What do you call a coughing Quidditch commentator?
<<Weasley (Wheeze-Lee!)>> 😊
What do you call jewelery that many people and I share?
<<Rubeus (Ruby-us!)>>
What do you call a teacher with a bad attitude? Moody Who would you call if you wanted to protect your Valentines?
<<Lockhart (Lock-heart!)>>
How many dragons does it take to light up a wand?
*whoosh of flames*
<<Never mind.>>
How many Animagi does it take to light up a wand?
<<Two dozen, because only one of them is actually registered.>>
How many Weasleys does it take to light up a wand?
<<Who needs a lighted wand, with all that bright red hair?>>
<<Seven: Ginny to look upset and do nothing, Ron to sulk about not getting credit for lighting up the last one, Fred and George to try and blow it up, Percy to yell at Fred and George, Charlie to hold it in front of a cranky dragon, and Bill to roll his eyes at all of them.>>
<<One, but they'll have to search through a pile of the twins' fake ones first.>>
How many Veela does it take to light a wand?
<<Just one, really, but chances are there'll be about a hundred guys begging to do it for her.>>
How many Knight Bus conductors does it take to light a wand?
<<Why do they need a wand? They've got those headlights...>>
How many Dark Lords does it take to light a wand?
<<One, but he prefers it to be a light of the green variety.>>
<<Two: One to light it, one to kill him and take the credit.>>
How many Voldemorts does it take to light up a wand?
<<None. Why do you think he's called the *Dark* Lord?>>
<<I'm a bit afraid to ask him just now. He seems a bit preoccupied in his attempts to kill Harry Potter.>>
How many Transfiguration teachers does it take to light a wand?
<<Two, one to change a pen into a wand and one to light the wand.>>
How many house-elves does it take to light a wand?
<<Just one, but they better hope the Ministry doesn't find out about it.>>