Khushi sat in the corner of the living room on the cold marble floor. It had been three hours since Arnav had walked out of the house. She had kept trying his phone number, in hopes of reaching him, and hoping that he would hear her out. For the first few minutes, it kept ringing. After a while, the phone was switched off. Her heart sank. She felt as if he had blocked every road for her that led to him. His anger was justified. She had spoken without thinking, in a fit of anger. And her own words stung her like the poison of a deadly wasp. She could only imagine what Arnav was going through. She wanted to hold him and hug him; tell him that she never meant those words; tell him that she loved him from the bottom of her heart; tell him that there was no truth in those pictures; tell him that she loved no one but him. Bitter tears kept streaming down her cheek. Her gaze was fixed on the main door, waiting when he would come back to her. She knew he would not give her a chance to talk to him, but hopefully she could make him listen, even if he did not want to. And then, once she would tell him her side of the story, he would understand that she was just a victim to the circumstances. She did not know how she was going to do that, but presently, she only hoped for him to come back home.
Khushi, while lost in her thoughts, had almost dozed off, hugging her knees to her chest. Just then she heard the door being unlocked and she woke up with a start. She rose to her feet and ran towards the door, only to see a drunken Arnav, being supported by Aman. She looked at Arnav. He was hardly able to stand on his own. His eyes were blood-shot and he was busy mumbling something that was inaudible. Aman made him walk to the sofa and Arnav slumped into it. Aman then looked at Khushi and nodded his head in greeting, "The bar manager called me up saying that Arnav sir was too drunk to even stand up. I immediately went over, and brought him back" She nodded and thanked him in gratitude.
Just when Aman was about to leave, Arnav called out to him, "Arey Aman!" he slurred as he struggled to rise from the sofa and hug the man. Aman was taken aback when he hugged him. Then Arnav stumbled back and turned to look at Khushi. "Look who's here, Aman. It's Khushi!" he said with a tilt of his head and a wry smile. He frowned as he stepped towards her, while she looked at him with a hurtful gaze, still rooted to the ground. He placed his arm on her shoulder, and tipped her chin up with his other hand, "Have you seen such a fine woman, Aman? So charming, so beautiful?" Khushi turned her face away in disgust when she smelt alcohol in his breath, that threatened to make her revisit whatever she had eaten last. When he heard no reply from Aman, he turned his head and asked him again, repeating his question. "No Sir, I haven't" Aman said in a low voice. He was embarrassed to stand there, between the married couple, and listen to their talk. Khushi held her tears back. "Arnav, you're drunk..." Khushi said, but Arnav placed a finger on her lips, "Hush Khushi. You've spoken enough already. My turn now!" he said, still swaying and stumbling. Khushi looked at Aman with pleading eyes, who silently gestured that he was leaving. Khushi nodded in acknowledgement and thankfulness.
Cupping her face in his hands, Arnav who was unaware that Aman had left, said with a wide smile, "Look at her, Aman! Such an angelic face! So much of innocence, charm and beauty. It is for this very same angel that I fell for." Slowly, his smile faded as he placed both his hands on her shoulders, "But what did I know? That this angel had a black poisonous heart! First, this angel makes you fall madly in love with her, and once you've fallen, she rips your heart open with her claws." Khushi felt tears stinging her eyes at his words. She knew he was drunk, but was speaking his heart out. His smile completely vanished and he turned sad, "I know you're not happy with me, Khushi. Hell, no one can be happy with me. My Mom left me, my Dad was never around me; my own parents weren't happy to stay with me. How the hell could I expect anything from you?" He stepped away from her and she held his forearms when he stumbled. He swatted her hand away and looked at her, trying to blink his tears away, "I loved you, Khushi" he yelled at her, and tears streamed down her cheek. He softened his tone, "I loved the way your eyes sparkled when you spoke to me. I loved the way you held me in your arms and hugged me. I loved when you kissed me and made me feel like the world was beautiful. You were so special to me because the moment I saw you, no one else was worth thinking about, except for you" He looked up towards the heavens and laughed, "But the sad thing is that you did not love me. You were just pretending to love me. You were my f**king universe, Khushi. But for you, I was just a brute, an animal, a monster."
