How A Husband Should Be
In our heads I think we all have this image of how the perfect life partner should be. For some of us it's blurry, others it's crystal clear... personally it's more of an idealism that has changed over time. There was a time for me when it was a man who would forever save you... now it's the man who would forever trust you. The ideal husband stopped being an unreachable Knight in Shining Armour and instead became a more tangible friend... because that's what we're looking for right? A partner not a saviour... a Saathiya, not a Parmeshwar. The ideal husband need not be a wall erected to keep you from being damaged by a storm, if only he can be the hand that you hold as you weather through it, because surviving through harsh realities is real life it makes you stronger... it keeps you grounded.
Very rarely are we shown my ideal man onscreen he's not the classic hero material. Who would want a hero whose heroine sometimes does the saving? Who doesn't need to actively let her make her own choices? One that recognises that 'let' is a word synonymous to 'allow', and that it in itself sets females back... always back... That would be counter-productive right? Only it wouldn't... it isn't. Support is essential in a relationship, but why is the concept that giving permission is the exact opposite of being supportive impossible to grasp? I've fallen under the spell of many couples in Indian entertainment, but I have found in the past few years myself constantly questioning the depth of their character when they are praised for acts and speeches that have been actively setting the feminism movement back a few decades all in an attempt to forward and highlight it... give it a rest until you actually know what you're doing... Anyway enough of that tirade, that's not the point of this post.
This post is about my appreciation for the kind of husband that Omkara Singh Oberoi is finally showing himself to be... it's a slow development with only glimpses appearing, but it deserves to be noticed and appreciated nonetheless. I think my happiness at his standing in Gauri's defence today stems from a time when Gauri Kumari Sharma did not exist, before the conception of DBO, when Omkara was the rebellious, talented ArtistKara who won over so many of us. This was the guy who was not classic hero material... this was the example of a guy who could have an equal partner a true Saathiya. He shone amidst the dreary... he was fresh, he was rejuvenating... he was original... and for that little while... he was the ideal... my ideal. Unfortunately that did not last. Slowly the monster known as sidelining took hold and this piece of perfection became clouded... became polluted... his actions made little sense, his reactions even less so, and I found myself disappointed. I had wanted better for this character... I had desired more sincerity in the handling of his role... To be honest the whole thing reeked of wasted potential... But yet there was a flicker of hope lying dormant as Omkara underwent numerous changes, as a new development called Dil Bole Oberoi came into play and as a worthy Saathiya entered his life. I will take this moment to say that I have nothing against Ishaana, her character was just not developed enough and I am a Gauri KumarI Sharma fan so I will only talk about her. Regardless, opposite a villain as daunting as Rahul Dev's Kali, the candle of my hope for Omkara's resurgence was still there, faintly, but there. Then came the Svetlana show that did all it could to douse that feeble flame, but I had hope because I could not accept that a character as awesome as GKS would settle for anything less than the Omkara we were originally promised.
Then the merger happened... we lost a lot that day... The screen space we had won back after Svetlana's exit but which was now being shared with a new pairing, suddenly disappeared... the new pairing was jolted but as a RiKarian I felt aghast. We were finally reaching to a high... why were we fading when it was our time to shine? The most important plotline for RiKara the Kali revelation... over in two minutes with no heartfelt conversation... it was the worst feeling for a fan... for someone who had expected more... Yet my hope that Omkara was still there... disguised as a spectator, but still THERE... kept my hope for him alive.
The ups and downs continued with tiny moments of joy but lots of being pushed aside and remaining patient. The Break-up scene where Omkara should have come to the fore, but instead needed to be pushed, what was that about? The fantastic Bareilly track concluding in a sadly lacklustre way. Him defending her to his father... what a relief... Then a vanwaas for RiKara that looks to be ending no time soon...
But today... today there was a spark... today there was a man who resembled my ideal when he defended his wife. Today Omkara rose from the shadows he has been tucked dormant in for so long and with no advice from others he soared like a phoenix and proclaimed that he would not hear a word against his wife. Today I saw what had drawn me to this character. Yes he might have regressed and suddenly found living up to other's dreams is more important than following his own, but I put that down to poor writing beyond anything else. Omkara is still in there... no, he is not the ideal yet he really needs to learn that Gauri's warnings always have reason but he's not gone either. Perhaps he will never reach full potential, perhaps it will not be allowed... But the guy I know is in there is truly amazing. That guy deserves a round of applause. This episode to Omkara still surviving despite being kept under lock and key.
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