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He forgot.
He remembers half of what happened and the important half is in pieces, here and there.
He remembers undoing her cuffs and eating with her. Laughing and dancing with her. Him asking what the truth was, and her relenting and telling him. That's it.
"She was crying, she said something really important and a big deal. I feel it in my chest, it was a huge deal"
I really enjoyed Shivaay's internal monologue last night. He wasn't angry or blaming or whatever, just single minded determination and impatience for The Truth. That Big Truth that everybody knows around him, and made each other promise not to tell him, truth that left him heartbroken, alone and not knowing Why.
Chantomai Shivaay put on his best neutral face when Annika came to him with coffee. He watched her hesitate and then approach him cautiously. She's afraid he's not dealing with it well, and would create a huge ruckus and cause big problems in the house.
In her mind, the scenario is playing out as it would have if she had just told him the truth instead of leaving. If she hadn't bowed to blackmail and left. Now she must deal with the aftermath .
"I'm sorry... Perhaps I shouldn't have told you all that. You didn't take it well at all, you were so upset and distraught , i cannot imagine how you're going to deal with it all. "
He prevaricates and tries to get the info again from her, but his impatience was showing and he couldn't just patiently let Annika just keep talking until the matter is repeated. She was already trying to make him react to the truth calmly.
"Your family, your identity, the truth.."
"You're the same Shivaay Singh Oberoi to all of us."
"I should have trusted you more, I should have stayed by your side. I left without even fighting. I got scared... I'm sorry.."
Can you imagine the palpitations SSO is having? Goodness. I might have just cuffed to her to the wall again..đ Just tell me damnit !!
"Everyone makes mistakes. Even loved ones hurt you sometimes. But forgiveness is a good thing. You are the pillar of this house, you must stay strong. Don't go confront her please?"
"Who?"
Oh dear, that's when she realized he didn't recall any of it.. Then in her panic she withdrew completely and closed to door in his face. Slam !!
Frustrated and impatient, he tried to force it out of her again. You've already told me once, why not one more time??
It is his right to know. It is very unfair to dangle his "life's truth" in front of his face , and not tell him.
But Annika is back at her original dilemma.
The only reason she was told this secret was to remove her from his life. If not for that, Shivaay would have gone through his whole life NOT knowing ever.
So the burden to tell him is his parents, not hers. I have been very feeling very strong about this from the moment I heard this truth revealed. It's not her secret to tell.
If she tells him, so she can get her husband back, get her love back, wouldn't that be selfish? To hand him his life's biggest shock, ruin his relationship with his parents and his identity, so she can get him back into her life.
"This is such a truth, that changed our lives. We are not Us, because of this."
(But this is Pinky's doing. Their relationship has nothing to do with the truth.. She doesn't want him to be put in a position to have her but lose himself because of her.)
Here's where the dialogues failed her. She could have expressed her burdened state better. Let him see how hard a position she has been put in. But instead she looks stubborn and uncaring. And he conveniently forgot that she was put in a such a tough spot, having to sacrifice for him.
How they ended up fighting over moving on first didn't make much sense.
Yes, he said "My happiness is with you , Annika..." But his entire existence is at stake . What if he takes a drastic step and leaves Oberoi Mansion, estranging himself from his parents and family? What if he loses his strength and tadi and loses himself completely. How will she hurt him like that. Did you not see the way he broke down that night?
I think he will find out, slowly by himself, piece by piece , internally. And he will deal with it alone, not under the microscope of pitying eyes. No, he will not react well to pity, and consoling. Uh no...
But instead of telling him she hasn't moved on, and she just simply cannot tell him the truth, she went and brought up Ragini. And how Aapko koi haq nahin banta, to do all this with me...
Why prod the lion with a stick when he's already hurt? To push him away from her, when he knows instinctively she has done all this for him. She loves me. But she won't admit it.
Now the fight over Haq will begin...
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