She stepped closer to him but he stepped away from her. "Don't" he growled and glared at her, "Don't come near me." Pausing for a moment, he yelled again, "I trusted you, Khushi. If you did not love me, why did you pretend? I could have lived with your hatred, but what did you gain by lying to me?" Gripping her shoulders roughly, he pulled her close. She screwed her eyes shut in pain, but couldn't see her pain; he was blinded by his own hurt. "I wasn't like this before I met you. I was organised, and had everything under control. And then, once you came into my life; my entire world got messed up." Giving her a gentle shove away from him, he smiled bitterly and fell on his knees. "And you..." he said, causing Khushi to gasp when she realised he was talking to their baby within her. "You... Little one... Who are you? Who are you to me? Are you even my baby? Or is your Daddy's name Karan Singhania?" Khushi looked at Arnav in horror, "What nonsense are you talking, Arnav? What do you mean by that?" Arnav looked up at her face and scowled, choosing not to respond to her. Looking back at her flat abdomen, he placed his hand over her belly as he continued, "You know, I loved your Mommy so much. Yet, she did not love me. She lied that she loved me. And then, she went to Karan" Khushi stepped away, but he held her waist and drew her closer, not allowing her to move away. "Arnav let me go" she whispered, too shocked to believe that Arnav doubted her fidelity. She gave herself to him, and in return, he doubted her loyalty towards him. How could he think that she had stooped so low to go and sleep with another man, despite being married to him? She sucked in a deep breath, unable to push him away, as he continued to talk to the child.
"I'm sorry, little one. I forced your Mommy to stay married to me. I should never have done that. In fact, I never should have gotten married to her. She would have been happy with the one she loves. I spoiled her life. I trapped her in this sham of a marriage. I hurt her. I'm so sorry. But don't you worry. I will make everything alright. I will not let anything be ruined anymore. I will let your Mommy free, and she will be able to go far away from a monster like me." Khushi felt his tears against her belly when he kissed her abdomen; she sobbed bitterly at his words. His heart had been pierced with her arrows of betrayal and hers was pierced with his painful words. "One more thing, Little one. I'll find out soon, if I'm your Daddy. If you really are mine, then I'll take care of you. I'll never let go of you. After you come into this world, you and I will go somewhere far away. Then Mommy can go to her lover. I'll love you so much that you'll never remember her. And she too will forget you and me when she has many more babies from Karan." Khushi wanted to pull away from him when he kept talking nonsense; how could he doubt her? There was no greater pain than having the father of her child doubt if the seed within her womb was his. Yet, she let him cling to her. She was broken and needed to be hugged; and even if he wasn't hugging her, she felt some sense of peace and satisfaction that he was talking to their unborn, while holding onto her.
Suddenly he fell silent and Khushi looked down at him to see what made him stop talking. He pulled away from her, as if he had burnt his hands by touching her, and Khushi felt herself being pushed away from him. Staring at her belly, as if looking at the life growing within her, he whispered, "But, what if you're not my baby? What if Karan is your Daddy? Then, you and Mommy will leave me, right? You, your Mommy and your Daddy will be together, as one happy family. And I will be alone, again, like I always was!" He wiped his tears with the back of his hand and began to laugh hysterically, as if it was the funniest thing to say. Sadly, he wasn't amused, and neither was she. Looking up at Khushi, he said with a loud laugh, "Isn't it funny? I've been alone all my life. And even now, I'll be left alone!" He laughed as he recalled her spiteful words and the pictures. She not only lied to him, but also had him believe that another man's child was his own. She knew how much he looked forward to having a family. She knew how happy that news made him. But now, he would never have a family of his own. He laughed louder as he thought about the child. He had already been in love with the baby, so much that he would do anything for the child. But now that there was a possibility that the child belonged to Karan, he wanted the baby to be happy with its parents. He would not bother them anymore.
He laughed louder and louder, and Khushi only stared at him with pain in her eyes as he said to her, "Laugh, Khushi. Laugh with me. Laugh at my pain. This is what you wanted to see, right? Arnav Singh Raizada in ruins? Well, guess what? You won. Arnav Singh Raizada is not only ruined; Arnav Singh Raizada is dead! He had come to life when you said that you loved him, but now, he's dead again. Cold, icy and dead. And you know who killed him?" He pointed his finger to her, "You!" Khushi felt her breath leave her body as he accused her. Her balance disintegrated and she leaned against the cold wall for support. "You killed him, Khushi! You murdered Arnav Singh Raizada ruthlessly. You cut his chest open and kept stabbing and stabbing and stabbing, till his heart stopped beating and was into tiny little pieces. And now," he raised both his arms to his shoulder level, ", only this cold, heartless, lifeless body stays behind. Come on, let's celebrate Khushi. Let's celebrate your freedom and my death!"
