#4 Arshi FF: Smitten By The Neighbour ~Next Thread Link on Page 146~ - Page 80

Arnav followed Khushi and sat next to her on the bed. Holding her hands in his, he looked at her, but she refused to look at him. Yet, she did not withdraw her hands from his hold and that gave him some hope. "What do you want to talk about?" she asked with a grumpy face, looking at him from the corner of her eye. Arnav entwined his fingers with hers, and closed his eyes as he took a deep breath. Looking at her, he began to talk, "I know you're pretty mad at me, right now, and probably don't even want to look at me" He heard her huff, but decided to let it go. "You have every right to be angry, Khushi. I said some really hurtful things. But I did not mean it at all. I said it all in anger. I'm sincerely regretting it; it makes me really sad when I think about the way I hurt you. I'm sorry for all the tears I've brought in your eyes. Khushi I feel so guilty right now, because all I can think about is how I broke your heart. You love Samrat more than anyone else in the world, and it was very insensitive of me to say such horrible things. I know that he too loves you the most. You are, and will always be his Mommy. And there's no one who can take your place in his life. I know sorry is not enough because I screwed up really bad. But for whatever its worth I want to just say that, you're very special and close to Samrat. And to me too" At this, Khushi looked into his eyes and she smiled slowly, knowing that he meant every single word. Arnav paused for a minute to breathe in relief when he saw her smile. At least, she was listening to what he had to say, and did believe his words and feelings. "Khushi, there's another thing I want to say to you. Something that I should have said long ago, without keeping to to myself. Dear, the thought of you makes me smile, and I cannot help but keep falling in love with you, every single day. Over the past few months, our relationship has changed, for good, to such an extent that now I cannot imagine even a minute without you."

Arnav's voice choked and Khushi's eyes welled up with tears knowing how difficult it must be for him to speak his heart out. He had been cheated by the one whom he once loved, and she realised how difficult it must have been for him to believe in her and fall in love again. "I'm sorry I'm choking up, but it isn't easy for me to speak my feelings out loud. When I was hurt and rejected by Swathi, I thought I could never love anyone again. I felt like it was the end of the world for me. I feel like I was dying inside my head, like I was almost dead. I kept struggling to stay afloat, pushing myself through work and strain. I needed to get out of the tightening grip in my guts. But I felt like I had been swimming against the currents of a whirlpool, and my efforts had not gotten me anywhere, I still kept sinking further toward the eye of the whirlpool. It was so hard to move. I used to wish I could just slip away peacefully, and be forgotten. There was no joy in anything anymore; I just couldn't rationalize myself out of my depression." Khushi shifted closer to him and wiped the tears that just escaped his eye. She then placed one of her hand over his, which were clasped around her other hand.

"I was so angry with myself; so angry at the world. I wondered how everyone could be so happy when I was depressed. No one, not even Ma, knows of the time where I once even thought of putting my life to an end." Arnav heard a gasp escape from Khushi's lips and he looked at her with a sad smile. "I picked up the blade to slit my wrist, and that was when I had a sudden realization. My Samrat still needed me. I could not just ignore my little boy whom I loved so much. I took a few steps back and almost laughed at my stupidity of thinking that suicide was the solution. How could I become so selfish to ignore my son; the little child who was just a three month old infant? I decided to gather myself for the sake of my baby. Samrat became my strength. He became my torchlight in the darkness. He taught me how to live. I learnt to smile and be happy. I realised that it was not the end of the world. Swathi was an end to a chapter; a closed chapter in my life. Samrat was the one who helped me rediscover my purpose in life. He taught me how to start my day with love, fill my day with love, and end my day with love. And as years passed by, I became more open and ready to receive the very best of everything this world had to offer, knowing I deserve it."

