shabz50 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#1
Hi i have written this on Tianas prompt hope u like it.

Nachiket and Ragini had been married for 2 years they had a eight month old baby called ranbir. Nachiket had just been promoted to head of cardiology at work.

Evening
Ragini had just fed ranbir and put him to bed dinner was ready she was just waiting for nachiket to come home so they could have dinner together she was in the kitchen just tidying up when she heard the door close.

Kitchen
She turned around and he was standing there with a bunch of flowers in his hand he walked upto her. He gave her a kiss and gave her the flowers. "What are these for nachiket" "no reason i wanted to buy my wife some flowers so i did" "thank you" he went to freshen up.

Late evening
They were both sat talking when ragini said she had a present for him she came back and handed him a box. "I ordered this after your promotion but its only come now" it had been a month since his promotion. "What is it ragini" "open it and see it" he opened it was a nameplate for his desk it said MR NACHIKET KHANNA HEAD OF CARDIOLOGY "its lovely ragini thank u"

Morning 7am
Ragini was asleep with her back to him when she felt his breath on her neck she woke up he had his arm around her waist he kissed her on her cheek "morning jaan" she held his arm "morning" he kissed her again his time on her neck then her ear she turned and was on her back now he was looking at her he kissed her again "nachiket ranbir" "he is asleep and i did not thank you properly last night for my present we will just have to be quiet" he kissed her again she put her arms around his neck and then the phone rang he broke the kiss "ignore it ragini" the phone kept ringing and then ranbir started crying "nachiket" he moved to let her get up she turned and kissed him "sorry" he picked the phone up and she picked ranbir up and took him out of the room.

Kitchen
Ragini had fed ranbir and was just making breakfast nachiket was still in the bedroom he came out he was all ready. "Nachiket have some breakfast" "ragini i have to go there is a big emergency at the hospital" he walked upto and kissed her "i will finish what i have started tonight" ragini just blushed he gave ranbir a kiss and he was gone.

Evening 6pm
Ragini was in the living room playing with ranbir when nachiket came in he looked tired he threw his blazer on the sofa and sat down he looked worried "whats wrong nachiket" he smiled "nothing ragini just work" he picked ranbir up and hugged him and gave him a kiss ragini was looking something was bothering him just then his phone rang again he gave ranbir to ragini and answered it. "Ragini i have to go work" "nachiket u have only come eat something at least" "no time i have to go.

Evening 11pm
Ragini was waiting for him to come home. Nachiket came and saw ragini waiting for him. "Ragini what you still doing up" "i was waiting for you" he sat down and let a big sigh out. "Whats wrong nachiket you looked worried before and now" "its this case ragini i got today a eight month old baby who needs heart surgery" "why you worried for you have done hundreds of surgerys" "not on babies and especially this small and he is not well he has had previous surgery but they botched it up and now thats made it harder to fix the problem i don't think i will be able to do it" "nachiket you are one the best cardio doctor around if not the best" "ragini when i saw him today he is so small and i saw ranbir in him if i get this wrong i take someones son away i can't do this surgery i will get someone else to do it" she moved close and grabbed his hand "nachiket you are the cardio head there is a reason for that you are the best surgeon they have and u always find a solution to any problem you have to trust in your ability and your skills as a surgeon and just take the emotion out of the case don't think of him as someones son just think he is a patient and needs your help thats all" "ragini if i get it wrong" "you will not nachiket i know you and have seen you work there is not a better surgeon then you" he looked at her and smiled "when is the surgery nachiket" "i was hoping tomorrow but he is not stable enough i will have to see in the morning it will probably be day after"

Night 3am
Ragini rolled over and put her arm out he was not beside her she woke up and looked his phone was there she then saw the hallway light on she got up and put her gown on and went to see.

Study 3am
Nachiket was on his laptop looking at the case when ragini walked in "nachiket what you doing" "i could not sleep i am sorry if i woke you up" she moved nearer him "is this the case" "yes i was just going over it looking at the scans and trying to figure out how to fix the problem" "and" "i think i have a solution but its complex and its not been done by other surgeons in india so i will have to do the surgery solo" "i knew you would find a solution" "ragini how come you have so much confidence that this surgery will be successful" "because i know you and i know how good a surgeon you are and if anyone can do this surgery its you".

