Arhi FF PMIJ Thread 4- Thd 5 link page 1 -8/4 - Page 61

Originally posted by: harith25

You think this reflects a serial .. then I guess I am just quiet offended about it..😆

I'm sorry Di. I didn't mean to offend you. I said that because, the message ocnveyed was same - a woman has to be mother earth in patience and remain so till your husband gets bored with his ways and turn towards you lovingly.

I'm not saying it is a wrong message entirely, but in one sense it is wrong. Because in such a way men gets to do whatever they want and at the end gets accepted too for what they are. But that's not the case with women. Take Shalini here for example. She was like Shyam, but Shyam gets to turn good and have a wife and child but Shalini remains the evil witch. Why? Isn't that unfair that when men are bad there are all chances for them to turn good and wives should wait lifelong for that and not vice versa?

If La had shown ego and gone away like NK, would their marriage work? NO. Nk won't wait so patiently for that long, I'm not saying about NK as such but men like that, and even NK's family and La's family will ensure that they get divorced because La is a girl with no family values. NK might even get married again. But when NK is doing all this, LA is expected to wait for him to finally give a chance to their relationship.

I was disheartened by the gender politics here Di, nothing else.

I disagree and agree to this.. Madhumati's case she was forced to live in the scum as she had two kids to foster. Anjali's case - She made sure her daughter is protected.. and tell me something what assurance she would have to get someone good and perfect like Akash to Anjali? I had reasoned that Anjali was going to the level of suicide if Shyam hadnt married her owing to the reason that she blames herself and feels insecured and inferior to others. I would not entirely blame anyone because she had made herself clear to get all the thorns in her daughters life cleared which was assured by daadi and Arnav. Had she got anyone in her life she wouldnt have to suffer too.. She didnt push her daughter into hell.. She was following her husband's life he was being pushed from all sides to get himself out of the scum. I felt an over powering security and protection in a mother who sought to deal it from outside without affecting her daughter's happiness stood high than the idiotic ego which a girl had to portray when her life was shaky enough.

No Di. I did not say Madhumati is wrong. Read my words once more. Yes, I said it was not the right thing, but I also said that I understood her reasons for letting her get married to Raizada family. As you said a mother alone can understand that step to safegaurd her daughter. I know, if any other guy married Anjali it would be for money. But Shyam married her for that too, still his family was good, so there I don't blame Madhumati. I just said that, she should not have kept Anjali in the dark about it. It is Anjali's life and her marriage, so she should know what awaits her. Ok maybe if she didn't want to tamper Anjali's happiness, she could have at least conveyed this to her after marriage. Anjali was needed to be prepared. Anjali would know it one day for sure. So instead of finding her faith break in him, she should have been made to know about this.

I am portraying Anjali as bipolar, confusing character here because she is waht the character is .. as I said earlier in some other FF you cant expect everyone to be PERFECT in life. If she is wrong thats what her character is. and regarding her giving a chance to Shyam doesn't mean she is running into his arms the next second forgetting all those he had done to her.. You just dont jump into conclusions on that matter.

Ok, here I was wrong. I did get angry at her sudden changes. Yes maybe I expected a bit more perfection from her here. I was wrong, so I take back that.

NK - La-- NK's character is some sort of male chauvinist yet his heart is not a rock to stomp away his wife and love. He was restraining himself from her and he too is not in a good clear mind. So he chose to ignore her while La is sincerely making up for it as her side of love is bit strong and courageous while he is not ready to confront it as he lacks the guts.

That's it. That's what I'm talking about. He can do whatever he wants and like a pativratha wife La has to wait on him. After all she is a modern day girl unlike others, including Kushi. And she is behaving like this was disappointing.

More than Arnav and Kushi, I was always moved by them and La mainly. I had a lot of expectations from La. I am not saying I expected a divorce, but won't lie I did wish for it. I wanted NK to see light but also pay for his mistakes. La chose modelling and when NK tried to warn her she didn't take heed. She got a small punishment for it, it was not much yet she realized her mistake and corrected it. But NK? He will now change and start loving his life and behave as if he was never ever egoistic. That hurts Di. Why does women always suffer and endure and give happiness while men enjoy, have fun and take happiness? Why are we just givers of happiness ?Why can't both men and women be givers and takers of happiness? Why can't this story have a different message from what serials give?

Finally My characters are not all perfect and I don't intend to make them so perfect as I show in FYF.. they have flaws as natural as in life and they will improve by time only. and regarding leaving the partner fighting for rights arguing for the dominance, I have seen many couples fighting and separating which is normal in this era. I always have felt sorry for them when they hadnt considered one last chance to sit and talk their flaws and faults try to find a middle ground between them. When you send a court notice blaming each other you will have to feel insulted for the time you spend together in life.. You regret after you have seriously spent some private moments which were privy only to you comes out in public as in means of an interrogation or questioning in the court.. Instead of spending years and years on the court judgement one hour talk would have saved the precious time of your life.

I agree here. But again except for Anjali's case, I was not talking about perfection of characters. I have explained all that already.

Yes, fight, court case etc are the last resolve. I'm not advocating for it. But lying down and taking all shit from men just because one happens to be their wife is not acceptable to me. I'm not saying they should be Rani Lakshmi Bhai or something. But still like you said, NK-La never tried to sit down and talk, La tried but NK wasn't ready.

So that's it. I felt let down by the attitude the story took, not the perfection factor. Please understand that.😭

Rest all as u perceive.. Mine is different that's all i can say 😊

Yea, I know. That's the thing here. I just wanted/ expected a new message from the story than the age old message which works only in favor of men. I feel cheated when writers or filmmakers do their wok in such a way because they are being unjust to women there. And here you are a female author, yet! That is why I said I felt let down and completely disappointed etc...