Khushi felt the ground slipping away beneath her feet. "Arnav, how can you say such a thing? You have no right to insult me this way. I have always been loyal to you! There has been no one, but you. You need to hear me out, just once. Pease, I beg of you. Please don't treat me like a traitor. I haven't cheated you, Arnav." she screamed at him. He looked up at her and struggled for about a minute to stand on his feet. He looked at her with a gaze full of hatred, "Haven't cheated? Loyal? How? By putting your mouth against his?" Khushi felt as if she was buried in a cold block of ice and she felt all her senses turn numb. He dug his fingers into her arms and again, she winced in pain, "Tell me, Khushi. Did you enjoy kissing him? Where did he touch you while his tongue was in your mouth?" Khushi closed her eyes in disgust as he continued to yell, "Where did he take you after that? Did you let him shag you in the back of his car? Or did he take you to a nearby hotel? Or maybe you went to his house to warm his bed? Even worse, did you bring him into my house and let him f**k you in my bed? Come on, answer me. How was he? Was he better than me? Were you asking him to screw you faster? Were you begging him to shag you harder like how you used to beg me? Did you enjoy him? Did you moan out his name? Did you tell him that you liked it? Answer me, you cold-blooded wh**e!"
Khushi, who kept struggling out of his grip, fell limp when she heard his words. "A wh**e? Is that what I am, Arnav?" she whispered to him. He smiled gingerly, "You're even worse. You're a woman who married me, had sex with me and then went to have sex with him, behind my back. At least, a wh**e isn't committed. Was it so easy for you to jump out of my bed and get into his? Whose child are you carrying? Do you even know? Or is there any third man, who I do not know about, yet? Tell me, Khushi. How many men have you f**ked so far? How many men have you f**ked, at a time?" That did it. Khushi pulled away from him and pushed him with all her might. Next, she slapped his cheek hard.
Arnav held his palm against his cheek that stung because of her hard slap. "Enough Arnav" she breathed harshly, "You've said enough and I've heard enough. Speaking such filth is unacceptable to me. I had thought that once our mind was calm enough to listen to what I have to say, I would explain myself to you and tell you under what circumstances I spoke such words. But not anymore. I will not explain myself to you. You do not deserve it. You are such a bas***d to say such words, and I cannot accept a relationship where doubt prevails. Your drunkenness just allowed you speak your mind out. And now that I know what you really think of me, I don't think you are worth any explanation. You know what? You're absolutely right. Let's celebrate my freedom. I too am tired of it all. I am not a bloody animal; I am your wife; I am the mother of your child and I deserve to be treated with respect. But you would not understand it. And I will not try to make you understand too. I will leave tomorrow morning and you will not see my face ever." Placing her hand over her belly, she said, "This is your child, Arnav. Because you're the only man I have been with. But obviously you won't believe me. And I won't waste my time proving it to you. I will walk out of here and you will never hear about me or my baby again. I will see that I find some job to feed myself and my baby. You needn't bother about us. Not now, not ever." Turning away from him, she walked to the stairs. Just before she was about to go up to the room, she tilted her head to look at him, "I know I had once said that I'd rather kill the baby than making you a father. I now know that it is not possible. I love this baby too much and will do anything to protect my child. But you will think that I am lying to you, and I know it. So I'm not going to explain myself either. Anyway, what can I expect from a man who calls his wife a wh**e? Thank you, Arnav, I now know my place in your life; I know where I stand" Saying this, she walked up the stairs and shut the door behind her. "Get lost, you bitch" he yelled at her as she closed the door.
Khushi leaned against the door and cried bitterly when she heard him shout. The tears she was holding back came forth like an open dam and she fell on her knees as she cried. What followed his harsh voice was the crashing of several glassware and porcelain. With each crash, she felt her heart breaking into smaller pieces. He doubted her love for him, her faithfulness towards him. It was the worst that he said to her. She released a wretched sob as she recalled his painful words. Placing her hands on her belly, she whispered, "I'm sorry you had to hear it all. Daddy did not mean it. He was too angry with Mommy and that's why he said it all. Daddy too loves you a lot, just like Mommy loves you. You're not unwanted; you're not hated; you're loved, a lot." She then curled up into a ball and cried; and she kept crying until she passed out.