Arnav looked up at Khushi and saw her watching him in awe. He smiled as he brushed her cheek with his fingers, and she looked away for a moment, with a smile on her lips. Arnav tipped her chin, and she resumed looking into his eyes. All of her anger had evaporated like snow on fire. She noticed his expression turn a bit serious as he spoke again. "Khushi, when I met you for the first time, I realised that you had something in common with me. Pain. It was evident in everything you did. You too had withdrawn yourself inside a shell, like I had done earlier. Later when I heard about Rishabh, I understood that you were fighting a battle similar to the one I had been fighting. At least I had Samrat with me; but you had none, except your Mother-in-law. I knew you needed a lot of help. You too were drowning and someone had to help you out by tossing a rope to you, before you were lost and forgotten. That was when I saw you getting closer to Sam. Initially I did dislike you for being so cold whenever I tried talking to you. My intention was to help you, but something always went wrong. But when I saw you thaw while with Samrat, I knew that he was the only one who could bring the old Khushi back." Pausing for a moment, he looked at Khushi who had given him her undivided attention, and he resumed talking. "The day Sam met with an accident, and when I learnt that you had said something to him in anger, I lost my cool. I couldn't bear to watch my son hurt. I thought I could have some peace if I hurt the one who hurt my son. I was wrong; utterly wrong. And do you know what was the first among many things Samrat asked me when he came to consciousness? He asked for you; for his Miss Khushi. And later, when I told him that you were admitted in the hospital because of me, he was really upset. He asked me how I could say such things to you. At that moment, I realised that he was so attached to you, that he had forgotten his own pain. He was more disturbed because you were in the hospital."

Khushi smiled to herself when he reminded her of those memories. Arnav stopped talking and asked her what amused her. She said, "Now, when I look back at it all, I feel it happened for a purpose. Even if it was a horrible time for all of us to go through it back then, right now it feels as if it was a conspiracy to bring me closer to Samrat. And thus, closer to you." Arnav smiled and kissed the back of her hand when she said that, "Yeah, I agree. The hospital visits ended up in Sam choosing you as my bride. I still remember how shocked I was. That was the first time I swore in front of my parents! I was horrified about getting married again." Khushi narrowed her eyes, "And what do you think about it now?" "I think it was the best decision I have ever made" Khushi withdrew her hands from his hold and leaned closer to him. He pulled her into his arms and both of them leaned against the bedpost. She felt him heave a sigh after which he spoke again, "You've been there for Sam at every moment he needed you. You gave him so much of love, that at times, he forgot my existence too. And in spite of knowing what a wonderful Mommy you are to him, I said all that shit. I know I crossed limits and I wish I could take back everything I said. I wish I could rewind time; I would undo every single thing I said and did which hurt you. What I really want to say is that I'm sorry for being mean, Khushi. I know that you didn't deserve to be hurt like that, and I want you to know that I am very sorry. Please forgive me." Khushi snuggled closer to him, "I forgive you Arnav. I understand you were angry because of Swathi's topic. I should have been more thoughtful about how sensitive the custody issue is for you." Looking up at him, she said, "But something tells me that we mustn't be worried about it. The whole world knows what a wonderful father you've been to Samrat. Anyone can testify the love and bond you two share. Not even Swathi can separate you two. Samrat will always stay with you; with us. He's always going to be our son. I strongly believe in it, and I want you to believe the same." Arnav nodded and patted her cheek, "I will. And thank you Khushi" he said to which she frowned, "What for?" He smiled as he kissed her forehead while whispering against her skin, "For being there for me and our son at all times" She closed her eyes as she felt goose bumps over her body as his lips touched her. He pulled away and leaned against her forehead, and Khushi couldn't help but feel contended in his arms.

A while later, she pulled away and Arnav looked at her with a frown. "I have to make Samrat eat his dinner. It's almost time." She explained with a genuine smile. He shook his head and refused to let her go, "Ma will feed Samrat. You stay here" Khushi tried reasoning with him, "But Arnav..." "No Ifs or Buts. Stay." Arnav said it with such intensity in his voice, that she could not help but lean back into his arms. Moments passed by yet none spoke. Then, Arnav cleared his throat to talk. "Khushi?" "Hmmm?" "You said you heard me talk to Ma. About... not having another child." Khushi sat up straight, without looking at him. "I did" she admitted softly. He turned to look at her and took her hands in his, "I need to know what exactly you heard" When she looked up at him, he said, "I don't want any misunderstanding to be there between us. I need to know what you heard, so that I can explain under which context I said it." Khushi shook her head, "It's okay Arnav. I don't want to talk about it" "But I want to" he said.

