It was done. They had done it. It was all over. Raghava sank onto the couch in His chambers, myriad emotions sweeping through Him. His mind said it was right, His heart protesting.
The calm was eerie. The calm in the palace, the calm in His chambers, and beyond all the calm in His heart. He sat there, thoughts running in His mind. His haphazard memories, snippets, all were flashing in His head. There was nothing to do, but to wait. Wait for Lakshman, for He knew His Lakshman would be able to make Him feel better. Even if things weren't actually better,
Bharat, Shatrughan, Urmi, Mandavi, Kirti, all four had come to see Him, but there was no point. The dwaarpal had been instructed to not let anyone except Lakshman in. While they could have somehow gone in, respecting the Lord's and their Bhaiyya's wishes, they didn't. They understood, they knew.
Raghukula Tilaka, Raghuraai, Siyavar Ramachandra sat there for how long, He didn't know. It was well past daybreak, when He heard the sounds of horses drawing a chariot in. He rose and went in to the balcony of His chambers. It hurt Him to be standing there. There were too many memories. Memories. That was all He was left with now.
"Bhaiyya!" Lakshman was breathless, as He practically ran into his brother's chambers.
"Lakshman!" Ayodhyapati turned and found Lakshman standing about three feet away from Him. Simultaneously they moved forward and hugged.
"Bhaiyya" Lakshman hugged his brother tight, offering the comfort that only he could. While the Lord loved all His brothers, the Narayan in Him always sought His Sesha in tumultuous moments such as these.
He knew that they understood, His entire family understood the decision, and would always be alongside Him, but He needed Lakshman in that moment. Tears feel, He allowed Himself to give way to His emotions at long last.
"Bhaiyya, talk to me," begged Lakshman, seating himself at his brother's feet, his hands on the Lord's knees. "Say something, please, Bhaiyya, anything!"
"As whom?" choked Raghava. "Does Rajkumar Lakshman request Avadhpati Raghukulbhushan Rama's opinion, or does Lakhan want to talk to His Bhaiyya?" The tears wouldn't stop. He rarely lost His composure, except in front of Lakshman, and even that wasn't that often that it happened.
Lakshman laid his head on His Bhaiyya's lap. "Anything, Bhaiyya."
Lord Ram stroked his hair softly. "I don't know what to say, my child."
"Anything will do Bhaiyya."
"I don't know what made me do it."
"Bhaiyya.."
"Lakshman, I literally have no idea. I sent my wife on vanvaas, Lakshman, for life. Your Bhabhi, Ma in fact. Urmi, Mandavi and Kirti understanding makes it worse."
"How would they not Bhaiyya?"
"What do you mean, Lakhan?"
"Bhaiyya, it wasn't you. It wasn't Siyavar Ramachandra who sent her away. It was Avadhpati and Raghukulbhushan who did."
"You know it, how will explain to people?"
"Who do you want to Bhaiyya?" asked Lakshman, looking up at his brother. "To whom do you owe an explanation?"
Lakshman was sitting on the dead branch of the tree, staring at the ground. A stray tear fell down his cheek and onto the ground, onto the dry leaves.
"Lakhan?"
"Bhaiyya!" Lakshman sprang to his feet and looked at his Bhaiyya's feet reverentially.
"Lakhan, what is in your mind?" asked Raghuveera, softly.
"Bhaiyya, I left my wife back in the palace."
"And? She understands it, Lakhan" said the Lord, softly.
"I know, Bhaiyya. But then, people will talk, Bhaiyya. About us."
"And that shouldn't matter, Laal. Only when people point fingers at Urmi should you do anything about it."
"What do you mean, Bhaiyya?" said Lakshman, suddenly staring at his brother's face, his eyes searching for something, a sign of something, some reassurance that it was alright.
"Nothing should allow you to remain silent if anyone insults Urmi. People pointing fingers at you, at me, is okay. No one should point fingers at our wives. We must have implicit faith in our wives, and yet, when society points fingers at their honor, we must step forward and preserve it. That honor, and also the praja's happiness, is above our own. Always."
Lakshman looked worriedly at Ram.
"Bhaiyya, are you alright?" he asked, softly.
"I am, Lakhan. Just thinking."
"Bhaiyya, I remember you telling me in the forest, that no matter what, we have to protect our wives' honor. It comes before our happiness, our well being. You were doing just that."
"What?"
"Bhaiyya, your heart is breaking, what is the point of hiding it from me?"
"There isn't."
"Exactly, Bhaiyya. There isn't." He wrapped his arms around his brother, wrapped his father-like elder brother in a warm, comforting hug. He held his brother through the sobs, the sobs that wracked His body, the emotions pouring out of Him. Lakshman held Him, as He had once held Lakshman.
"I really didn't want to," He said, into Lakshman's shoulder, once His sobs had subsided.
"I know, Bhaiyya, I know. But Bhaiyya, this is the husband in you, and the one who made the decision was the king. Raja Ram. Not Siyavar Ramachandra."
He was rewarded with a nod. Smiling, he hugged his brother tighter.
"Lakhan?"
"Bhaiyya?"
"Let me lie on your lap for a while?"
Lakshman smiled. He sat and took his brother's head in his lap. Stroking his brother's hair, he spoke again.
"Bhaiyya? Will you talk to the others as well? They are all worried, especially Bhabhi, Kirti and Urmila."
"I will, Lakhan, I will. They came, but I couldn't talk to them."
"Why, Bhaiyya?"
"Because I needed you. I love Bharat and Shatrughan and the girls as well, but somehow I seem to need you in these situations. Lakhan, without Lakshman, there is no Ram, just as body and soul. A body is meaningless without a soul. You are my soul."
"As you are mine, Bhaiyya. You are my Everything."
"Lakshman, never leave me?" said the Lord, almost in a child-like manner. His heart wrenched at the thought of existing without His brother, His soul.
"I never will, Bhaiyya," promised Lakshman, smiling at His brother.
Edited by Shrinika13 - 8 years ago
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