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asya34

@asya34

Dazzler

+ 4

Posted: 8 years ago

#21

Originally posted by: maverick04

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EnasZ

@EnasZ

Rocker

Posted: 8 years ago

#22

edited my first reply.

Edited by EnasZ - 8 years ago

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farinaks

@farinaks

Voyager

+ 2

Posted: 8 years ago

#23

What I think in a true relationship one should accept other parter with all their goods nd bads ...with all the flaws nd perfects... Nd if u trying to change them then u r imposing yourself on them not loving them ...u r seeing them as a winning trophy not an equal partner ...true love makes imperfects perfect..it don't change people but revive them like pheonix one dies nd give birth to new one but the identity of the previous does not change it's jzt get transferred
Awesome analysis pearl ⭐️ 👏 😃

Edited by farinaks - 8 years ago

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asya34

@asya34

Dazzler

+ 4

Posted: 8 years ago

#24

and the fact that shivaay didn't give an answer means he too knows that he should have trusted her..and not throw her out ... again ... that is for him to realize but more than that he needs to understand what led to this whole separation in the first place

they both need to admit their mistake TO EACH OTHER...so i didn't like her blaming him for her mistake in this She did not blame him (from her conversation) she just asked him "do you really think I wanted this?" ... again she is trying to make him dig deep within himself to face the truth that he is hiding from. He is not asking her back, as a person normally would, "If you did not want this then why did you behave the way you did?" ... Shivvay needs to start asking the right questions - he is just being Shivvay and choosing to ignore them like he did before.
Who brought NT in? Who let Ranveer in? Who put acid in the Mehendi? etc etc

the part where u say that her NKK still mattered to him and he gave her less importance then people with NKK ...the thing is it was never put to test AFTER HE SAID IT DIDN'T MATTER SO ICAN'T JUDGE
Yes it was ... his whole Family and especially against his mother ... I agree you have to love and respect your mother but not at the cost of your wife's / husband's respect ... that only happens if you consider your Family superior to hers/his. I am sure a lot of married women will vouch for this ...lol

but if u meant that shivaay didn't trust Annika that day because (deep down ) of her NKK then i disagree...not just shivaay...but no man/woman will stand and hear their respective partner hurt their own family and stand siletn Nope - that is not what I meant. That one day (as Annika said) is the culmination or many many days of things left unresolved ... it would have come to head some day ... she just decided that she would take matters in her hands and decide which day 'That Day' was going to be ... do you honestly think this scene would not have happened sooner or later (blackmail or not) with the way Shivvay was handling his mother??
Annika just put them out of their misery and decided for both of them that his mother meant more to him than she did.

even if instead of annika it was anoyone with NKK (say Tia or ragini) then i think we would have gotten the same results but with less cruelty...as (at least for me) his cruelty that day came from the fact that he was hurt)

however,if u meant something else then please explain

p.s: i enjoyed reading ur post and now i c y harneet said that this separation was necessary for them

Annika needs to believe she's an equal...shivaay needs to make her feel that (although he never told her otherwise but he sure felt it many times yet remained quiet)

however,this doesn't change the dumpness of the reason for separation😡😡 I agree ... it was badly handled

pps: i have to repeat this line all the time😆...i am NOT team shivaay vs team annika

i am just not ok with him being blamed and pushed into feeling guilty when he was manipulated into this. the guy didn't throw her out because someone said something...it was because those who mattered the most SAID IT...SHE AND HIS BROTHERS
I agree. She did manipulate the situation so that he reacted that way to it and did what she did to get the results she wanted. She played him but so did his mother. I am not saying that she did the right thing by doing that - I am saying that he did not give her a choice and she had to do that.
All the times she tried to tell him about his mother and the way she treated her what did he do? How would you feel if all your hurt, insults and pain was trivialized with the words "She is my mother and you do not speak to a mother that way' without thinking 'why would my wife who loves and sacrifices for my Family lie to me?'
How about you say instead that "she is my lawfully wedded wife and the older bahu of this house who has sacrificed 'n' number of times for our safety and our happiness and you do not speak to my wife that way'?
He is very quick to praise Gauri and Bhavya but does not afford that respect to his wife??

