Oh Lord..this show is getting more & more undecipherable! 😕
1) MUMBLE MUMBLE: What the HELL does Piano Man drink before court every day that makes him so hyperactive? It's like he has swallowed a bag of marbles & is gargling them like mouthwash as he speaks. Of course the judge is going to find JassiCeha guilty..not because of the evidence, but because he can't understand a WORD of the defense attorney! 🤢 As for the disease of Mumbles, Jerky Jha has caught it too because there is no way in hell that I understood what he said after JassiCeha screamed (or tried to), "YEH JOOT HAI!" He's been taking Reggie lessons & scoring 100 on every exam, it looks like! 😕
2) THE RETURN OF P.C.: Ohhh mannn..tonight's episode found me with an eyeful of Pink Chadds. His walrus teeth have found their way back to my television screen complete with cardboard face. GAHHH..! The only people excited about THESE flashbacks were probably LR & sonia! 😆 🤢 However, if the only way that they will throw Chadds in my face (Hehe..funny mental picture!) is through flashbacks & not a re-entry, I will be SO grateful that I won't even insult Turd & Doodie for ONE WHOLE DAY! That's a gift, dude! 😲
3) THE 3 STOOGES: Oh man, the 3 alcoholic stooges are great. It's like they throw an afterparty for every day in court. Aggravating Aryan, Jerky Jha, & Pesky Perv..match made in..well, hell of course. I have never seen PERVERTlal look as happy as he does when Aryan's around..hmmm..kahaani mein ek AUR twist? PERVMAN likes to play with the boys? 😉 😆 Anyway, these 3 love making up stories so much, maybe THEY should become the new scriptwriters..hell, @ this point, my uncle's monkey's cousin's brother's pig's mom's puppy's masi's nani's dada could be the scriptwriter & it would be better! 😒
4) Nice opening shot of the show..if I ever go to jail, I hope mine is in the middle of a scenic greenland also..might as well get the best of it all. 😳
5) Of course poor Reggie has already scoured Mumbai in less than 24 hours looking for the driver & his car. How convenient that they are both missing & the car was reported stolen. JassiCeha's so used to blaming her kismat that I'm sure it has a rapsheet as long as the Great Wall of China by now. Forget JassiCeha, poor kismat! 😭
6) JassiCeha keeps complaining & wondering why these things always happen to her. WHY is the world against poor JassiCeha? Ummm..it's PROBABLYYY because you're never JASSI long enough to enjoy what you have. If you stayed yourself, then you would never have had to deal with any of these long drawn-out court cases. You'd be married to the love of your life & probably be on the verge of having an Ashish in a few months! But thanks to your tendency to run for your life like an escaped mental patient & change identities, that ain't happening sister. 👎🏼
7) Unfortunately, it seems as if PERVMAN is back to his original self. I'm not saying that I was EVER able to tolerate him, but I was able to put the daily 9:30PM-10:00PM-Shower-When-Perv-Is-On-Screen ritual away for a while. OH MAN DID THAT COME BACK FULL FORCE TODAY! Just seeing him say that one line with regards to JassiCeha as a dulhan, & I was ready with my towel & shampoo! YUCKKK!!! 🤢
8) So Aryan made sure that every answer that Jerky Jha would ask JassiCeha would have an answer of yes. Man, you should let some of us @ a cross-examination. Are you dumb? Yes. Are you a coward? Yes. Are you egoistic? Yes. Are you hurt? Yes. Are you confused? Yes. Are you deluded? Yes. Are you a retard for not defending yourself? YES! YES! YES! 😵
9) As for the questioning of JassiCeha by Jerky Jha, why the hell was Piano Man so in shock by her answer of YES, AUGUST 5TH WAS TO BE HER WEDDING NIGHT? He knew this. She told him this yesterday. More than Reggie, looked like Karan was in shock. Don't worry homie, it ain't real life..you still got your girl. 😉
10) Jerky Jha is getting even more annoying now than "by hook or by crook" Thakral. This guy is the ULTIMATE court jester..JESTER Jha should be your new name. One small glitch though..you're not funny & neither is your court-appointed audience. Don't quit your day job..Shekhar Suman or Jay Leno, you're not! 👎🏼
11) And the IOTE award of the night goes to..you guessed it! Our very own JassiCeha for being the most idiotic protagonist on screen right now. OPEN YOUR MOUTH. SPEAK UP IN DEFENSE OF YOURSELF. Ghatiya Katial, if you wanted Jassi to be the "everywoman" & represent middle class women and/or women everywhere, then WOW, have you failed. Not only had you gotten it wrong the first time with the whole wedding disaster, but this time, you've just proved your idiocy. NO WOMAN, MIDDLE CLASS OR OTHERWISE, will stand up in court & listen to herself be basically labeled as a sl*t & have her character be drastically & maliciously slandered without saying a word in anger, hurt, or even in her own defense!!! The whole Pink Chadds scandal is out, just open your mouth now, JASSI! Defend your OWN honor..nobody else is going to do it for you. I was SO pissed that I was ready to hit someone..I hate when people speak to innocent women that way. My mom couldn't even watch that part because she was getting so angry. My cousin closed her ears. Now imagine the rest of the masses. Ghatiya, it's about time you used all the money you've made off of this show & BOUGHT A CLUE! 😡 😡 😡
