#2 ArShi SS: The Dark Silhouette || Last Chap:Pg 102 || *COMPLETED* - Page 62

The next morning, Khushi was discharged from the hospital after all her reports were clear. She was asked by the doctor to follow certain instructions and precautions to maintain a healthy pregnancy. Arnav too made sure he understood every single point the doctor had advised. He had promised himself to take good care of Khushi and to never hurt her again, and would do his best to keep her happy. Garima and Shashi hugged Khushi and told her that they would keep visiting her at her house to which she just nodded with a small smile. As they stepped out of the hospital, Arnav extended his hand to help her sit in the car, but she refused his help. Arnav knew she was angry for what he did to her, and decided to talk to her once they reached home. The twenty-minute drive was spent in absolute silence. She refused to look at his face and chose to look outside the window, and watch the road that led to Arnav's house. Arnav too hesitated to say anything to her, fearing he would upset her, again. He had been too scared to say anything, fearing that she would get upset over it. He had died a little when he had seen her so weak, delicate and critical at the hospital, and could not afford to come across such a case again. Once they were at home, Arnav helped Khushi out of the car. He felt her body turn stiff when he held her shoulders as she got down, and his heart ached at her coldness. He deserved it though. Once she was out, she simply walked into the house, straight to her room where she was staying since a week. Arnav helplessly watched her go, and before he could say anything to her, she shut the door and locked it.

An hour later, Seeta knocked at her room and Khushi opened the door. Arnav was seated in the living room, working on his laptop. He had decided to work from home since he did not want to leave Khushi alone, even for a minute. When Khushi took the tray of fruits from Seeta, Arnav happened to get a glimpse of the room behind her. A huge suitcase was placed near the door, and another similar bag was open on the floor, in which she seemed to be packing all of her things. Seeta too noticed it and looked at Arnav, who asked her to leave immediately. Seeta knew that her master needed to speak with his wife in private, and so she excused herself and walked to the kitchen in silence. Before Khushi was about to lock the door again, Arnav entered the room.

"Khushi, you're going somewhere? Why are you packing?" he asked as he tried not to panic at the sight of those suitcases. Khushi refused to look at him, instead, she picked up her clothes and folded it, neatly placing it into the bag. Arnav realised she was leaving him and going away. Arnav walked to her and held her shoulders, "Khushi, please talk to me." He said in a choked voice, trying to refrain from letting tears fall of his face, "I know you're mad at me, and you have every right to be. I made a huge mistake. I should have trusted you. I never should have believed the videos and the pictures. Most importantly, I should have never been such an animal. I know I said and did shitty things. But I'm sorry Khushi. I really am. Please look at me. Shout at me if you want to; even slap me. I deserve it. But please don't ignore me." She didn't say anything. Arnav bent walked closer to her and with his finger raised her chin. Still she didn't look at him, "Khushi I'm sorry I did not trust you. Instead, I chose to believe evidences what Ratna planted." Khushi looked at him, wide-eyed. He nodded, "Those videos and photos were sent by Ratna. And Karan Singhania helped her with it. I would have never known anything if Karan hadn't called to apologise and confess to you when you were in the hospital. He spoke everything when he was in a drunken state. I went to his place and dragged him to the Raizada house, where he confessed everything. Ratna's truth, of what she did to me fourteen years back was also out. Anjali and Akaash too learnt her truth and then decided to send her to the asylum." He looked up at her, watching him with a blank expression, "Nothing can go wrong anymore Khushi. No more of Ratna in our lives. I promise to set things right. Please give me a chance."

Suddenly, he noticed that she was crying. Tears kept falling off her eyes and she stood in defeat in front of him. He had chosen to believe the false evidence over her words. He did not trust her. Even at present, he chose to believe her only because Karan had called up and confessed. He had even gone to the extent of implying that she was characterless and had cheated on him when he doubted that the child within her was really his. Right now, he chose to make promises to her only because he was guilty. Maybe if Karan wouldn't talk to him, he would not have believed her. These thoughts made Khushi cry bitterly. Arnav held her hands in his, "Khushi?" he called out to her, worried as to what was making her cry so badly. "What happened, Khushi?" He shook her shoulders, but she kept crying. "Khushi?'' he again called. "Don't touch me" she whispered brokenly. Arnav's hands fell from her shoulders as he felt the ground beneath his feet slipped away. He took a step away from her. "What?" he whispered, his voice too hoarse to speak. "Don't touch me" she said again between her hitched breaths. This time he heard her loud and clear, even if it sounded like a mere whisper. She looked up at him and he looked into her eyes. This time, his heart broke. She stood in front of him with her eyes full of regret and defeat. His balance disintegrated and he felt his vision blurring up as tears filled his own eyes. He couldn't stand in front of her and look at the regret in her eyes. Without another word he left the room before he would break down.