She did what she did and expected him to respond exactly how she thought he would and yes it was manipulation but think of it on the flip side. He was predicable and he DID do it. He did not surprise her and say anything different even in one of the situations - he behaved just as she expected him to when it came to HER and his Family.
"Haar humesha meri hogi" - she always knew in her heart that she would lose. Between her and his mother he always chose his mother ... time and again... over and over ... so what was she to do but step aside and concede defeat because she knew she would NEVER be chosen over his Family Members who had NKK and she unfortunately did not.

ppps:& yes...he's a dork...he's sitting here being hurt because she has hurt his brothers...he got so blind by his own pain that he can't see that his brothers are actually helping her do whatever she wants to do😡😡...if shivaay really didn't try to look for the truth in these 3 months then he proved annika 100% true (that he only looked at that day) and he proved to be completely dumb (cause even after lapse he can't see that for those whom the relation broke for...they're the same that are taking annika's side) *i am face palming like hell at this point*
The only time Shivvay will look for the truth is the day he accepts from his heart that what Annika did was totally out of character for her. Right now he considers her the guilty one and the wrong because it is convenient for him to do so, so why should he even bother looking for another to blame.
"Salman Khan ki picture flop hui toh Annika ki galti hai" - remember her saying that during the intruder episode?? He does not want to even consider that someone else could be at fault other than her and that has not changed. If she is not at fault for what happened that day and had to do it against her very innate nature, it means Shivvay has to look towards another guilty party and the options before him are not very desirable because it zeros in on just one person - the one he basis HIS whole NKK on. That crumbling is his whole identity crumbling.
As I said - he needs to take his blinder off or this marriage is not going to be salvaged
Annika has taken her time away to search within herself and face the truth that she was wrong on many fronts - Billu on the other hand has spent it wallowing in self pity it seems - unless we see some introspection from his part ..lol

ETA: i know this post is about annika's evolvement and after reading so many comments i think i might have converted the subject...i don't have anything regarding what u said...about her loosing herself or picking up the pieces in those 3 months

strong annika is shivaay's real annika and i am glad she's back...i guess the fact that she's giving it back to shivaay instead of trying to fix the mess is the reason for my ranting
I think in the beginning they did show her as giving it back, as good she got, to Shivvay in a bid to get the Taddibaaz back. I think that is what the writer were aiming to do ... frankly I was as lost as you when they (very clearly) changed the script and direction of the story on us in the matter of 2 episodes ..lol That is Soaps for you
Annika has not evolved as you say ... infact she is an Annika, who you might say, went to a 'meditation camp' deep in the forest away from the worldly ties that held her down and discovered herself again. Nothing about her is new, she is just rediscovered! lol 😆

The Annika I see now is more the confident Annika from the past who never shied from just stating her opinions and her viewpoint whether it matched his or not. His opinion and his viewpoint may be HEARD by her but she sure as hell does not LISTEN to it anymore, kinda like she did in the past. 🤣 🤣
As I said - she is operating on the 'Rogue One' mode😆
This is the single, free, footloose and fancy Annika and Billu is not liking this unchained and 'free to do as she pleases' Old Annika version very much. This is because then she was not married to him but this one has now been married to him.

What is stumping Shivvay is that this is the unmarried version of the Annika he knows while his mind keeps playing and rewinding the 'Wife' version of the Annika he knows. His confusion is genuine ...lol 😕
Kaunsi Annika Meri Hai , ek for sure Farzi Annika hai according to him ..lol 😆

As for fixing it, I get what you are saying. She should admit that she was at fault too and that will happen gradually (I hope) because these are things that one cannot blurt out - they have to happen naturally in the course of conversation between husband and wife.

sorry if the comment was misplaced...i had to vent it out somewhere and ur post was at first about the date😆😆😆 vent all you want dear ... my posts always belong to everyone as long as they are kept civil (I know we all at IB do that - are civil I mean😉)

Edited by asya34 - 8 years ago

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asya34

@asya34

Dazzler

+ 4

Posted: 8 years ago

#25

Awesome analysis pearl...

you know wat...i learnt an important lesson from ishqbaaz is never try to hold on a relationship at the cost of your dignity and self respect... we all loved the charecter of Annika because she was a self made women who never allowed anyone to play with her dignity... she always gives it back at the same moment but after the marriage we saw a drastic change in that

we can't blame Annika completely her here because she never experienced love in her life... the first person who taken care of her was shivaay... she was too emotionally attached to him... he became the light of her life... her strength but after sometime he started to become her weakness... she started to do everything to keep him happy... she knows family is everything to him... so she also started to do everything for the family even though if it causes her insult... most importantly she had given shivaay a view that she will not leave him... she always fears that and shivaay knows it too... she began to become a perfect Bahu... a perfect sister in law... perfect wife... shivaay was used to it... and he thought that that is the real Annika and we all lost the real Annika some where... when Annika decided to leave she thought that a mothers love is above everything... but she forgot that there are certain things only a wife can do for her husband...

