Posted:
Alright, so I'm not going to lie when I say that I went into this episode with a very strong feeling of dread.. And maybe that is why the episode didn't seem quite as bad to me.. Or maybe that's just me being weird..? 🤔😆 Either way, here are some of my thought on the episode - again, it may get too long.. So be warned! 😆
- Why do I get the feeling that Kesar's bike is his "punching bag" so to speak..? Jaise har show mein the male lead has a "thing" that he does when he wants to vent his frustration/confusion/anger, it looks like riding his bike as an accelerated pace is his thing.. WHY I noticed this, I know not.. My brain works in weird ways.. 😆
- LOL!! So the "entire" family is waiting for Kesar to come home? EVERYONE except his own parents?! I mean Motaba has been MIA since the day Kesar told everyone that he loved Gulaal (the day Gulaal left the house).. I mean we hear OF him, but he's like a ghost... Dikhaye nahi dete.. And I really miss him because he was such a loveable character! So simple, so real, so paternal.. Seriously! I wish the powers that be bring Motaba BACK!!! And where's Paanba? Gulaal ghar ayi toh mummy jee ney betey sey chutti ley li?! WHERE are these two!! WHY do we get an overdose of screeching Jamunaba, hypocritically annoying Sudha and whinning Taali.. Topped with Ramanba's universal "I'm feeling constipated" expressions.. *blekh* Maybe I've seen too much of these guys because as of now they get on my nerves.. Especially Sudha's random comments beech beech mein - for someone who doesn't care for Kesar, she sure has a lot of suggestions for where he might be and spends way too much time thinking about him..
- Taali knows a place Kesar goes to..? One that even Gulaal doesn't know? And one that WE have never seen Kesar go to through out his entire feelings-for-Gulaal turmoil phase?! And she says he goes there anytime he feels upset/stressed? Ummm.. Okay then.. 😕😆
- I cannot tell you how quickly I was irritated by Taali in the scene where she's searching for Kesar. One minute she's calmly telling everyone k she knows where he might be and the next minute she is hopping out of the car and SCREAMING for Kesar while simultaneously bursting into tears?!! WHY does this girl cry so much!? Aisa KYA dukh hai bhai?! Rooney sey Kesar mil jaye ga? And aren't you a grown-as* woman?! Do you HAVE to cry at everything? Can you please show that you have SOME sense of control and practical thinking.. "KEESAAARRR! KEEESAARRR!! GHAR CHALL!!".. Yes because he can sprint to the car in his feverish state.. *rolls eyes* PLEASE grow a brain man.. Please.. 😕 Pata nahi achanak sey kya ho gaya hai donon maa-beti ko.. They were never like this.. In fact I'll go as far as to say that I even liked them both, spare the one or two scenes of Taali's ignorance to Kesar's clear hints at his lack of feelings for her.. I really did. But ab pata nahi kya hogaya hai.. They get harder to bear with each passing episode.. They really are coming across as immature/tantrum-throwing/baat-baat-pe-roo-dene-wali annoying characters.. 😕
- Erm.. So why exactly was Kesar sitting out in the rain? Because he didn't want to go home? Couldn't he have found a covered spot to exercise is right to stay out of the house in? I mean.. Really.. I found that sort of silly k he was just sitting there while it poured around him.. ALL because he didn't want to go home.. I mean I can still see his logic k he doesn't want to be surrounded by all this blame and be viewed in bad light - especially since Gulaal's viewing him so too and he just cannot bear that.. Toh I get that he'd want to just put his foot down and not want to go home, in a sudden burst of anger/frustration.. really, I do. But YE kya tareeka hai? YE kahan ka logic hai?! HOW is getting drenched in the rain and getting sick going to facilitate his decision at all? 😕
- I still don't get why JAMUNA KAKI gets soo riled up for Kesar?! Seriously.. Gulaal kuch bhi boley, his own mother doesn't get as "offended" by it as she does.. Drama queen! Jaise bahu, waisi saas.. Seriously.. 😆
- So when Raman goes to Kesar's side, did anyone else notice Gulaal get a bit tense..? (Or did I just imagine that..?) Could it be that she's still suspicious of his motives, even after all these years? Because he DID hurl Kesar off the roof.. And I'm not sure Gulaal will be able to forget that..
- As soon as Gulaal's alone with Kesar, the first thought that comes to her mind is very instinctive.. It's her desire to take care of him like he did her when she was sick. It's the most natural thing to her, it seems.. To want to protect him and take care of him.. But then she's reminded of everything else that has happened since.. his confession and then his "forcing" her back into the house.. And that restrains her. She cannot possible enable his feeling anymore by appearing soft and a part of her doesn't want to either! No.. I'm not saying that she doesn't care for Kesar.. But that she's ANGRY at him for putting her in this position and just frustrated in general - so the one way that she can still exercise her freedom is by CHOOSING not to take care of him and not to worry about him (or at least pretend that she doesn't.. because really, how can she possibly NOT care for him..? *sigh*)..