Khushi fell on her knees and cried bitterly. She had finally given up. She just couldn't stay with a man who needed proof to believe her. There was no trust in this relationship. Her marriage was coming to an end and her life was falling apart. She had loved him, yet he treated her as if she was a piece of garbage. And now, he was back to her because a third person confessed to him that she wasn't at fault. She looked at her pale, empty hands and wondered how life had cheated her with its cruel games. She was pregnant with his child and she wasn't even sure if her love was still alive for him. The thought scared her. All was lost. All the smiles, closeness, warmth, love... Everything was gone. She thought they shared something magical. But she was wrong. It was nothing. All magic came to an end, leaving behind an ugly face of bitter reality. Every single bond between them vanished. Bitter realization dawned on her. Love couldn't be forced. She had lost her love for Arnav. She just couldn't feel anything for him anymore. All she felt was suffocation. All she remembered was how he humiliated her. She needed to get out of his house as soon as possible.

When she stepped out of the room, dragging her bags with her, she saw Arnav coming up to her. He was seated in the living room, waiting for her to calm down so that he could talk to her. But when he saw that she had packed her bags and was moving towards the main door, all his hopes of her staying back died. "You're going? Are you leaving me?" he asked and she looked at him with expressionless eyes. Arnav felt his hands and feet turn cold. "Khushi, No..." was all he could manage to say. She stood watching him, looking into his eyes. He looked... broken. A part of her wanted to wipe away his tears and hug him, but she couldn't come to do that. Then, she heard him say, "You cannot leave, Khushi. I cannot let you leave. I cannot live without you..." "...And I cannot live with you, Arnav" she heard herself roar at him. Khushi was no longer capable of thinking. She knew she was going to spill out all of her venom and wanted to avoid hurting him, but she was too hurt to have a control over herself. Arnav felt himself go still when she spoke.

"Give me one good reason for me to stay, Mr. Arnav Singh Raizada? And before you say that I'm pregnant with your child, let me remind you- This child belongs to me and only me. You lost every f**king right the day you doubted if this child was yours... I have no reason to stay with you Arnav. From day one, you've only hurt me. You've given me nothing else but pain. In spite of loving you, you chose to distrust me. You believed an outsider over me" Arnav looked at the floor, and closed his eyes as she spoke. She was angry; she was right; and he deserved it all. "You believed me only after Karan called up. What if he didn't? Would you still believe me?" Arnav kept silent. He knew the answer to it. She smiled bitterly, "I'll answer it for you. No; you wouldn't believe me, because you just do not know to trust Arnav!" She felt tears well up in her eyes, "Even yesterday, you just... just shagged me like an animal. You treated me as if I was some piece of cheap meat for your sexual pleasure. You... you disgust me Arnav" He looked up at her, unable to believe what she just said. But he did not have the guts to deny it. She was right about it; about him. He was nothing less of a monster. "You abused me, Arnav. You humiliated me. You... you just left me, cold and alone, on that bathroom floor. I was shivering; yet you did not care, you just f**ked me and dumped me on the ground. You almost killed my baby! How could you do this to me and my baby? How could you abuse me when you yourself were abused once? I thought you would know how painfully degrading and humiliating it could be. But no. I was wrong. You are no different from Ratna Raizada. And at this point, I don't regret anything I said in the video that you saw. You are nothing but a brute, a monster, an animal."

Arnav felt his breath leave his body. He could not even deny what she said or justify any of his actions. It was all true. He became the abuser whom he hated all his life. He became Ratna Raizada. "You too are an animal, Arnav; a sick monster, just like your step-mother. And I cannot stay with a sick minded beast like you" Arnav felt the earth come to a halt. Looking at her, he knew it was all over. God alone knew how, but he dragged his feet close to her and looked into her icy eyes and said, "Do you hate me, Khushi?" His words made her go numb. She could not come to hate him. But did she love him? She didn't know. "I don't hate you" she answered truthfully, causing a spark of hope in his heart. Just when he smiled in hope at her answer, she said, "But, I'm not sure if I love you anymore" She heard Arnav gasp, but she continued while looking away from him, "I cannot stay around you, Arnav. It hurts me too much. Maybe we'll be right for each other some years from now, when we are a few years older. Maybe. Just maybe. But right now, I'm poison to you, and you're poison to me." She dragged the bags across the floor and took a step ahead. He followed her, "Please don't go, Khushi. Please. I'm sorry. I'll do anything to set things right. I'll do anything to make you happy." She looked back at him; he was almost begging her. "You really want to make me happy, Arnav?" He nodded, and she took a deep breath, "Then please don't try to stop me. I need a break, away from you." She saw him cry like a small child and she knew she could not bear to see him breaking apart. But staying back meant giving up her self-respect and her dignity. "I'll be at my parent's place until I am sure enough to let go of what happened, if that is even possible. Till then, goodbye Arnav"

