GardenHood of the Travelling Rose! - updated pg5!

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-RushTrip-

@-RushTrip-

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 14 years ago

#31

@Jes - thank you hmm the rose will find its way somehow to the princess i feel...

@ Usha - magical hmmm? thank you...i am humbled.

@ Armu - oh wow..that is so sweet of you

@ desi gurl - me too i wonder sometimes, is this really me?

@Nim - ah i donno what i write, its always the inspiration that makes me do what i do...

@Rolzz - well i guess it did touch me poor soul passed around like a hot potato...

@veryberry thank you

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Sookie

@-Sookie-

Voyager

+ 4

Posted: 14 years ago

#32

Vrush, this is by far one the best scene descriptions I have ever read. Not because of the uniqueness of the perspective you have chosen but the way the whole narration started, progressed and ended.

The symmetry of the perspective and that of the prince is not lost. The musings of a flower aligns wonderfully with that of the prince and his idiosyncrasies and that's where the beauty of the piece lies in.

The last paragraph is what makes this piece so wonderful. The plight of the flower from Garden to prince, from prince to the princess and finally discarded as being not wanted. The feeling of rejection that rose feels so darn similar to what the prince goes through which the rose fails to see and understand.

In its own bad karma, it has company.

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-RushTrip-

@-RushTrip-

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 14 years ago

#33

Thank you so much..Sookie....after i had written it..i had wondered...if you had read it what would you think of it...however...did not know if you ventured much on the forum so collected enough nerve to request you to read...

oh all are troubled by insecurities
of being rejected, of taken away liberties

One feels that one has amassed enough worth
to not feel trampled underfoot, crushed undergrowth

As i try to rise above my fears
a light amongst the cloud appears

giving me the strength to start anew
to wash away my tears, wipe away my blues

Edited by rushtrip - 14 years ago

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Sookie

@-Sookie-

Voyager

+ 4

Posted: 14 years ago

#34

Vrush, You are most welcome :-)

I don't venture much into the forum (Any forum, for that matter) and do not browse for more than 2-3 pages. If there is something you wish for me to read, say like this thread, then do PM me. I will get there and read.

You are way too fast in writing verses... :-) And writing about yourself? Self portrait huh...not at all bad :-)

Originally posted by: rushtrip
Thank you so much..Sookie....after i had written it..i had wondered...if you had read it what would you think of it...however...did not know if you ventured much on the forum so collected enough nerve to request you to read...

oh all are troubled by insecurities
of being rejected, of taken away liberties

One feels that one has amassed enough worth
to not feel trampled underfoot, crushed undergrowth

As i try to rise above my fears
a light amongst the cloud appears

giving me the strength to start a new
to wash away my tears, wipe away my blues

Edited by -Sookie- - 14 years ago

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-RushTrip-

@-RushTrip-

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 14 years ago

#35

hmmm yeah... sometimes.. i guess..we reveal more than we want to..
we say more than we ought to...

edit - you caught..me...i dont read when i write...do apologise for grammatical errors..

Edited by rushtrip - 14 years ago

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-RushTrip-

@-RushTrip-

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 14 years ago

#36

Jubilant journey that reaches its destination - Travelling Rose

The rose, the white rose lay there blue
of dreams that out the window flew

waiting in darkness for the Princess or the Prince
valiantly coming to its rescue from where it lay noon since

Just when the darkness seemed complete
came a light of hope bright and replete

It was the Princess rescuing it from certain death
to protect it and the message that lay in its depth

She held it, caressed, just like it were Prince
held it next to her heart, without a wince

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Sookie

@-Sookie-

Voyager

+ 4

Posted: 14 years ago

#37

Just smiled widely :-) I have not watched the episode as am slowly losing interest in the serial (but read written updates)... but I liked the description of what you have written :-)

Somehow your verses are far more powerful and hit the point home way better than the verbose stuff... just an observation..

My previous post: No, it was not about grammatical errors... I was surprised that you could verse so fast and it was about yourself painted quite nicely...

S

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RhealitySux

@RhealitySux

Inactive

Posted: 14 years ago

#38

OMG datz an awesome post 😊

TBH i NEVER read FFs

i usually read the first few lines n then get bored vry easily

so i hv never really "successfully" read an entire post EVER

but this .... oh i m lost for words

its a simple yet realistic slash surreal kinda interpretation, all wrapped in one

just pure awesome girl !!

glad i read it 😊

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-RushTrip-

@-RushTrip-

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 14 years ago

#39

@sookie...thanks i understood what you meant..and also read my mistakes..i try to pay good attention while writing..other than that..its always a rush..and then of course..one trips...
human nature..

@rheality sux..am glad you read and you liked...thank you...

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--Revv--

@--Revv--

Dazzler

Posted: 14 years ago

#40

I am speechless Vroom..Usually u write beautiful passionate updates on the characters..

But here you have delved into the psche of a symbolism - a flower ---> which is used on all major ocassions be it happiness or gloom.. Flower plays such an important role in any relationship!!

The way u have written the journey of the rose- I could feel the journey of emotions too...

The way love unfurls from a bud of attraction to a fully bloomed flower of love and trust ...

Again the way each character reacts to the beauty of the flower is different and their reaction to love is the way they react to the flowers..

He hates flowers - hates emotions.. She loves flowers- accepts her love but fights them for his happiness.. Just the way she wanted the essence of that beauty (love) but when she sees him, she leaves the flower on the plant (runs away)...

Again, he hates flowers but the plant grows in his garden - the way love crept into his well-barricaded heart...

The rose wanted to spread the fragrance of love, it despairs when there is anger around and blooms when love is in the air-------->similar to the heart

Also, the way u portrayed the rose's journey- to me it seemed to be the journey of Maaneet's love..

To borrow ur words - Maan's love is hidden and protected from scornful eyes that were enemies of lovers.

And before it could stop itself from reeling, it was gravity working and itself falling as if from a skyscraper, hurtling down at a breakneck speed --->Maaneet's hearts' would face a similar fate when the truth is revealed 😭😭😭

it cried out but they were arguing amongst themselves instead of attending to its bruises ---> Their hearts would be crying but Egos and sacrifice may come to picture which may crush the cries of their hearts

Pain, rejection. It wanted to go back to the garden, back on the plant---------> The utter desolation of the heart which wants to go back to its unfragmented untouched state, however just like the rose cannot go back to the plant, the heart too would be unable to.

For me ur lines just symbolized Maaneet's love journey and when Geet picked up the rose, it just meant that she would be the one who would have the strength and courage to embrace the love and the difficulties and also be the source of strength to Maan..

Edited by MaaneetDD - 14 years ago

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