Morning 7am
Nachiket was up and ready he had not really slept ragini was still asleep. He kissed her goodbye she woke up "nachiket" "ragini i will ring you later i have to go"

Afternoon 2pm
Nachiket rung ragini "hi ragini" "hi nachiket" "ragini i am doing the surgery today" "i thought he was not stable nachiket" "i know but he is getting worse so i have no choice it going to be a long surgery probably 10-12 hours so don't wait up for me" "good luck" "thank you i love you kiss ranbir for me"

Night 3am
Nachiket came in he was shattered the surgery had been really long but thankfully so far successfull he went in the bedroom ragini was fast asleep so was ranbir he got into bed and he was asleep before he knew it.

Morning 7am
Ragini got up and saw nachiket fast asleep and smiled the surgery must have been successfull she was carefully not to wake him up she went to the kitchen to get ranbir his bottle before he woke up and disturbed nachiket. She was on her way back when she heard him cry she came in the room nachiket was a wake and had ranbir in his arms. "I am sorry he woke you up" "its fine ragini" she got ranbir and sat down to feed him and nachiket sat behind her and wrappped his arms around her hugging her and ranbir "thank you ragini for believing in me u gave me the confidence to do the surgery" "nachiket never doubt yourself you are the best surgeon i know".

The End



Edited by shabz50 - 9 years ago

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TianaWrites thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#2
Thanks Shabz for taking up my prompt😊
This is awesome👏

Much better than I imagined when I gave this prompt😳

And you added all the points😳 like Nachiket seeing his son in that boy... It was beautiful😳

And I loved Ragini's confidence...😳

Her confidence made him win😳

Once again thank you so much for writing on this🤗
shabz50 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#3

Originally posted by: ...Tiana...

Thanks Shabz for taking up my prompt😊

This is awesome👏

Much better than I imagined when I gave this prompt😳

And you added all the points😳 like Nachiket seeing his son in that boy... It was beautiful😳

And I loved Ragini's confidence...😳

Her confidence made him win😳

Once again thank you so much for writing on this🤗


Thank you for liking i think this could be better.
-harini- thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#4
Shabz this is lovely !!🤗 very well written :)
The nameplate, so thoughtful .. The way he was having second thoughts and how she asked him to place some trust in himself..Nachiket imagining Ranbir in the child's place and finally finishing the surgery successfully 😊 very sweet one shot Shabz, Thankyou:)

Tiana- Thankyou for the lovely prompt!!
loveleen3 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#5
Lovely, Shabz! <3 Both the prompt and your treatment of it, is great! So glad I read this! :D
poetic thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#6
Shabz, this is so nice. Thanks for taking up on the prompt and this is beautifully written.

Such a real life situation - gives us a peek into the lives of Doctors.

I am going to re-read it again. 🤗
shabz50 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#7

Originally posted by: -harini-

Shabz this is lovely !!🤗 very well written :)
The nameplate, so thoughtful .. The way he was having second thoughts and how she asked him to place some trust in himself..Nachiket imagining Ranbir in the child's place and finally finishing the surgery successfully 😊 very sweet one shot Shabz, Thankyou:)

Tiana- Thankyou for the lovely prompt!!


Thank you for liking
shabz50 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#8

Originally posted by: loveleen3

Lovely, Shabz! <3 Both the prompt and your treatment of it, is great! So glad I read this! :D


Thank you for liking but i am sure this could be better
shabz50 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#9

Originally posted by: poetic

Shabz, this is so nice. Thanks for taking up on the prompt and this is beautifully written.


Such a real life situation - gives us a peek into the lives of Doctors.

I am going to re-read it again. 🤗


Thank you for liking
neiralove thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#10
I really enjoyed this one Shabz! Especially Nachiket seeing Ranbir in the little boy and not wanting to risk taking someone's son away from them; that was very well done. I also really liked the way you captured the little moments between Nachiket, Ragini, and Ranbir; the kisses they shared, how Ranbir wakes Nachiket up...you take care of all the details in your stories, which is really what makes them such a pleasure to read. :)

Thank you!

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