she thought that pinky will fill her place in Shivaay's life and Annika had seen the outcome... shivaay always thought that he knows everything about Annika but the seperation track made us realize that he doesn't even know anything about her... so many of us will say that is shivaay an antharyami to know the things that going on Annika's mind... but if omru was able to figure it out then why can't shivaay... wat Annika asked was so True he only thought about the single day before throwing her out... she was insulted so many times in that house but when she insulted them one time he never thought a sec to throw her out... he loved her... there is no doubt in that but he never understood the real Annika... he needs a perfect Bahu...perfect wife...

once she flipped from that all the promises flew away in a minute... he always said that he trusted her but if a situation comes he always forgets to trust her blindly..

he always says he understands her but when she needs him to understand her... he never did... there is so much to explore in their relationship... I seriously believe that this journey will be entirely of Shivaay...

he should first try to understand Annika first and he should found out the truth by himself... otherwise he will not learn the important lessons in his life regarding trusting Annika... and in Annika's case wat she had to learn is never compromise her self respect and try to keep the faith in the relationships and never let it go...

more over never allows some one to enter your relationships...

All the stuff I highlighted was so beautifully put and the whole post was spot on

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asya34

@asya34

Dazzler

+ 4

Posted: 8 years ago

#26

Anika lost her personality...Agreed! Though I blame Anika more than Shivaay for this! You are responsible for your own destiny.. 😊

While Shivaay let his love for Anika transform him into a stronger person.. Anika let his love for him make her weaker.. Similar to how Shivaay's pride/love of his family makes him weak at times..

Also, You are only respected by others if you respect yourself.. Agree
Somewhere(and I still don't know why 😕.. and hence, I'll blame the writing), Anika stopped caring about her self-respect(post the hate wedding) and that is when everything started going downhill.. I always used to say her selfless nature was her big flaw and boy was I right.. I did not want to be...

Shivaay kept her on a pedestal...Agreed! He had unrealistic expectations from Anika.. Same way Anika had/has unrealistic expectations from Shivaay that even after emotional manipulating him, even after her tirade against his family, Shivaay won't lose his head.. Does she even understand this man? Actually she does and hence she could play him soo well!!..😆 lol was about to answer that but then you did that already

...But then why is she showing her grudges again and again now.. instead of answering his questions.. because she has sky-high expectation from him.. And maybe that is love.. 😆

Shivaay is letting this hurt cloud his head and is not trying to figure things out.. Agreed! He is behaving like a kid who just needs ready-made answers for the question.. is not ready to use his analytical brain to calculate 1+1.. Shivaay the answer is 2 not 3.. 😛😆 Shivaay is really confused.. His heart says the Anika he fell in love is the real one.. His head keeps replaying the events of the separation and keeps contradicting his heart.. And this man has always been one for whom facts have greater importance than emotions or hidden facts.. But yet he ignored all the facts she put before him prior to her making this decision to manipulate him out of sheer defeat...
He did not want to consider a single fact when it tied it to his mother - his seat of NKK and his ultimate identity with his NKK. It is not Shakti but Shivvay who shields her even though he sees her wrongdoings and that is not being a honest husband that a wife can trust and feel confident about

When NT was being thrown out we saw that very clearly ... he was very clear that his mothers reputation a.k.a HIS NKK mattered to him and yelled at Annika for even suggesting it
When Om asked him to questin NT's reason for kidnapping Sahil he chose to ignore (again.. why did the man who deals in facts do that? Was he was protecting his NKK - his mother)
Later when Ranveer married Prinku he did not check the facts (or maybe he did but did not want to act on it because it was his mother a.k.a his NKK). He just admitted to Annika that he knew she had not done it - why he thought that and who did it if not her was not delved into ... why?? because it was HIS family

All this leads to why Annika felt the best option was to give in to Pinky. She and his NKK which matters the most to him in life would be safe and this she heaerd from the horses mouth itself over and over again
Just like we do not expect Shivvay to read Annika's mind - we should not expect Annika to read Shivvay's and not take his statements at face value.

yes he has tried to change this but he is wired like that...It is not easy to change yourself...The balance might shift a bit but he might never change...