Arnav fell on his knees, with his face buried in his hands. His life was back to being empty and desolate. The one woman he loved, cheated on him. She broke his heart and his trust. At this moment, he did not care even if she screamed out from the highest tower, proclaiming her so-called love for him. Neither did he care how sorry she was for his words. All he knew was that she hurt him. She scraped his wounds and left him sore. Each words were like daggers and each of them pierced through him. He was dull and lifeless now, and his eyes were filled with despair and desolation. Their fairy tale came to an abrupt end on an ugly note. He closed his eyes and leaned against the wall, "I miss you, Ma" he said, just as he had said at his mother's funeral, when he was an eight-year old boy. He wanted to lay his head in his mother's lap and have her hand run through his hair. Just like earlier times. It wasn't possible though. He did not have anyone by his side then, nor did he have anyone now. He desperately needed some air to breathe, for every moment choked him and made him suffocate. He was drowning into dark waters and the only person who had promised to toss him a rope and pull him out of darkness, left his hand for another. Slowly, he felt darkness engulf him and soon, he was knocked out of his senses.
Arnav woke up the next morning, with a heavy head, only to find himself lying on the floor of the living room. His head throbbed painfully due to the hangover. He rubbed his aching temple with his fingers, hoping that the pain would fade away. Instead, it seemed to increase. Leaning against the wall, he rested his head and tried to relax himself. Just then, he heard the click-clack of heels down the stairs. He opened his eyes to see Khushi descending down to the living room. She dragged two huge suitcases along with her. Arnav frowned as to where she was off to. He then recalled the entire evening of the previous day, and with each second, anger rose in him.
Khushi looked at him and at the same time, he looked at her too. She did not say a word, but her heart contracted with pain when she saw him. He put on a brave face with a harsh look, yet she could see through it; he looked utterly defeated and broken. However, she couldn't stay with him. He had said too much against her and her baby; and each time she would look at him, those words would sting her. And for him, her presence in the house would be hurtful as rubbing salt on bleeding wounds. "Your keys" She said and placed the house keys on the dining table, and struggled to lift her bag. He walked to her in quick strides and moved the bags till the main door. She looked at him, "I'm going to my Parent's..." "I don't care..." he said, cutting her sentence. She felt tears threatening to fall off her eyes at his attitude. She picked the bag and stepped out of the house. "Khushi..." she heard her name being called and turned around in hope that he would stop her. He looked at her with a blank expression, "Ask the driver to drop you" She felt her ire rising. "No, thank you, Arnav Singh Raizada. I don't need any favours from you... I can manage on my own; I need to get used to it." Arnav winced when he heard the tone of regret in her voice. She turned her heel to walk away, but stopped when he spoke, "Of course, you can manage. And if you can't, your lover boy is always ready, waiting for you to run into his arms. You know what? Go, just f**k off." he said to her.
She turned to look at him and when she saw his eyes, she felt her hands turn cold. She felt herself being imbalanced when she saw regret. He regretted their marriage; he regretted knowing her; he regretted making love to her. There was no love in those eyes anymore. She saw nothing but emptiness. He stood watching her with his cold, dead eyes, as she kept staring at him. It was one moment of enlightenment, which made them both realise that even if they loved each other, they couldn't continue to stay under one roof. It wasn't possible for him to look at her without any doubt rising in his mind. And she knew that her words would always bite him whenever she would go in front of him. Both said nothing more, but just kept staring at each other. "I'll send the divorce papers to you through my lawyer." He said in a tone which was surprisingly calm and closed the door shut.
Khushi looked at the closed door, trying to absorb his words to her. She looked to her left and then to her right, and thankfully, no one was around. Bitter tears drained down her face. "Divorce paper? Was it so easy for you to give up, Arnav? Did our relationship mean nothing to you? How can you give up so easily? I left home, thinking that you would follow me. I did not know that you'd let me walk away so easily" She wiped her tears and dragged her bags towards the road to call out to a taxi.
