FF: Forgiveness Part12: Pg37: 21/09 - Page 23

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Prachi put the phone down and stared blankly into space. "Prachi, what's wrong?" asked Neev looking at her concernedly. She was looking numb. "That was Sunil.", said Prachi trying to pull herself together. "Milind and I have to meet with a judge tomorrow to get our divorce finalized." "Wait, isn't Asha's custody hearing also tomorrow?" asked Neev. "Yes but it's after the divorce proceedings.", said Prachi feeling herself on the verge of tears as the reality of the situation started to hit her. After tomorrow her marriage would be over. "Prachi, are you sure you want to do this?", asked Neev gently, placing a hand on her shoulder. "I have to. What else am I supposed to do? Asha's custody, everything that happened, how are we supposed to go back '." said Prachi barely coherent as she was unable to stop her tears.

"What's going on?", asked Ayesha as she entered the room to see Prachi in tears. She put her arm around Prachi as she continued to sob, "I still love him. I don't what's wrong with me." "Prachi, listen to me.", said Neev, "You need to consider working things out with Milind." "Neev, what are you saying? For god sake, he had an affair with another woman and then left her." said Ayesha angrily. "I'm not excusing his behavior but we all know the circumstances under which that happened. Prachi, we all know how difficult a time you had after Kshama's death, ever consider Milind was going through the same thing?" asked Neev. "No because I couldn't cope with my pain, yet alone his. I wasn't there for him." replied Prachi remorsefully. "Prachi just talk him before it's too late." said Neev. "One way or another you need to resolve things."

"Better if she resolves things with Mallika first." muttered Ayesha under her breath. "What?" asked Prachi, turning around to look at her. "Nothing" said Ayesha hurriedly, noticing Neev glaring at her. "No repeat what you said." said Prachi. "Prachi you never confronted Mallika about what happened, you never even mention her which makes me think you have a lot of anger towards her that needs to be resolved before anything else." explained Ayesha. "Ayesha, this is not the time." said Neev exasperated. "No, this is exactly the time." said Prachi determindedly as she picked up her car keys.

As Prachi drove to Mallika's office, she realised Ayesha was right. She was holding onto so much of anger. Most of it had been directed at Milind deservedly so but her issues with Mallika stemmed from even before the accident. She remembered all the insecurity and jealousy she felt during her second pregnancy due to Mallika and Milind's close working relationship. Mallika was even the reason why they were arguing in the car before the accident happened. Prachi knew Mallika wasn't responsible for the accident but she did have to answer for sleeping with a married man who was grieving for his dead child.

"Prachi, I'm surprised to see you. What are you doing here?", asked Mallika as Prachi entered her office. Prachi looked at her incredulously. Even though it was over two years, she had expected some sort of guilt or regret on Mallika's part but there was not a trace of it on her face. Mallika was just looking at her blanky albeit slightly curiously. "Paying you a visit, I should have over two years ago." replied Prachi. "I'm sorry, I'm don't understand." replied Mallika frowning. "So, that's how you want to play it?" asked Prachi icily, the anger within her slowly unfurling. Ayesha was right, she needed this confrontation. "Prachi, what are you going on about?", asked Mallika irritably. "How about I spell it out for you? What kind of a woman sleeps with a man, half out of his mind over losing his child?" lashed out Prachi,"Have you absolutely no decency?" "How dare you?!" yelled Mallika. "No, how dare you take advantage of my husband like that?" screamed back Prachi. "I didn't sleep with him!" said Mallika outraged.

Prachi stood still for a second. Something told her that Mallika was telling the truth. But nonetheless she said softly, "You're lying". "Didn't Milind tell you what happened?" asked Mallika, narrowing her eyes. Prachi didn't reply. She looked confused. "He didn't did he? And you think we slept together?", asked Mallika astonished. Still Prachi didn't reply, she was becoming more convinced by the second that Mallika was telling the truth. "He was in no fit state to even stand up yet alone get into bed with someone. One minute I was talking to him and the next minute he was passed out cold on my sofa. When you phoned, I got him up. He got up and left and the next thing I know he had moved to Turkey." said Mallika. Prachi felt dizzy. "You were after him, from the first moment you met him, you were after him." said Prachi accusingly, desperately trying to hold onto, what, until that moment, had been her justified anger. "Fine, I was attracted to him, I tried flirting with him. But that's not going to get you anyway, if he is not interested and Milind wasn't. The few times he spoke to me about anything personal, it was about you and your daughter." said Mallika coolly. Prachi stared at the floor, feeling unsteady on her feet. "I'm sorry." said Prachi contritely, finally picking up her head and looking Mallika in the eye. "Well, maybe next time you should try talking to your husband before you go around hurling accusations." said Mallika. Prachi nodded her head, her eyes already full of tears and left.

