Hey...guys..
after reading so many beautiful ff, os and ss by you all...even i got inspired and wrote something..
this idea was just popping in my mind from past few days...
hope you guys like it...and enjoy reading it...
Comments and criticism will be warmly welcomed by me...
"she was a girl whose faith was broken from that one person she trusted the most in the world.. her hero...her rockstar...her first love...HER DAD...so she became a callous, cold hearted person who lost faith in heroes and love...
and he was a boy who always wanted one thing from her mother- her unconditional love...but in return became a source of trading material for money to her...his belief in one of the purest relation was ripped apart by her...so he became a ruthless, iron hearted person for whom everything comes with a price...and love is for brainless and stupid people..."
SALVATION
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1. Torn Apart
Lonely is just one word chosen to represent so much
To tell of feelings inside that the senses cannot touch
Lonely can be in the teardrops on a bereaved person's cheek
Lonely can be in the silence of sorrows too deep to speak
Lonely can haunt a deserted room that Laughter once made proud
Lonely surrounds you when you're alone or finds you in a crowd
Lonely is heard in echoed footsteps of a departing friend
Lonely penetrates the solitude of nights that will not end
Lonely will not listen to the pleadings of a broken heart
Lonely stays and torments until new Love shatters it apart
I was running so fast that I didn't even realised when I came in the crowd of people until everyone started staring at me; at first I thought maybe because these people somehow knew that my world ended today and were mourning with me, but then I thought the world is too cruel to realise that and bleed with me... So maybe because I was running on the road like a lunatic must be the reason for the stare. "Let them stare", I thought to myself. I will not stop running as I needed to reach home as fast as I could. But suddenly a small girl came in front of me, stopping me in my mid track and raised her hand.
"WHAT"? I asked rankled. She opened her fist in which she was holding a pink coloured handkerchief and raised her hand.
"Your make-up is ruined, Daddy says pretty girls shouldn't cry". She said innocently staring at me.
That got my attention and then I realised why everyone was staring at me, my hand instinctively went to my face and I realised I was still crying...like seriously... why won't these bloody tears stop flowing... I HATE TEARS...they show my weakness, and I was never weak. I looked at my watch and saw it was almost 10 a.m. and my tears are still flowing...why...why...WHY??? Will everything return to the way it was before yesterday...no...absolutely not... Then also why won't these stupid tears stop flowing. I wiped my face harshly.
" Take it, I said na my daddy says princess are not supposed to cry, they look beautiful while smiling". She again ordered me to take her hanky. I laughed at the irony of the situation, hah... It seems she was also getting fooled by her hero, because her dad said the same thing my dad use to say to me and then I realised that every dad must be fooling their daughter like this only. I started pitying the girl and I don't know what happened to me but I knelt down before her, took the hanky from her hand, wiped my tears and said-
" Never believe what your daddy says to you...daddy's na, they always lie as there is no such thing as princess and fairytale. All these things, these words are a big fat lie, a lie which will destroy you and your whole world when you will reach my age, a lie which will snatch everything from you", suddenly it seems my grief was getting replaced by anger...extreme anger and hatred for everything present around me.
" No, but my daddy never lie to me, he says he loves me very much because I am his princess". She said happily.
" But that is not love, it is just a false pretense which dads like to keep with themselves, so that in the society they can be called as a good father, don't you know sweetheart your daddy doesn't love you, infact HE HATES YOU...HATES YOU VERY MUCH...HE ABHORS YOU". I said in a loud voice with venom in my voice and suddenly that little girl started crying very loudly.
" NOoo... you are a liar". I hoped I was. " My daddy loves me very much. DADDY...DADDY...DADDY..." She started shouting and ran from there.
Huh.. good for her I thought, someone, one day was going to break her bubble of belief so why not me, a complete stranger, atleast it will hurt less in future and thinking so I stood up and saw now the people who were just looking at me with sympathy were now looking at me with disgust. That is also good as I was also disgusted by myself. I started walking towards my home and now I knew what I had to do. As I reached my home. I saw many cars lining infront of my house in which there were police cars also. I reached for my phone as it started ringing again.
" OH MY GOD... beta where are you? ...sniff... We were calling you from last night but you didn't received our phone, your car was parked outside the florist's shop empty and you didn't even go to your friends house. Everyone is so worried...sniff...please come home I will explain everything to you". Came the crying voice of my mother . as I entered in the house I saw my whole family members, my friends and DIG uncle with some police officers roaming and talking in a worried tone.
"it's not your dad's fault, please beta come home give us a chance to explain". My mom said in a worried tone and suddenly my mobile slipped from my hand ..thud...everyone turned around to see the source of voice and gasped but for me everything around stopped. My mom rushed to my side to hug me but I stopped her hand.
"WHAT?? You knew" she suddenly realised what she said in a worried tone " you knew yet you were living with him...so happily...pretending everything was okay between you two". I said pointing my fingers towards her and my so called dad, who was atleast not looking at me directly.
