PART 18
HER beautiful hair, soft, silky, incredibly sensual…the feel of it, the feel of her, in his arms, had started this, propelling him down a path he hadn't meant to take yet, and certainly not with the frenzied need that had driven his every action. He had to start thinking now, seize advantage of the knowledge that the need had been mutual.
She was clasping him tightly to her. Was it reaction to the physical upheaval of their togetherness, or a desire to hold onto him? He had to move, pull away himself from her before she became too conscious of it, too conscious of what she had allowed to happen, regretting it, spurning him as he'd once spurned her.
He slowly, straightened, and tried to move. From his movement, Geet stirred slightly still clinging on to him, her breath was even…He patted her cheeks lightly and called softly… 'Geeet'. No response. He tilted to look down, to find her, sleeping in his shoulder… Maan kept on looking at her for few moments, to her tearstained face. Holding her… and closed his eyes, overcome by the quiet peace, he was so content to hold her so. He will have her as his bride, his life is meant to be with her and his son, and he won't settle for anything less than all of her: mind, body and heart…
He kissed softly in her forehead… scooped her off the feet, and carried her out of the kitchen, down the central hallway, into her bedroom at the front of the house. His chest was heaving... but there was not one falter in the long, strong strides… She was still in the state of sleep, when he put her down, and removed her hands which was around his neck and tucked the comforter loosely around her slim frame.
It was twilight outside, almost dark in the bedroom, though Maan could see Geet clearly enough, see the strained look on her. Her forehead creased slightly and Maan, caressed her face…
The kiss and their physical intimacy had been too, too fast. He hadn't meant to do it her, he wanted to win back her trust first. But, her fear of him had been too intolerable, a barrier he'd had to break, though he'd lost sight of that aim as her tension had collapsed into tears. Holding her in his arms again—impossible not to remember how it had once been with her, stirring the urge to make her remember, too.
Show her, kiss her… He wanted to feel that soft skin of hers, against him… He hadn't anticipated the fierce response.
Given Geet's hostility—justified hostility—what was behind her burst of passion?
He couldn't believe it was a raging desire for him. Though there was no doubting, she loves him more than, he will ever know.. That certainly hadn't changed. But, trust? How will they build a life, if she do not trust him…
Only way to reach her is Daksh. If she is ever going to forgive him, or trust him, it can only be done, proving a good father, in that way, he can win back his Geet… a life with her and his son…. A life, which they, always dreamed of….
Besides, it would be better for Daksh to have the love and care of both parents, in his life. And it would prove his own commitment to fatherhood to Geet, removing her fear of a transient and possibly damaging dalliance with his son. So, best that he speak soon to Geet. If possible, tomorrow… Once again, giving her a good night kiss, he moved to the central hall and settled deeper into the couch, knowing another sleepless night stretched before him.
*****************************
Around 3 O'clock in the morning, Geet woke up. She was confused, how she ended up in bed. Then, the series of interminable scenes, that happened last night, unfolded before her eyes. She clutched her dupatta tightly and closed her eyes…. 'Oh god, Maan… Did it all happened really… or It was just another series of night mares. No, but he was here… sooo, Oh no! Babaaji…What have I done… How could I get carried away… How could I?'. She cursed herself for her weakness… 'But, Maan? Where is he? Did he left already?'
Her bare feet were silent as she made her way to kitchen to get some water. Yawning, she walked to the dim central hall and to the kitchen. She took a glass of cold water, standing against the kitchen counter, started sipping it, to steady her nerves.
Looking at the clock, Geet realized that it was only a little past three. But, she knew, sleep is a faraway dream. The gentle glow of the moonlight seeping in throught the window was soothing, yet mocking, as it was a constant reminder, that the night still wasn't over. She closed her eyes, hoping to calm her down, but the feeling that something is amiss, kept nagging her. 'Better, I will have a check on Daksh'. She made her way to Daksh's room. Suddenly, she saw a glint of light reflecting from metal, near couch, as she realized it is a watch, Geet felt a cold stab of fear in the pit of her stomach. She slowly moved toward the seating area.
Maan woke up with a sudden jerk, and glanced around to see the source of sound, he saw Geet standing near the couch, bewildered. He instantly get to his feet. His face showed surprise. The glass has crashed down on the floor.
'Geet what happened? Are you alright?'.
The breath ripped at her lungs as her chest refused to co-operate – her adrenaline was so strong that she couldn't breathe properly.
'Maan…'. That is all she could say. Maan realized he is the reason for her shock.
'Geet, woh, I couldn't find the spare key, to lock and go. So, I just…'
Geet was partially hoping, that, it was all a part of her dream… But, standing in front of Maan Singh Khurana, the realization dawned, what she dreaded for, has happened… She gave away herself, again to this man. No! Things has to be cleared, before Maan, takes it seriously. She felt a pang of guilt, as she was equally responsible this time, for the such a situation…
'Its okay'. Her voice was emotionless. Sharp like a cold steel.
