ShivIka OS: Ae Dil Hai Mushkil

Hey guys!

It's my first OS on ShivIka, actually I'm quite new to fanfiction writing, but I just caught up on Ishqbaaz and I was feeling quite inspired... also I love this song, it's been haunting me ever since I heard it.

Don't be too harsh, but pleaaase tell me what you thinkk! It's quite angsty. :P

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The arrangements were so impeccable that even Tia wasn't able to find a flaw. Ofcourse they would be, she had painstakingly seen to each and every detail. He smiled as he recalled the aunties and uncles taking her number for their own events and the proud gleam in her eyes as she handed out the business cards he had made for her. He recalled hearing her call Saahil right after and squealing at her success, wishing he could be next to her and celebrate with her and listen to her babble about the middle-class dreams of opening a chotta office that he once held with so much contempt, that now charmed his heart and made him ache for her.

It all just made everything harder for him. There was a piece of her in every corner that he turned, like he couldn't escape. The drapery she had chosen for the stairs in her favourite, loud colours, the marigolds and tulips scattered across the house, her favourite kulfi in the sangeet dinner, the gold of his sherwani that she had chosen and the beat of the dhol that was currently piercing him- all served to torment him, to remind him of those hazel eyes and silky tresses, the firey temper that would flare up at him, to pierce him with knives of regret and longing. His own wedding, was an ode to her and to everything he had been fighting within himself, until it was too late.

He caught her reflection as she walked past his door, yelling through the phone at the caterers, and his breath hitched, a usual occurance now, it was like all her traditional shaadi-wale kapde was designed to add to his anguish. She shone in a pink and gold anarkali, her silky tresses were loose and flowing, adorned with jasmine and hiding the smooth expanse of her back that drove him nuts. She saw him looking at her, and stopped in her tracks, and only he would be able to tell the pain etched into her face, her make up faded by the tears he knew she had shed, the blood-red of her eyes lacking their characteristic kohl, serving as a kick to his gut.

He was overpowered by the need to stop her, to smell the jasmine in her hair mixed with her own musky scent, to look into her hazel eyes, to feel her touch, to speak to her, just one more time. Just one last time.

"Anika"

She turned, her eyes refusing to meet his.

"Yeh pagadi bandhogi?"

She looked up sharply, the red-rims of her eyes pleading, charging him with the torture they were both experiencing. He could see the unspoken accusations, right through the hazel of those eyes, straight from her soul as she slowly made her way over and took his head into her hands, her fingers softly brushing the now unkempt hair off his face, arranging it in his signature Shivaay style, and he leaned into her touch, his light eyes never leaving hers, making their own silent plea. Their proximity was suffocating, she was close enough to set his heart racing, and yet she was still out of his reach, too far for him to feel the soft curves of her figure against him, to feel her racing heart against his, to feel the electrifying touch of her skin that he so craved.

He felt something wet stream down his face, mirroring the tears that were now freely flowing out of her eyes as she intensely focussed on the task ahead of her, refusing to meet his eyes. Each turn of the saffron cloth around his head felt like a thousand bricks, added to the growing wall between the two of them. He wanted to scream, pull it off, break through the wall and just hold her. He wanted her to look at him, to hear her frustratingly mock him, to say something, dammit.

Her hands made their way down his face, gently carresing his stubble and setting his jaw on fire as she finally met his eyes, with the same intensity. He tried to hold her gaze, but he saw the resolve build up in those eyes as she blinked and turned away, dropping her hands, as though if she looked at him a second longer she would break.

She turned away. He felt a ball of panic rise up through his chest as he saw her walk away from him- he could not, he would not. He grabbed her wrist, halting her, willing her to turn and face him.

Mera aasmaan dhoondhe teri zameen

"Anika"

He called out, this time pleading, begging her to say something, anything. To give him a reason to stop the proceedings and just take her away to some world they could be safe in, just the two off them. Her eyes always gave her away, he could see the temptation, her resolve crumbling...but he knew she was too strong for that. She inhaled, deeply and shook her head, looking straight at him, neither of them even trying to hide their pain and tears.

Heaven knew how long they stood like that, gazing at each other, both pleading, both accusing, both in gut wrenching, soul shattering pain, both helpless. A gust of wind broke their trance- she struggled against his grip and he let her go, watching her break into violent sobs as she turned and fled the room, a flurry of pink and gold, just like a dream.

He sank to the floor, gasping for air as pain racked through him. Shivaay Singh Oberoi had been defeated, unable to close the most important deal of his life and he wanted to laugh at the irony of the situation, of his own fate. He stood up and looked long and hard at himself in the mirror, before drying his eyes and straightening the pagadi.

So there it was, I don't know why exactly they're not together, they're just unable to give in and confess their feelings and make any moves, so Shivaay is going ahead with his wedding with lots of dard in his dil, but you can imagine that Anika stops him at the mandaap. 😉😛

I totally want to see such angsty shaadi scenes on the show, with one of them doing something at the last minute, but I don't know if we'll ever get that 😭 or if this Mallika track will ever end.. 🥱... I loved Surbhi as Zoya, but this character is irritating me thoda saa... What about you guys?

PS: There's this scene from YJHD where Ranbir Kapoor wipes away his tears and walks away from the shaadi to catch his plane or whatever in Udaipur, that's what I imagine Shivaay doing while he walks to the mandaap in this case ;)

PPS: Tell me what you think guysss! ⭐️

unres

dat was really painful yt beautiful😭👏👏

do write more on dem😊

the pain tho😕, i can feel it

do write more!

For once I am speechless...

It's just amazing, how you have penned down all their pain and grief😳

Please do write more dear😳