Prachi sat in the car in a state of shock. Prachi felt horrified with herself. How did she let her marriage and life fall apart over such an innocuous moment? How could she not have trusted him? How could she have repeatedly accuse him of something he was completely innocent of? But why had he never once denied her allegations? She had asked for an explanation and he had willingly lead her to believe that he had been unfaithful. Why would he do that? Why would he walk out on her? Prachi's feelings of self disgust gave way to rage. Both at herself and him. By the time she reached their old home, she was furious. "Prachi, what are you doing here?", asked Milind as he opened the door. He had barely got the words out when Prachi swung her arm and struck him hard across the cheek. "What the hell?!" said Milind shocked. But before he could recover she had already slapped him across his other cheek. As she raised her hand for the third time, Milind grabbed hold of her wrist. "Enough!" he yelled. "Did you sleep with her?" screamed Prachi wrenching her hand away, already crying. "Tell me the truth!" demanded Prachi when he didn't answer. Milind grabbed her by her arms and shook her. "No, I didn't. Do you think I could ever sleep with another woman seeing how I love you?" he yelled before pushing her away. Prachi looked at him helplessly. "Then why did you let me believe you did? Why did you leave?" she asked desperately. "Because I couldn't bear to be around you anymore." replied Milind in tears himself now.

"What do you mean?" stammered Prachi. Milind turned away from her. "Everytime I looked in your eyes I could see it. I could see you blamed me. You were trying not to but it was there, all the time. Everytime I looked at you, I saw her. I saw how I killed her. I killed our baby, Prachi and you hated me." said Milind, his agony clear to see as he faced her. "Milind, no ..." said Prachi in despair as she tried to get grab hold of him but he pushed her away as he continued. "I knew you were struggling not to blame me or hate me but I deserved it, I deserved for you to hate me. At least by thinking I had an affair it would give you a good excuse to leave me. And you wouldn't have to feel bad about hating me." Prachi could finally see how shattered he was. "Oh my god Milind, how could you think that. Milind listen to me ..." cried Prachi as she held his face in her hands, trying to force him to look at her. But Milind blinded by his his tears pushed her away again. "I killed her." he repeated brokenly. "It should have been me.", he said in despair. But suddenly he was overcome with a wave of anger. "It should have been me that died that night!", he screamed as he punched the wall. Prachi was paralysed for a second as he repeatedly punched the wall as he yelled, "It should have been me! It should have been me!" But as soon as she saw the blood spurt from his knuckles, she forcibly dragged him away from the wall. "Milind ! Stop it!" she begged.

He slid down the wall and crumpled on the floor. "I'm so sorry." he said, finally looking her in the eye. Prachi kneeled down beside him. Choking back her tears and holding his face, she said said a low, determined voice, "Listen to me! You did not kill our daughter." Milind tried to turn his face away but Prachi held on tight. "No, I'm the one who should be sorry. I should never have started that fight. We both made mistakes that night but niether of us intended for the accident to happen.", said Prachi. Milind just shook his head. "Milind, I never blamed you. I was just as responsible and it was my own guilt that you were seeing in my eyes. We both have to live with this for the rest of our lives but it's also fate. Nine out of ten time, we probably would still have made it safely but it was just our bad luck.", Prachi said in sorrow as she let go of him and the tears started to fall. Milind looked at her as some of what she was saying finally started to make some sense. "It was just an accident. ", sobbed Prachi as they both accepted that their children's death was a random, cruel hand that fate had dealt them. Milind grabbed hold of her. "I'm so sorry", he said as he cried into her shoulder. "So am I", replied Prachi as she held him tight and they both finally cried in each other's arms.

BC i need next update in a week not in a couple of months.