Arnav let out a raging scream as he picked another vase and broke it. It felt as though his world shattered into pieces. He fell to the floor and ran his hands through his hair in despair. "Why Khushi, why?" Never in his life did he fathom that love could be so painful. Unfortunately, according to him, it was one-sided and that's what made it worse. His anger and hatred blinded him, and he couldn't see her love for him. All he saw and believed were those damn photographs and the video. He then thought about the baby. What if the child inside her belonged to him? A sudden wave of possessiveness overpowered him. He stormed out of the house and rushed outside, only to see her near the main gates.
"Close the gates" Arnav said in a loud voice and the security immediately obeyed their Master's orders. Khushi turned back to see Arnav walking towards her. A tiny speck of hope rose within her. He did not give up on her. He still loved her. He walked to where she was rooted to the ground. He quietly picked the bags and walked inside the house. She stared at him, walking away, with her bags. Without any option, she followed him. She stepped back into the house and saw him waiting near the door. The minute she went inside, he locked the door.
Turning towards her, he crossed his arms at his chest. She opened her mouth to say something, but he raised his hand. "Khushi Gupta" he said, using her maiden name on purpose. The tiny speck of hope that grew in her heart began to fade away. "You will stay here, in this house, until I confirm whether the child within you is really mine. If it isn't, you're free to walk away" Khushi gaped at him in pure shock when her mind registered his words. He called her back, only for the sake of the baby! Then, she felt anger. "How dare you, Arnav! I will not stay here for a minute. I'm a wh**e, right? And a wh**e's place is at a brothel, not in a home." She turned around to pick her bags which were placed near the door, but stopped when she heard her name being called out again. "Khushi Gupta, you may have forgotten that I still have the documents that you signed; in which you've given up all rights to stay at any other place, apart from my house, after being married to me. Also, there is one particular clause which states that I can drag you to court if any terms and conditions stated in the document are breached. If you walk away now, I will make sure I find you and drag you to court. And you know that I will not hesitate to do that, especially, given the possibility that you're carrying my baby. If I were to take you to court, I would also claim custody for my child, and I can easily win because I am financially sound. And it won't take long for me to find another wife, willing to be a mother to the child, thus providing a complete family to my baby. The choice is yours. You will stay here until I get the DNA test done. Once the result is out and if it is proved that the child isn't mine, you can go wherever you wish to. Brothel or hell, I don't care. But if the child is mine, you aren't going anywhere." Khushi looked at her husband. Who was this man? Gone was her Arnav who loved her to madness. The man in front of her was a cold, ruthless stranger proposing a business deal to her. He ordered her and gave her no freedom of choice. Stay or get dragged to court. She could not lose her baby. Moreover, this was the only way she could stay close to Arnav and try convincing him through her deeds that she was and will always love no one else but him. "I'll stay" she whispered.
Arnav nodded arrogantly. "I thought so." When he saw her pick her suitcase, he spoke, "I haven't finished talking yet, Khushi Gupta" Khushi dropped the bag back on the floor on listening to her name; she had gotten used to her husband's surname, and now her own maiden name sounded alien to her ears. Also, she now knew why all his employees feared him. He was cold and menacing, and at present, she was just like another employee to him. She literally flinched when his voice boomed in the huge living room. Arnav looked at her, and for a moment, his heart ached when he saw her in pain. This was the woman whom he loved to madness; the woman for whom he could bring the stars and moon down. "A brute, an animal, a monster" her words rang in his head and he hardened his expression. This was the woman who cheated him and lied to him. A bloody liar, a cheat and a promiscuous bitch. "You will stay in the guest room, downstairs. Seeta will move all your things to your room. You'll be informed about the appointment at the clinic too" He said and turned away to go to his room. Khushi stood, watching his retreating back. She had been asked to leave their bedroom; the room where they spent so many wonderful memories together. Her soul felt as if it had been ripped into two. He spoke to her as if he was talking to a random stranger. She doubted if she could take so much of coldness from him. A part of her wanted to pick her bags and leave. To hell with being dragged to court. But then, she thought of her baby growing inside her. She couldn't be selfish. What would she answer her baby when it would ask her about its father? Her hand went up to her belly, "I stayed back only because of you. I know you need Daddy as much as you need me. I may be angry with him for what he said, but I can never stop loving him. And I know that he loves us both too. He's just too stubborn to admit it. But we'll make sure he comes around, right?" She knew her baby agreed with her. She sighed heavily as she picked up her bag and moved to her new room, the one which was the farthest away from Arnav Singh Raizada.
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
Anupamaa
193