Why Khushi Cannot Reveal About Shyam: Edited - Page 4

Everything you have written is true Rima but this is not true for Khushi. If she is shown to openly tell Shyam I will slap you - then the CVs are not portraying her as a straight out victim. They are showing us that she is trying to fight. If she is trying to fight then she should be shown trying to fix this problem. The more days she is quiet the more dangerous and daring Shyam will become because to him and any aggressor, your silence means getting away with it. And that is why the forum wants her to open her mouth. Silence means acceptance to these creeps. Silence means permission and silence means getting away with it. The shame is theirs, not the victim's.

Originally posted by: rima

Realization is the key here. She has to understand how dangerous he is. But I am not sure if Arnav is the best bet because he hasn't given her any hope that he will believe her

Originally posted by: Punkin22

Very good Rima. I hope women read and learn that confession is not as easy as one would believe. Something else to think about is KKGSR has had each person around her turn their backs on her because of sudden marriage. Perhaps she doesn't fully trust that not to happen again if she disappoints them. Just a thought...

Originally posted by: Horizon

Rima, right now Khushi's problem is two fold 1. protect Anjali 2. newly found fact, protect ""herself".

Arnav is still her best bet because even if he doesn't address the second problem (as she thinks he doesn't care for her), he would definitely act if some one warns some thing as devastating as that is happening to Anjali even if it come from as untrustworthy source (as Khushi thinks) as Khushi. Even if he doesn't believe in her words and doesn't act also she has NOTHING TO LOOSE, anyway their relation is abysmal right now. What more worse can happen?

For a girl who is shown to have completely imbibed the essence of all the sacred texts, she must be well aware of " Karmanye vadhikarasthe.."... right now she just seems to believe that there is no need to act and if ignored the problem will vanish into thin air!!

Originally posted by: momma1128

Everything you have written is true Rima but this is not true for Khushi. If she is shown to openly tell Shyam I will slap you - then the CVs are not portraying her as a straight out victim. They are showing us that she is trying to fight. If she is trying to fight then she should be shown trying to fix this problem. The more days she is quiet the more dangerous and daring Shyam will become because to him and any aggressor, your silence means getting away with it. And that is why the forum wants her to open her mouth. Silence means acceptance to these creeps. Silence means permission and silence means getting away with it. The shame is theirs, not the victim's.

At this point can she tell Arnav? No. She could have but she thought she knew what was best for everyone. She could have told him even the night of the wedding after the terrace, because she did not know what he saw. Again she misjudged Shyam. Now that the road to Arnav is closed and it is painfully obvious that Shyam has not mended his ways, it should strike her since she clearly DOES NOT want to be a victim and does not want to encourage him, to get an ally. Her sister is there, her Bua is there. Again, if she mistakenly thinks that she can handle things on her own (when it has not worked to thwart Shyam's advances), then this is a costly mistake. Again, her silence is emboldening him and the forum wants her to help herself, not sacrifice herself.

Originally posted by: rima

true. but do you see her very nature is against her? she is an optimist and she will take everything on her if she can help it. she will reach a point where she can't and that's when she will tell. till no she hasn't realized the real danger. she is unable to do anything but threaten shyam as she is in a sense afraid

Actually Rima they have not showed anything on what Khushi really feels or thinks.

I agree with most of your post apart from the last part about y she shld not tell her family or Payal...if they have the same problm as her then why not? besides they are her family...they have seen her go through torture over the engagement with d Shyam phase...they know what kind of a person he is...they'll understand...they are definitely concerned about her situation - if u notice their expressions on the Holi day when Shyam is about to put colour on Khushi, you'll see that they were worried! When Arnav stepped in they were relieved...

They might not be able to help the situation but they will definitely support her..not to mention having someone (Payal) in the house know about the issue will help...atleast Payal can watch out for her irrespective of her MIL issues with Mami..

Sometimes in such situations even if no action can be taken, it is very important for the victim to have moral support, someone to talk to & someone who can look out for them...who knows when any of them might be able to help...not to mention Khushi will not be dealing with it alone - having their support gives her the strength to deal with it...we already know Payal feels guilty about hiding Shyam-Khushi engagement from Aakash..who knows if she found out about this harassment she might at some point tell him..

Victims mostly keep quiet about such things either cos of guilt they feel, hope that the person harassing them will change or they fear reaction from their family members...we know Khushi doesn't feel guilty n she knows Shyam isn't changing...if her family knows then the last point is not applicable (for her family atleast)...she knows Shyam is not backing down n is getting bolder by the day...the warning bells shld hv strtd ringing by now...if she doesn't tell someone it's gonna blow up in her face!! n if that happens he will go scot-free...nothing is worth that situation...

Also someone in their post said women r women's worst enemy (I disagree)...n that most comments bout y Khushi isn't talking r by women...well thtz cos this forum has mostly women...trust me my frens n I had a conversation somedays back over the topic of sexual harassment within families n women as well as men were of the opinion that keeping quiet bout it is stupidity...it doesnt help the victic, it is hurting the family in reality even if they are unaware of it & it just encourages the harasser...today its this victim tomm it could be another! I think thinking women r women's worst enemy is a very regressive thot...yes our society is such tht they'll blame the woman first but come on...if educated ppl like us don't change tht thot process who will?? Also when I read the thot of women in this forum bout the harassment, I don't think they're saying it cos they don't understand Khushi's situation...I think we all do n despite that we think she should tell someone...its the only practical thing to do...as we wld advice anyone in real life to do too! I know this is just a drama but please give a lil credit to women kind...we're not all that bad you know...we do support our kind too ;)

This post is not meant ot attack anyone...just stating my opinion after reading the posts on the topic...no offense to anyone!

Originally posted by: momma1128

Rima - it is contradictory to say that she is afraid but she has not realized the danger. Her nature has been to handle it by herself. It is not working. He is grabbing her in public and in front of his wife. If she is afraid - then her instinct is telling her he is dangerous. But as this is SP, they will send the message she how heroine sacrifices herself for family - even though Khushi was supposed to be, and in many ways is, the unSP heroine.

I am sorry but I don't agree with you.

When I was growing up, my mom told me 1 thing: "If you have done something and cannot tell me about it for any reason that thing is wrong. You can always come to me and tell what is happening even if it something bad. Only your parents will be there to help you and no one else."

I still have those things in my mind and promote the same with my kids.

Coming back to reference to Khushi, if she cannot tell her parents and is hiding from them than that means she is wrong and does not trust her parents.
Then the love between the family does not matter.
If she is not confident about the relationships in her life than that is her problem and insecurity.
If she voices these opinions to others maybe they will not believe her but will have a doubt in their minds.
She does not have to say to others that he is molesting or harassing her, but just say that she is uncomfortable in his presence and then people will look out for her.
Giving reasoning as to why she cannot tell this person or that person just highlights the weak relationship between members of the family.
If she cannot trust her family then she is better of without them and should not stay here.
After all the self respect is what makes you and breaks you.