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Finally I Have Spoken Whatever Was In My Heart..
Yes..My Heart Is Still Heavy Yet I Am Feeling Some Content..
But What Is This Content About?
Or Am I Being Selfish ?
First Time I Have Took A Decision Of My Life To Which None Agreed..
I Mean I Have Never Thought About Myself.. I Never Gave Myself Any Priority.. I Have Always Kept Others Happiness Above Mine..
And Today What I Have Done Has Hurted Everyone And No One Is Ready To Accept My Decision..
Why?
Because I Have Hurted Guddi.. I Know I Have.. But I Never Meant To Hurt Her.. I Can Never Think Of Hurting Anyone.. Never.. But I Did.. And I Am Sorry Too..
But Is That The Only Reason For Other's Anger?
I Dont Think So.. Because I Know Better..
I Know The Situation..And I Know Whats Happening..
Today I Did What I Wanted To.. For Once..They Should Understand Me For My Stand.
I Never Asked Anything From Them.. I Never Questioned Other's Decision..Instead I Stood By Vividha & Atharv & Sujata Ji Irrespective Of My Heart Bleeding And Bleeding..
Because I Thought Of Their Happiness..And I Genuinely Wanted Them To Happy.. No Matter What I Go Through.. I Never Wanted To Come In Between Two Lovers.. No Matter How Many Times I Was Married To Vividha..And How Many Times She Trampled My Heart And Left Me..
I Never Grew Any Malice Towards Atharv And Sujata Ji.. Because I Felt They Were Blameless..And Atharv Is My Elder Brother..How Can I Even Think Of Hating Or Hurting Him?
Sujata Ji Is Not My Mother..But I Grew To Respect Her And Treat Her As My Own..Afterall She Was My Brother's Mother And My Father's Love..And I Grew Close To Her.. Even After Knowing She Has Killed My Mother To Save Her Child..Because Of Her I Lost My Mother..Yet I Saved Her..And Accepted Her..
Vividha.. The Girl I Loved Once.. The Girl Who Married Me Twice..And Broke Me Twice..The Girl I Stood By Till Date..The Girl I Always Supported..The Girl For Whom I Left My Everuthing Even My Uniform..The Girl Who Screwed The Life Out Of Me..The Girl Who Has Always Hurted Me..That Girl Is Questioning Me And Hurting Me..Again.
Atharv My Half Brother.. I Could Despise Him Or Hate Him For Many Reasons.. But I Didnt Because He Is My Brother..I Thought Of Him Being Blameless In Whatever Situations..I Accepted Him And Loved Him As My Brother.
Like I Said To My Mom Once.. Paraya Kaun Hai? Yaha Toh Sab Mere Apne Hai..
And I Have Amd Will Treat Them As My Own..
Sirf Naam Ka Rishta Nai Hai Unse Mera..
This Is Who Ravish Vashisht Is!
This Is Who I Am !
I Love Everyone..I Support Everyone..Yet When Its Others Turn To Support Me..They Turn Away From Me Because I Went Against Their Wishes.
This Is How My Family Is.
Ironic!
And Today..Even After Doing Soo Much For Them..Giving Soo Many Sacrifices To Keep Others Happy..In This 5-6 Years Of My Journey..I Kept On Losing On Every Path..I Lost My Father..My First Love..My Mother..My Grandfather..Literally Everyone..Yet I Stood Strong..For Others.. Yet I Kept Other's Smile Above Mine..
And This Is What I Deserve In Return?
Blames? Accusations? Pain?
I Never Expected Anything From Anyone For Myself.. I Never Did.. Maybe Because I Knew I Will Never Get That Importance..
And After Whatever Happened Today I Knew I Was Right..
It Was Right On My Part That I Didnt Expected Anything From Anyone..
But Not Anymore.
Enough Is Enough. I Am Neither A Toy Nor A God!
I Have A Heart.. And I Will Follow That.
She Comes To My Room And Questions Me.
In Such A Harsh Manner. It Hurts.
But She Kept On Saying. Why Cant She Leave Me Alone? Why Cant She Stop Hurting And Questioning Me?
And I Lost It...
