Arranged Marriage

This is a forum so I'm going to express my feelings. I think: arranged marriages suck. You marry somebody you hardly know! For example: Saraswati's marriage. I read that she got married to that creep B, and she hardly knows him. She doesn't know his past or anything. Next contention: Living with your in-laws sucks (Depends, but a lot of times yes) I heard from some people the people in the household will give her a hard time except Satya & the girl in the wheelchair.All the in-laws can do in serials & all is nag nag nag, they can't do anything themselves & they just have to give their daughter-in-laws/sister-in-laws a really hard time. I think the only reason in the past or whatever that they want daughter-in-laws or wives is to do their dirty work, because they (in-laws, husband,etc.) can't do anything themselves! Which comes to my conclusion, I don't want to get married(This can change though) I don't want to sacrifice everything to people who can't help themselves. Luckily, I don't have 2 move in a "husband's house" or anything if I ever get married because I live in America, not India.

Hello anjali,
Listen dont get sucked into what the media shows you. they show a lot of stuff that are half truth which are worse than lies.they are making a mockery of indian values😡. India is fast changing. even though arranged marraiges do occur they let you date the guy and also get to know their family. I guess as a educated girl I would expect this. Well in america or Newzealand(where I have been living for 7 years) everything is about the word "I" that is why people dont have successful relationships. They are miserable more prone to depression and god knows what else. I know alll this coz I have a lot of friends who going throught this.I had to save 2 people from commiting suicide this year itself.What I like in india is the word "us". Dont be to harsh to judge something that you dont knwo. My parents had an arranged marraige and they love each other so are many of my extended family. its not that I'm against love marraiges but wouldnt it be great to fall in love with a guy who is loved by eveyone you love.I'm of a marraigeable age so my mother says so I would know about all this.I know she loves me and if she likes a guy and thinks he suits me i would definately consider since I love her. I have had my share of fun boyfriends😛 but when it comes to making something serious I would like to take the advice of the experts (our elders). also there is no fun when you have done everthing with a guy before marraige the marraige becomes boring (divorces). I thing areranged marraiges is much more exciting and fun 😉.

regards,
sakshi

Hi Angeli/Sakhshi ,

I agree with sakshi,,,,What I can tell u gals from my exp ( I am happily married past 2 years and arranged mrg in US ) that whether you marry arranged or love way , its the relationalship in which you and other person needs happy with after the mrg...and not before!!!!

So how you get married DOES NOT AFFECT! Its about are u happy with person after mrg...

So Dont constraint yourself whether you like love mrg or arranged mrg ..because in both cases it needs equal commitment,understanding,trust and love!!

Hi! Im at university at the moment and this kind of discussion always pops up. Well in my family we have a mix of both arranged and love marriages. My parents have had a arranged marriage, and although they have had there ups and downs (note-every marriage has its problems there is no such thing as a problem free marriage)they are nonetheless very happy with each other and content with their lives. My older brother an sisters have also had arranged marriages, but one of my sisters has only been married for a yr an is really depressed. As her husband can be really big jerk at times, in other words he is a true mommy's boy an never lets my sister forget that for a second.
But still my sister is determined not to walk away from her marriage an will fight for her right to have a happy relationship, and is willing to take anything her husband or in-laws throw at her.
The majority of my cousins have had love marriages an most of them are really happy with each other, but still there is the odd couple or two who seem to constantly fight an create a bad atmosphere. One of my cousins has such a negative attitude towards arranged marriages that she makes me feel ashamed of myself for even considering to have one. An i feel that is really sad, you shouldn't look down on someone for how they get married.
Overall ive learnt the golden rule of marriage is comprise; the ability to change for someone you either already love, or intend to spend the rest of your life with.

well said suki, tinku and sakhshi. Regardless of the type of marraige you have, you will still have to work to keep the marriage together. All marriages have their ups and downs, but the couples which remain together are the ones who have learned to overcome the difficulties of life. As far as living with your in-laws, I don't see anything wrong with that, b/c not all in-laws are like those protrayed in indian shows. If you go into a marraige wiht a negative view of how inlaws should be than, even the smallest diagreement would seem so huge. Personally, I think that you should regard your inlaws like members of your family (i.e. your mother, father, sister, brother) and not like your spouses' family.

like your comments Deepz. Marriage is not a happy happy thing or toy..........it is a commitment........I have arguments before marriage with my parents and my brother then why you think in-laws always make you happy...........so much to tell but I like above comments

I have been married for now 10 years, Arranged marriage. Our love had become more and more big. I know some couple that got love marriage. They have been divorced within 2 years. So what is Love marriage. You get bored.
Arranged marriage, you still find more and more info about the past and it is more excitment. 😆

Originally posted by: maman

I have been married for now 10 years, Arranged marriage. Our love had become more and more big. I know some couple that got love marriage. They have been divorced within 2 years. So what is Love marriage. You get bored.
Arranged marriage, you still find more and more info about the past and it is more excitment. 😆

Not all true I am also married from 10years and mine is love marriage I think this all thing is related to your maturity, education and your values..........no matter if you done anything before marriage or not, if you have in-laws with you or somwhere else.........

Hello Anjali,
For some of them love marriage click and other have arranged marriage. In both marriages you have happiness as well as sorrows. That's life, if need to live with it,Else don't get married. Remain single forever. I think anjali its nothing to do with country you live in. Its how we accept the traditions and culture. If you are happy with american lifestyle be happy, but sorry to say don't say anything about india or any country for that matter. Sorry if i have hurted u, this is my opnion.