When Khushi did not say anything further, he said to her, "You told me that you heard me telling Ma that I did not want a child from you. You even connected it to us using protection when we made love..." "...When I seduced to you into shagging me" Khushi interrupted him in a dry, dull voice, reminding him of his words. Arnav sighed, "Khushi, I'm sorry I said that. I agree, it does sound cheap, and I never meant it that way. I know you were trying to just make me feel better, but I guess my worries and insecurities about Sam got the worst of me." Khushi looked at him from the corner of her eyes, "Do you really think that I seduced you Arnav?" He shook his head, "No. You did not." He said sincerely, "It was an absolutely wonderful and beautiful moment of love we shared. I agree that the first time we did it at the resort, we were just desperate to feel each other. You were worried about me, and the first time you touched me so intimately, it felt like a huge tidal wave just pulled me into the deepest oceans. Surprisingly, I wasn't drowning or suffocating. It just felt... heavenly." Khushi blushed profusely. This was the first time they were openly discussing their sex life without any inhibitions. Arnav smiled when he saw her turn to a shade of red and chuckled to himself. This woman was unpredictable. At one moment, she would be wild and at another, she would turn coy. "It felt heavenly just that one time?" she asked without looking at him, her voice in almost a breath. He leaned closer and brushed her lips against her cheek. Inching closer, he kissed her earlobe and whispered, "Darling, every time I am inside of you, I live in paradise." She gasped as she felt his hand sliding under her kurta top, caressing her waist, and proceeding upwards. "Arnav..." she breathed, without giving into him, and gently pushed him aside. "You were saying something important" she whispered. She could not remember what exactly it was, for the love of God. "Uh-huh" came the deep voiced reply, and he pulled her closer to her to feel her against him. "Arnav, stop. Not now. We need to, uh, finish talking first. Uh, baby. Yes, about having a baby" she said, finally remembering what it was.

That seemed to do the trick, for Arnav pulled away in a moment and looked at her. He closed his eyes to divert his mind from her luscious lips and her curvaceous body. Damn, she was as potent as liquid heroine. "Ah, yes." he said as he cleared his throat. Looking at her again, with a serious expression, he said, "You told me that you heard me telling Ma that I did not want a child from you. And you thought that I was using protection just because I did not want you to be a mother to my child, biologically. Right?" Khushi nodded her head and said, "I even heard you saying that after Swathi left you, you struggled a lot to raise Samrat up. And you are not ready for a second child because you doubt that I too would leave you someday, and you cannot take up the responsibility of raising another child." Arnav frowned, "I did say that. But you ought to know under what circumstance I said it." Cupping her face in his large hands, he said, "I know you are nothing like Swathi. Hell, no woman could be as selfish as her. But my past experiences have had a very negative impact on me. And I was scared. You know why? Because I thought you never loved me. I thought you still loved Rishi, and were not yet over him" Khushi looked into his eyes, "But Arnav, we did make love. Wasn't that enough for you to understand that I do love you? Or did you think I was just..." Arnav shook his head, "I knew all along Khushi. But for some odd reasons, I wanted you to say it so that I could believe what I saw in your eyes for me was true. Remember the time, after we had sex at the resort, when you almost walked out of the house and I stopped you from going? You did admit that we had great sex, but clearly told me that you couldn't love me, even if you did not hate me. You said you couldn't fall in love, again. I cannot give anything to you; I am empty, bitter, shattered and broken to pieces, you had told me. You had loved Rishi too much, and you said you could not imagine anyone else in his place. Tell me Khushi, how what was I supposed to think?"

It was then Khushi connected the dots and understood the whole picture. Arnav said, "I did see your feelings in your eyes, Khushi. But I always brushed that aside, because I still continued to be under the impression that Rishabh was still in between us. I know we enjoyed what we shared physically. But I couldn't break my promise of waiting for you until you had willingly let go of Rishi and accept me whole-heartedly. I was scared; what if you regretted after becoming pregnant with my child? Or what if you did not want to stay with me for reasons unknown? All sorts of thoughts began to flood my mind. I thought, what if you took the baby away with you? I would never be at peace knowing that a part of me is away from me. Or what if you decided to leave the baby? I am growing older and I am not that energetic as I used to be five years ago. How would I look after the baby?" Pausing for a minute, he continued, "Khushi, you only heard me saying that I don't want another child. But you did not hear me when I told Ma that someday, I would love to have a baby that looks just like you." Khushi's lips parted in shock when she heard Arnav say those words. "Khushi, I would love that. A tiny little girl who has big doe eyes, a button-like nose and beautiful smile like yours. But I fear, Khushi, because I have already been burnt once, by Swathi. It's not something that is so easy to forget. I wouldn't want it to happen again." Khushi covered her mouth with her palms, "This was the reason you did not want another child?" Arnav nodded in confusion, "Yes. Why? What did you think?" Khushi closed her eyes and shook her head in regret for misunderstanding him, "I thought you did not want to have a child from me because I assumed you were still in love with Swathi and were unable to forget her since Samrat was in front of your eyes, all the while, thus reminding you of her."

