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Psycho Analysis
So had planned on giving this analysis later sometime because projects,school and 3hrs of sleep make you do that.But today's episode caught of me and forced me to pen down my take on it.
Today's episode tore me apart today.
Here is my take on it:
Shravan
He received a phone call from her,his heart shouted 'Love' and his his brain shouted 'Family'. And in the verbal war between the the most complicated things inside he ended up hurting himself,cutting away from her.But being back near her after he had realised his true feelings made it difficult for him to avoid and so he did what his heart shouted for and that was 'LOVE'.
He sat in her car anger,the product of concern burning inside him leading him to slightly raise his voice telling her to take care and not roam around pouring out her energy at full speed. She said she had something important to,he was confused definitely but this time his heart skipped a beat too.Why? Because the tone she used to addressed him made him feel loved,made him feel wanted.Then his mind striked and he realised that he had hurted her ,ignoring when she sat for hours and hours together just to meet him in the office and soon he blurted out apologizing and stating that she was not banned from the office indirectly hinting that he would never ignore her that way again.She said that the thing she wanted to say was way important to be told in office and his heart now skipped two beats accompanied by confusion doing some summer salts.They reached a cafe and she began telling how she wasn't ready to believe even when she saw the court papers and how after he had admitted about breaking PCT she was broken. and that one moment guilt floated in his eyes and his mouth felt dry.He flinched with slight happiness when she spoke that even after him admitting,her heart had refused to believe. A wave of relief was washed over when she spoke that she knew he had lied to her and how now she had no harsh feelings for him.He felt happy and settled when she said that she would not question him about the lying part and she would give him his time to understand himself.After all he that's what he wanted and his heart now commanded his lips to curl up,itself swelling up in joy because he loved the way she had understood him.He felt guilty for putting her up in so much pain and for making her question herself.He had cursed himself for a moment too,trying to compensate for not understanding her view, her meaning behind it when he had called himself her best friend.He knew she was irking him mentioning again and again,finding new ways to invite her from his side not because she wanted a treat but because he knew she wanted him to understand himself and give a chance where he could open up the wall around his heart for once pouring it out,giving satisfaction to no one but him.He then looked up at her and then the rain as if clearly feeling the same joy the rain brought to the weather.
He stood by the window drinking in the feeling of love remembering and smiling at those moments which had broken up the walls in him.He then remembered about his father and how he had expectations and certain wants from him.He was now torn up between to people which meant life to him.It was as if the rain was his replica. The tiny water droplets being the emotions of love and happiness inside him and the thunder/lightning being the constant war going on between them developing a fear in him just like the way the thunder/lightning did.Now restless he went to his pillar of support,his solution of the problems,his dad! He sat near his legs telling him how when year back when he was young he came here for the peace of his heart ,hinting that this was the same reason he was here back again.He sat telling his father,pouring out all the love he had in him for his father because he knew the topic he would start of soon with would need the father to understand that he loved him immensely. His heart now was like a overflowing dam whose gates had been opened to let the water out.Just like water rushed with speed spreading everywhere ,so did his emotions.All the piled up pain,love,guilt now was let open free to flow and the destination was his father.Just like heavy rainfall causes an overflow of dam,the pain in her voice and eyes he saw today caused the overflow of piled up emotions.He now had held it inside him enough and he had to let it out not just because of his pain but because now he realised that his habit and self restraint was not just taking him but her away too ,giving away pain to someone who meant life to him.His father and she was like two parts of his heart which had their own job but without one life won't be possible. But still he was willing to sacrifice one portion of his heart because of the other left portion because of the sacrifices it had made for him.When his father had told that he would need some time he felt as if he was a running water who had now forced and shut into a container that could now not run/flow away anywhere.But knowing that he was his father and he would do the best for him he left half of his heart belonging to her which felt lost and sad and the other which belonged to his father feeling lost but yet a bit supported.
My Personal thought to all- You people might think that he is willing to let go of Sumo for Ramnath and being a jerk but understand for Shravan,Ramnath is not just his father but his whole world,though Ramnath is a bad guy but at least he didn't abandon his son,he gave him proper things in life,gave him his heart to Shravan became his mother,friend and family.He was there even when Sumo wasn't.So of course for him Ramnath will be his everything.
P.S.-Please bear with Shravan today.I feel as if I haven't done justice to it as I am half zombie mode currently.
Suman
She was still not over the fact that he had not been involved in PCT case like she had imagined. She still couldn't get herself on the thought on why hadn't she even once tried to pull the emotions he hid behind the lie. She constantly was reminded by Kamini's word that said on how the misunderstandings had been because of Berry and how he had protected her by slapping him.The slap part shouted,said in itself that he cared.And now she cursed herself more when Preeta had told that she did not believe him at all. When Preeta could understand him then where and why did she fail,when she claimed to be his best friend,she thought.She was worried when he did not pick up her call,she thought that he really had decided to get back their relation to square. But she was goy back to relief when he had called.
She came to pick him up and her heart felt happy hearing and seeing his concern for her and when he said that she was allowed in the office,she had understood the indirect hint he had sent to her.But right for her the most important job was to apologize and clear their misunderstandings.So they reached the cafe and she baegan. Letting it all out,giving herself some peace and some to him. She had began putting herself down and not him because somewhere now she understood what pain had she put him through and how because of her wound he had failed to gain that trust on her.He had cut her in between trying to contradict her saying but she cut him because today she believed that she was one factor which turned him as he was today and no one not even him could turn that down because for her it was true and it was the part of her guilty leaving her.She sent him a hint about how he too should start discovering himself and letting it out but with understanding him and knowing that he was a slow and smooth person who needed his time.She knew her talks would trigger his already shaking heart but what she needed to know that she had to wait and so she did.She ordered coffee to avoid any awkwardness and with a happy,light and convinced heart she left.She felt in the raindrops as if taking in all the happiness,peace and love.
Today she had not only taught him but herself too .
Do share your views. All contradictory views welcome.
Thank You.
-Mitali❤️
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