Hi all,
This is a three shot aimed at current phase of Rikara's relationship . Setting is that of Shivika's wedding ceremony - the pre phase. This entire TS in from Omkara's POV, his inner monologues, turmoils and undercurrent feelings. I want to attempt on the depth of his thoughts, given a self absorbed self that he is and the layers to his and Gauri's conversations.
Hope you all like it!!
Luv,
Yay
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Index:
Chapter 1: Link
Chapter 2 : Link
Conclusion: Pg 9
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Chapter 1:
House was bustling with activity and festivities on occasion of Mehendi ceremony of Shivaay and Anika. While Rudy and Somu were lost in their fight love camaraderie, with a secret intention of stealing each other's moments more and more, Omkaara was feeling so happy and contended. His little chiraiya, who generally doesn't leave an instance to jump in excitement was a little sober than her normal jumpy usual self. Omkaara had been secretly observing her when she isn't looking around, which has been his usual routine recently. It gave a little pleasure to his secretive heart to watch her eyes widen in excitement, flashes of her very expressive face which changes every single sentence and her straight-from-heart laugh. He was growing increasingly aware of his feelings that were awakening from their latency but chose not to express it much, given his self-absorbed self. They had obtained a genuine comfort level and a lovingly adorable silent understanding between each other, last two weeks they were in each other's company but Gauri seemed to stay a little dull ever since she returned to the mansion. She still laughed with Anika and Sowmya and she maintained her usual self before his mother and daadi that no one could find the difference. But he is not them. He knows her face, her expressions and her heart much better than any of them.
Mehendi ceremony was going on with much fun and ado. Shivaay and Anika's lost-in-each other glances were evident while Rudra was around sowmya every single chance he got, either teasing his way into it or patching up with her in his most quirky way as possible. Gauri sat alongside the sisters, smiling and laughing and giving way when it came to their own moments. While anika had Shivaay's name etched in her hands with all the glorious blush making her feelings evident, sumo was secretive about it having a disguised R which Rudra wouldn't decipher that easily. Gauri wasn't present at that time and joined the party a little later only to be joined by the three brothers. While his brother's had their eyes and ears only for their wives, Omkaara stood silently behind Gauri. She hesitantly looked at him when the designer asked her the name to be etched in her mehendi design. He looked at her still, letting his eyes do all the talking. His eyes encouraged her to go ahead and get his name done but for her this was not enough. Visible streaks of disappointment crossed her face as he remained still to the questions posed by her doe-eyes. She turned with a heavy sigh.
"Mujhe kuch nahi likhna hain"
Omkaara's face fell, while the other two sisters were engaged in their own world to notice this. His face turned serious even in all pretext of keeping cool and the disappointment and agony of his wife's face reflected heavy on him. He moved out not being able to withstand this unpleasant atmosphere feeling her teary glance on him, all the way, with a heavy heart.
Why is he not able to express? What prevents him from giving away these small pieces of happiness to her? He still hasn't given her the stole that he got for her from Germany. Knowing that she breathes the air around him even in the pretext of being just a bahu, knowing she would take a knife for him under extreme circumstances, knowing he is all what mattered to her most in this house, he still hadn't come to terms with respect to expressing his own feelings. But his inner turmoil increased by ten folds, seeing her hurt visibly by his actions, his indifference and him not being able to express. He felt the pain more than her but his inability to decide sternly on the progressive action forward is killing their lovely camaraderie that they build the past two weeks.
His train of thoughts were interrupted by the familiar tinkling of anklets that he could recognize now even in sleep. She had come in search of something and was looking around the dressing table. He knew she is angry at him that she wouldn't even glance at him. Her passiveness about his existence in the room, hurt as he finally opened his mouth.
"Tumhe sirf ek haat pe mehendi lagayi. Doosri mein nahi lagaogi?" He wanted to strike some kind of conversation to pacify her even in the most indirect route.
She still refrained from seeing him through the eyes.
"Wo, main apni phone lene ke liye aayi. Abhi doosri haath mein lagani hain"
"Agar haath pe naam likhna chahthi ho, to likh sakthi ho" he again refrained from saying my name.
She got irked by this indirect subtle conversations, that she has had enough with this
"Main kyun likhoon aur his haq se likhoon. Haath mein pati ya honewali pati ki naam likh ne ki ek matlab hothi hain. Yahan to koi matlab nahi hain" she was waging an equivalent war of words.
"Hain"
"Kya matlab aap hi batayiye?"
"Wo.. wo.."
She was fed up with this hesitated speech.
"Pata hai mujhe. Aap kuch nahi kahenge. Mujhe aapse poochna hi nahi chahiye tha" She turned almost about to leave.
"Jaisa tum kehti ho, tumhaari zindagi meri di hui amanat hain, waise hi mera zindagi bhi tumhaari di hui amanat hain, Is ghar mein mujhe jitna haq hain, utna haq tumhe bhi hain. Tumhe jo bhi pasand lage, sahi lage tum kar sakti ho. us ke liye koi matlab ki zaroorat nahi honi chahiye"
"Mein aapki zindagi, yahan aake aapki ghar mein apni haq jathane ke liye nahi bachayi. Maine issliye bachayi kyunki aap meri pati ho. Aap ke liye wo naatak hi lage, par kam see kam uss natakmein aap mere pati the. Aur jitna maine jaana hain, naatak ki rishta koi haq nahi deta, kisiko"
His heart took a dagger of the words from her, as he struggled to get out of his passiveness to reassure her that he has a different understanding than what she meant just now.
Was it just a mere drama that he staged in a fiercely protective instinct? May be it was, in that moment. But it never seemed to blur out of his mind, ever. He had just stopped from confessing about his strangely real marriage to a women he disregarded, who also seemed to have glued to his senses ever since she ran and fell into his arms with a blood soaked marriage attire, to CB which was the biggest irony of sorts since she was the same woman. Correction He Was.
Her thoughts and effect seemed to have grown on him ever since she was CB even if he knew it later. Their fake drama as pati and patni only gave him a sneak peak into a parallel universe with her being his princess, even when it was supposed to be filled with detest and anger over her characterlessness. He was always waging a losing battle when it came to resisting her or admonishing her, for his mind had grown an alter ego which always kept clashing with his ideologies and judgments, only relying upon the honest glint of her eyes and the innocent & oh-so-sweet caring nature of hers.
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<TBC>
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
Udne Ki Aasha
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