Even though, I have to appear for my second last examination tomorrow, I sit here posting an OS I wrote a while ago in the middle of the night! 😆
Its not under any character in specific, henceforth you are free to imagine whoever you wish too! 😉
Here is it! Pardon the errors, whatsoever. And I know it's a little boring, but I still wanted to write it. 😃 Do leave in your comments, and/or hit the "Like" tab. I would be honored. 😳
One Shot: It is not about you Anymore
I still remember that back in time, I would lie in bed lifelessly with a nonchalant smile playing on my lips like nothing happened. I would assume your presence; I would assume that you were sitting right beside me, mesmerized of my beauty.
Not that I felt that I was beautiful, just that your gaze made a difference. Even though I had befriended endless agony and anguish, you always made me look like I was happy. Just looking at you for a second, or hearing a word from you would make me totally forget, all that you and your love made me suffer.
It was when you told me that I look beautiful did I realize I should stop considering myself ugly, it was when you told me that I meant a lot for you did I feel important, it was when you held my hand and assured that I am gonna rock it did I realize it was high time that I stopped underestimating myself. It was all about you and all because of you. Even though, you were the cause of my pain, you'd always be a part of who I am. Forever in my heart, would be cherished the days I spent with you.
It all started with a misconception that you were my friend, only to break into the reality. That you were not just a friend, you were a lot more. You were a person who showed empathy while people sympathized, you were the one who patted my back and told me that I was awesome while nobody really cared; you were the one who assured me that you'd be always by my side while again, nobody actually cared. How I wish, had I not misunderstood your concern as a friend, to be love.
I would always doubt the fact that you actually loved the girl you were with. I would always imagine myself and you to be together, I would always imagine myself to be the only object of your admiration. I never had a problem with the fact that you were taken. Neither did I despise or envy her, nor did I want to be her. I always knew I had a special place in your heart, I knew that if she were something to you, I was too. However, we were always one in my thoughts. In my dreams, we were inseparable, we were the epic lovers. But the truth was, that though we loved each other more than anything else, it was materialized differently, both sides.
You held me by the hand and told me, that no matter what I would always find you by my side. And you did keep your promise! You would turn red hot if I told I hurt myself, or somebody else did. You behaved like you were in possession of me. You always knocked off those people who looked at me in contempt. You were the one, I thought for you were always there. Even though, you took it differently.
You were straightforward enough; you always knew what I felt for you. Yet, you never wanted to let go of my friendship. You were helpless, you needed me and so did I. As I said, you were not oblivious of the fact that I loved you, you still kept mum. You loved me too; you cared for me and valued my friendship.
I remember all those times I had crossed all limits of insanity for you. Endless cutting, bleeding and hurting! All though, I never did it intentionally, now I realize it was only to gain even more attention from you.
Your compliments made me feel like the most beautiful creature ever born. The dream of resting my head on your torso while you caressed my hair made me feel like the shyest person ever born, I was never shy though. It was just you and me, but in a world only I was familiar with.
Every now and then, I find myself reflecting on how it ended. And even today, as I write this, I feel hundreds of needles running up my back. I feel my stomach knotted and with a heavy and pierced heart, I admit that I no longer love you. I did, I am sure of that but now the story is different. I had to leave you, what else could I have done? You told me you love me and that was precisely when I realized we were not meant to be. Irony of life!
Call me selfish, I wouldn't mind reason being, I am selfish. I pity myself. I have lost so much that it's hard for me to keep in mind that I also have learned so much. You taught me how to love, you taught me how to fight back and stand strong, and you taught me how to feel bliss out of some other heart's contentment. But sadly, I just couldn't take it anymore and then came the human nature into play. And now, after exactly four months from then . . . I say that it is no longer about you!
She's no more, she's in the Almighty's embrace now, I know you loved her more than your life and I know you somewhat, felt the same for me. However, I do not think I could have withstood the trauma anymore. I shall let you know that she will always be loved and missed and also, that I will never forget you for as long as I live.
Just remember, I did love you just like you loved her. I may not be with you, but once I urged to. I may not care as much as before, but I still do and I would want you to be happy ALWAYS. May God bless you, Mr. 24x7-Crazy! I loved you.
- Agony Aunt =)
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Index:
Page One: It is not about you Anymore
Page Seven: Valentine's, Memories and Promises
Page Fifteen: UNTITLED
Page Twenty-Three: One Peculiar Night . .
Page Twenty-Eight: Bin Tere . . .
Page Thirty-Four: Forever and Always!
Love Friendship Dating and Relationships
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