Arnav's jaw hung open, "What? Why would you think that I was still in love with her after I clearly told you that you are the only one for me? Did you think I was making false promises to you?" Khushi was unable to look into his eyes, "I did not know what I was thinking Arnav. I'm really sorry." Then looking up at him she said, "You need to understand one thing, Arnav. I am not Swathi. I am not leaving you or going anywhere. You, Samrat and I will always be together." Pausing for a moment, she continued, "If you do not want to have a second child, I am completely fine with your decision. I understand you do not want to regret later on, and I am perfectly okay with not having a baby of my own. At least, I have Samrat, on whom I can shower all of my love on. I can live with it, Arnav. And in turn, Samrat too loves me. Maybe it isn't in my destiny to bear a child, and I am alright with it. I'm just glad I have you and Samrat." Arnav pulled her into his arms, "Khushi I'm glad you understand. But why do you think that it isn't your fate to have a child of your own, within you?" She raised her head to look at him and said, "What do you mean?" Arnav smiled, "I'm not saying we will never have children. Now that I know your do love me, and that there's nothing or no one in between us, I promise you that we will have as many children as you want. But now's not the right time. This phase of my life is already stressful for me, with Swathi's chapter being reopened in my life in connection with Sam's custody case. This period is certainly not the right time for us to have a baby. Let's wait for another few months until the custody case is settled. After that, I promise to give you as many babies as you want"

Khushi nodded her head with a broad smile. How wonderful it would feel to have a baby within her! She pictured in anticipation the day when they would be seated just as they were now, except she would be heavily pregnant, while Arnav and Samrat would be talking to the little baby, preferably a baby girl, inside her belly. "Arnav?" she called out to him, as she snaked her arms round his waist. "Yes Khushi?" he said, sniffing the top of her head. "I love you Arnav" she said. The room was filled with silence, and she could sense that he was smiling ear to ear. She sat up straight and held his hands. He watched her intently with a gentle smile as she opened her mouth to speak, "Thank you for coming into my life, Arnav. I never thought that I would be as lucky to have you, and now that I have you, I don't ever want to let go. You have given me so much love, joy, and happiness that none other has ever given. I'm blessed to have you as my husband. You mean the world to me, Arnav, and though sometimes we have problems and argue about it, I know we can get through them. Thank you for always being there by my side whenever I need you Arnav. I promise, I will always be here for you. You and I have just taken over a special part in each other's lives and we can't let go at all. I have never said this earlier, but today I want to say it all to you. You are my life, my reason to live. I love you Arnav and always will. When I am with you, the world goes away. I feel only you. I breathe only you. I sense only you. Every moment we've spent together is very special to me. I love you with all that I am, all that I was and all that I'll ever be. Arnav, I want to let you know that you make me so happy, the happiest I've ever been. You've given me the most amazing feeling of being in love with you. I just can't wait to see what the future holds for us. And more than anything in this world, I just want to spend the rest of my life with you. I love you with all my heart and soul, always and forever"

