The Oscar Winners and Nominees of the year have been announced and here are the winners/nominees for various categories won by none other than our lovely characters from IPKKND.
Nominated for the Best Action Packed Event of the year – ASR/Khushi Wedding Boxing Match. Seats have been sold. Bets have been placed. Ringside seats sold for over $1mm. Popcorn, corn on the cob and snacks set. Boxers are ready with their gloves. But a Referee is sorely missing. The hungry viewers chant for more blood. Into the ring we now have – Khushi vs. The World.
Winner of the Coward of the Year Award – ASR. Leave the battered woman on the floor to be punched by the other boxers in the ring while you sit on your comfy recliner ruminating over your coup d'etat over Shyam. Nicely done
Winner of the Easiest Punching Bag Award – Khushi. Take turns everyone. Her gut can use one more punch. Any one else wanna take a potshot at this girl? Go ahead, it's a free for all tonite.
Winner of most Level Headedness Award – Mamiji, She hung her gloves in sheer satisfaction because while everyone is busy shedding crocodile tears, this woman says it like it is. Its a Conspiracy people, the Aliens from GuptaLandofCrazyWomen planet are taking over our Earth. Run for cover and take up arms, We must stand united and defeat the aliens!!!
Winner of the "I need to stick something up my …you know what " - Garima. Hallelujah! You finally got a reason to hate this Khushi.
Winner of the Silent Compassion Award With occasional Spasms – Babuji.
Nominated for Most Misplaced Anger of the year Award – Nani. I can't spar with my grandson; let me punch this girl, instead. Speak up you nitwit.
Nominated for Growing a Tailbone at the Worst Moment of the Year Award – Anjali. Let me don my boxing gloves. Do you know what this mangalsutra means, haan? It means you play dumb, like I do, ignore all warning signs of cheating by your husband. You know nothing about this mangalsutra *PUNCH* Speak up!! *PUNCH*. The Referee in me wants to blow the whistle and cry - Morality and Goodness? Poojas and Paaths don't make a person pious. It takes SACRIFICE. Watch Khushi, Do.
Nominated for Rubbing the Salt in Award – Buaji. You had to bring the blood is thicker than water routine. Disappointing.
Nominated for Best Silent Movie Actress – Payal. In her bird brain, there is no room for complex thought analyzing neural processing ability. Mute and Dumb. Me, myself and I, there is nothing beyond that in that blank as a clean slate mind of hers.
Nominated for Twitch School of Acting- Best Actor – Shyam. Twitch, Ticks….you Twit!!
Nominated for Best Musical Score – "Beat it, just beat it". Michael Jackson wrote the song, exclusively keeping Khushi Kumari Raizada in mind in a very literal sense.
Winner of the Most out to lunch director turned Facebook Comments Ignorer – Lalit Mohan.
Nominated for Most Promising Show Turned into Most Jaw-Dropping-Stinking Piece of Shit – IPKKND of course (IM KIDDING!!!! Its still the best in class, bacchas, don't raise a stink (no put) and don't go about making 1000 posts defending the show. It's going through a shit-phase, the most stinking variety no less. Admit it and move on.)
Other categories were won by some unknown and vagues movies such as The Help, Moneyball, actors such as Brad Pitt, George Clooney, Meryl Streep etc. etc.
Hollywood's got nothing on our Tellywood. Drama, Action, Thriller everyone does, but Melodrama, Sadism, Masochism, we do it best!
Mannat Har Khushi Paane Ki
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