- *throughly annoyed muh* I really do not understand why Taali goes around claiming that she WANTS the permission to love Kesar, that she wants NOTHING in return and that she loves him without malice and then make it sound like she's a VICTIM in doing so..? I mean, if you really love the man and if you really WANT to love him, then WHY do you make it sound like it's some torturous task that you HAVE to do and would rather not.. Roo roo k, anso baha baha k kaun pyaar karta hai? Kesar too loves Gulaal, but he's never played victim for it.. She doesn't love him either but it's not her LACK of love for him that makes him sad but it's rather her decision to dismiss his feelings entirely that are the cause of his restlessness. If Gulaal acknowledge the existence of his love like he has Taali's, I think he'd have been absolutely content just being there in her presence without ANY more expectations from her. But Taali madam ko toh acknowledgement bhi mil gayi, apology bhi mil gayi and the guy talks to her nicely too.. PHIR bhi she keeps crying?! *peetoes sir*
- So, does anyone find it absolutely hilarious that Sudha is telling Taali NOT to love a guy who has treated her like a doormat?! SUDHA?! Seriously?! Had she LOOKED at her and Raman's relationship?! She asks Taali why she still cares for Kesar after all he's done? After all the "dhokey" he's given her? Err.. Does she really not remember Raman's "dhokey"? His affairs.. which in hindsight are WORST than what Kesar's done. Kesar ney toh shadi sey pehley saaf saaf sab bata diya hai aur MAAFI bhi mangi hai.. Raman had done neither - and I am pretty sure he still doesn't feel the least bit remorse for it. Toh HOW Sudha can even begin to lecture Taali on something she herself has been doing since day one of her OWN marriage, I know not.. And the hypocrisy continues.. 😕
- *sigh* Kesar, Kesar, Kesar.. *sigh* As soon as his vision clears and he regains some of his lucidity, the FIRST thing that comes to his mind is the thought that Gulaal might be cold.. He looks at her sleeping there (in a VERY uncomfortable position by the way.. 😕😆) and there are NO too-long-to-stand stares with lame background music or way too much wind to hint at the "raging toofan of lust" in his heart.. Nope.. He sees her sleeping there and then, very naturally and almost like a habit, he walks over to cover her up.. It was like the decision to do so wasn't even a CONSCIOUS one.. He just HAD to do it like he had to breathe or blink.. *sigh* And it's only after he walks closer to her and thus becomes a little bit more aware of herself that I feel he momentarily realizes that she's really there - in his room, sleeping in an awkward position.. ALL so she can be close to him should he need it (because really, she could have easily slept somewhere outside too and then gotten back before anyone else woke up.. It was very much doable.. But she stayed because she wanted to!).. And as soon as her realizes her presence in his room, he also (I feel) notices the uncomfortable way she's sleeping and her stubbornness that just wouldn't allow her to get comfortable or put her guard down around him anymore.. And he closes his eyes and takes a deep breath as though he was just trying to bear this thought and the frustration/pain that it brought along.. And then of course he staggers back and lies down.. Continuing to drink in her (currently RARE) peaceful sight as he dozes off.. *sigh* *sigh* *sigh*
- And Gulaal covered him up with a blanket.. AGAIN! And you say you don't care, eh Gulaal? *smirks some more* 😆
- It may just be me but I really loved that Kesar didn't go in "search for Gulaal" mode as soon as we woke up.. I mean he didn't ask after her or try to find out why she wasn't around.. He woke up, noticed she wasn't there and then went on to take the medicine.. But when she DOES walk through the door, his face LIGHTS up.. With that slight smile and that glint of happiness.. *sigh some more*
- As soon as Gulaal asks Taali do to Kesar's "paati", you can clearly see the disappointment on his face.. She's totally ignored his presence in the room and has refused to even directly address him. But he still goes ahead and tries one more time - "Tu meri paati nahi karey gi?" he asks.. And I really feel that he was hoping against hope that she'd say yes.. Because HE had put her before his ANGER when she was sick.. When it was her health against his turmoil, HER health had won hands down.. So it baffled him a bit to see that the same won't happen in this case.. That she could possibly not care enough for him to want to be there for him.. And really, for some reason he didn't seem "childish" in expecting so - Gulaal has always maintained that she'd loved him (not the romantic kind, but love him she did).. And to now watch her avoid something so intimate (again, not in a romantic sense).. avoid wanting to take care of him, to see if HE is okay.. To show that he mattered.. To see Gulaal try and avoid/hide any concern for him, it really threw him off.. Which is why when she tells him that she's busy - a comment both he and us know to be an overstated fact - he falls back into his very instinctive rage.. Every time Gulaal has suggested (intentionally or otherwise) that he may not be as important to her as he wishes/hopes.. Every time there's been even the SLIGHTEST hint that someone/something else takes preference over her care for him (because he KNOWS she cares), we've always seen Kesar get upset and exercise his RIGHT on her.. Haq sey.. Now I know it may make him seem juvenile and almost immature to expect Gulaal's world to revolve around him - but I don't think Kesar would have mind if Gulaal's world didn't revolve around him.. I think what upsets him is the fact that she tries to pretend that it doesn't! She gives Taali the gift he brings her, just to suggest that his gift isn't important to her (or so he thinks).. She refuses to bring him food (when he asks for it in the kitchen and she sends Taali instead.. even though in an alternate universe, had she not restrained herself so, she'd have been the first person to bring it to him without him even having to ask).. Her constant need to show that she doesn't care and the fact that she expects Kesar to BELIEVE it, is what frustrates him.. Or so I think.. And I may very well be wrong here.. 