" stop it nandini, atleast let her explain her point of view...dont start doing that". Shayna said
" doing WHAT???" . I shouted.
" shutting us down, you always do that when you caught people lying to you",she said.
" Oh... so you also knew.. Wow...simply wow so everyone knew except me. Mimi did you also knew...", I said turning to my grandma and saw her crying silently and looking down. " It seems you also knew."
" So my worry was useless and here I thought what will I tell you guys... I didn't know how to face you guys after that... I was crying the whole night thinking what to do and look what I got here---a very well aware family who didn't for a second thought to tell me the truth...guess I was never your family to begin with".
" NO...don't say that" my mom said crying " we were trying to protect you".
" Till when mom???? Till when??Huh.. tell me... till when can you protect me from the harshness of life...and from him. His lies...his fake love...". I said pointing my finger at him.
" No beta your dad loves you, its just that he was not able to love me".
"NO MOM!!!! He never loved me, if he did he would have been loyal to you" I said angrily.
" THAT'S WHY I already said to you all to not hide his sins...but...no ..you guys were adamant to protect her". My grandma said angrily. " that's why I couldn't live with him, that's why I went to my old mansion" she said turning to me and explaining me the reason for her leaving us 3 yrs back and going to the old mansion. Because I always asked her the reason and she never told me. Now she told me and the reason was my dad's infidelity... I wanted to do something...break something..so I pushed everyone aside and entered in my house. i went straight to my T.V room picked the baseball bat kept at one side of the room and returned in my drawing room. There in the middle of the room was a big family photo frame of us surrounded by other small photo frames. My mom, sister, grandma and my two besties came running behind me and were looking at me in confusion .
I just don't know but something flipped in my mind and i just went forward and started thrashing every photo frame on the wall.
" WHAT THE HELL"!!!!!! my sister shouted.
" NANDINI...!!!! My mom gasped.
" NANDS!!!! Stop this nonsense and at least listen to what aunty is trying to say na." Alya said to me and Mukti just nodded her head and agreed with Alya..
But their voice was like a faint murmuring in the background of my mind and the only voice what I wanted to hear was of breaking of the glass. Here my world is breaking and they wanted me to let these petty things be intact..no..no..no.. How can I let these glasses mock me ...Nooo... I will break everything around me..
" WHAT ARE YOU DOING"? My mom again shouted and started to hold my arm, pulling me backwards. But my anger made me like a volcano and there was this haze of rage surrounding me and I don't think anyone now, could bring me back from that haze, so I just pushed my mother's hand and moved backwards to see that if everything is broken or not...after confirming it, I turned and went into the kitchen and searched for the lighter... I found it in one of the cabinets. I took it and moved upstairs to go to my bedroom.
" What are you trying to do? Maa stop her na... she only listens to you". My mom said to me but after seeing no reaction from my side she turned towards grandma and begged her to stop me.. I wonder why mimi was not saying anything but I didn't ask because my curiosity was suppressed by anger. I entered my bedroom and locked it from inside pushing my sister outside.
" Nandini!!!! Stop this nonsense and don't do anything which you will regret later and please baby open the door". Shayna said trying to make me understand but I just muted everyone's voice and looked around my room.
Suddenly nostalgia overtook me and I started choking from the emotions and memories which were running into my mind. Me and my dad... no...Mr. Arora...he lost the privilege to be called my dad... decorated my room by ourselves...every corner of this villa was designed by a very famous French interior decorator Jean-Louis Deniot, but I said that I will design my room by myself so he said he will help me... my eyes filled with tears again, but I controlled my tears. This is going to be the last time I cried and wiping my face I went to the corner of my room and flared the curtains with the lighter, then next I entered into my closet and saw the racks of designers clothing, shoes, accessories, all got by him from all over the world and so I flared them also. I returned in my room and saw the fire spreading very quickly around the room, I just sat at my bed and looked around it. It was actually kind of soothing to watch thing burning around me same as my heart...the room was filled with smoke but it was not affecting me...as if I was alone in a daze.. I heard, as if from underwater, my mom panicked shouting, my friends knocking at my door and begging me to please open the door, my sister telling me to calm down first and then think but didn't she know that now actually I was getting calm down. The inferno around me was very tranquil, it was numbing my senses. And so I closed my eyes and drifted.
As I drifted, I Dreamed.
I dreamed of our happiest memories, I saw my mother's profound ecstatic face, I heard my sister's blabber, I felt my grandma's cloak of love, my friends delightful attitude and I remembered my dad's extreme protectiveness for me...but guess what...he was able to protect me from the whole world but not from himself...HE DESTROYED ME...and then slowly my dream ended and the darkness surrounded me...
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Chapter 2 - pg 6
Chapter 3 - pg 9
Chapter 4 - pg 12
Chapter 5 - pg 17
Edited by aairahahmad - 10 years ago