"A Bitter-Sweet Cup of Chai"
The air in the dark room suddenly seemed to reach for his throat, clogging him. Removing his stiff eyes from the glass, he extended a hand subconsciously towards the satiny tie suffocating him, forcing the knot loose. The lifeless snake responded without a protest, ready to slither away at the slightest pull further. A deep breath of air reached his lungs, and he held it there for a pause… relishing it. After a few seconds, the air escaped his slowly parting lips and he realized an impulse to feel some real air. Without a thought further, he picked up the dark jacket long awaiting his call and walked towards the door. At the base of the building exit, he stopped momentarily watching the nodding head sitting loosely upon a tired owner. For a second he contemplated waking the fellow, but then shrugged off the idea, quickly stepping into the vacant parking area.
A thick flow of cool air felt like life against his numb skin. The rain had stopped a little while ago, leaving its tracks fresh in the streets of the crowded city. A refreshing smell reached his nostrils with intensity… it was not over, the rain. He moved to start the ignition, keys readying in place… but then removed them. Instead, he found himself indifferently adjusting the rear-view mirror. Sitting still for a long minute, his deceitful eyes travelled towards the glass once more. Reaching underneath him, he pulled out the dark leathered object… his wallet. His stiff fingers opened it, unfolding the layers as though it were a secret diary. An image of sweet innocence smiled deeply back at him… as always, sending a wave of calm over him. Closing it suddenly, he set the thing aside, before roaring the machine to life.
As the Mumbai night unfolded before his eyes, he found his sombre mood dull down to something more intense… if it were possible. Miniscule droplets of moisture began to fall over the front mirror again, indicating the coming of another round. Soon enough, the skies poured down, stirring the earth to life once more. Watching the drops cling desperately to the glass afore, an unmarked craving gnawed at him… Turning the dial of the radio compartment, he allowed the flow of melody ease the unexpected urge.
O…
Woh lamhe… woh baatein…
Koi na jaane…
Thi kaisi raatein…
Woh… barsaatein…
Woh bheegi bheegi yaadien…
Voluntarily, he found his foot force down upon the breaks… It was as though someone had thrown a rock at the gates of his glass house. In front, a long stream of traffic made itself present through a steady beeping of horns and curses… but his mind was detached from all of that right now… Unrolling the tinted window to his side, his eyes scanned the sparkling black bobs of umbrellas… a light of reminiscence tingled at his skin. Looking down, he watched a single drop of rainwater cascade from his hand, upwards the length of his arm… The longing he felt now, had transformed into a humble request… and as he gazed around… it were as though the world lay in front of him… like the empty palm he still extended…
Na main jaanu…
Na tu jaane…
Kaisa hai ye mausam…
Koi na jaane…
Kahin se ye fizaa ayeen…
Ghamon ki dhoop sang layeen….
Khaffa hogaye hum… judaa hogaye hum…
Her suddenly tired feet ceased mid-step, while a ceaseless stream of empty thoughts stopped for a needed rest. In between the exchange of air, a sweet melody began in a rhythmic flow through her…
O…
Sagar ki gehraii se… gehra ha… apna pyaar
Sehrao ki inn hawaon mein… kaisi aayegi bahar…
Kahan se ye hawa ayeen…
Ghatayein khaali kyun chaheen…
Khaffa hogaye hum… judaa hogaye hum…
For pause, she stared blankly into the puddle of water having formed by her feet. A lone leaf had somehow wandered into the liquid, now at the mercy of the undetermined flow… Letting out a breath, she realized a sudden loss of energy. Lifting her gaze, she saw her building… The walk was longer than she had expected, though truly not far. Seven minutes, she contemplated… seven minutes… she would be home. But the seven minutes now seemed aged to seventy, while her head began to feel light.
Woh lamhe… woh baatein…
Koi na jaane…
While the train-like syllables of melody penetrated her nothingness, she began feeling the aches of her tired feet… The feeling of exhaustion slowly ran over her entire body and she wished nothing more than a comforting cup of chai. Lifting the heavy lids of her eyes, it was as though someone had gone and whispered in God's ears and He had acknowledged her humble desire. A gentle, luring aroma ran towards her with the help of a confident breeze. After a few minutes of uncertainty, a faint smile leaped gratefully upon her lips and she momentarily looked to the skies. A thin current of rain streamed down and she held the dark chunri closer to her head while wondering at the energy that allowed her to run towards the loosely busy vendor.
The pungent smells of the spicy liquid filled her nostrils strongly now, like a breath of fresh air… Inhaling fully, she held the mouthful of air in for a few lingering seconds while her eyes cast a relaxed scan over her surroundings. As she noticed the stray shady figures linger underneath the tarp, her fingers unknowingly clung tighter to the base of the warm cup secured between her determined hands… edging close to her nose. An almost childish feeling ran through her at receiving such warmth in the overwhelming weather.
Her gaze had slipped into a sort of video mode, capturing the slightest movements of the tired figures in the shadowy corners of the large tarp hovering above the stand. The shameless observing suddenly found her conscious and she quickly averted her attention towards the humble earth. Holding the darkened cement floor between her eyes, she stood loosely there for a minute… as though the waves of life recently captured in her mind were unfolding in front of her open gaze now… a hundred flashes per minute. It seemed to happen so quickly, she doubted if the ground was still beneath her feet. The looseness she had known seconds before now dissipated… giving way to pulses of rigidity. Slowly lifting the hooded hazel pools of her eyes, she lifted her attention straight ahead… turned slowly to the right… freeze.
