OS: if only you knew. (NeiRa & RaMan)

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exoLarmy

@exoLarmy

Rocker

+ 5

Posted: 10 years ago

#11

Originally posted by: Sammie_Ronit
B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L 👏

Thank you Sammie 😳

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exoLarmy

@exoLarmy

Rocker

+ 5

Posted: 10 years ago

#12

Originally posted by: luvrr
very nicely written...i hope this happens soon in the real show also...

Aww Thanks! & Yeah i hope the RaMan fake marriage track finishes this week.

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exoLarmy

@exoLarmy

Rocker

+ 5

Posted: 10 years ago

#13

Originally posted by: columbia
Ok I am going to be very honest

I LOVE LOVE your writing! especially the style and the flow it is really keeping me hooked! BUT I have a small problem with the characterization, I don't like how you have written them to be having a war with each other, like this is his win and that is her win, that part I thought doesn't fit in the characterization.

But please please continue , I would love to see where you take it

Thank you for being honest. 😳

I honestly didn't think many people would enjoy this piece very much because personally it didn't see this "wow" factor in it. I don't know but this may have been one of my very bad OSs. And, regarding the characterisation, i think i may have gone overboard because i trying hard to portray them as hurt and pissed off at one and another. I wanted to show them as two very egotistical people. But i guess it didn't come across very well and i blame that on my poor writing in this OS. 😆😆

I think i'll continue after the RaMan fake marriage track is finished. 😊

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poetic

@poetic

Stunner

+ 2

Posted: 10 years ago

#14

This is so warmly written.

I am liking the characterisations a lot. Pl do write sooner 👍🏼

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columbia

@columbia

Rocker

+ 6

Posted: 10 years ago

#15

Originally posted by: beautiful1

Thank you for being honest. 😳

I honestly didn't think many people would enjoy this piece very much because personally it didn't see this "wow" factor in it. I don't know but this may have been one of my very bad OSs. And, regarding the characterisation, i think i may have gone overboard because i trying hard to portray them as hurt and pissed off at one and another. I wanted to show them as two very egotistical people. But i guess it didn't come across very well and i blame that on my poor writing in this OS. 😆😆

I think i'll continue after the RaMan fake marriage track is finished. 😊

No please dont wait. You must continue. I dont want to feel like I should not have been honest. I love your writing especially it has a certain gripping quality to it. You are right, when I went back and read it was that they are egostical and you gave a 'war' zone for that ego, which is fab in its own way. Please do continue, in fact, you have thought it through which in itself makes you a better writer than the show's writer 👏