Mirage: (AR)-*NOTE PAGE 26* - Page 6

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pickytg thumbnail
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Posted: 15 years ago
#51

*reservved hai! :D hat jao sab!

*edit* koi hata ni tha and unko push kartein kartein mujhe 11 days lag gaye....*phew*! Btw, don't even wonder khud se what was it that brought me here...a lot on mind...and a book in the bag but needed to get online and cut time till my next class...so! (seriously...told ya no BIG reason, at all!)

the update...i likeyyyyy!!! :) surely i am still in the stay-away-mode and the comment might (or not) imply the depth..yet i read some good stuff so i shall just have to say that. Damini - i still don't see a face to her..but i cud picture the scene..the best from all you created in this one...him-her i mean! ...Rohan-Rid were the next in line which were very centered and strangely intriguing..! whose the dude? whoever it is, fits as HER bro...perfectly! :) ...Armaan-Modi...i didnt like...they were very usual, seen n heard..i am still waiting for something..:S kuch toh! ..AR..the smooth fall and his thoughts...hmm, again didnt make it...but soon, i hope! Nik-Ridz...were nice..passable as you developed the scene..!

In all...your writing has improved kiza in terms of capturing interest of reader and keeping it stable...yup! the story...with time...keep this going!

muah!

~me


ps: i live in chicago....if you've forgotten that little detail...
Edited by missypatel - 15 years ago
spln thumbnail
17th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 5
Posted: 15 years ago
#52
*reserved....will undo from a diff place then! :D

*edit*

abi YAHAN saare hat jao, mera reserve UNreserve hora hai jiiii! :D

dude, aren't you bloody surprised with this? and ain't i bloody committed and brilliant to my cases, and causes :D okie, seriously, there much, MUCH, i liked in this part.. in a vague overall statement i'd say it was 1. a vast improvement over the previous one, 2. i'm sure i can't pledge my soul over it, but i'd be close to say it was one among those u have done pretty finely :) so yeh, yeh yeh, grin wide! :D


the start was a freak! the good way... hehe... not for the quote u chose (which was also a smart pic, most importantly for the irony it presents in its implication and the historical engima who implied it... at some time) but far far more, for how u put para 1... i think, i'll say it best to declare, u made up for all the mess i thought u made with the beginning of the previous part..

there were other random things i liked... most of which can be summarized commonly as pertaining to the shades in each char u depict, specially in how subtle yet quick they can change... i think, its a fine job uve done creating, so far in this part, characters very believable in how the behavior of single human can vary so widely... ridhima, to nikki, to rohan, to armaan to abhi... and damni... yeh, it covers them all... i like thereality of variation they present from each other and within themselves..

there were two silly errors i seemed to spot (haha! yeh, don't blame me, it takes something to become perfect u know, ahem :D ) rohan wearing bulls... just sort of surprised me, cause they reside in london... yeh, the world is a small place... and we're all global and universal... it still sort of falls as a 'not obvious' ... guess that doesnt count as an error, plus, who knows u may link them from chicago at some point of the past...

second, the photo shot 'duo sitting on the fence'... and then armaan sitting and abhi 'stood' leaning against? ... ??? err? ... kiz!!! u made him sit and stand at once in the same shot? what is h, a char from the potter series? :D

third, was wondering... armaan was surprised ridhima talked of a lawsuit against her brother, for exploiting pwer of attorney? ... i'd think a damn successfullawyer as him would hardly find surprise in THAT... where there is uge money, aren't fam fueds the most obv? again, not really a mistake just somehow out of place, i thought...

khair, sachi, me likey! i enjoyed reading, i feel intrigued, and im willingly awaiting the story to proceed..

hugz hain, dhero~!! :D

chummaz too kidda,
daddda!!
Edited by spln - 15 years ago
hinz thumbnail
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Posted: 15 years ago
#53
*reserved...tho u didnt deserve one ;)
Prasanthi thumbnail
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Posted: 15 years ago
#54
*till i get back!
edit 1:
yayyy!!! read it.. will be back at night form commenting.😛
edit2:
Wohoo! Late though, I am still the first one to comment when compared with the ones above. *patting myself* 😃
Hmmm... guilty as I am here after 5 days of updating. You very well know the reasons. I am sneaking n hiding as I type this.😕
Coming to the part. This line " A meeting could be the start of something new, or the revival of something forgotten...A meeting is a miracle."... for me took away the cup. This just caught me up completely when I first read the part and the rest of the details got skipped. Ask me the reason the next time we chat. So, read the whole part again😛.
I just absolutely loved the way you took the start till the end full of *meetings*. ArAb/RiNi - Friends meeting after soooo very long. Armaan remembering his first meeting with Riddhima. Nikki's short meeting with Riddhima's bro, again the next meet of AR early in the morning. All in all.. its all about meeting miraculously. Me renaming the part, Meeting thy business.😛😉
Riddhima's past is yet to be uncovered completely. There are so many questions...how, why, where, when? Armaan's short stint with Damini was nice. AD together is yet to get into me, it would be so nice if its AR. AR ko jaldi together karde.. please 😳.
PS: For now, I am not asking you to update soon as I myself came here late...but remember.. its only for now.😆
Edited by Prasanthi - 15 years ago
topsyturvy23 thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail + 3
Posted: 15 years ago
#55
hey mind blowing ff
plz add me to ur pm list
-Anku- thumbnail
15th Anniversary Thumbnail Stunner Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 15 years ago
#56
Hey Kiran ....
I am new here but I have been a silent reader for quite a while and I love all your ffs so much !!!...and I am loving this one just as much,
This one is completely different from your other ffs....but I am sure it is going to be a treat to read..it already is.!!...
Love
Ankita
-Aliya- thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 15 years ago
#57
Hey great update...wow dat was interestin and funny at the last part.
Plz do pm me as wel. tnx update soon.
Tahmina😉
Norz thumbnail
20th Anniversary Thumbnail Sparkler Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 15 years ago
#58
awesome part
cant see armaan with damini
i know u hve plan something 4 AR
plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz add me to ur pm list
chahat_j thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Explorer Thumbnail
Posted: 15 years ago
#59
finally u updated...not much of AR bt the perfect ending....lolz
anitamalik thumbnail
17th Anniversary Thumbnail Stunner Thumbnail + 5
Posted: 15 years ago
#60
Kirannnn🤗

Ahhhhhh I finally read this!

I have to say the intro, I was really confused LOL I had to read it two times to figure out all that was going on...Nonetheless, I loved the detail..it added more to the picture!

And the first two parts are BRILLIANT! The ease with which you convey Armaan, Riddhimas emotions are too good! And I love the bonding the friends share <3 its super cute!

The end of part two...🤣 Oh yeah, you better make that scene detailed in the next part ;) LOL

Looking forward to knowing more about Riddhimas case against her bro...and Damini-Armaans relationship!


Ahh and i need to catch up on your last two fics! I shall do that soon!


PLEASE PM me when you update next Kirann!! Uni is starting again and I'll kind of be limited on time <3

Love, Anu!
Edited by anitamalik - 15 years ago

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