The warmth of the liquid in her hands now seemed to take on an icy texture. For a moment, her composure waned… but she quickly turned away… finding refuge in the watery scene afore. It was as though her own mind was playing games with her… but she was neither in any mood nor position for such play. In her hurried decision, she lifted the glass close to her mouth, while the burning liquid gushed through… Fighting the fire, she juggled the liquid in her mouth, squinting her eyes at the unexpected jolt. Clamping her lips tightly together, she held the glass just as firmly… while watching the thin drops of moisture fall lightly upon the earth.
Her mind had again taken her distantly… as she found the image of a young woman meander through the bobbing of umbrellas… Her arms were outstretched, unlike the other around her, which had hidden as tightly possible beneath their covers. It was almost as though they had transformed into a pair of feather-weight wings… allowing her to feel, which none other in her presence could… A smile of internal wealth shimmered on her crimson lips, while her graceful feet danced upon the pools of water. Through some unseen corner, another figure joined her… a young man… His face was dark, but radiant… an element of great happiness evident through the slender curve of his lips… They suddenly seemed to fall into their own world as the man lead the woman through lacy steps… jiving rhythmically to an unheard melody… It seemed highly clichd, but somehow dear… near… "Care for a dance…"
The picture immediately blurred… and she felt the colour race furiously in and out of her cheeks, while a silent stream of curses exhaled with her breath. The surreal vision was so stupidly childish she thought, and mentally slapped the back of her head… but somewhere, she realized it was more than a dream… The voice had uttered not another word, but she could hear it echo still in her mind… Care for a dance… It was a familiar voice, deeply familiar. But the tone of it was cold… acidic. Without turning her head to address the presence, whom she knew to be looking where her eyes searched vainly, she whispered into the air, "You've grown bitter…"
The air seemed to carry her words, hanging them before his face. Bitter… she says. The sweet chai also had acquired a bitterness to it… but bitter, he thought with a mixture of emotions, sarcasm at its highest. Suddenly, he felt like laughing… Bitter! He was bitter? Instead, a low, sardonic chuckle gave way through his lips… Interesting, he thought.
Silence hung above them like the clouds above… but they didn't complain, nor care much for it either. It seemed to provide a strange comfort, a sort of shroud from the unknown.
He quietly recalled the lone vehicle he had passed a while back… There was a garland of small white roses hanging from the rear view mirror. The image had immediately brought with it a thought, which he had long intended to discard. White roses… His foot had paused at the brake for a minute, before he quickly pushed hard on the race.
"It's getting late… let me drop you home, (Raat gehri hai… chalo main tumhe ghar chodh aata hoon)" he stated more defiantly than expected. And then paused, "Unless you don't interact with strangers… that too, of course, would take a small amount of risk… Something you never were much interested in (Unless, ajnabeeyon se tum katraati ho toh… waise bhi, aise situation main kuch khatra toh hota hai… Joh baat tumhe kabhi jammi nahin)," he noticed the immediate flinch of her fingers almost losing the glass between them. A flicker of satisfaction grew within him. It was disgusting, but he felt good… as though he had achieved something… out of nothing. Casting a scrutinizing glance at her slowly agitated figures, a sly grin formed on his mouth and he walked silently towards his black machine.
The gentle current of nervousness slid away as his statement broke through her crust. How dare he, she thought with distaste. There was that hard arrogance in his tone again, almost sarcastic… the chai indeed tasted bitter now. Setting the half filled cup on a forgotten corner of the table, she hurried after his tall figure. I am not a wimp, and you're the last person whom I need to prove that to Shiv Kapoor, she thought bitterly.
The drive was wordless… It was strange, there was so much that could and should have been said… but the words were absent, as was often the case when two acquaintances met in strange, unexpected circumstances. But then awkwardness was not exactly new here… It was there because the participants of the silent conversation allowed it.
She had flatly pointed out her destination and clung tightly the edge of her seatbelt, as though preparing for a jump. The road here was strangely empty, and she could feel it with the pace of the vehicle… He was always was always a maniac when driving. But there was control at work… more than just the car. She found a mild surprise tingle her nerves as the machine rolled to a slow and stopped. Getting out immediately, she noticed him do the same, but much more nonchalantly. Muttering a pathetic "thank you," she began towards the entrance when his rough voice stopped her path. "Won't you ask me to come in Mrs. Agarwal? (Mujhe andar aane ko nahin kahoge Mrs. Agarwal)" Pause. She turned slightly, noticing the damn half grin dancing lazily on those lips… her long fingers unknowingly clamping together in a fist. He came walking towards her now, with slow, cool strides… his hands hanging loosely in the pockets of the dark trousers. Her jawbones hurt. He was standing right in front of her now. "In any case, now that I am in town again, we will likely be running into one another anyways… Have a good night. (Khair, ab jab main yahin yoon… milna toh hota rahega… Have a good night)." She watched blankly at his retreating back… dread slowly etching into her tired features…
Sorry guys, last bit was kinda hurried... Erm...
Comments/Criticisms/Suggestions all welcome!
Cheers,
dc
Love Friendship Dating and Relationships
Bindi