12) Looks like Jha's only job is to yell and scream @ JassiCeha to answer a question without giving her 0.28372 seconds to open her mouth & answer first. Relaxxx buddy..take a tranquilizer or two. You act like you have any other actual job to do besides say "TALUK HAI!" every time Piano Man raises an objection. Don't worry, you have all the time in the world..it's not like JJKN court cases EVER move along in a timely manner! 😕 Oh, & by the way, your head looks superimposed on your court robes..I think that should be the next thing you concentrate on & get a good plastic surgeon with the money that Aryan bribed you with! 🤔
13) OH. MY. G-D. Ket & JP, I'm going to kill you in advance because the title of today's show should have been "WEDDING SINGER JAISSI KOI NAHIN!!!" 😡 😵 🤢 I was going to go CRAZY with the amount of times she sang today.."Ahhhhhhhahhhhhhh" made me go "AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" 😭
14) Rekkha Modi seems to be getting greater use out of the WORD "Armaan" rather than the CHARACTER! When Jha said, "Unki armaan high class society ka hai", it was a lovely play on words..too bad it was only original the first 29308293 times you did it. 🤢 I'm telling you lady, he BETTER be back from "Singapore" on Monday..I'll give you until Tuesday @ the latest before I get violent! You GIVE ME MY DIMPLES! (& I don't mean tomorrow on I-F!) I want to see VISUAL Dimples & not just in the stupid SLAPPING FLASHBACK! 😡
15) That stupid woman/man/he/she/it behind the burkha is annoying & SCARY! First of all, @ times the burkha is see through & @ times, it is completely solid. I know the majority of people think it's the real Neha Shastri but for the new actor/actress's sake, I sure hope not..because they have a VERY masculine build..in which case, I don't think this should be the field for you..unless you want to be the next Bobby Darling. 😳 😉 And finally, you're SCARY! My 50 year old mommy was scared of the lone burkha-clad figure at the edge of JassiCeha's jail cell..next time, warn us of the random Hitchcock scenes please.
16) The judge's faisla sounds like the freaking voice of G-d. What a voiceover to use..if you see the judge, he looks like a little Oompa Loompa from Charlie & The Chocolate Factory or a Munchkin from The Wizard of Oz! It's a good thing they didn't show his face when they used that voice..there is NO way that anyone would have been able to take that guy seriously! 🤡 😆
17) As a sidenote, Molly's saris are baaaaack...helloooo polka dots (so long as she stops wearing the ones with the whole freaking Bhagavad Gita written on them)! In addition, I'd like to throw a welcome home party as well..for..RAM SINGH! WELCOME BACK BUDDY! WE MISSED EVERYONE YELLING YOUR NAME..in 83927832 different locations while you were doing 920380293892 jobs! My, you're quite the multi-tasker! 😛
18) Maybe JassiCeha's silence is a weird way of saving her Armaan? Otherwise whyyy are they making such a big deal about her not using anyone's names? Actually, scratch that..the no name thing is DEFINITELY the connection between Piano Man & Pink Chadds. P.M. ❤️ P.C. forever..I'm telling you, they even have the jaws to match! 🤔
19) Poor Piano Man looked so defeated @ the end of tonight's court proceedings..he was seriously thinking, "Mother of G-d, how the hell did I rope myself into this!?" 😔
20) I know, I know, you're going to kill me for this (some of you), but I can't help it. The SECOND that JassiCeha starts crying, I feel a pang. I feel so sympathetic towards her & I feel so bad for her that I can't help it. Maybe it's just Mona & her stupid way of acting so well! (Hehe..that's a weirdly formed compliment.) ANYWAY, YES, I feel bad for Jassi..I want her out of jail @ least..& well, I obviously want the currently "not happening" reunion with her & Dimples. C'mon someone..give me ONE of the above! 😭
20) And the nominees for the Indian Telly Award in the Best Horror Television Show category are...
1) Jassi Jaissi Koi Nahin-SONY
2) Raat Hone Ko Hai-Sahara One
3) Achanak-37 Saal Baad-SONY
And the winner isss..you guessed it! JASSI JAISSI KOI NAHIN! We'd like to have Turd & Doodie Sh*ts and Ghatiya Katial accept this award. Congratulations on your excellent butcher job! 👍🏼
And the nominees for the Indian Telly Award for Best Villain in a Television Series are:
1) Jasmeet Walia-JJKN 🤓
2) Kaali-Kohinoor 😡
3) Ashmit Gujral-Ye Meri Life Hai 😈
And the winner issss..OMGGG..we have an upset this year folks! The winner is Jasmeet Walia of JJKN for making the girl everyone loved to love into the girl everyone hates to hate but hates anyway! 👏
Congratulations to you all..we hope you enjoy your wins & celebrate @ this year's afterparty to be held @ the following:
HOSTS: SONY ENTERTAINMENT TELEVISION, TURD & DOODIE SH*TS, & GHATIYA KATIAL
WHAT: JJKN TELLY AWARD VICTORY CELEBRATIONS
WHERE: The Nainital County Jail
WHEN: Now until Jerky Jha falls asleep and/or DIES.
Refreshments to be provided by PERVMAN's Infamous Roadside Chai Dhaba. Bring your own cell key for entry. Raffle prizes to be given out: Jassi's black glasses, pink umbrella, & sterling silver handcuffs!
RSVP by May, 2006. 😉
Good night, loves.🤗
Sid
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