you've been far far from a bore......rather a very loyal reader one who has the patience to bear my work....😊

Aww.....Muneeza darling,

Just caught up with part 6 dear....and it was superb👏.

So our Prachi did buy the saree he was fingering...I guessed as so....and am glad to be right.....😆

Aww...our duffer is still a duffer...Millis reaction to the Kurta was just superbly described....staying original to his character in the drama😉😆...great work girl..👏👏

Now what a romantic scene indeed😆....hope something like that does happen in the drama too😉...hair getting entangled in his kurta😳...but like in your FF....don't want Ayesha😡 to be anywhere near by......😆

So get writing dear...as can't wait to read part 7 soon.😆

Love

Krishna

Originally posted by: shananubis

Muneez, Just read part 6.

Awsome. I loved this part most of all. Prachi did buy the saree chosen by Milind 👏 👏 👏 I loved the way Milind reacted on seeing the kurta.. exactly like the Milind in serial and the remorse he felt after he knew she bought that for him. 👏 👏 Yeah his true essence is something that cannot be done away with...😊 would mar the character if done.Besides I wanted him to feel that she took notice of simple acts on his behalf ....

The way he asked "why do you do so much for me?" and the moment when they lokked in to each other's eyes they knew it was not over. Beautiful!!! 👏 My fav part I just had to make their eyes meet really love Shabbir's intense gaze in the serial 😊

Just at that moment Ayesha entered. Her thoughts reflected her character very clearly. More than the feeling of loosing Milind, her concern is for loosing him to Prachi. The twist eventually 😆

The whole part was beautifully penned. 👏 I enjoyed thoroughly..

Thx for the appreciation sweety.😊

Please continue soon.

Shan