The First Five Times - Five: Pg 21

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bushrayou

@bushrayou

Voyager

Posted: 12 years ago

#201

once again awesome concept. you took the most mundane Five scenes and changed them into something so much more!

always a fan!

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--BumbleBee--

@--BumbleBee--

Inactive

Posted: 12 years ago

#202

I loved loved LOVED it.

Beautifully penned.

The way you have described all the scenes with the emotions.. awesome work.

One-

" once he reclaimed what was rightfully his. "

"But still he felt restless... he felt... incomplete."

They were so apt. Loved these the best.

Two-

"He briefly contemplated following the girl and sourcing the supplier of such soft cotton but brushed the thought aside." -👏

"He had no reason to believe in God but if there was one the only one wish Arnav would even consider making was for his sister's well-being."

''prayed for her sister, prayed that she would find true happiness with a truly worthy partner.''

Love how you have brought out what they are like, really. Underneath it all..

Three-

"With her abysmal driving skills she was bound to get into an accident someday. Thankfully there were over 12,000 other people in Delhi for her to run into and hopefully his car would be safe." - LOL. Can you be any further from the truth, ASR?

Khushi wanting to yell at him, but stopping cos she has to return to Buaji's.

Four-

"For all the gushing these girls did about wanting to break into the fashion industry they all seemed to dress the same; no individuality and no personal style."

Loved the reference to personal style.

Khushi thanking Devi Maiyya. Dropping the envelope.

The small things that make them whole. His pride, individuality. Her faith, individuality.

Five-

ASR thinking over Anjali's words.- Beautiful. Love how you have penned his thoughts.

A man who would know the value of small gestures- This is so innately Khushi.

I love the way you write.

Thanks for the PM..

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Polkadots78

@Polkadots78

Inactive

Posted: 12 years ago

#203

Ah! I am not really disappointed that they did not meet..I am just wondering what would it all have come to if they had met without the DM's explicit intervention ..in part 6, may be..I am not asking you for part 6...but I am just wondering 😃

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AllSmiles86

@AllSmiles86

Navigator

Posted: 12 years ago

#204

I love the dose of reality that you have ensnared through this story. SP and 4 Lions will hate you for doing this but I love it. You can never regret what you don't have or didn't do!

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..SankiMedhz..

@..SankiMedhz..

Sparkler

+ 5

Posted: 12 years ago

#205

Such a fitting end!! They didn't meet here as well..and I'm glad they didn't😆

Great writing!!👏

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amritab

@amritab

Navigator

Posted: 12 years ago

#206

This is a great concept - raises all sorts of questions about fate and destiny and the whole "we were meant to be" idea. Khushi and Arnav could spend the rest of their lives perfectly happy with other people, right? Shyam might have met Khushi on one of his many trips to Lucknow and married her, with no one in her family being the wiser. That sort of thing, that sort of cheating happens quite often in the real world. So my question to you is - do you believe in the concept of "meant to be" - that there is one person out there that you are supposed to be with and whom all of the fates will align to have you meet?

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kiddy-kavya

@kiddy-kavya

Navigator

Posted: 12 years ago

#207

Wow!

Beautifully written.

Brilliant work.

I esp loved the ending message.😊

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ShiningStar18

@ShiningStar18

Rocker

Posted: 12 years ago

#208

Absolutely lovely work!

Loved the concept and how you portrayed it.

The ending was just too good. Not all people are meant to meet.

You just displayed an amazing perspective 😳

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varshini karthik

@.vrshn.

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 12 years ago

#209

You're just such an amazing writer! Everyone think of that one thing--> what would happen if we just cross our soul mate or travel in the same bus as him without even realizing that he is the one? Are there are signal's and isharas that we miss? Or What if we just miss him? Does all the force work together in bringing you two together? just like they show in these serials?!

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medha

@medha16

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

#210

these short slices r simple,to the point n so beautiful!

it effectively describes what goes thru ones mind in mundane situation n helps to unearth the psyche of the characters on their reactions to different situations!

lovely idea!!!