He dashed up the stairs to their apartment, in his heart of hearts, he knew that this was the perfect time for them to talk. And he so wanted it. He wanted this nightmare to end, and he well knew that he was as responsible as Ragini.
She was already getting ready for the Puja, Nachiket noticed, once he entered the bedroom. She was obviously upset, she had not laid out his set of clothes - these were small indications that Nachiket had become aware of.
He stared at her for a while, and then started walking towards her.
She looked up at him once and turned around, the hurt and anger in her face stopping him on track.
And then there was something else - an inherent sadness in her eyes, which he had not bargained for.
He knew that this could not wait anymore.
'Ragini ...' he called softly as he went and stood in front of her.
She sighed
'Now what Nachiket? What more do you want from me?'
She turned away in a huff but he was quick to grab her wrist, albeit lightly.
'Nachiket ...' her voice had a warning edge to it and he flinched.
'Please Ragini' he pleaded halfheartedly 'We need need to talk'
She threw her towel away on the bed and glared at him
'So now YOU want to talk Nachiket?'
He stepped in closer, letting go off her hand
'Yes Ragini, I need to apologise, and WE need to talk. Please ...'
She was a bit unsure now, and was trying hard to tamp down her anger. It was not as if she wasn't aware of how difficult it has been for Nachiket as well, but she was hurt beyond belief. She so wanted him to trust her, like she did.
'Don't you have a flight to catch?' her question was tentative.
There was a glint of anger in his eyes, which vanished immediately
'I have already made it clear that I am not going Ragini ... not now'
They stood there, looking at each other for a while, each waiting for the other to take the step forward.
Ragini inhaled deeply
'I have to arrange for the Puja, Nachiket. If we have to talk now, we better hurry ... or maybe, we could speak later.'
He picked up her hand again and held it firmly
'No Ragini, I won't let you sit for the Puja with this turmoil in your mind. Our minds.'
'Ok. I am asking you again Nachiket, what do you want from me? And this time your response better not include Dr Aman' she stressed
The mention of Dr Aman's name brought him back to reality. He led her to the couch and they sat down. Neutral territory.
He took her hands in his and looked at her
'Ragini, how do we start? I am so scared right now, I can't even explain it to you.'
'Why?' She asked
'Simply because I don't want to lose you ,,, again' He stopped as he looked down at her hands in his, marveling at the contrast, yet drawing strength from the fact that she was still sitting there in front of him, waiting.
'These years have been hell Ragini ... I don't even know how you survived, I survived ... probably it was because of the children ... I became a completely different person then, I was so bitter and full of hatred for you, because I could never believe then that you would ever leave me.
Yes, we were young, headstrong, partly immature in handling our relationship then ...
... but now? Things are different, they should be different of course. We have found each other back, after a lot of trials and tribulations'
He looked into her eyes, the vortex of emotions over there was definitely calmer. And the best thing was that she was listening to him. Intently.
He continued
'I am sorry Ragini. I over-reacted I agree, I wanted you to myself, forgetting that you are more than a Wife now - you are a Mother, a Daughter, a Friend, a Colleague and so much more. You can say that my insecurities got the better of me.'
'However, I still feel that you overdid a bit when Dr Aman was hospitalised. I do realise the support you received from him during those dark times. I so wish I was there for you all then, but alas! That was not to happen.
I am grateful to him for shoring my family in ... but, I do feel you need to draw a line there. I don't begrudge your friendship with him, but you must realise that it's not so easy for me ... I tried Ragini, honestly, but I failed.'
He sighed.
Ragini looked at him, his head bowed as he studied their fingers, now intertwined. She knew at that moment that she never wanted to see Nachiket like that again.
Devika's words rang true in her ears, though they were in this for 22 years, yet they were a married couple for only 5 years running.
She gently squeezed his fingers to get his attention
'Nachiket'
He looked up as she continued
'Do you know what I want from you?'
He nodded his head, a bit unsure
'I want you to trust me with this please, I know you love me a lot but that has never been the problem'
He was a bit hopeful now
'We are work in progress Nachiket, I do realise that. But without trust, we cannot move ahead ... together'
He looked down at their hands once again. She pulled away from his grasp and he looked at her concerned. She cupped his cheek and he leaned in towards the warmth it generated.
'I love you Nachiket, have always done so. How can I prioritise my love for you Nachiket? Tell me please ... there is no list, no priorities ... don't you understand?'
His hand moved up to cup her hand still resting against his cheek and he kissed her palm, tears blinding his vision.
'I am sorry Ragini'
'Just trust me Nachiket' she said, as she wiped away his tears.
'And please do not doubt my love for you.'
He nodded emphatically
'Never'
Bollywood
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