Maan looked at her, startled. He was expecting this… He knew, Geet will regret their intimacy. It was just an emotional explosion. Nothing more. Still, it hurt him, beyond words….
Uhh Geet… Do you… I mean… Can I get some coffee, or something?' He intended to speak something, and blurted our something else. 'By the time, I will remove this glass'.
'Sure. No I will clean it'. Maan helped her, while she removed the glass particles from the carpet and floor. He scanned the whole area once again to make sure, no pieces are there, as Daksh runs around in bare feet, as well as Geet.
She returned to the main part of kitchen counter and flicked on a set of under-the-cabinet lights. Maan stood watching her, from the family room. Its an open kitchen, only divided by a granite counter, which can be used as a break fast table as well, from family room. She took out a can of coffee and began spooning grounds into the coffee maker. She glanced his way. He was still standing right where she had left him.
'Sit down Maan'. She said in the way a woman might speak to a not-too-bright child – gently, but with firmness.
He felt no irritation, that she spoke to him as if he were a child, only a kind of ironic amusement. He did as she instructed, going around the section of counter that jutted out between the breakfast table and the sink, sliding onto a stool. He watched her as she filled the carafe and poured its contents into the reservoir. She pushed the button to start the brewing cycle, then put the coffee can back in the cupboard. 'It will be ready in just few minutes'.
He shrugged, listening to the gurgling sound of the coffeemaker, thinking that it was a reassuring sound. Soothing. The kind of sound that seemed to say all was right with the world.
Whether it really was right or not.
'Maan' She came and leaned on the other side of the counter, palms on the black-colored granite tiles, looking in a dilemma. The lights under the cabinet made her hair shine and put a glow on those cheeks…
'Umm... woh… actually… what ever happened between us in the evening… I mean…' She was dying of embarrassment, for her own actions… To avoid his eyes, she started fiddling her dupatta. She didn't knew, how to continue further… and Maan seemed too silent and calm, more than ever…
He didn't respond to that, kept on looking her… He knew, what is coming… Looking at Geet, he did not wish to put her in this situation… 'I know Geet. You don't have to explain'.
She looked at him , into his eyes, in awe. His understanding and concern did touch her. He was a good man, always had been. When they were together, he always read her mind, even before she tells him… He looked like a child, who lost his favorite toy… His eyes were very dark, filled with a painfully gentle concern…
Tenderness welled in her. He had traveled such a long way and he wasn't going to get what he came for—what he would say he wanted, what he would call the right thing.
She wanted to touch him. Oh, to simply reach out and run her fingers through that shining dark hair, to trace his brows, to learn again the shape of his mouth. 'Geet.. what are you thinking…control yourself lady. You need to talk to him, about Daksh'.
He said it then, as if he had plucked the words right out of her mind. 'Geet, we need to talk about Daksh and his future. We need to decide the right thing for him'.
She leaned back in the counter and clasped her hands hard to the edge of the counter. 'Yes, we will talk. But your idea of the right thing and mine are not the same, Maan'.
He answered her with measured care. 'The right thing is the right thing, period'.
His voice was flat and stern. The tenderness in his eyes has gone. The Maan, she has seen in the evening has gone. This is the Maan Singh Khurana – A ruthless dictator, too forceful, too determined… who believes in his way, or no way… That means, she has to be more careful about what she is going to speak now.
The coffeemaker gave out an extra loud gurgling sputter. She glanced over her shoulder at it. Without saying anything, she turned to get mugs from the cabinet above the built-in sideboard. Filled the black coffee in mugs, added one cube of sugar for Maan and two for her.
Maan eyes softened as he recalled, how she remembered his preferences still…
'Geet, I don't believe, you still recall, how I take my coffee.'
Then only it struck her, she looked at the coffee mugs in her hand, and then Maan.
'Oh… well… I…' Maan understood, it came out of her naturally. How much, his likes and dislikes has merged with hers… Geet never used to take black coffee. Infact, she hated it to core. But, always make it for him, like how he preferred. Later on, she started taking sips of coffee from his mug…
They made their way to living room seating area. Once, they settled on the couch, a little away from each other, Maan waited for Geet, to start talking to him. But, that never happened. When he glanced her way, she was drawing circles on the edge of mug with her ring finger…
Which ever way he select to speak his mind, it would only come out baldly, he knew, but dressing it up with feelings she might scorn could very well tip the scales in a very negative fashion. She wouldn't trust emotions. Working from her reaction seemed the most viable option. He had to use reason and do it convincingly. He shifted near to her, slowly took her hands in his. Geet felt, an unknown fear gripping her… She wanted to draw back her hands… but, something in his eyes stopped her from doing so.
Maan thought, its now or never. Trying to keep the enormous tension he felt, out of his voice, he simply announced what he was aiming for…
'Geet… I want you to marry me!!!.'
Ganesh Kartikeya
41