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PART 8 :
Very slowly, with her trembling lips, Kashish dares to reach Sujal's cheek. Her lips, emitting heat out of nervousness. She knows not what to make out of this situation - is it need; is it lust or is it love? Whatever it might be, the answer is only one - Sujal!
And today, her feelings are at height! Holding herself is not in her control. As much she wants this right now, she knows not what she has wanted ever to this extent! It could only be his presence, prior to their marriage, when they both were unmarried and were madly in love with each other! But then again, it all has come down to Sujal, that she has wanted ever.
As she places on his cheek, the much desired, sweet, slow kiss - the evidence of her fluttering feelings for him, the windows swing open by the air pressure. As if the whole universe is rejoicing, this ultimate connecting of hearts! This much awaited meeting of two lovers, who were drifted apart by fate!
How miraculous it looks - god, the nature has always rejoiced when these two have met! Be it in the form of rain, when they danced together, to bring out their happiness; to make the world know that yes they are in love, that yes they are soulmates - for being which, you don't necessarily have to get married, it is the heart that chooses, not the marriage that approves a lover! Or in the form of fast moving wind - wind not storm. Because now storm has no place to enter their lives. The only thing they deserve to feel is the tickling caused by soft blowing air. Air, which would flicker Kashish's hair. The delicate tendril of which, would Sujal remove from her face, causing her to shiver a little out of sheer pleasure, as his finger would brush through her skin. Can this be concluded now that pairs are made in heaven?
Unable to control themselves any longer, their heart beating frantically; their eyes and heart filled with nothing but immense love and a little with tears, they embrace each other into a tight hug. The velocity of which is directly propotional to that of their feelings for each other. The depth of their love for each other cannot go unnoticed today; not after this hug, this much desired hug.
For Sujal, it is like he has got his life back at last! Till today he had been living for the sake of living, but henceforth, he'll live because he wants to live! He wants to live with his Kashish; he wants to live for his Kashish. He wants to live not with hatred and grief filled in his heart; he wants to live with a heart filled with immense love for Kashish. Now he won't have to torture himself by remembering all the golden moments he had spent with her, which has lasted no more; rather he would create many more beautiful moments with her, which he'll cherish forever; which they'll cherish forever.
And when someone understands your feelings completely, without you uttering a word, the feeling you get, is just not happiness, it is ecstasy! This is exactly what they both are feeling right now. They pour their heart out through this hug. The hug, they both were craving for.
F - Thodasa pyar hua hai,
Thoda hai baki.
Thodasa pyar hua... hai,
Thoda hai baki.
And rest of the night passes by loving each other; by showing to each other how one is incomplete without the other; how this night is so precious for both of them; how much they both mean to each other; how they are soulmates! How they have all the rights to be with each other. How much they trust each other to give one another the right to take the next step in their marriage. Kashish keeps none of the stone unturn, to show her affection for her beloved husband; for her Sujal! The reciprocation of love from Sujal's side is no less. He for the first time, since their marriage feels that henceforth they are going to live like true husband and wife. They don't have to fake it, that they are happily married. Henceforth, they will indeed be happily married! They will lead a life full of love, full of blessings! This moment holds so much potential. This moment means so much to him. This moment is life for him.
~*~*~
Next Morning
Kashish's sleep gets disturbed by the sunrays entering the room. Not ready to open her eyes yet, she creases her brows, and turns around in order to get a comfortable position which will help her to drift back to sleep.
As she turns around, she unconsciously places her left arm around Sujal's waist, almost like hugging him. The sudden feel, brings a smile on her face. Still not ready to open her eyes, Kashish leisurely starts swirling her finger on him. Her doing so brings a smile on her face, thinking how he must be getting irritated. How his forhead must by now be covered with wrinkles, a clear sign of his irritation.
Feeling pity on him, with her heart full of love for him, her face twinkling with a smile and happiness, she opens her eyes... but what she discovers shocks her! It makes her world go upside down! Sleeping next to him is no one else but Sujal!
But how? How can this be possible? It was not meant to be Sujal! How can this ever happen? No, this... this indeed is some kinda joke.
As her mind starts registering everything; it starts thinking about the previous night, she realizes what a sin she has committed! How? How on earth, can she betray her love? How on earth, could she betray her true lover, her Piyush! The pativrata patni, the widhwa of Piyush, has she no shame? What a sin has she committed! She will need a proper 'shudhikaran' now, in order to get rid of this sin! Piyush... Piyush would certainly understand, how pure she is of heart! This, this was just an in-the-moment act that she had took, just got flowed away. Otherwise she loves Piyush only, her Piyush!
