Career or Family - Page 2

Originally posted by: varshitap

Hello Swapna dear!

Hi varshitha very sorry for late reply .

Good morning! Thanks for opening this topic.
U r so welcome dear .
I have many things to say...you know me...😆
yeah just like me 😆

Well , this is a serious topic and we women face this dilemma for sure!! I have faced it, my mom has faced it , so I think I can very well express myself on this.

yes many women face this .

I think in life different phases have different priorities and balancing family and career depends on what is important at that point of time. Agreed that in India family is of prime importance , but education and career cannot become secondary.

Unfortunately varshitha education and career secondary only in India still for 80%
of women .

My mom belonged to a generation when employed and educated women were very few. There were no facilities like baby sitting and creches for young kids. But still my mom braved it with the help of family. We never felt lonely or left out as kids. My mom made sure that she spent maximum time with us as leaving her job was difficult. Till today I can see guilt in her eyes when she says she should have done more for us. To be honest my mom was with us in every step. She knew what lessons we had, our teachers names, ... and even she attended every function in our school.

So Great Its good to hear about women balancing both . Aunty well balanced between
career and family . Varshitha when iam reading all this i was just wondering whether this is
all about my mom . Exactly as ur mom my mom was also working and i too never have any complaints with her . She fulfilled all her resposibilities . Succeeded both in job and family .
But u know very few women will get opportunity to do job . What i mean is marriage , husband
In laws all will effect women's career much .

Some husbands and in laws wont agree for job . Then wife without any arguments
just suppresses all her aspirations and adjusts live as house wife .
If any one argues insists then that leads to collapse of family relationship . I have
seen many cases like this My sister and my sister's friends all like this only .

If husband is understanding its ok women can manage both career and family
very well . But unfortunately for majority women its not like that they have to choose
between career and family after marriage .



So when I see Anjali I feel sad for her that she has missed out on so many things.

Anjali willingly chosen only career she willingly left her children for career . I dont feel
sorry about her . Varshitha in m,y opinion also first importance should be given to children
husband if u marry . Otherwise if she is so passsionate about career she should nt marry
in the first place . Why she married why she given birth to children to leave them just like
that if she is so passionate about her career . Its not right and its not humane also .
I tell you that woman is not worthy of pity .

I also faced this dilemma after having kids, but then I just decided to give career a break! You know we may get a job any time but our kids childhood never waits ... So for me my kids were the first priority so I chose them!! I have never regretted this decision as I feel motherhood is so fulfilling!

Exactly this is what i am saying . Motherhood is so important than job . Love u for this
and ur kids are very lucky for having a mother like u .

Many advised me that I studied so much ...what is the use etc etc.. but I don't think we gain knowledge only to earn a few cents!! Knowledge should be used to achieve fulfillment in whatever we do , this is what my mom says!! So I use my knowledge to bring smiles to my kids faces now. I am working voluntarily to make education child centric, helping my kids school in their programs. However this is way different from my education and career!!😆 But I am happy!!😃

I love ur opinion and i respect it completly and its 100% correct knowledge is not
to earn 👏👏.

So its good to achieve something with your family as your support system, rather than achieve something all alone!!

Wonderful varshitha after acheived so much at the end of the day if u r alone no one is there
to share ur acheivement whats the use it never ever bring happiness to any one.
That is what they are showing through anjali character .

Anjali has lost it , She says that she sacrificed her family to become a passionate dancer...little does she know that this is not sacrifice but mere selfishness and running away from the responsibility of her children.

Exactly she is so selfish and irresponsible .

Her "sacrifice" has cost her children and family more than herself!!

When she said she had no regrets... her eyes showed the pain of a defeated person who still believes she is a victor!!

Exactly she is completly lying when she said she has no regrets thats what i said .

Now-a-days some women ( ultra feminists!!) think that giving up career for family is compromising with their ego!! why cant men do it!!

I beleive both husband and wife should be understanding . They should share
responsiblities . If understanding, supporting is there then no need of sacrificing
for women also .


But this argument fails because only a woman can be a mother!! and not man!! A young child requires maternal care more than anything else . So women need to think rationally and with an open mind when they have to make a decision.

Agree child needs mother more than father . I prefer after giving birth to children quitting
job for some time 3 yrs like that and then if husband support is there then she can
manage both family and career just like our moms .

At the end what matters is your and your family's happiness.

Exactly .

Sorry for this looong comment!!😉 I have debated this issue so often with my friends that I got carried away😆

Sorry for what u have given a wonderful reply varshitha . 👏👏

Thanks for this wonderful post. Hope I have not bored anyone!!😛

Thank you so much for this reply . 🤗

Originally posted by: londonkababu

Hey Guys,

Let me put my 2 pennies worth. My Office is top heavy with men and when girls join us they have to be more competitive, more aggresive and ruthless. A lot give in to the pressure, but let me tell you that the best performing person here is a woman in our trading department. This lady has had to compromise on her family and having children. Recently I learnt that she does have a daughter and guess what? The daughter said to me that her mother, was the best, she never believed that her mother deprived her of love, her precious time infact nothing was missed out. Now that is multi tasking by the lady. Kudos!

Oh yes, the daughter too wants to become a M& A (Mergers And Acquisitions) specialist, just like her mother.

Every thing is possible, people just need a chance. Just like Laajo.

Originally posted by: Carina

Hey Swapna 😊

Hi shania 😊

Beautiful post yaar! Sorry for late reply but my days are never-ending @ this moment 😕

Thank u i can understand .

So... My opinion is that career is as important as family. I think today's women are some kind of super women 😃 They can manage both.

Agree . Both are important what i dont like is for carrer leaving family children completly
thats what i dont like .

Men don't have the same privilege, it is proved that they can do only one thing @ a time 😃

Ok i won't bash! 😆😆

Majority men cant do one thing also properly . 😆

In our modern society, it's a good thing that women get the opportunity to work. Just imagine u asking money from the man of your life to buy bread for dinner huh? Sounds like a horror movie 🤣🤣

Agree yaar but unfortunately this is what happening still in India with 80% women .😕

Our grand mothers used to stay @ home to look after their family, cooking, washing and whatever they did @ that time. They didn't go to beauty parlors, no hair Spa, no shopping.. Nothiiig. They stayed @ home and managed as they could.

I'm not saying that they didn't have any credit, they were wonderful women who adapted their life to their society. They didn't have great demands, in fact they were quite content with their life.

Agreed at that time they did nt know anything they did nt have any aspirations goals
as many were illiterate in the first place and yes they were content with that life .

But the world has moved on and we followed. Today's women want more from life, and our society can provide for it, so why not make the most of it?

Agreed yaar

But not at the expense of family's life as shown in GD.
see this is what i dont like .

Anjali choosed her career over her family, she could have managed both, but it looks like she Is not really interested.

yes

I think there's some women like her in real life, but normally they choose not to have children.

Thats what i was saying they should nt marry in the first place and children big no
for people like anjali .

I also believe that they must regret it when they become old, must be horrible to be all alone.😔

yes

So now u know that i believe in having one's cake and eating it too 😉

I too 😃

Thank u for sharing ur opinion shania . 😊

Originally posted by: Hema48

I think we each have our own perspective on this work-life balance issue! My belief is that it doesn't have to be a choice, we can have both career and family though it is tough! I am a working mum and have studied hard for my professional exams and love my work. I can't imagine myself being at home all the time I need my work not just for economic reasons but because I like to be creative and engaged in some kind of creative activity and actually my daughter always tells me how inspired she is by seeing me working so hard! So it is a question of balance and I do take time off when my kids are on school hols!