A long, pitiful wail roused Jeevika from her sleep. She yawned sleepily and moved Viren's arm from where he had wrapped it around her waist, trying not to wake him up. He stirred, woken by the movement and Mansi's cry and told her drowsily, "You sleep, I'll take care of her."
"Nahi, Virenji, you have an important case tomorrow, you sleep," she replied, rising from the bed. She changed Mansi's diaper and bottle-fed her some milk, murmuring words of endearment as she sat on the bed next to Viren.
"I'll feed her," he tried persuading her again, but Jeevika shook her head.
"Don't worry, go to sleep."
"How can I sleep when meri biwi aur beti are awake?" he smiled at her, his voice husky from slumber. The vision of his wife, hair tousled from sleep, eyelids heavy, yet awake while she nursed their baby was a beautiful sight.
"Should I sing you a good night song, also?" she teased him.
"Forget a good night song, how about a good night kiss?" he definitely wasn't feeling sleepy any longer.
"Virenji! How can you be so shameless in front of your daughter?" Jeevika reprimanded him, blushingly.
"Kya? Not even one good night kiss? Fine, I'll give one to Mansi, not you," he placed a gentle kiss on his daughter's forehead, "Tumhari mummy doesn't love your papa anymore," he told Mansi, "Now, that you have come along, she doesn't have any time for me."
Jeevika shook her head at him, smiling, "Shh, she's gone to sleep now," she placed Mansi back in her crib, tucking the bedcovers around her lovingly.
She approached the bed and Viren caught her hand, pulling her down and wrapping his arms around her, "Now, I can sleep peacefully." Jeevika pressed her face into his chest, shrouded in his warmth and it wasn't long before she fell asleep also.
Viren headed to the hospital during his lunch break. He wasn't going to the doctor who had previously treated Jeevika; he couldn't help but remember that she had told them Jeevika would be unable to conceive naturally, when, against all odds, she was now pregnant. He'd heard of this doctor through a friend; Dr. Rakesh Chakravarthy. Apparently he was well-renowned over the globe and had saved hundreds of people with his quick intelligence and effective treatments. He waited in the clinic impatiently, his foot tapping against the floor. His phone buzzed. It was from Jeevika.
How did the case go?
He smiled; she always thought of him, even when he wasn't there.
It's going great. I think we'll win for sure! he texted back.
Mansi and I prayed for you this morning. You will win J
Thank you, darling. I'm missing you both. He really was.
Come home soon.
You're missing me? He grinned.
Your daughter is missing you.
Liar.
A lawyer's biwi never lies.
He chuckled. "Mr. Viren Vadhera?" the receptionist called him.
He got up, "Yes, that's me."
"Dr. Chakravarthy is waiting for you," she said.
He texted Jeevika back before leaving, I love you, both.
Half a second later, he received her text, We love you, too.
He entered the doctor's office and shook hands, exchanging pleasantries with the doctor, before handing him Jeevika's file. "My wife...had an abortion, the previous year. We had been told that she would be unable to conceive naturally after it; that her uterus lining was too weak. But, a few days ago we found out she's pregnant. So, I wanted to know if there would be any complications during this pregnancy..."
Dr. Chakravarthy looked through the file quickly and then faced Viren in his chair, "Mr. Vadhera, the chance of complications is small, but yes, there is a problem that may occur. It's called laceration of the cervix. Sometimes, after an abortion, the cervix can be weakened and it can affect the pregnancy. It happens to 1/20 women after an abortion. The result of the weakened cervix can be a premature delivery...or a miscarriage."
Viren's heart dropped in his chest; his mind racing with the news. After, after all this trouble...could it be true? Could they lose their baby?
The doctor continued, "However, there is no need to worry as yet. I will have to do an ultrasound to see whether her cervix is fine or weak. And even if it is weak, then there are treatments available and with the treatment, both the mother and the baby will be safe. Bring her in, in a week or so, and we'll check her cervix." He put a hand on Viren's shoulder reassuringly, "Most likely, there will be nothing wrong, Mr. Vadhera. It's good you came to me now. Many women have not realized they have a weak cervix until after 2-3 miscarriages. But, coming to me now may save you a lot of unnecessary pain and worry."
Viren exited the hospital in a daze, his mind clouded by fear and anxiety. He was so afraid something would go wrong...so, so afraid. And he had no idea how he would inform Jeevika of this news. How would she react? And the treatment? He did not want to subject his wife to more physical pain. He couldn't bear to see her in physical or emotion distress; the loss of another baby would utterly destroy her.
Jeevika changed Mansi's diaper, talking to her in their bedroom, "Mansi, you know, your Papa is going to come home early today? Just for you! He said, he misses you very, very much and loves you a lot."
Mansi gurgled softly.
"Haan, baby," Jeevika smiled widely, lifting her up, "You have the best Papa in the whole, wide world. Lucky girl! Meri khoobsurat beti, you know, you look just like your Papa? Same mouth, same nose, same chin, even your ears are the same!"
"But, your eyes are exactly like your Mummy's," Viren's voice came from the open doorway. He smiled at them, taking Mansi in his arms, yet Jeevika could sense there was some discontent, some sadness in his smile.
"Was the case really okay?" she asked him, her hand resting on his arm.
"Haan, bilkul," he said and she believed him. But, then, why was there such restlessness in his eyes, such solemnity?
"Virenji, is there anything wrong?" she queried.
Viren kissed Mansi's forehead before laying her back in her crib. He, then took Jeevika's hand and led her to sit on the bed. "Virenji..." she looked at him, confused and slightly anxious as well.
"Jeevika, today I went to go see this doctor. He is a famous, very intelligent doctor who has dealt with many different cases. I took your file to him because I wanted to make sure, wanted to have no doubts whatsoever, that nothing would go wrong during your pregnancy."
Jeevika's heart sped at an unnatural pace and she asked in a trembling voice, "Aur? What did the doctor say? Will the baby be okay? Will anything happen?"
"Jeevika, Jeevika," he soothed her, cupping her face in his hands and brushing his thumbs across her cheeks. She held onto his wrists as though he was her lifeline. "The doctor said that there may, you understand? There might be a problem, but the chances are very small. He said that after having an abortion, there is a possibility your cervix might be weak. But, even if it is weak, there is a treatment for it, and you and our baby will be perfectly fine, okay? We're gonna go for an ultrasound next week and check, but I'm sure, I'm certain everything will be fine."
A tear rolled down her cheek and he brushed it away tenderly, tears gathering in his own eyes, "Jeevika, please don't cry. We'll be fine," he gathered her in his arms, repeating, "We'll be fine," pressing his mouth to the top of her head, stroking her hair. He wasn't sure if he was trying to convince his wife...or himself.
It was late in the night, yet neither could sleep, both trying to find solace in each other's arms. The tears had stopped, yet the fears remained, the grief would not leave them. Viren's hand caressed Jeevika's stomach. There was life there...their child was there...their sweet, wonderful baby. If anything happened to it, they weren't sure they would ever recover from the unspeakable loss. "Let's not tell the family yet," he whispered to her, "Let's wait until we get the results from the ultrasound. If everything is fine, then we won't have to tell them anything, but if...if, there is a problem, then we will tell them, okay?"
Jeevika nodded into his neck, "Okay, Virenji."
"And Jeevika? I love you. I love you, so, so much. No matter what comes, we will face it together, alright? You, me and Mansi."
"I love you too, Virenji," she whispered, her voice sounding so fragile, so small, yet there was a strength behind her words.
He held her tightly to him. Whatever came, they would face it together.
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