By the time Khushi finished talking, Arnav's eyes were twinkling with joy. "Khushi, thank you for accepting me as I am, along with my flaws and imperfections. I cannot thank you enough for how you've changed my life for good. Every morning I wake up only because I look forward to spending another day with you, who's as beautiful on the outside as on the inside. Each time I look at your face, I feel my heart melt with love, and I just cannot stop thinking about you. Every time I look into your eyes, I remind myself how wonderful and complete my life is. Holding you in my arms and spending a few moments hugging you is all I need after a hectic day's work. You are like a healing soul that drives away worries, pains and aches. Every since I've realised how much I am in love with you, I find my life looking brighter. At times, I catch myself grinning and am surprised to find myself smiling for no specific reason. Yet, in spite of all of it, I cause tears in your eyes. My ability to disappoint you and hurt you breaks my heart Khushi, and if I could change one thing, I would change this. I know how much you've loved Samrat and I cannot thank you enough for being his Mommy in the true sense. I am forever grateful for letting him see his Mommy in you. And when the right time comes, I promise to have many more children with you. Khushi, I may not get the time or a chance to tell you this every day, but I just want you to know that you mean the world to me. And if I ever get a chance to relive my life, I would start it from the day we got married. Thank you for being with me through thick and thin. I love you so much baby, and I never want to lose the love we share between us. Even if I were to die, in my last breath I'll think of you, I'll close my eyes and see your face, and the memory will be as fresh as from the very first day I saw you. And I will hear your voice; I will feel your arms around me, your hands burning me, your lips kissing me. I will feel it all and I will still love you. Even if I die, I'll still be yours. You will have me as yours, always and forever"

The moment he finished talking, Khushi pulled Arnav as close as possible to her, and hugged him tightly. "God, I love you so much, Arnav" she said as she tangled her hand in his hair, while holding on to him. She did not even realise she was in his lap, almost straddling him. Moments later, he spoke with a heavy voice. "I'm really hungry, Khushi." He said, out of the blue, while he grabbed her about the waist, "But not for food." Khushi knew perfectly what he meant and she lay back on the bed, pulling her along with him, never letting him go away. She needed to feel him right now and the desire within her, shot up multiple folds when she felt his weight on top of her body. He pulled away from the hug so that he could kiss her luscious lips. One thing she could say about Arnav was that he was a master at getting her clothes off without her knowledge. Not only that, he knew her body better than she did. Just when she felt her toes curl, she felt him leave her side. He pulled out a foil from the drawer and with trembling hands, he fumbled to rip it open. Khushi propped herself on her elbows and pulled the packet away from him. "Khushi... Protection..." he whispered in a ragged breath. She breathed, "I need to feel you Arnav. All of you. I don't want anything between us. Not even this rubber sheath" she said as she tossed the foil back into the drawer. He was about to say something else, but she said, "Don't worry. I'll have the after-pill tomorrow morning." And without giving him another chance to speak, she pulled him onto her. He was unusually tender and warm. And it was pleasantly different from the times when they had had some heated sex. This time, he took his time to please her. He was skilled in memorizing everything that made her moan, and used it so much that she was practically sobbing with ecstasy into the pillow. It was then that he thrust himself into her and her eyes almost rolled back with the way he pleasured her slowly.

Arnav knew when to change his rhythm and he was right on cue as noises started to pour from her parted lips. Soon he was lifting himself above her so he could get deeper, faster. In moment's time, he felt her climax but she also marked it with one of the sexiest sounds of release that he'd ever heard, and it just heightened his own. Those last few strokes he'd given her before his own release were hard and deep. He buried his face in her shoulder to resist shouting out loud and alerting the whole house with what they were doing. Khushi could feel him pulse within her and besides the act itself, she found it so amazing. Then he went slack and brought his full weight down on her with a muffled moan into her shoulder. Actually she was surprised she noticed he did that because she swore she lost her own sight for a moment. Also with his weight on her, she could barely take a breath but loved the feeling so much, she didn't say anything. He came down on her with the last drop draining out of him and kissed her. Then he raised his head and gave her a drop dead gorgeous grin, "f**k me, I'm completely spent." Khushi burst into laughter. She had heard him swear earlier, when in anger. Yet for some reason she found it incredibly sexy when he said it this time. Maybe it was because of the reference it was used in. Regardless, it didn't bother her in the least.

He bent his head down and kissed her sweaty forehead. She seemed to have been lost. "We just had dessert before dinner, Khushi" he growled into her ears. "You're truly shameful at times, Arnav" She started blushing until her cheeks were warm. He gave her another sinful grin "Oh honey, you have no idea!" He then took a deep breath knowing he was going to disappoint her as much as him with his next words, "Khushi, we need to go downstairs for dinner. The whole family must be waiting for us" Khushi's eyes grew wide, "Oh dear heavens, I didn't even think about that. You had me so worked up." He grinned again, "Come on. Get dressed." He said getting up with a reluctant groan and putting his slacks on.

