'Main hoon na Anika': Shivika - Page 2

Originally posted by: geet.a

Been too long, I hope aaj mujhe jootiyan nahi milengi😆😆😆

Here goes, even with sucky editing in scenes.

It wasn't supposed to go like this. She was just supposed to be his wife for a day, and on dadi's insistence, he had to continue with the post-wedding rituals. He was supposed to be by Tia's side. Then why did he find every opportunity to be with Her? Why did he constantly feel the need to bask in her attention, unable to look away whenever she walked toward or away from him?

Why did her gaze, filled with mild contempt, pain, and betrayal, haunt his nights and days? Why did her words feel like they just knew where to wound him fatally?

And yet, yet, he tried to be strong, a feat that was becoming difficult every day.

Before he could react to what was happening, he found himself walking towards her, allowing himself to feel nothing but care for her as she shivered with fever and nightmares; tenderly carried her to a bedroom they were NOT supposed to share at all according to him. And yet, here he was, making allowances because, because she needed him to be with her, because she was suffering, and in considerable trauma.

As he tried to walk away, she held on tight, uncaring of anything, and he, like the protector he always wanted to be, held on.

This woman, this strong, powerful, amazing woman, who used to respect him, had in a moment of weakness recognized the Shivaay she did not understand any longer; this woman, this woman in a moment of vulnerability reached out to him nonetheless, and held on tight, in the child-like faith she showed in people and the belief she held in second, third, chances.

And he, he became the man she wanted, needed him to be in that moment, a man who would move mountains and oceans to be with her, who would not let her get lost in the darkness that engulfed her life.

He became, in that moment, the Shivaay she could grow to love.

Alas, she did not remember him. How could he have been real?

How could she have someone apart from Sahil who held her tight when she needed them to?

And yet, his story made sense. Of course, the sheer idea that he'd pick her up and console her to sleep was unimaginable, completely ridiculous. Perhaps...perhaps it had been a dream, then.

That Shivaay did not exist.

This was a Shivaay who monopolized her attention despite all her angry words, who had an extremely strange way of showing care (for lack of a better, more hostile, crueller word), who did not want to be with her at all.

And yet, this was also the Shivaay who paused with each sneeze, feeling uncomfortable and angry with himself, and yet too lost in his way of life to accept anything he felt for her. And so, promise-bound, he sought to forget the promises he had made in front of his entire family, his business world, and the holy fire (in that order), while she, she stood there with a little vermillion drop in her hair parting, as they united in a mutual pact of silenced emotions, for as long as both live their pained, unplanned lives alone, lonely even in their togetherness.

Love

Geet

Originally posted by: A.C.

Me first! Me first! Will read and come back!

Res

Unres

Geet, my love, I have missed you and I have a request. Can you please shoot me in the head and put me out of my misery?! God, my heat hurts, my heart hurts, my everything hurts! My beautiful ShivIka Geet! I am so bloody ambivalent about today's episode because it was both a new heart break as well as a soothing balm. A balm because I still love them and a new heart break because it was so bloody clear what we and Shivaay has lost. Her respect.

And then you write this and kill me even more!

Why are his bloody eyes so damn talkative?! I hate his eyes I tell you! They burn my very soul! I am so mad at him, really, I am so bloody angry at Shivaay but oh, the pain on his face today. The worry, the care and yes dammit, the gone-but-not-forgotten affection. They are so lost in this ridiculous myriad of accusations that it seems impossible for them to come out of it.

As for her, she's lost within the storm of his making. Unable to come to terms with the fact that she cares for the one who destroyed her. More than her faith in Shivaay, this marriage and her reaction to it has shaken her faith in herself. Her feelings for him, this sense of betrayal as well as this undying never ending torturous hope that this all a lie, it all goes against every thing that she knows about herself. But she can't seem to help it.