😳😆 But even with all this frustration and anger clouding his judgement momentarily, ONE word from Gulaal and the fog clears away - she has his undivided attention.. What SHE feels and wants to tell him takes precedence over anything he might be feeling or wanting to say.. And when she accuses him of wanting to make life hell for her in the house - to corner her even more and just marvel at her helplessness.. *sigh* The absolute hurt caused by that statement is so clearly evident on Kesar's face.. That his Gulaal thinks so LITTLE of him and expects him to be so vindictive/petty towards her.. *sigh* It does break his heart and makes him loose all his will to fight or hold any anger (even it is because he cares) towards her.. And so, resigned, he asks Taali to do as Gulaal had instructed.. Because he'd be uncomfortable and put up with any amount of disappointment ANY DAY in a heartbeat than make Gulaal suffer even momentarily because of him.. *sigh* Haye Kesar!
- And how can I not mention Gulaal.. Bechari.. I really felt that her lashing out at Kesar was like the "release" for all the stress that's been building on her over night. Ever since he left, everyone's been taunting her and holding her responsible.. And she's had to bear that ALONG with keeping up a strong front and pretending like she doesn't care.. So when Kesar FINALLY comes to and gives her even a little bit of push, she lashes back like a valve's been opened, allowing her uninhibited emotions to flow through! *sigh* She can hate Kesar all she wants (or pretend to as the case may be..) but there is NO one in that entire house who she feels more at home with than she does with Kesar. Tabhi toh, even in the midst of being upset at him for bringing her back against her will and being confused regarding her feeling for him while vehemently rejecting his.. Even in the midst of all this, when she needs to turn to someone for comfort (even if it is done so in an unconventional manner), that someone is without a doubt her "apna Kesar"..
- So Dushyant jee feels guilty about Gulaal's condition yet again? I mean either way really, he's been quite responsible for her current fate.. In the past, the deeyarvatu had to happen because he had actively been involved in orchestrating the situation that called for it.. And now, he's the one who's had to pass that decision for Gulaal to stay with Kesar.. One he's now beginning to "question" (I feel) simply because he sees Gulaal in pain and his own guilt (for his past crimes) just does not allow him to cause her any more grief or sit by and watch her be hurt either (or humiliated, as the case may be with Raman's rant.. Which was too lame in my opinion.. Bina sir pair ki baat.. Gulaal did not NEED a roof over her head.. She HAD one because she was "married" to Kesar. Moron.).. Oh and Gulaal really isn't going to give anyone the right to discuss her relationship (whatever it may or may not be) with Kesar. She can say what she wants and suggest what she wants about him, but anyone else doing it (be that her own mother, father, Jamuna Kaki or Dushyant) and she does not stand for it.. She's always either asked them to drop the topic or just clearly and curtly avoided the whole discussion. She does NOT feel that anyone has the right (?) to discuss or speculate on Kesar and her equation.. I feel that this shows just how much Kesar means to her and how fierce her need to protect him is.. 🤔
- Umm.. About the precap.. I really really hope that the precap is as EDITED as it looked.. That there are other KEY parts of the conversation/scene which would maybe justify or at least explain Kesar's "Mujhey apney haathon sey khana khilaye gi" comment for Gulaal.. Because if it's JUST Kesar's need to be acknowledged by Gulaal, if it's just his desire to have her attention for a bit that's leading him to spout such 2-year-old's/childish dialogues, then I am not sure just how I'll get through the episode tomorrow. Oh please Kesar.. We know you're having your moments today (clearly with your adamant decision to sleep in the pouring rain because "ghar nahi jana".. ) but PLEASE do not throw a hissy fit just because Gulaal won't bring you food. Woh bhi in front of Jamuna Kaki and Sudha jee, ESPECIALLY when you know just how hard they've made life for Gulaal.. If for no other reason, don't do it because it's NOT appealing to watch and will make you look like a tantrum-throwing idiot. PLEASE. *prays fervently for there to be a REASON (and a good one) for why Kesar demands to be HAND-FED by Gulaal* 😳
And I believe that's it for today.. Again, apologize for the length and randomness of the post.. Too sleep deprived to perform spell check.. 😆 I just hope it doesn't sound like the flaming pile of gibberish that I felt it was when it was all just floating around in my head.. 😳
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