On top of it, Anika keeps avoiding his questions(sometimes the ones that are explicit.. sometimes the unsaid one) confusing this emotionally stunted man even more.. You want her to give him the answers!!??? When has that ever been accepted by Shivvay in an unbiased way??
This is how it will go -
S: Why did you leave me and hurt me when you did it?
A; It was because you never trusted me, took me for granted and your mother never respected me.
S: You know how mom is. She does not mean what she says.
A: Oh! yes she does at least when we are alone ... she insults me, threatens me...
S; Stop!!! Stop It!!! ... why are you always targeting my mother? You don't have one so you don't know how it feels.
...lol
Shivvay wants answers but not the truth ... I said before and I will say it again ... truth cannot be handed to someone or else prophets and wise men would not go seeking for it
Shivvay has the truth before him already (CCTV footage, clues, facts) - he lacks the courage to look it in the face

He is really being brave when he is trying to put forth his point/hurt... after Anika came back to OM.. 😆

Shivaay never understood Anika's insecurities because she never shared them.. Yeah she ran away when the going got tough but that did not explain how deep-rooted they are.. Should we expect him to understand them?? Maybe we should 😊 Unfortunately, it is not that easy.. Shivaay was never her confidant.. She still controlled her emotions when she was around him.. She leaned on him for support.. She screamed at him when he hurt her.. She cried on his shoulder when she was sad BUT she never shared her personal pain/anguish with him or her past with him... Sahil was her confidant.. not Shivaay..

Anika wasn't Shivaay confidant either.. He never discussed his dysfunctional family with her.. They both lived in the present.. actually in a bubble.. But in a relationship, you should be prepared to talk about your past because the past is what has shaped you..what impacts your present and your future.. and you should share the Family truths with your spouse you say you trust... he hid Om's illegitimacy from her ... why???
Was he worried and ashamed that his wife would find out that his so called NKK perfect Family was as flawed as she was???!!
There are no Family secrets between husband and wife ... that is not how the equation works

I wrote this somewhere a few days back - Until Anika says the truth without any pretense, She will have to keep bringing all these issues in their relationship in the forefront again and again.. Truth has to be said like the truth - plain and simple.. without any deceit.. without any lies surrounding them.. I agree and not just Annika ... Shivvay needs to start facing some truths on his home front as well

I might be in the minority but I feel that Shivaay actually won't have issues accepting an Anika with her quirks..similar to how Anika accepts him with his quirks.. I think he was already doing so..! 😊 He had started loving her quirks.. Enjoying them... participating in them... It is just lately when he has actually started showing his irritation at them but that is his way of talking with her.. Similar to how Anika uses her rants to talk with him..

Whenever Anika had put forth her issues(without lies) in this relationship, this guy had made the effort to change himself.. explain himself.. work on himself.. become a better man.. 😊 Except when the test came where he had to 'walk on fire' ... he keeps ignoring the fact that his mother had a huge hand in what happened in his marriage ... his change was limited to the boundaries of 'as long as this does not work against my Family' ... sorry but that is cheating

I don't think Anika's NKK mattered to Shivaay in the later tracks.. When she was pitted against people with NKK, I don't think Shivaay made the choice based on NKK. His choice was made based on 1) facts at that time - those spy cams which are used at writer's convenience or Anika emotionally manipulating him 2) His unrealistic expectations from Anika that she will compromise.. 3) In some cases, Anika ran away before listening to his answers.. I might be missing something... 4) His need to get more information... Can you give me examples when he did not choose Anika due to lack of her NKK post biwi declaration? lol ... I wrote a whole rant about his mother ... she is the ultimate Goddess of NKK in his eyes

Shivaay's BIG mistakes/flaws were/are not tuning his radar.. not accepting that his family can be at fault.. not giving his 100% in order to figure out what exactly was wrong with Anika and then letting his anger(and now hurt) cloud his judgement AGAIN! *SIGH* AGAIN NKK v/s Annika

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yellomellow

@yellomellow

Voyager

Posted: 8 years ago

#27

First, very interesting post. Both characters are complicated and the inconsistent writing (and convenient flips) don't help lol.

His anger towards her is about more than her being critical of his family. He is hurt because in his mind he let her in and she used that opportunity to hurt the brother he adores. He didn't bat an eye at her rudeness towards Pinky, but Daadi and Omru accepted her wholeheartedly (and never hurt or humiliated her). She was attacking her own people mercilessly without any provocation from them. He was silent in regards to the taunts directed at him and Pinky because it was all true, but Omru were innocent bystanders that had nothing to do with her ill-treatment. Blinded by his hurt he isn't seeing her pain at all or the situation around him. The very people she attacked are the reason for her return, siding with her, and genuinely happier because of her. Not going to give him a pass for what he allowed to happen in his presence post-marriage because it was wrong, period. Instead of being fair and checking the facts then making a decision he shuts down completely when its about his family.

