Posted:
Since the makers of the show decide to show us crap, our imagination must do the work!
_____
His life was worse than hell at that moment.. he wanted to just hold Suhani in his arms and thank God for keeping her life and on the other hand, he looked at Ragini almost collapsing on the bed and wanted to take care of her as well.
There was no way he was going to be able to do both. He felt terrible for feeling that Ragini should be separated from Suhani before anything could happen but deep in his heart, he wanted to take this chance to be with Ragini and make sure she was okay. Something told him she was not going to be exactly cordial with him once she came to know that the girl she was fretting over was Suhani instead.
Making a quick decision, he gestured towards Karan to stay and take care of the situation while he told Aman he would drop Ragini home. She did not protest, Nachiket was surprised. Ragini was too weak to protest, and she welcomed this concern from his side. Aman fretting over her always irritated her, but there was something about Nachiket's insistence, his bossing around that felt so intimate and so protective, she could never refuse this man. He had been so gruff with her earlier- "I'm not giving you a choice, Ragini.. come I will drop you home" and still she had not protested. her heart was repeatedly asking her to give up, to give in.. but her ego was stronger. It always had been.
Walking downstairs with him, she focused on his face and the lines forming on his forehead. Something about the girl had worried him so much.. she could feel his body tensing under his suit. Maybe the girl reminded him of Nishi and made him sad, she wondered.. she was feeling a little dizzy all over again and leaned over on the railing to steady herself. She could not handle it and simply sat down on the stairs.. Nachiket responded immediately and turned around.. looking at her clutch her head with her hands, he felt like helping her back to her legs.. but he knew this was pure exhaustion, he needed to take this slow with her.
Looking around, he noticed that there not a lot of people present in the lobby near the stairs and he just slumped on the step besides her. Against his better sense, he fiddled with his fingers and waited for her to regain her composure. She had always been touchy about children and about children being hurt. He had a fair idea of the mental exhaustion she was going through. Aman was wrong, she was not tired because of the running around.. she was tired because her mind was in overdrive, worrying her life over the little girl suffering from a gunshot wound for no fault of her. He felt her breathing get back to normal and he let out a big sigh.
Ragini felt that sigh more than she heard it. That was all she needed at that moment really.. for someone to let her be.. to let her cope with the tremendous moment. For someone to let her catch her breath.. tears threatened to flow down her cheeks but she felt his arm brush against hers and realised Nachiket was the last person she wanted to break down in front of, especially after all his taunts about her being emotional and being in the wrong profession.
She got up abruptly.. heading down the stairs, she refused to let him see her stingy tears. Soon, she realised it was a futile exercise. He had the car keys and he was going to drop her home after all. She felt like such an idiot. She waited near the car, looking down at the handle.. not wanting to make any eye contact with him. He walked to the car slowly and they set off without a spoken word. Nachiket did not try to make eye contact or talk to her..
It was a wordless drive home.. Nachiket knew there was going to be an implosion and he was not sure how he was going to deal with it.. he felt so inadequate at that moment. He got out to open the door for Ragini since she did not respond to his stopping the car when they reached home.. Opening the door now, he looked at her. Her lips quivered as she finally looked at him.. and she just broke down.. tears flowing down her cheeks freely. Nachiket stood there, paralysed by her tears, as always. He was powerless when she did something like that.. there was nothing that could hurt him more. He did the thing he knew worked best and gingerly took her in his arms.. he stood at the door while she was partially on the car seat and partially in his arms.. she clung to his suit and cried her heart out.. she tugged him towards her involuntarily, just like she did in old times.. before he knew it, Nachiket was crying too.
He cried for her, and for his Suhani and for the moments him and Ragini were never going to have because of all this. Though he did not let out a sound, his tears flowed down rapidly... he was threatening to disintegrate.. Ragini felt his tears on her hand and looked up .. he looked away from her, he didn't like to cry in front of her, even when they were together.. he always wanted to be strong for her.. he gasped for air as he looked away, he had been holding too much inside him.. Ragini reluctantly trailed her hands off him and got out of the car..
She made her way upstairs.. unaware that Nachiket was following her.. opening the door to the house, she felt a hand squeeze hers.. she did not bother to look back, she knew it was him. He sniffled and left.. and another tear slid down her face..
Fin.
Anupamaa