She Deserves To Know My Point Of View. She Has To Know What I Feel
She Needs To Know That I Am A Humannn Goddammmit! She Needs To Know I Have Feelings And I Feel Pain.
She Needs To Know What I Have Done For Her And Others Till Now.
Enough.
And I Told Her.
I Told Her For Her And Madhav I Left And Lost Everything..Even My Uniform.
I Told Her For Her I Went Against My Mom.
I Told Her For Her I Went Against My Heart.
I Told Her I Am Not A Kathputli.
I Told Her That Even After Doing Soo Much For Her And Others Why..For Once They Cant Stand By Me? Why?
I Told Her That How None Bothered To Ask Me What I Feel.. What I Want..
I Told Her That Even I Have Heart..I Am Not Made Up Of Stone..
I Told Her I Told Her That I Cant Dance On Her Or Other's Tunes Anymore.
Tears Starting Welling Up ..I Tried Hard Not To Let Any Tear Fall...Yet I Couldnt Stop..I Just Had To Tell Her Everything !
Tears Started Flowing...My Heart Started Feeling And Burning.. Those Flashbacks Started Returning.. But I Need To Stay Strong Because Nobody Is Going To Support Me Or Stand By Me. I Know That. And I Am Okay With It.
She Stood There..Speechless..Yet Unconvinced..There Was Neither Any Regrets..Nor Any Feelings On Her Face Or Eyes.. I Knew She Is Not Going To Agree With Me..But Thats Nothing New..This Is What She Has Done Till Now.
And Then Came My Brother.. Atharv.. His Eyes Reflecting His Anger..He Took Vividha With Him..Looking Straight Into My Eyes..
Oh Yes.. He Is My Brother.. Anyways..Its Better Not To Expect Or Think About Them..I Have Other Work To Do.
While I Was Going To Get Kangana's Luggage..I Was Passing Through Atharv-Vividha Room ..Which Once Used To Be Mine..Anyways.. I Heard Her Displeasure Regarding My Step..She Was And Still Unconvinced After I Told Her How I Felt..Anyways.. Its Of No Use..Let Them Think..I Know My Decision Better Than Anyone... And I Kept Moving..
Am I Being Selfish? But How?
Do People Think That I Should Be Selfless..Always.. Do they Think I Am A Stone.. Or Some God..
Yes I Was Selfless..And Still I Will Not Hesitate To Be Selfless..
But For Once I Wanted To Know How It Feels When You Do What Only You Want To...Everyone Has Done That.. Why Cant I ? Is Thinking About Yourself For The First Time Is Being Selfish? Is It? But I Mean Why? Why Others Have So Issues With My Happiness ?
I Never Had..But Why Others Have?
But They Dont Even Know Why I Married Kangana.. Yet They Accussed Me Of Cheating Them And What Not.. They Dont Trust Me Enough? Well It Seems Like That.
I Did Something Against Their Wishes For The First Time. And I Dont Regret It. I Know My Reasons Better.
And I Think Now After Explanation I Dont Owe Them Anymore Explanations.
I Feel Sorry For Guddi.. Whatever Happened With Her Was Wrong.. I Know How It Feels. But I Had To Take This Step Guddi..I Am Sorry Guddi..
Others Need To Get The Facts Clear.
I Am Just Being Human. And If That Makes You Call Me Selfish. Then Call Whatever You Want To. As If I Care. When You Think About Yourself. And Says Its Just A Concept of Being Human And Real And Justifies It..Then Why Not In My Case? Hypocrite Much?! Huh!
You Dont Even Know The Whole Story Yet..So Better Be S.H.U.T . !
And Today I Have Learned. No Matter What You Do..No Matter How Much Good You Do To Others None Will Pay A Heed To It..But Once If You Go Agaisnt Them They Will Go Against You..Blame And Accuse You Like You Have Never Did Any Good To Them.
This Is The Reality Of My Family. This Is How They Are!
Anyways. Now I Am Feeling Little Lighter..Still My Heart Is Heavy..But I Know Time Will Heal Every Scars..Every Wounds..And I Know My Wounds And Pain Will Be Healed Too. I Know..😊
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