Personally, I don't think his behavior stemmed from her not having NKK anymore. I think we're confusing family with NKK. If it was Anika vs anyone else she would win, but she can't win against his family. From the Mallika track, it was obvious that even Mallika the perfect khandani girlfriend was taunted by Pinky during their relationship. Pinky hated her and she didn't even try to hide it, but Shivaay overlooked it. As for Tia, the fake khandani fiancee other than Pinky and Daadi, who remained neutral no one respected or liked her. He turns a blind eye because it's his family and it wouldn't matter who the person is. That's the issue she isn't treated as an equal nor does she get the same benefit of the doubt, unwavering trust, or protection as his family. He took her for granted,period.

I don't think he wanted to mold her into the perfect bahu or wife either. Her quirks and her language is what attracted him in the first place because she was different from the rest. That's why even when he is supposed to be angry and hate her he still drawn to her. In the past, he needed any excuse to not like her so he made snide comment to keep her away. Now, after the separation he just needs to an excuse to fight with her. He is a like a 5 year old calling her names just to get her attention 😆

As someone who watched the show from the beginning he never tried to change her or force her to be something she is not. He was the one was evolving and adapting for her, not the other way around. Anika's behavior has been erratic, but her character hasn't changed at all. He became less cold, less judgmental, and more expressive because of her. He let his guard down and let his real personality shine through. The problem with him is that he always considered her an extension of himself and she can never be wrong. A deadly combination 😆 He had no issues with putting his family first and he assumed she felt the same because they are a team. He ignores Pinky's taunt so should she. He protects Omru so should she.

Family and pride is what connected them. Anika can't do this... Anika can't do that... after proving him wrong multiple times she landed up on a pedestal 😆 Even after the separation he still thinks highly of her. His reaction to fake fiance was "she could do better" because whether he admits it or not no one is good enough for her. In my opinion, he is the one that needs to see and accept her flaws because she is human too. She has weaknesses, insecurities, and being strong doesn't mean she should be forced to handle everything on her own. She shouldn't have to be the bigger person all the time she should be allowed to petty, angry, and childish too.

I wish the dinner scene was longer lol. These two need to just behave like adults and talk, but the writer with her arcs might make that difficult.

Edited by yellomellow - 8 years ago

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zooni

@zooni.blue

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 8 years ago

#28

Iam loving the shivika flow too..

The episodes this week have been simply fabulous...

I expected more from store room scene but your post explains a lot of this...

I agree about anika not being herself post marriage...

Like you mentioned she never wanted shivay to apologise

After jungle track anika gets hurt in leg n when SSO is inspecting she is like ab kya aap mere pair chuyenge... Which means she feels inferior and can't take him touching legs..

Iam loving this anika who is bold, sarcastic n deals with nagini with tact ...

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Tadibaaaz

@Tadibaaaz

Voyager

Posted: 8 years ago

#29

Amazing post as usual
I hope harneet goes to annikas past and shivay understand annika completely instead of showing tia 2.0
I really want to see how they grow to understand each other with their flaws

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Thwisha617

@Thwisha617

Sparkler

+ 2

Posted: 8 years ago

#30

Dear Pearl.

What a lovely post!gave so much clarity on the characters.i love this forum coz it teaches something new everyday be it new vocabulary,new phrases,loving to see writing styles of many writers.its an intelligent forum with intelligent audience😊.Thus,even though I had read the post at 5 in the morning I took time to assimilate n understand it going through all the pages once again!

I have two things to say. One, there are times in life and in marriage too that we act a bit of character too because it is the need of the hour. A lot of times our nature's rub on our partners and vice versa. Now I m not sure whether that is good or bad😆.

That's how I feel it was justified for Anika to act that way coz had Shivaay known a truth he would have been equally protective of Anika as well the same way as she was.( for me that act was of protection even though I do agree with everybody who have written on the previous pages😊)

Secondly, sometime again in life don't we do stuff that we think we won't do but we are forced to do. And in that case it's sometimes better to go with the flow n see what happens even though the cost are too high! That's exactly what happened here.Anika felt she was right and was forced to do something but it backfired n now she is confident that he will have him back. That fight was necessary for their relationship. Don't they say earlier the fights in marriage better the couple strives together 😉

Just my thoughts.bear with me please.😛

Love

Thwisha

Edited by maan-chahatgeet - 8 years ago

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