Arnav felt like his feet had grown roots into the ground, and he just couldn't budge. He watched her walking out of his house, without another glance behind. His brain stopped functioning and it seemed like he had frozen. It was now loud and clear to him. She did not love him anymore, and she wasn't the one to be blamed. He pushed her away from her. How would they get over all this? Would she forgive him over the course of time? Would he forgive himself? She was close to hating him. What if, over time, her innermost feeling for him, faded away? And what if her resentment turned into hatred? Or even if, one fine day, she forgave him and came back to him, would they be able to put everything behind them and start afresh? How would they manage to be happy with each other? Did she even love him now? She had clearly told him she wasn't sure about it. He could not live without her and he was scared of losing her but what if she could not be happy with him? He was almost shattered when she spoke those words a while back. Her words told him that she was tired; she was tired of their relationship, she was tired of him.

Arnav closed his eyes and he felt as if his heart had been pierced with a stake while various thoughts began to fill his head, each thought stabbing his heart, over and over again. They were not suitable for each other, and he was being selfish by keeping her trapped with him. She was right. It was not a marriage, but a sham. She was tricked into marrying him. The first time he saw her, he approached her and had asked her to sleep with him. It was no surprise that she hated him. But overtime, her feelings did change for him. She genuinely fell in love with him. And just then, he had doubted her and treated her as if she was a piece of unwanted scrap, in spite of being pregnant with his child. He smiled sadly with tears on his cheeks at the thought of that tiny speck of life within the womb of the woman whom he hurt so badly. He was never a good son or a good husband. And now, he knew he would be a horrible father to that innocent soul. That child and Khushi deserved a much better life and he knew he could never give it to them. He would be able to provide every damn thing in the world that money could buy, but he knew he would never be able to keep them happy. And he couldn't bear to hurt either of them. They would be much happier without him in their lives. A sudden realization dawned on him and it made him weep bitterly. He needed to divorce her before her life was totally destroyed. He would set her free and would make sure to support her and his baby financially, if she would allow him. She was still young, and had a long life ahead of her. Maybe, she would find another... He stopped unable to think further.

After minutes passed, he got up and walked upstairs to the bedroom. He looked around relishing the memories of what they once shared. And then, he recalled how he treated her. He could almost see her in front of his eyes, shivering on the bathroom floor. And then, the way she had stepped out of the bathroom in horror and asked him to take her to the hospital to save their baby. He threw his hands over his face and let out a cry of anguish. He went out to the open terrace as he stared at the cloudy sky. They shouldn't have gotten married; he shouldn't have tricked her into it at all. Everything was so wrong now. But he knew he had to set it right. He had finally made a decision. He called up Aman and gave him a few instructions. Aman was shocked and refused to obey him. He was not just an employee; he was Arnav's well-wisher too. When he voiced out the same, Arnav smiled with sadness, "I know Aman. But this needs to be done. It's for the best."

Khushi reached her parent's house. Even before she entered the house, Garima questioned her as to why she was back with her luggage. She said nothing, but kept crying. "Enough Garima," Shashi reprimanded, "Let her come inside. She's our daughter and she has the right to stay here. This is her house too" Garima had frowned, wondering what everyone in the neighbourhood would say if they got to know that Khushi was back at her maternal home, instead of being at her husband's house. She only glared at Shashi, when he hugged Khushi, saying, "You have spoilt her, Shashi. You're the reason she is so hot-headed and stubborn. Every marriage has problems. That doesn't mean she comes running home. She is supposed to stay with her husband and sort out her issues. And..." "Garima" Shashi slightly raised his voice, "That is enough" She shook her head and went to the kitchen. Shashi helped Khushi with her bags and took her up to her bedroom. After helping her into bed, he ran his hand over her head, "What happened, Khushi? What is upsetting you? Did Arnav say anything?" She shook her head, "We had a huge fight, Papa. And I don't want to stay with him..." Shashi smiled, "Marriages have problems, Khushi. All relationships do. I'm not saying that you shouldn't stay here. I know you both may have been upset and you need some time away from each other. Feel free to stay as long as you wish to, and don't let anything that your mother says bother you. But there's only one thing I'd advise you, dear. Think twice before you make any decision. Relationships are like glass- it's easy to break them, and even if you fix it together, it can never go back to being what it was. Before you make a choice, think about your child and how it will be affected. In anger, you and Arnav may have said hurtful things to each other and would have decided to part. But what about your child? I know you may even be capable to bringing up your child on your own. And as long as I am alive, I will support you. But Khushi, even if a child needs the mother the most, it needs a father too."