Quickly, she climbs down the bed, her eyes wide open, her drowsiness completely gone. Her whole body heats up. Today also, the reason is Sujal, but how contrasting are the reasons! The previous night she was enjoying the heating up of her body; but today, it is out of shame and guilt for having committed a sin!
Sujal wakes up too, as his eyes meets hers, he recollects all those beautiful moments that they shared last night, thinking of which brings a smile on his face.
Getting up, with a heart filled with joy and love, Sujal blushes and looks towards Kashish and finds her serious. Kashish cascades down her eyes as soon as it meets his beautiful pair of eyes, out of regret and shame. Sujal unaware of the real reason of her cascading down her eyes, takes it as a gesture of shyness, that she is feeling, after having shared the night with him. Fully occupied by the thoughts of the previous night and living in a dreamy world, Sujal giving her a last loving looking, goes out of the room.
Kashish sticks to her position, utterly shocked. The whole world swirls around her eyes. She cannot be addressed as a sanskari patni, no not anymore! Not after she has betrayed the trust of her husband Piyush. Oh why? why? why? Why didn't she check her emotions? How could she even for a moment think that she is the widhwa of Piyush Raheja? She is, she was and she will remain forever Mrs. Piyush Raheja!
How could she allow someone to touch her? Allow? Who is she kidding? She provoked him to touch her! She craved for his touch! So why is she feeling disgusted now? Why is her eyes watering up, with a feeling of guilt? Why is she thinking that she 'allowed' him to touch her? As if he was the one, craving to touch her! Was it not the other way around?
Unable to decide what to do, frustrated she gets into the bathroom and turns on the shower. Standing under the shower, not caring that she is fully dressed, she rubs off her hands, her face, everything, with a feeling of disgust, that she let him touch her! What became of her the previous night that she didn't think twice before letting him to touch her? But was it he who took the first step? Was it not her who encouraged him, by coming closer to him?
She cries and cries and cries! Her eyes blazing with anger. She is angry again with him, but this time the reason is different. Today, she is angry because she knows, she has realized quite a lot of times, Sujal holds the power to make her go weak on her knees by that one look of his. The look which reflects his innocence; his pure heart; his unshattered and clean feelings for her. She cries, almost shouts to release her pent up emotions - her anguish, her hatred. Today all these emotions, she is sharing with him!Because today, these feelings are not only for Sujal, that she is feeling for, they are for herself too. She is hating herself for instead of ruining the moment, she relished it! She is hating him, because he created a havoc last night, like always, that made her go blank. But if he does create a havoc always, so was there anything new he did last night? Should he be blamed for doing something unintentionally, on a regular basis? If yes, so why has she not ever punished him for creating the havoc prior to yesterday? Why suddenly she wants to bash him with the words of hatred? Is it indeed hatred for him, or is it her guilt that's provoking her to take the step?
"Piyush...",
she shouts, turning off the shower. As if the more she'll shout, she'll be able to get rid of this burden of committing the sin!
"Ye maine kya kar diya Piyush? Ye maine kya kar diya?",
she curses, sliding down against the wall, she sits down on the bathroom floor, crying profusely.
"Kyun nahi roka apne mujhey Piyush? Kyun ussi pal apne mujhey apne paas nahi bula liya Piyush? Kyun?"
she asks.
"Jo... jo haath apke khoon se rangey hain, maine... maine uss haath ko... kaise Piyush... kaise uss hath ko khud ko chuney diya? Kaise?",
she shouts, she cries.
She continues crying.
"Nafrat... nafrat ho rahi hai khudse aj mujhey!"
Looking heavenwards she asks for pardon,
"Ho sakey to mujhey maaf kar dena Piyush. Maaf kar dena..."
Unable to understand what else can she say for committing such a shameful offence, she cascades down her eyes, out of shame.
Rubbing off her tears, Kashish gets up and says, spitting venom through her each word,
" Ye mat sochna Mr. Sujal Garewal ki tumne mere pyar ko hasil kar liya hai. Tum jeet gaye ho! Main tumhari rahon mein itne kantey bichaungi, tumhari zindagi mein itna zeher bhar dungi, ki tum aaj jis pyar ki ibadat karte ho, jis pyar ko tum apni zindagi samjhte ho, kal ussi pyar ke liye tumhare dil mein itni nafrat hogi, ke tum khud se puchoge ke 'Iss Pyar Ko Kya Naam Doon?' "
-THE END-
(12.2.2017)
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