Khushi was completely embarrassed at getting up and dressing in front of him, even though he acted as if it were as natural as breathing. This was something she wasn't used to at all. Earlier, every time they made love, Khushi would wrap a sheet round her and walk to the bathroom to get dressed. This time, when she was about to do the same, Arnav stopped her and asked her to dress up in front of him. She noticed he was busy zipping his pants and had just picked up his t-shirt. Reluctantly she sat up and reached for her clothes on the floor. As she started to put them on she realized that it seemed awfully quiet in the room. Glancing up she stilled. Arnav was just standing a few feet away, with an arrogant grin on his face and his hands folded across his chest as he watched her. "Arnav! What the! Quit staring!" she almost shrieked. "You have to admit, the view is exquisite." He said huskily as she blushed scarlet all the way down to her breasts. "And how it turns me on!" She quickly pulled her kurta over her head, doing her best to ignore him. She finished dressing and was surprised when he pulled her back into his arms for another long deep kiss. Before they were about to leave the room, Arnav said to her in a seductive groan, "Khushi, don't wait up for too long, chatting with Ma and Payal after dinner. I have something in mind for the night" By the time Khushi could react too his suggestive words, he opened the door and stepped out of the room, after winking at her.

As expected, the whole family was present and were waiting for Arnav and Khushi for dinner. None of them said a word, but when Khushi looked up at Arnav, she saw Akaash passing him a wicked grin to which Arnav only grinned slyly. And as if on cue, Payal looked at Khushi and tried to suppress a smile. Khushi could only wish to disappear into the floor. "Dad... Khushi, Samrat and I would like to shift back to our apartment" she heard Arnav say. Arvind frowned at the sudden decision. "Why is that?" he asked. Arnav swallowed the food in his mouth, "I spoke to Sharona today and she told me that the inspections for Sam's custody case would start in three weeks. And I personally feel that it would be better if we were staying at our house instead of staying here. That way, the opposition would not say that I am still dependent on my parents. And anyway, we have been staying here for quite a long time now. I'd like to move back to the apartment with Khushi and Samrat, if it is okay with Khushi" All eyes turned to look at Khushi and she looked at Arnav, who smiled at her. She returned his smile with a soft one. She knew she could follow this man to any corner of the world, and she said, "As Arnav wishes. I'm perfectly alright with it" Arnav nodded and she looked at her plate wondering what made him make a decision of moving back to the apartment. She heard him say that they would move back in the weekend, and all of them reluctantly agreed.

As Arnav had asked her, she did not spend much time chatting around after dinner. In fact, she was more anxious to get back to the room. Firstly, she needed to ask him about his sudden decision to get back to the apartment. And when she thought of the second reason, she couldn't help but blush. When she had gone back to the room, she realised he was in the bathroom. She sat at the edge of the bed, waiting for him to come out. When he was done with his bath, she almost pounced on him with her load of questions. He chuckled, "I already told everyone why I wanted to move back to the apartment. It will help us during the custody" Khushi nodded with a smile. His reason was genuine enough. When she was about to go for bath, he pulled her hand and she ended up in his arms. "There's another reason I wanted to shift to the apartment" he whispered, and she swallowed hard when she smelt his masculine scent mixed with soap. Her hands were resting on his chest, and she wished to run her hands through his hair that was still dripping with water. "What other reason?" she asked, trying hard not to choke. He grinned deviously, "Imagine the time we could spend together once Sam is off to school. We could make all the noise we want when we are at the apartment." That got a blush out of her. He chuckled when she pushed him away and ran into the bathroom. He smiled to himself and then looked at the door with a devilish grin. He walked to the door and turned the knob, pleased to find out that she hadn't locked the door. When he opened the door, he saw that Khushi had just turned the shower on, and was shocked to see him standing there. "Arnav!" she almost breathed in horror and tried to cover her bare body with her hands. "I told you I had plans for the night" he said with a naughty wink as he shut the door closed behind him. And he certainly made the rest of the night eventful.