Khushi cried bitterly. She needed some time away from Arnav, so that she was able to think straight. But what if his feelings faded away? What if he would eventually stop loving her, and would gradually forget her? She loved him, but her hurt feelings blinded that love for him. "Sleep for some time" she heard her father say, "you need some rest" She slipped under the blanket and her Papa patted her head for some time, until she felt tiredness wash over her and put her into a deep sleep. Two hours later when she woke up, she saw that she had forty seven missed calls, all from Arnav. She picked her phone to call him back, but then remembered how he treated her. She deleted her call log and placed her phone away from her. And she cried until she fell asleep again.

Three days passed by. Arnav kept sending her flowers and cards saying sorry to her. He kept calling her, every minute of the day. She was too hurt to forgive him. More importantly, she was too stubborn to let it go. Why should I forgive him? Let him stew and burn, just like how I did.Her mother kept muttering things like how she must learn to forgive and not be too stubborn, but she was too angry. She knew he hadn't really forced her to have sex with him that fateful night. She had gone to him, and asked him for it. He had just asked to be left alone. In spite of that, she had enticed him, almost begging him to take her. He had obliged, but ended up in venting out his frustrations. Yet, she felt disgusted at how he chose to leave her on the floor, as if she was a wh**e, and not his wife. Every moment she wished to forgive him and run back into his arms, she remembered how she lay on the cold, bathroom floor. She was battling her own emotions but each time she tried, she failed to convince herself that she hated him. Someone would call her a fool for loving a man who behaved so cruelly with her, but she just couldn't help it. Her entire being refused to accept that she could ever hate him.

It was then on the fourth day that she was surprised by Arnav's visit. He did not enter the compound, too embarrassed to face her parent's, because he did not know what she had told her parent's if they asked a reason for her visit. He simply waited on the road opposite to her house. She did not know since how long he had been waiting there, but saw him when she went to the balcony to dry her clothes on the strings. He looked shabby, and it took her a few seconds to recognise him. He hadn't shaved and his hair was messy. She could tell that his eyes were blood-shot; perhaps he was drinking again. Her heart broke to see him standing so lost. He looked at her and just kept looking. There was no emotion registered on his face. She went downstairs and rushed out of her house to meet him. But just before she stepped out of the gate, her mind recalled all of those hurtful memories. The emotions of love were overpowered by resentment and anger, again, and she walked up to him with new, raw anger.

"What are you doing here?" She asked him in a cold voice. He watched her face and was happy that the color of her face was back to normal. She was getting better in health. Better, without your unwanted presence in her life, the annoying voice in his head said to him. "I came to see you" he told her honestly, ignoring the voices in his head and the hatred for him in her eyes which tore his heart every second. "Why? You wanted to see if I am alive or dead? I'm very much alive, and was happy until you came here" she lied to him. The look of defeat in his eyes at her harsh words made her curse her tongue for speaking such awful things, but anger was something she just couldn't keep a lid on. "Khushi, please..." he pleaded her. "Or maybe, you felt the need to shag me?" Khushi's blood was boiling and she just couldn't stop saying anything unpleasant. The venom had already been running in her veins, and she did not realise that over time, she had become so bitter. Arnav looked at the ground in guilt for his disgusting behaviour towards her, "Khushi, not everything is about sex." "With you, it is" she answered icily, and he just chose to ignore her words. "Khushi, I care about you. And I was worried when you weren't picking my calls. I wanted to make sure that you're okay." Khushi looked away from him, "Why wouldn't I be okay? I'm absolutely fine and happy, Arnav." Arnav nodded, "I'm glad you're fine..." "Anything else?" she interrupted him and he looked up at her face. She wasn't even looking at him. He shook his head and smiled half-heartedly, "No, nothing else, Khushi." He realised that everything was over between them. She hated him so much that she did not even want to look at him. "Take care Khushi. Stay happy and God bless you" he said to her, and she looked at him in confusion. He made it seem as if he was meeting her for the last time. She knit her brows and looked at him as he put his dark sun-shades. Before he sat in his car, he looked at her for a whole minute. "Goodbye Khushi" he whispered to himself as he sat inside the car, and drove away. He kept looking at her in the rear-view mirror until she was out of sight. Khushi watched the car go away and she had an annoying feeling; as if something precious was slipping away from her fingers. He had made a decision to let her go away from him, and she had pretended to look happy without him. And just when she thought nothing worse could happen, it did.