It's so weird really, they were supposed to be each other's shadow. They were meant to protect one another from the harsh glaring sun. But he destroyed his own paradise. He killed his very own promise and a part of him knows it too. But yet again, he does what he does always does when it comes to her. He ignores. He avoids. And he went a step further today and actually lied.

But no matter how angry I may be at him, I can't ignore the fact that even now, when he believes the worst of her, he can't help but be affected. Her pain matters. Because she matters and no matter how hard he tries he cannot run away from this fact.

You know what I remembered today after watching the episode? This poem by Byron:

"She was like me in lineaments-- her eyes

Her hair, her features, all, to the very tone

Even of her voice, they said were like to mine;

But soften'd all, and temper'd into beauty;

She had the same lone thoughts and wanderings,

The quest of hidden knowledge, and a mind

To comprehend the universe: nor these

Alone, but with them gentler powers than mine,

Pity, and smiles, and tears-- which I had not;

And tenderness-- but that I had for her;

Humility-- and that I never had.

Her faults were mine-- her virtues were her own--

I loved her, and destroy'd her!"

Is this love anymore? It doesn't feel like it, honestly. Maybe it is love. But its just not enough. It is so not enough.

Love,

A.C.

Originally posted by: naddiya26

after watching the episode i visited forum to check your post

a worth watching episode

a bang on post

you beautifully describe it

Originally posted by: Roudy1

Amazing post geet. Beautifully written. Missed ur posts a lot.
Shivika once again mesmerized us with their lovely chemistry. These two are definitely meant to be together. 😳

Originally posted by: Olicity2124

Welcome back Geetu 🤗

This is one lucky day, a beautiful episode after a long time and you coming here with beautiful post.

Today shivay was so there and I loved seeing him bck even for just one night. She needed him and he was there as her Knight.

Love you woman ❤️

Originally posted by: AreYaar

Beautifully written as always, Geet👏...especially the bits in red and blue❤️...Aaj toh senti post banta tha😆...if not for the lame editing of the FBs in the scene when he's carrying her back to the room, the whole bit would have been more impactful...nevertheless, still some really nice scenes today.

I liked how you pointed out the effect every sneeze of hers was having on him...the worry was stark in his body language even as he struggled to cover it up with his grumbling and trying to order her to stay in the room😆...I kinda died laughing when he said, "LETO!🤣

The paradoxical and contrary nature of his personality and the current situation he's landed himself in is what makes this interesting right now😆

Originally posted by: PaYa_Rivanya

Beautifully written geet...Amazing as always...👏😊 Missed your analysis.😊

P.S.copy-pasting my analysis from Naks AT.😊

Shivikalycious dreamy episode.Am speechless.Loved it to the core.Shivika/NarBhi are Awesome.❤️

Pool scene was damn hot n sexy...Shivika sizzle and on fire..recreated the 1st pool moment.

Shivaay cares for his lady love Anika a lot.The way he tried to make her to sleep in room,the way he was worried for her,checked her forehead,the way he carried in his arms,lovely flashback moments,make her sleep on his bed,the way she hugged him tightly that was passionate,he said she is safe with him,caressed her n slowly made her sleep,the way she held his hand,his admiration on her vulnerability,tears n her beauty.He came to know on her nightmare on her sis n fear of darkness in one shot.That was great.😳

Shivika's nok-jhoks in wardrobe scene n the way she went out from window...Ani rocked...Shiv shocked..😆🤣

My most fav scene is Sindhoor one...it was very very Beautiful.

Shiv is such a lier...how smartly handled n kept secret on night wala moment from Ani.😆😳

Our sherni Ani is back..pepper spray in cheapde reki's eyes.😆😆

Shivaay's eyes on his Anika not on stupid reki in dat pepper spray.😆😆

Hayee...no words...am dead.NarBhi looked perfect in color coordinated dress.❤️

Precap:I think..he sold her house before giving divorce papers...he doesn't want her to leave .lol...he wants her to stay with him always...so used Sahil again...he knows she is self respected girl...won't agree to take any help from him..let's see the whole epi.😊